


Moonlight on Snow

by WritLarge



Series: The Winter Burrow [5]
Category: Guardians of Childhood - William Joyce, Rise of the Guardians (2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Book/Movie Fusion, Angst, Awesome Baby Tooth, E. Aster Bunnymund Has Feelings, F/M, Father Frost is fatherly, Friendship, Jack Has Issues, Jack's powers are getting out of control, M/M, Mystery, Pining, Slow Burn, The believers are threatened, long fic, tags may be ambiguous, tags will be added as the story develops
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-07
Updated: 2017-05-25
Packaged: 2018-02-16 13:13:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 29
Words: 99,917
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2271021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritLarge/pseuds/WritLarge
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s been three hundred years and Jack is finally making friends and building up a little happiness of his own. After the Memory Box Incident, he isn’t sure he wants to look too closely at how he got here or know the details of his transformation from Jackson Overland to Jack Frost. Unfortunately, the small things over the years that always went wrong for him are beginning to add up to something a lot worse than bad luck.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I highly recommend reading the earlier parts of this series first. It will all make much more sense. Tags will change as things develop and are revealed, but the rating will remain the same (Teen to be on the safe side).

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

Aw, crap.

The remains of the oak tree are splintered and twisted, bent over the not-cold-enough-to-freeze-a-tree ground. Exploding trees don’t happen often and are even more uncommon in September, but of course I’d managed it. I’d only come out to see how the weather was getting on, which is a little warm for me maybe, but not uncomfortable. I think living in the Warren has been slowly getting me used to milder temperatures.

“Sorry tree.” I pat the bark and sigh. Aster’s going to chew me out for this big time. So much for my accumulated brownie points.

Dammit! It just doesn’t make any sense. The emotional surges and screw-ups I was having earlier in the summer, well… I wasn’t exactly in the best headspace after everything that happened. But now? What the hell is wrong with me? Why is it still so damn messed up? Yeah, I have believers and Guardian magic, but I’ve been working at this for months. 

I sigh and feel a little bit of dread settle on my shoulders to keep company with the disappointment and self-loathing that have been making themselves at home in my chest. I’ll have to tell Aster. He’s going to find out anyway. At least these flare ups don’t happen in the Warren anymore. This is so pathetic. Three hundred years and now I can’t even go for a walk without freezing something to death? 

Bunny’s going to be pissed when he finds out I killed an oak that was older than I am.

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

I can sense Jack quietly approaching the grassland where I’m sitting. It’d been a surprise to feel him enter the Warren five minutes ago. Thought he’d be out longer. First time in a while he’s been up top. I don’t bother opening my eyes and manage not to twitch when he stops about the length of that staff of his from where I’m sitting. I start a countdown from ten in my head.

“Sooooooo,” he begins when I reach three, “meditation, huh?” 

“Yes.” There’s a small pause. 

“It’s… quiet.”

“Yes.” I can hear him fidgeting. Any second now he’ll-

“Are you going to do this all morning?”

“No.” Apparently not.

“When do you think-“

“Jack,” I sigh and look up at him. He’s perching on the top of his crook, eyeing me curiously. “Is there something ya need?”

He shifts restlessly, which isn’t surprising I suppose. It’s just ticked over into September and summer is lingering. Jackie’s certainly been tolerating the warmer weather better. Hasn’t crashed at all. From his talk of previous years, that’s an aberration. Even with being able to travel south, Jack had said he felt weaker during the hot months in the Northern hemisphere, not quite his usual self. He’s a Guardian now, though. He has believers, few though they are, and that should give him a bit more protection than your typical winter spirit. 

“I was just… uh, do you have a computer?” Frostbite’s got that look, one I’ve seen a few times now. A speck of cautious hope buried under a layer of affected nonchalance, shuttering something else behind it. He blinks a little when I don’t reply right away. “Do you know what a computer is?”

“Do I- ? Yes, ya dill.” I try to keep from snapping at him. I won’t be finding any peace this morning, will I? “I know what a computer is. I was building them before this planet had life on it, I’ll have you know.” 

“Oh. Yeah.” He’s wide-eyed and contrite now. That one I don’t see so often. “Sorry.”

“S’all right, Frostbite.” I stretch and rise. I’m not wearing anything at the moment, not even my bracers and I half expect some crack from him about it. When I peer over he’s still curled up atop his staff, his gaze off somewhere towards my left. Distracted. The slightly cool breeze that drifted in with him ruffles his hair lightly, spending the last of its energy before dissipating.

He wants a computer, does he? I might have something. We’re near the centre of the Warren, currently an open area of grass and wildflowers, and no real machinery. Not much use for it. Whatever older tech is still around would be in the farther off storage tunnels. “Might have some things if you want to look. What do you need with a computer anyway?”

“Um-” Jack snaps out of his reverie and pops down to the ground, running a self-conscious hand along his staff. Hmm. Something’s bugging him. No point in asking though, because he’ll just deny it. 

“Forget it. Come on. Got a bit of a walk to get there.” Jack looks relieved at the lack of inquiry on my part and starts walking. He doesn’t issue a challenge over racing like he might’ve done before, because he knows how uncomfortable I am letting that Wind blow through here freely. I don’t mind Frostbite affecting the natural elements of the Warren, but the Wind he rides is something else. I don’t trust it.

We walk quietly for a minute or so. The Warren is just a touch cool today. The soft grass underfoot gives way to rougher terrain and I wonder, not for the first time, how accustomed to exposure Jack’s feet are. They haven’t any visible callouses, but I’ve yet to see any surface give him pause. It’s a pleasant walk and it doesn’t take long for him to start twirling his staff a little, shedding that odd tension from his frame.

“How far are we talking about here, Bunny?” he asks. “If it’s on the far side, that’s more than ‘a bit’ of a walk for me.” 

“And?” I return. Jack’s eyes spark, indicating that whatever was weighing him down had been overcome by his inherent need for mischief.

“Annnnd you could take pity on me and give me a ride,” he grins impishly, raising one eyebrow suggestively. Brat. 

“Yeah? Hop on, then.” The look on his face is beyond worth. Jack’s mouth hangs open and emits a slight squeak before he snaps it closed and blushes. He’s been giving me more than a little practice over the summer with teasing and word play. Have to admit, it’s easier to enjoy the banter with someone I know won’t hold it against me if I muck it up. Jackie talks a big game but he doesn’t mean anything by it, not really, and he’s happy to assume the same of me.

“No? Suppose it’s a little intimidating - slow and steady’ll get you there eventually, right?” That rouses him and he targets me with a determined glare.

“Right. Hold still Kangaroo.” I give Jack a few seconds to wrap his arms around my shoulders, grasping his staff across my chest, before I spring forward, making him shriek in surprise. Now this is fun. The ground slopes downward, allowing me to pick up speed. After a minute he stops clinging and lets out a whoop when I leap up and rebound off a hill wall. The contact is nice. Seems to happen more and more, a challenge here or a casual lean there, but Jack won’t ever ask for it outright. I may not be aces at hugs, but I wouldn’t turn him away. When we arrive he’s breathless, giggling into my back. His flushed face peeks up over my shoulder. 

“That was awesome,” his grin widens. “Next time, though? You come flying with me.”

“Oh, hell no.” Jack tumbles down, laughing loudly. I give him a hand up and turn to the doorway. There’s nothing much to see here but rock and hanging moss. The tunnel isn’t used often and it shows. Even the entrance isn’t plain to see, though Jack’s been through a lot of the Warren exploring over the years. Wonder if he ever found it? He pokes at the hanging greenery curiously. I know there’s a bit of an incline to get down to the main room, so I give Jack a playful shove through the mossy drapery. He knows exactly what I’m doing and slides down with another laugh. 

“Wow, this is like some weird sci-fi junkyard,” he exclaims as the lights pulse on. 

It's rather barren compared to the rest of the Warren, only a few intrepid patches of moss making a go of it. The tunnels and rooms are littered with broken and disassembled Pookan technology – robots, control panels, pieces of the train that was. The overhead lights, softly glowing orbs set into the walls, give the metal detritus a warm yellow grey cast and the dust motes we’ve stirred up are visible in the air. I’ve been working more with organic magic and tech since the Easter Bunny shift and this area’s been left to languish in the dark. It's been a long while since I’d last wanted to revisit these memories. Doesn’t seem so daunting now.

“Might seem like that. Humans have been improving, but they’ve a ways to go yet.” We pick our way past the twisted metal scrap towards the more intact pieces of hardware.

“Hey, this looks like a mini egg sentry. Sort of. It’s more… pointy?” Jack holds up the slightly dented upper half of an egg shaped robot with arms.

“Soldier egg. They were mostly destroyed or damaged in the big battle with Pitch when the Guardians first formed. Had to gather all the pieces up so humans wouldn’t find’em. Never built any others. Didn’t seem much point.”

Jack fiddles with the robot, wiggling the arm joints and peering inside the circuitry, but he doesn’t say anything.

“The spells on them are long dead. My googies are organic and infused with magic at their core, where the Sentinels may be a bit organic in their structure but are mostly programmed the usual way with no magic required. These old things were a bit of both. Built a lot back then. Even had a train once upon a time.”

”Cool.” His voice is soft and he’s unusually quiet, which makes me wonder what he’s thinking on.

“Thought you wanted a computer though?”

“I-” Jack glances up, pausing. “Actually, could we rebuild a few of these?”

“Sure, don’t know why not. Why?“ 

“Minions, Aster. We need minions.” The mischief that dances in his eyes is a bit of a relief. “Prankbots.”

Ah. Yeah, I’d agreed to something like that, hadn’t I? He’d been so damned earnest about helping. Hasn’t said anything about it since though. I’m not strictly opposed to the idea. Wouldn’t mind getting one up on North. Just, well, I’ve had enough missteps with humour to be reluctant. 

“I don’t want to cause too much damage, Frostbite. These things have weapons-“

“No, no, no. We don’t need them weaponized. Not with anything harmful anyway.” A raised eyebrow seems to communicate my skepticism well enough. “I was thinking maybe paint, like from the glitter pools?”

An image blooms in my mind of Nicholas St. North done up in pastels and glitter, likely cursing my name. That’s bloody tempting. I can feel the eager hope that Jack’s trying to rein in.

“All right. We’ll give it a go.” A cheer goes up from Jack. “You’re lending a hand though.”

“Sure! Just tell me what to do.”

The larrikin tries, he does. I’ll give him that. Jack’s no engineer though. He’s fine with straight up manual labour and helps out in the Warren where I let him. He’s also quite the artist, which I can appreciate, though he’s not much of a painter. He’s useless with the googies on account of liking them too much keep’em in line. Jack’s a big plaything as far as they can tell and he let’s them walk all over him, literally. More tactile mediums work better. Got him working with some clay to keep him busy one day and now I’m firing things in the kiln weekly. Might even get him to work up some figures to use for chocolate molds.

While Jackie fumbles and mutters over assembling legs, I fall into a rhythm piecing back together the innards of the things, reorganizing their mechanical guts as I go. I’ll need to leave room for internal tanks. Won’t do to have them visible. Might give the blustery bastard too much warning. Better if they look mostly the same so he’ll let his guard down for’em, though if I remove the arms all together there’ll be more room in the chest and the nozzle- 

“-ny? Aster?” The tone of Jack's voice lets me know that he’s been trying to get my attention for a bit. Oops. I must have tuned him out while I was working. My ears snap up and I turn to Jack attentively. He’s back to looking a bit self-conscious again. “The meditation thing? Why did you start doing that?”

“Meditating?” Blinking, it’s a moment before his hesitant question connects. 

“You didn’t use to. I never sa- Umm, nevermind...” Jackie’s blushing now, lavender spreading across his pale skin. It’s been mentioned that he spent no small amount of time watching me over the years that he’s been hiding in the Warren, but knowing what I know now I can’t be too angry with him. I’m more annoyed at myself for being bloody oblivious to it. I’m lucky it was Jack and not someone actually malicious.

“No worries, Frostbite,” I try and smile disarmingly and his embarrassment lightens. “Used to meditate regularly, during and after the shift.”

“From Logical Pookan Warrior to Cuddly Easter Bunny, right? Wait,” Jack looks at me with growing glee, “did you actually get all small, cute, and fluffy first?” 

“No.” My exasperated glower only serves to make him giggle. Believer magic. Bah. Turning into a wee bunny had not been the expected outcome. When I’d shifted, taking on more earth and believer bound magic as a Guardian, shape shifting into other incarnations of the Easter Bunny archetype had become possible. I’d only done it once or twice. It was altogether too vulnerable.

“But you can if you want to, right?” he grins. No. Absolutely not. I can see where this is headed.

“When I shifted,” the explanation begins with my best changing-the-subject-now tone, “the emotional aspect was a bit rough. I needed to find a new sort of balance. Meditation helped.” 

Pooka were emotional, we were just more controlled and generally had a more conservative instincts than most humans. The sudden influx of wildly out of proportion and completely inappropriate emotions had been horrifying at first. I’d not only had to learn better control, but utterly redefine my own personal expectations and definitions of reasonable and proper. 

“I went off a few times on the others. North took the brunt of it at first, but when I lost control and raged at one of the children… Thought maybe I’d do better keeping to myself for a while.”

“Is this the anger thing?” Jack questions. “Because, it’s not that bad. You handled Pitch without losing it and you could have done worse to me with good reason and you didn’t.” 

Oh here we go. Unless it’s all fun and games, Jack can’t seem to take a kind word without dismissing it, can’t let himself be proud of what he’s accomplished. No, he’s got to go on about his past mistakes and making things up to people and generally go beyond any reasonable apology and veer into self-flagellation. 

“I mean, you were really mad that Easter and I totally deser-" The deeply unimpressed look I level at him halts the sentence in its tracks. We’ve talked about this before and agreed not to bring up past transgressions on either side. Jack blinks and coughs, shifting his weight. “You do get super grumpy sometimes though. Did I tell you about my Easter Grump theory?”

“Yeah, ya galah. It wasn’t a revelation.” I had been surprised that he’d noticed.

“Is it just anger?”

“Mostly. Except, well, I don’t know. Never had an issue with fear or anxiety and the like, but emotions that are more-?” I gesture with my hands and have no idea what I’m trying to say, really. Bloody feelings.

“Passionate?” Jack guesses.

“Can’t say I really know.” Being alone for thousands of years and then only befriending a few other humans, most of them children, had not provided much opportunity for that sort of thing. Most other spirits were wary of me and not without good reason, except for that handsy groundhog I’d had to chase back down into his burrow. “Never came up that way, but it might be similar.”

“You-“ Jack paused and blushed. “You don’t, umm…”

Strewth, of course he’s going to ask, three hundred year old teenager that he is. What the hell am I supposed to say? That any urges I may have had were long buried and I doubted anything could rouse them and I’d no incentive to try, except that this past summer you’ve started with your blasted teasing and almost-cuddling and I’m trying not to think about it, why don’t we just avoid the topic all together, yeah? 

No.

“Meditation is something I’ve been doin’ since I was young,” and I’m back to the changing-the-subject-now tone. “Bad habit to let the routine lapse really.” 

There’s a long awkward silence where Jack fidgets with his staff. 

“Could you teach me?” The request is uncertain; like he’s worried I might say no. “I haven’t had the best control over my powers since the tooth box. Do you think it would help?”

“I thought things had been better?” I ask cautiously. They had been as far as I knew. Jack hadn’t frozen anything in the Warren unintentionally for weeks. He’d even managed dishes without icing the water.

“Yeah, so did I.” Jack sags a little and looks up at me hesitantly. “I kinda exploded an oak earlier today.”

I open my mouth to react and Jack curls in on himself ever so slightly, like he’s bracing himself against… me. The thought makes me snap my jaw shut hard and breathe out noisily through my nose. An oak. In September. I swallow the frustration down hard.

“Then it’s definitely worth a try,” I manage to reply without too much gruffness. The surprise in his wide blue eyes is accompanied by a growing hope. 

“Thanks, Bunny.” Jack smiles almost shyly and it washes the last of my anger on behalf of the oak away completely. If he ever finds out just how difficult it is for me to say no to him, I’ll be doomed if I’m not already. Now I have to face meditating in the presence of my main emotional trigger. Bonzer. 

”Start tomorrow?”

“Yeah,” Jack nods and returns to wrestling with the legs. I look down to see that I’ve mangled the part I’m holding, though I don’t think he’s noticed. 

“About these-" I wave vaguely towards the pile, hoping that he’ll leap at getting back to a less sensitive topic.

“Prankbots!”

“Prankbots. What exactly do you want’em to do?” Jack’s face lights up as he outlines his plan. 

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄  
_(Winter Burrow, chapter 12 happens between the previous section and this one)_

“Awesome.” I’m a bunch-of-greats uncle, I haven’t unintentionally unleashed icy terror in a week, and the prankbots are almost ready to go! Sliding down the tunnel, I land close to the winter burrow entrance and make my way inside.

A light coat of ice over the walls makes them more solid, but I don’t take the temperature down quite as far as I used to. The place has changed a lot since Aster and I came to an agreement about me staying. It’s kind of ironic that the more livable it’s become, with the added space and furniture, the less time I spend here. I know I’m at Bunny’s more than I should be. I’m pretty sure he’ll let me know if I annoy him too much, though. 

Aster’s been super patient teaching me to meditate. It’s harder than it looks. I think it’s working. Even when I can’t quite settle, Aster is right there, peaceful and warm, and just watching him helps. I doubt Bunny’s ever had a panic attack before. Anger might make you act rashly but it doesn’t make you helpless and pathetic. I still get the urge to crawl into his lap sometimes. Just to feel him and be held. He probably would if I asked, but I’m over the emotional wreckage of spring and if I did it would be… it would feel like something else. 

Passion. He totally avoided that question. I’d probably made him uncomfortable by asking. It’s not like there are any other Pooka left for him to lust after. If he’s been alone and celibate for thousands of years… What do I know anyway? I’ve never even kissed anyone, slobbery pecks from Sophie aside. Except, maybe I have? I don’t have all my memories back from being Jackson Overland yet. 

Aster hasn’t brought up the death thing again, hints about talking to the other Guardians aside, but I can’t get the implications out of my head. What am I? Am I a spirit, which isn’t the same as a ghost, even though I didn’t choose to become a spirit and that’s apparently a requirement? Do I still have a soul? Are there even such things as souls? Did I die or was I revived? Aster is adamant that I’m not a walking corpse. I guess it's my own fault for dragging my feet about going to see Tooth and viewing the memories more carefully. Maybe after Christmas.

I look around at my place and it’s looking good. The furniture is resistant to cold damage and everything is in its place. It’s better off than I am. Catching my reflection in the flat sheet of ice along the far wall, I can see that my clothes are showing their age. I’m going to have to replace them soon, especially if more people are actually able to see me now. Aster might have a few suggestions, or maybe one of the others. The meeting is in a week.

My timing ends up being pretty good today, because as I turn towards the door a little egglet toddles in with the word “hungry?” scrawled across its smooth yellow shell in purple ink. Might as well eat.

I scoop up the egg and head for Aster’s, skipping a little as I go. We’re really close to having the prankbots ready. The plan is to have them finished in the next two days so that we can see the results at the meeting. While Bunny may be looking forward to getting one up on North, I am eager to hand out some payback to the yeti. They patched me up after the battle, but it had been done pretty begrudgingly. They still didn’t like me very much and there’s some lingering resentment on my side too, I have to admit.

“Evening, mate.” Bunny’s waiting for me in the doorway. 

“Hey! Ready to have some fun?” I knock into his shoulder and he gives a little push in return. I drop the egglet and it scampers away.

“Food first,” he insists, stepping aside so I can enter. Bunny’s really strict about keeping food away from the bots. “Then we can get to work.”

“Whatever you say.” He snorts in response and I try and smother my smile. So I might have some issues with following instructions, but it was just the one robot. How was I supposed to know it would explode like that? 

“Hey, Aster?” I drop into my chair and catch his attention as he’s bringing the last few things to the table.

“Yeah, Frostbite?” 

“Thanks for helping Jamie with his project.” Aster just nods and passes me glass of water that I drink from without even frosting. Things are definitely getting better. Maybe I won’t have to bring it up at the meeting after all? I dig into dinner with a little too much enthusiasm though, the way Bunny coughs to get my attention.

“Ya don’t need to inhale it, mate. We’ve got time.”

“Two days, Bunny!”

“Well,” he smiles at me, “you’re just not used to working with a deadline. No worries. We’ll be good.”

“Not good. Good is not good enough! We need to be Awesome. Hurry up!” 

“All right, all right.” Aster responds with one of his un-laughs and gets eating after I kick him under the table. “Awesome it is.” 


	2. Chapter 2

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

So, I’m not nervous. No way. Not me. Bunny glares and I stop kicking the table leg.

Ok, maybe I’m a little nervous.

“You don’t have to talk about anything you don’t want to Jack.” I shrug my shoulders in response. I know he wants me to. He’s been pretty clear about how I should be letting my friends help. But the dead thing? What if they don’t react like Aster did? What if they’re horrified or disgusted or- I don’t know... It just feels wrong.

“Let’s go.” It comes out depressingly flat. Aster sighs at my lack of enthusiasm before opening a route to North Pole. 

We travel the tunnel together, the distance underground never matching up to how far we actually go, and exit onto the snow near The Workshop. Before he can start complaining about the cold I grab him under the arms and we fly up to the main doors.

“Thanks.” It’s amusingly gruff. Bunny really hates any kind of flying. 

Phil greets us at the doorway and I burst out laughing while he growls and smacks his palm with his fist. Ok, so he’s not taking it so well. Aster is trying to hide his smile when he puts a hand on my back and hurries me forward. We pass through into the warmth of the building and the door is slammed shut. I can’t wait to see North.

Phil growls at us again and I guess we’re supposed to follow him. The air is too dry and it smells like sawdust. Then we pass through the globe room and I realize why. The floor has been torn up. 

“What happened?” The yeti just glares, stomping up a set of stairs and pointing viciously at another door. It’s made of a densely grained wood and carved festively with holly leaves. When Aster opens it, I can see Toothiana flitting nervously back and forth over the red and gold carpet. Strangely, none of her mini fairies hover around her. Knocking the door shut behind us with my crook, I can feel Phil’s heavy footsteps vibrating along the floorboards as he trudges away, grumbling still audible as he goes.

“Aster! Jack!” She zooms over. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re here!”

“Bunny,” North booms a welcome, crossing from the window and continuing darkly, “and Jack.”

“What?” I try keeping a straight face, but Bunny’s huff of amusement sets me off and then I’m laughing. “Oh wow. Your beard!”

“That was you?” Toothiana asks eagerly. North glowers even as his lips begin to turn up.

“Half! Only half me! Aster built the robots,” I point at my co-conspirator. Aster shrugs his shoulders, grinning a little when North’s look of utter betrayal lands on him. 

“Balakirev!” North pokes Aster in the chest. “When did you get a sense of humour?”

“I’ve fallen in with a bad crowd, what can I say?” I wasn’t really paying attention before, but it’s pretty obvious now that North and Aster are bros. Just in the way they argue and insult each other. Bunny’s been visiting North more since the battle with Pitch, probably catching up after his self imposed anger management exile, and North actually came to dinner at the Warren once. Not sure the vegetarian fare agreed with him though.

“This is how it is, then?” North throws an arm around Bunny’s shoulders and laughs loudly. “Ha! You and your eggs. You just wait Bunny. You are not the only one who can build these sort of things.”

“I think I’d see a hulking djinni coming my way without too much difficultly, but you’re welcome to try, mate.” 

“Oh really? You-“ North and Bunny are off trying to one up each other, but Tooth is looking like she’s going to bolt any minute.

“Hey, why are you wound so tight? Where is everybody?” I look around again, but nope. No minis.

“Oh. Well. The fairies, they- they’re…” she begins and then sags a little in the air. “They mutinied.” 

“The fairies?” Go Baby Tooth! 

“Yes,” she sighs and smiles sheepishly. “Apparently they had a meeting about it. Baby Tooth is taking over for the evening so I can have some time off.” 

“Good on her. You deserve a break now and then. She’s a capable one,” Aster interjects, clearly one ear on our conversation while North rants about transforming robots. Bunny and Baby Tooth have become fast friends after tag teaming me during those first few weeks following the Tooth Box Incident. He probably helped her plot the mini fairies little rebellion. I asked him once if he was planning on making Baby Tooth her own tiny bandolier, to which he replied that the whole thing was my fault for giving her a taste of independence and adventure in the first place.

“And how are you, Jack? How’s the Winter Burrow.” She says it like that, with capitals and everything. “You to seem to be getting along well.”

“Umm, yeah. It’s good. You know, decorating and things.” There’s a stretch of silence where Tooth just watches me expectantly. “Err. Aster made me a sign. Oh, and we built prankbots. That’s how we spread the joy that is glitter.”

“You certainly did that,” she giggles and peeks over at North. “The pastel base is remarkably thorough. I’m surprised you managed to get his beard.”

“Me too!” I totally was. The glittering robin’s egg blue was better than I’d imagined. “That was a the stretch goal. I totally thought we’d get some of the yeti and that North would somehow evade Prankbot Prime. Aster was pretty determined though.”

“Oh, I don’t doubt that.” Her sly grin speaks to her in depth knowledge of Aster and North’s ongoing friendly antagonism. “Nicely done.” 

“Thanks, though it was really mostly Bunny. I’m kinda useless outside of snowball fights and freezing things solid, you know?” As soon as the words are out of my mouth I can feel Aster’s eyes on the back of my neck. 

“’Cept for the part where it was all your idea to begin with, Frostbite - plotting the routes, memorizing yeti routines…” Aster’s almost glaring at me. He doesn’t think I put enough value on the things I can do, but it’s not like I can really do all that much. I couldn’t have gotten into The Workshop on my own, that’s for sure. Snowballs and fun times right? Pretty lucky that fun was Pitch’s biggest weakness.

“So what I am hearing is that I owe you both a special surprise, yes?” The big man grins widely at me. It’s not a jolly thing. 

Oooookay. Time for a change of subject.

“So, what happened to the floor downstairs?” 

“Is being fixed, of course.” North blinks, surprised as though the answer should be obvious.

“Did something happen to it?” Elves probably. I sometimes wonder where North found the ridiculous little guys. 

“The symbols are needing to be changed. We have five Guardians now, not four. Bunny and I will show you new design later, hmm?”

“I- what?” That’s about all I manage to get out when Sandy sails into the room, doing a quick double take and then zooming up close to North.

“What? Is new look. You don’t like it?” North strokes his beard, preening. Sandy glances back and forth between the Guardians confusedly then pointedly flings and exclamation mark at me.

“Sandy, I’m hurt. What’s makes you think it was me?” Sandy is having none of it and expressively sasses me as only he can. “Aster helped.”

That earns an even bigger exclamation mark and Sandy claps his hands delightedly when Bunny nods in confirmation. He flashes a series of symbols that go right over my head, but Bunny understands the gist of it.

“Yeah, mate. I’ll send you copies.”

“Pictures? Oh, I want some too!” Toothiana adds excitedly.

North is sputtering while they discuss the photographic evidence that the prankbots collected. I’m still a bit stunned by the floor. I can’t believe he actually tore it up already. Did he ask the others first? I haven’t even been a Guardian for a year and I’ve only got seven believers. What is he thinking?

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

I can almost hear the wheels spinning like mad in Jackie’s head. I think the floor redesign has upended him a bit. Maybe I should have warned him. Ah well, he’ll adjust.

North had mentioned it when I’d come up for a chin wag. It was a good idea, concrete evidence that Jack was well and truly stuck with us. I knew it might give him a shock though. Jackie probably wouldn’t really settle in with the group for a while yet. Since Easter he’s stopped briefly to chat with Sandy up top, studiously avoided The Workshop, and visited the Tooth Palace a few times when he’d been cajoled by Baby Tooth. Those occasions were noticeable by the parcels of food and packages of floss that returned with him. It’s a start. True bonds will build in time now that we’re coming back together, as friends as much as Guardians.

“The girls will want to see everything! Though if this is about to explode into a prank war, I’m claiming neutrality in advance.” Tooth’s doing pretty well. Baby Tooth was right to get her out. She’s probably the worst of us for working herself to the bone, even with her tiny army of helpers. 

“You’re too late,” Jack crowed, lighting up with glee. ”Baby Tooth is already firmly on Team Awesome.”

Yeah, Baby Tooth discovering her own little backbone is the best thing that could have happened really. Jack won’t believe it, but it’s his doing, and not just saving her when he did. He treated her like her own person. The rest of us would have just acted towards her as an extension of Toothiana, which she was still in a way, though I haven’t any idea when Tooth last absorbed any of them. Jack probably doesn’t know the history on that yet. 

He’s puffed up proudly now, thrilled to have the little fairy as an eager co-conspirator. Frostbite’s joy is contagious and a whirl of _something_ flutters in my stomach, startling me into pulling my gaze from him. The feeling flickers around in my chest until I manage to smother it and Sandy quirks a curious eyebrow in my direction. 

“There is no such thing as neutral, Tooth,” North declares, grinning. A yeti appears and burbles from the doorway. “Ah. Snacks while we wait for dinner.”

We migrate to the sitting area and I sink into a chair when North claims the couch. It doesn’t surprise me when Jack opts to perch on his staff next to me. His feet curl around the top of his crook, pale and perfect, balancing there effortlessly. Still haven’t gotten around to asking him to pose, though I’ve managed enough sketches of him despite it. Sandy floats by and eyes me again, his scrutiny thankfully interrupted when a surly yeti herds several elves over to deliver drinks and a platter of small cookies. 

We talk for a bit to catch up – tooth box reorganization, sleigh upgrades, believer numbers and the like. Could have done without the lecture on periodontal disease, but it helps Tooth relax and she holds up most of the conversation. Surprising no one, Sandy dozes off mid argument while we’re debating the spread of Christmas trappings up into October. When North jostles him awake with an elbow Sandy gapes and begins giggling again. Frostbite smirks.

“Bah,” North shakes his head genially and waggles a finger in Jack’s direction. “Yeti already added you back to Naughty list or I would have to do it myself, yes?”

“Nicholas!” The shocked exclamation from Tooth is joined by frowns all around.

“Oh, does not matter,” North waves a hand. “Is not on List, just on list.”

“What?” He’s not making much sense. Jack initially seemed pleased by his notoriety with North, but he’s tensed up now. 

“Jack’s name is on note, tacked to the top of The List. Actual Naughty List does not show spirits, only human children.” North explains it like it should be common knowledge, which it isn’t. He created the damn thing.

“But…” Jack blinks in confusion. “I was on the List though, before I became a Guardian. Wasn’t I?”

“It was the same as this. Not on List, but on list. It does not matter now. Slate is wiped clean,” North states firmly and shoves a cookie into his mouth, his explanation at complete odds with how he first greeted Jack months ago. Strewth, it hasn’t even been a year, has it? 

Jack frowns to himself. Something is brewing up in his thoughts. He hasn’t spoken much on the subject, but I know he’s been up to The Workshop over the years and never been welcome. 

Tooth opens her mouth to break the awkward silence, but doesn’t get anywhere before Jack starts in on North.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

“Wait a minute,” the exclamation bursts out of me. List and list? What the hell? Landing on the rug, I turn and stare at North. “If I wasn’t on the Naughty List, why wouldn’t you talk to me?”

“You wer-“ 

“Why did the yeti hate me so much?” 

“Well-“

“You said I held the record.”

“I was mostly joking about that.“

“Joking!” North presses back against the sofa and I realize that I’ve swung my staff up to point and him threateningly.

“Frostbite.“ North’s red shirtfront has gone white with ice crystals, spreading across the sofa cushions. Aster grips my shoulder, making me flinch and drop my staff on the floor. My hands are shaking.

“Jack-“ Tooth reaches out to me and I stumble back into Bunny, who pulls me closer. It takes more than a few deep breaths for me to regain my calm.

“I wasn’t on the List at all?” I hate how weak my voice sounds. “How did you know my name? How did you even know what I looked like? You never came out to see me.”

“Yeti. They make notes and drawing from when… from seeing you.” North is picking his words carefully, like he’s trying not to upset me. The light layer of snow dusts off him as he straightens.

“So, you didn’t know him then?” Bunny asks North calmly, his arm a firm weight on my shoulders. I can’t find it in me to be embarrassed enough to pull away and instead shift closer.

“No. Sketch did show what Jack looked like. I thought he was an elemental or winter sprite that was Changing, yes? I was playing along, thinking perhaps it would work better, but then... Well, it was obvious yes?”

“Because Jack was human, right?” Tooth glances confusedly between us. “He looks human-“

“Yeah, but you wouldn’t talk to me either.” Examining the carpeting seems like a good idea right now. “The fairies always avoided me. Bolting in the other direction, even.”

“Oh. Well, of course they did,” she answers. Aster gently tugs me backward and I end up sitting in the chair while he settles on the arm. My shoulders feel oddly cold without his warmth. “My fairies are quite small Jack, and we’ve always preferred to stay hidden. Most spirits who take an interest in us aren’t especially friendly. A few have been eaten and I’ve had to rescue others from being kept as ‘pets’ too”.

That’s really awful, if that was what they mostly got from other spirits. I guess being caged up by Pitch wasn’t exactly a first for them.

“It wasn’t anything I did?” My eyes flicker up involuntarily. Tooth looks sad.

“Oh no Jack. They quite admired you from a distance.” Her wings are tucked back and she’s standing hesitantly, looking between Aster and I. Bunny catches her attention and Tooth stares over my shoulder intently, but before I can look up at him a cup nudges my hand. It’s eggnog. Sandy makes me take it while his sand flashes rapid fire at Aster. When the symbols drop away, Bunny looks down at me seriously.

“Sandy wants to know why you didn’t try and talk to him.” It looked like there was a lot more said than that, but Bunny’s probably condensing for my sake. Sandy nods at me expectantly.

“I did. I tried, I mean. To visit you. It’s just that the few times I did, there was always this… feeling. The wind would practically fall out from under me. You never really looked at me either, so I guess I thought you wanted me to stay away, though you didn’t seem to mind me watching you work.”

Sandy is clearly upset by my explanation and shakes his head violently, flashing a few more images at Bunny.

“Sandy says when he tried to approach you, you held him away with your wind.” Aster’s grimacing. He doesn’t actually believe that, does he?

“No I didn’t!“ I would have given anything to be able to talk to someone then. “No way. Sandy-“

“Jack, it’s all right.” Tooth sets my staff against my leg and lays a gentle hand on mine. 

“It’s not! I was trying to find you guys. No one ever listened to me. I wouldn’t have-“ Toothiana gasps and a sharp crack comes from my right. The cup of eggnog that Sandy had given me is frozen, broken into shards in my grasp. It’s happening again.

Tooth is clutching her hand to her chest, frost sheathing her fingers. Oh no.

“Jack-" I don’t catch whatever Aster was trying to say, because I’m already over the back of the chair and flinging myself out the window. 

I have to get away before I can hurt anyone else.


	3. Chapter 3

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

I can’t believe I hurt Tooth. 

The Wind is pulling at me, encouraging me to leap off the rooftop and into the sky. My muscles actually ache with the effort to stay put. I can’t just take off on them though. I can’t. 

My feet are buried in the snow of the tiny roof, not far from the window of the sitting room. If I try I can hear Bunny calming the others down. It’s pretty disappointing how one-sided our friendship seems to be. There’s too much of him helping me with my issues and not enough of me being a friend to him. I’m trying with the fun and stuff. It’s just… Bunny doesn’t need me. I want to believe in our friendship, but there’s got to be a big helping of pity mixed into it, because I’ve been pretty pitiful lately. Sooner or later Aster’s going to get sick of my problems, if he isn’t already livid over what I did to Tooth.

Still making a mess wherever I go, aren’t I? 

“Jack?” I whirl around, clutching my staff. Toothiana is shivering while she hovers. What is she doing?

“You should stay away from-” 

“Stop, Jack. It was an accident,” she interrupts me firmly. “I’m fine. Please come back inside.” 

“I can’t.” I nearly froze her hand off, but instead of being angry or scared, Tooth just looks exasperated.

“Aster’s going to climb down here if you don’t.” Oh, that’s not fair.

“All right. Just give me a minute.” The agreement is all she seems to need before Toothiana zips back inside the sitting room, probably even more frozen now. I shake off the snow that’s settled on my shoulders. The Wind still wants me to go but it only takes a quick tug before it concedes and I’m up to the window.

I fumble with the latch a bit as I enter. I’m going to have to tell the others something. Zombie Snow Spirit, while accurate, will probably get me yelled at by Bunny. He only ever shouts over things like that now. I still can’t believe he didn’t lose it over the oak tree. I should be getting a boomerang to the head for Tooth’s hand.

The other Guardians all have these epic origins. Nicholas St. North, hero of Santoff Clausen. Toothiana, Sister of Flight and protector of children’s teeth. Sanderson Mansnoozie, star pilot who fought the legendary Dream Pirates. Not to mention E. Aster Bunnymund, intergalactic warrior rabbit. They were heroes who had risked their lives again and again. I’m just an idiot who didn’t properly check the ice and ended up offing myself to save my sister. I’m not as smart or brave or amazing as any of the others. I had the brute force strength they’d needed when they were hurting and Pitch’s Fear had been particularly vulnerable to Fun and Joy. That was all. I wouldn’t have even figured that out if it hadn’t been for North and his talk about centres. If I can’t keep myself from hurting other Guardians… what if I hurt one of the kids?

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

It takes me a bit to calm them down, especially Toothiana who thinks she did something to set Jack off. It was easy enough for her to shake the chill Jack had set on her hand. No harm done except, between that and Jack’s outburst at North, it’s clear something’s wrong with the Guardian of Fun. 

Jackie’s probably out there choking on his guilt. I used to think he was a carefree ass, but now I know he’s got no harsher judge than himself. It’ll take some time for him to trust our acceptance. We just have to keep showing him, because he doesn’t believe a word of what you tell him unless you back it up with doing. 

“He’s coming back in,” Tooth calls as she flits into the room. She’d insisted on going out to fetch him herself. It was a good sign that Frostbite hadn’t taken off entirely.

“And then you will be explaining, yes?” North had tried to wheedle more information out of me, but nothing would compel me to break Jack’s confidence. 

“Yeah, just wait a tic.” I can’t be too annoyed. He’s only worried about Jack. With Katherine and Nightlight long gone, North’s had no one to fuss over for ages. It’s not surprising that Jackie would stir up his paternal instincts, looking like he does. The others settle back by the sofa. 

A moment later, Jack glides in and fusses about with the window when I approach. “Frostbite? You comin’ back over?”

When he turns to face me, his haunted expression forces me to clench my hands at my sides, lest I scoop him up for a cuddle and humiliate us both.

“Bunny - what if I hurt one of the kids?” I can hear how fast his heart is beating. How he thinks he’s some sort of corpse I’ll never understand.

“We’ll get it sorted. C’mon Jackie.” Holding out an arm to him, Jack cautiously steps closer until he’s by my side. I let him continue towards the others and follow, resting my hand lightly against the small of his back when he stops just short of the sofa where North and Tooth sit.

“I’m really sorry.” Jack’s apology is directed somewhere around Toothiana’s knees.

“It’s all right. It was an accident. I’m fine, see?” Tooth holds up her hand and wiggles her fingers merrily. Jack peers intently at her hand and then slumps a little, relieved.

“Yes, yes. Everyone is fine, even if some of us remain curiously coloured.” North raises an eyebrow at Jack who smiles weakly. “However, explanations would be most appreciated.”

Explanations. Right.

I nudge Jack towards a chair and he complies readily enough, sitting and looking up at me plaintively. “It’s probably best if you do this yourself.”

“Yeah, I know.” He fidgets a bit and pulls his knees up to his chest. “So, I’m kind of a mess.”

To their credit, none of the Guardians speak, waiting patiently for Jack to gather his thoughts.

“When I met you guys, I’d been around for about three hundred years or so.” There’s a quiet gasp that sounds like it came from Tooth. “Never really had anyone to talk to though. Nobody ever explained anything about spirits or powers to me. I just… was. I saw other spirits once and a while from a distance, but none of them seemed to want anything to do with me. Mostly, I explored my powers and did things with humans, even if they couldn’t see me.”

The others are listening intently. Even Sandy is alert and attentive. Jack used to frost over furniture when we had discussions like these. He’s doing all right at the moment though. I could have dragged him up here earlier, but North was too curious not to have pried, I think. Plus, I’m fairly certain there’s little love lost between Jack and the yeti, even if they patched him up all right after the last big battle. Bloody eager to have him out of here, they were.

“I didn’t remember anything about being a person before,” Jackie continues. “I wasn’t even sure that I’d been human.”

“You have some of your memories back now though,” Tooth interjects softly. She’s still got his tooth box tucked away specially. Not sure when he’ll be ready to face all that again.

“A few, yeah, but my memories… well, they weren’t all great, you know? And then my powers started acting up. If I got too emotional? Boom! Big icy mess. I know I made some pretty big mistakes during the whole Pitch thing too, which I guess makes for more angst to trigger surprise deep freezes.”

“We all made mistakes,” I interject. Sometimes I think Jackie’s got us up on this pedestal and doesn’t quite realize that just because children view us as almost comically all powerful and perfect, doesn’t mean we actually are.

“Not like me,” Jack meets my gaze. “I failed my family and I failed the fairies. I barely pulled it together in time to help with Pitch and that was because of Baby Tooth. The rest was dumb luck.”

Sandy is shaking his head in disagreement, but Jack won’t acknowledge him.

“It’s okay. I’m a Guardian now and I’ll do my best to live up to that honour, I just really don’t think I’m worthy of the title. I’m not a good person. Not like the rest of you.”

“Ha!” The sudden bark of laughter comes from North, who’d been quiet up until now. “Good? Like me?” 

Jack nods hesitantly and North’s brow darkens.

“I was not a good man, Jack.” 

“I know you were some kind of outlaw…”

“No, I don’t think you do.” North stands. His aura would dominate the room even if his height and powerful frame did not. “I was the Bandit King! I led the most daring men, sought out the most dangerous treasures. There was no prize that could escape my grasp, such a thief I was. A swordsman too, terrifying to behold. No one denied me.”

As he crosses the floor, North looks less and less like his merry wonder making self and more and more like the fierce warrior he been when we first met. Santa Claus is believed to be a fat, white bearded bloke these days and North looks the part on the surface. He's actually more muscle than anything and he’s not let those swords of his languish, that’s for sure.

“Oh, I was no murderer,” North concedes, “but do you think I cared for those from whom I stole, Jack? That I felt guilty for their loss or regretted their fear? Did I worry about how they would feed themselves once I had what I wanted?”

“No, I did not.” He stops to stare at Jack, thickly muscled arms crossed tightly. “Was that good? Was I Nice?”

Jack looks up at North stunned, like he’s never really seen the man before. Thing is, Nicholas St. North is a good man. He just had a long road to get there. Easy to forget that sharp edged past of his if you get caught up in his jolly exuberance.

“No, I was very Naughty indeed. But I cannot change the past. It is done,” North states with finality, only a touch of regret threaded through his words. Tooth watches in fascination. I doubt North’s ever really talked about all this with her, despite her own fierce past. Sandy may have heard some of it. I’d known a bit in the beginning, learned more from Ombric, and heard the rest over a couple evenings when the vodka flowed freely after Ombric’s “death”. Now would be a good time for one of his unexplained appearances actually, but how he decides where and when to show up is a mystery to me.

“But… how did you fix it?” The need in Jack’s voice is painfully resonant.

“There is no fixing for some things, Jack.” Sighing, North steps back and sits. “What did I do? I changed. I became better. I worked to be the man I should have been all along. I still do. The future is what we make of it with our choices. So I am Wonder and I am Santa and I will not go back, only forwards.”

“I... ,” Jackie stumbles over his tongue. “I don’t think I have that kind of strength. To be able to just decide that and do it.”

“And you think I did? I would not be here now if not for Manny. He sent me the dream that brought me to Ombric and it was Ombric and Katherine who showed me the choices that lay before me. They helped me to become worthy of being the Guardian of Wonder. They were my family then, like you are all my family now. You are not alone in this Jack and you have much less further to go than I.”

North’s always had a way with that bluster of his and damn if it doesn’t make me want to hug the bastard. Frostbite looks a bit gobsmacked, knees still pressed to his chest and fingers wrapped tightly around his forearms.

“Your choices are what make you worthy, Jack.” Sandy nods along with Toothiana’s words. I hope at least a little of what they’re saying will sink in. 

“Now,” North leans forward, “tell us about your beginning.”

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Holy shit. I knew North was pretty amazing with his swords, what with fighting Pitch and everything, but I guess I’d been thinking a bandit more like Robin Hood than a vicious thieving badass.

“Jack?” They’re all looking at me. Aster’s sitting back on his haunches off to my right, smiling encouragingly. Tooth and Sandy too. North waits and doesn’t seem at all disturbed about revealing his dark past. Not like Santa needs my approval though, is it?

Guess I’d better start with what I remember.

“I was a human boy: Jackson Overland, seventeen. My little sister and I would go skating on a nearby pond. I was pretty good about checking the ice. I checked it the afternoon before and it was still thick and solid, but when we went out that morning… I still don’t understand how quickly it thawed.”

“This was the Burgess pond?” North asks. 

“Yeah.” I try to keep my voice even. “I helped Bekah get her skates on first and she was out on the ice before I could get my feet into mine. We both realized right away when it started to crack. I slid out and used my crook to pull her off the thin ice, but then I skidded forward and ended up there myself.”

Sandy floats a question mark in the air. 

“I fell through.” I wince when my voice catches on the last word. I breathe in through my nose and out my mouth. “The next thing I remember after that, the first thing I could remember before, was being raised up and breaking through the ice, hovering in the air like something was holding me up. I couldn’t see anything else except the trees and the full moon. It was like I could feel the moonlight.”

“When I was set down I found my staff, though I didn’t know it was mine at first. I didn’t remember anything. I picked it up and my powers kicked in. It felt amazing.” That was actually one of my best memories. “It was a little while after that I heard a voice call me Jack Frost.”

There’s an awkward silence where a lot of significantly confused Looks are exchanged, but none of them says anything. I can’t take it for more than a few seconds.

“You sort of know the rest. Jack Frost, snow ball fight instigator extraordinaire.”

Sandy hovers eagerly and illustrates a question that Bunny interprets.

“You didn’t have any dreams or visits when you were Jackson Overland?”

“Not that I can remember,” Sandy looks disappointed, “but I don’t have all my memories back yet.” Please don’t ask me to do that again.

“A dream from the Man in the Moon would have been a powerful memory.” A thoughtful expression crosses Toothiana’s face. “You probably would have seen it already if it was there.” 

“There weren’t any other spirits when you awoke?” I shake my head at North. “Nothing? No strange objects, magic, or machinery?”

“Yeah, not a lot of tech in colonial America, North. I don’t remember anything strange. I wasn’t really looking. Once I found my staff I spent a while figuring out how to frost things and fly. Got a pretty rude shock when I visited town and everyone just walked right through me.” 

“This is not like Manny’s magic. Or Ombric’s. Atlantean?” That last one is directed at Aster. Really, Atlantis?

“Not that I ever saw,” he replies. “All dead now anyways.”

“Seriously?” Bunny was in Atlantis? Aster smirks at me like he always does when something like this comes up. Last time it’d been during a discussion about pets and he said he’d had a Dracopelta once. A freaking dinosaur!

“Usually belief comes first, before a shift,” North strokes his beard. “Also, being near death?”

“Not near - dead.” 

“It does not work that way,” North dismisses me as quickly as Bunny had before.

“That’s what I said.” I get a pointed look from Aster. I guess Not Dead is the consensus.

“If the Man in the Moon knew you existed, why wouldn’t he have told us?” Tooth is clearly upset. “You shouldn’t have had to be alone all that time. Why didn’t I ever see you when I made my rounds? I ran into several other spirits and Nightlight.”

“Oh! The light boy?” I remember him. “I saw him, but he never slowed down. I couldn’t catch him. He was there that time with Sandy and the sleeping girl too.”

They all looked shocked for a moment before Sandy’s symbols begin to flash, filling the room with their brightness.

“You saw them rescuing Katherine?” Aster asks me. “Sandy and Nightlight?”

“Yeah, I guess? It was a bit far off. I saw them shooting up into the sky. When I got there the cave was empty and really creepy.” Like Pitch level creepy.

“Shostakovitch,” North curses softly. “All this time. Manny! What were you thinking, old friend?”

“Am I missing something?” I’m starting to realize how right Aster was. What happened to me was not the usual way of things. The others look back and forth between themselves before Bunny explains.

“That was right in the middle of our first big throw down with Pitch on Earth. None of us were spirits yet. We could have used your help back then, mate. There’s no sense in why Manny wouldn’t have said something at the Lamadary. Or sent a dream later on even.”

The what? Wait. Bunny had said something before about Moon Monks or Lunar Lamas maybe… They used to live on top of a mountain and worked for the Man in the Moon until they’d been scattered during Pitch’s last big grab for power.

“Can you talk to him now? Or dream to him or something?” 

“No,” North sighs heavily. “Not as such. Only Ombric could speak Moonbeam and the Lamadary is gone. The great gong was rescued, but it has not worked since we defeated Pitch the first time.” 

“We barely made it back from the moon after that battle. I’m not sure how much damage was left behind that we didn’t see, but we had to hurry. Tsar Lunar assured us that he’d be fine,” Tooth adds. “We had to get back for the children.”

“You haven’t heard anything from him since? What about a dream message?” Sandy shakes his head sadly. No more dreams?

“Even those have stopped. We are not sure why.” I can tell that not being able to check on the Man in the Moon troubles North. Little gears whirl around Sandy’s head.

“Tsar Lunar used a machine to send the dreams. Might’ve gotten broken,” Bunny adds, like a dream machine is a totally normal thing to have. But if they haven’t been communicating with him…

“How did you know I was supposed to be a Guardian?”

“The crystal. It is underneath the Guardian symbols and can only be activated when all Guardians are present. There were only images. First was the shadow of Pitch, our enemy. Then you appeared above the Guardian crystal.” As North explains, Sandy illustrates what had happened. Wow. So that’s why they’d been so certain.

“He talked to me before, though. Why wouldn’t he have told me that I was a Guardian?” Why did he leave me alone?

“That would have been before Pitch rose. We were not Guardians yet and I do not think Manny has ever spoken to those on Earth without the gong, certainly not by the time we met him.” This makes less and less sense. It’s starting to feel like the Man in the Moon made me as some sort of back up plan, in case something went wrong, and then forgot about me.

“So you can’t talk to him at all?” That comes out more whiny than I’d intended. Great.

“We cannot. Can Manny speak to us?” North shrugs to indicate his confusion. “We should consult with the Williams.”

“The who?” 

“It’s a family that started in Santoff Clausen. Names all their sons William. They keep our history. They might be able to help or know where we can find the Lamas. Ombric stops by there on the rare occasion that he surfaces,” Aster explains in a supremely unimpressed tone.

“Bunny is only annoyed that Ombric does not visit him.” North pokes at Aster. “Hah! I just realized. I am still youngest!” 

Bunny grins lopsidedly at me. I’m older than North? That’s… kind of neat actually. Guess I’ll be making some new friends soon, all of whom will be named William apparently. Here’s hoping they have a less depressing explanation for my existence and why the Man in the Moon is such a jerk.

A mostly glitter-free yeti appears and makes some sort of announcement that both Tooth and North understand.

“Dinner!”

“We should take a break from this while we eat,” Tooth asserts. “It’s been an eventful evening.”

Sandy is clearly lost in thought, but he nods absently and floats along with Tooth. North grumbles and falls in with her as well. 

My stomach is heavy and cold. It should make me feel better that the Guardians weren’t avoiding me on purpose, but it doesn’t. The anxiousness of not knowing has just transformed into intense regret. If I’d actually met Sandy, or said the right thing to Aster, or somehow met the other Guardians when they were banding together to fight Pitch… Things could have been so different. I know I should let it go, like North said, but it feels like a thousand burrs of “what if?” are stuck under my skin. 

I just want to know why. Three hundred years alone. Stupid Moon.

Aster waits for me at the doorway, head tilted sympathetically because I can’t mask anything right now. Of course, my few hundred years isn’t anything to Bunny’s millennia. I must sound like such a brat to him. 

Well, if I’m going to be this pathetic I’m taking advantage of it. Bunny does this thing when I’m upset, shifting his arms to his sides and smiling just a little when I get close. It’s an open posture and he does it very deliberately. The first time was when I was coming down after a memory related freak out. When he’d done it I’d thrown myself at him. Since then I’ve labeled it his prepared-for-a-hug stance. Aster isn’t really huggy. Tooth is, but her hugs are fast and fleeting. The few times I’ve been hugged by Aster, he’s been focused and solid, if a bit awkward. Plus, he doesn’t let go until I pull back, like he’d be all right with just staying that way for a while. It’s awesome. So I don’t suck it up like I should and instead slide right into the hug.

As soon as his arms close around me the tension in my body flees. The friendly way to hug would probably be to sling my arm over Bunny’s shoulder and follow it with my chin, but ever since the big blow up about my burrow, it’s been like this instead. My arms go around his chest, under his arms, and I press my face into his ruff while he hugs my shoulders. If I curl a little, Aster’s chin settles just on top of my head, which is what I do now. This way I can slide my hands into his fur too. Maybe it’s a tactile thing, from being apart for so long, but I really really love his fur. I would totally meditate just stroking it over and over if I thought he’d let me. 

We haven’t hugged like this for weeks, because I’m not fragile or clingy or ridiculously needy. I’m not. It’s so nice though and… mmm. The pads of Bunny’s fingers are sliding through my hair. My hands take that as a cue to do some petting of their own. I’m so glad he’s not mad. 

I’m not sure how long we linger, but it’s not long enough because a lavender yeti interrupts to harass us into dinner, glitter shedding everywhere in her wake. Aster looks a bit flustered. When we get to the dining room we part. There’s a chair for me between North and Tooth. I decide to leave my staff against the wall, because after what happened earlier, everyone might feel better if I don’t have it handy to point at anybody while we eat.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short Jack point of view for this one. Most other chapters will follow the usual longer POV switching format.

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

I’m pretty sure this is a dream, because everything is melting. The walls are pooling on the floor and oozing away down some hidden drain. Weird.

North had insisted that we stay the night after dinner, a dinner where I managed not to freeze anything solid, and I didn’t have the energy to say no. Tooth had been the only one to escape his determination. The rest of us had been set up in guest rooms. It’s been a while since I slept anywhere that wasn’t in The Warren. I’m not used to a bed that threatens to swallow me whole when I roll into the middle. Must have finally managed to fall asleep.

The rest of the room slips away and yeah, definitely dreaming, because now I’m in the globe room. It’s unnerving. I’ve never been so aware that I’m in a dream before. Everything is muted. Shades of grey and blue dominate the room, sucking all the warmth out of it, and there’s no sound in the dream at all. The Guardian symbols are intact, back to what they’d been when I’d first been “invited” to The Workshop, but the globe is dark and shrouded in ice. The lights are flickering like candles threatened by a breeze. This place is creepy as hell and I’m half waiting for Pitch to slip out of the shadows. I try to brace myself against whatever’s out there, but I don’t have my staff.

Where is my staff?

I always have it. _Always._ Even when I have nightmares I…

Is this even my dream?

Following my thought like it was waiting for a cue, a shaft of moonlight strikes the floor. I have to jump back when it opens up. The pillar that rises is topped with a large crystal, gleaming as it splits the beam, an image forming above it. It’s me. Is this what the Guardians saw? The image hangs in the air for a moment before it begins to twist and change, ropes of frost curling around the body and binding it to the pillar. His hood falls back, revealing a face warped with malice. He looks like some kind of evil twin.

Out of the corner of my eye I see something move. It’s the floor. The silhouettes of the Guardians are coming to life, peeling away from their places and leaping towards the threat. The not-me struggles and curses silently while the Guardian figures advance. Their fingers dig into me and one of them plunges a hand into my chest. 

I think they’re going to rip me apart.

I can’t watch and I try to turn away, but every few steps that I take bring me right back to the damned pillar. I don’t look up though, nope, nope nope. There are pieces of ice hitting the floor and then the not-me’s staff lands in splinters. Breath, Jack. Calm and centred, like Bunny. I sit down heavily and close my eyes, breathing deeply. The moonlight grows brighter in response, reflecting off the walls, aggressively worming its way into my vision. It’s so strong that it bleeds through my eyelids. 

It has to be the Man in the Moon. Why is he showing me this? Is it some kind of punishment? I already know I’m a terrible Guardian. Does he think I’m going to hurt someone?

I curl up with my head in my hands, thankful that there’s no sound in the dream. It feels like forever until it fades and then I’m in bed, alone with the shadows. My own ragged breathing fills the room. Even Pitch couldn’t have done worse than that. 

I don’t think the Man in the Moon likes me much anymore.


	5. Chapter 5

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

The wind is howling when I wake up. The nightmare still lingers in my head, like the moonlight has burned the images into my thoughts. Maybe North has alcohol. I always wanted to know what being drunk would feel like.

That’s probably not a breakfast thing.

I lean a little on my staff and make my way down the hall. Should I tell them about it? Maybe it wasn’t really from Manny? If it was, talking to him isn’t going to go well. He could tell the others to get rid of me and they might listen to him. It’s only been a few months and they only wanted me in the first place because The Man in the Moon said so. 

I check Aster’s room, but he’s not there. Probably just as well. I was going to stop blubbering about everything to him, wasn’t I? Guess I better see who’s up. I wander past the other silent rooms until I reach the staircase, stopping at the top. I can hear North’s voice booming through the halls.

“Is fine, Bunny. I know it was mostly Jack. I cannot imagine you of all people conceiving of such a thing, let alone accomplishing it.” I can hear the teasing lilt in North’s voice as he jibes Aster over the prank. It gets exactly the rise out of Bunny that he intended.

“What? Next time, North, I’ll-” Sadly, whatever threat Aster had been about to lob at North is loudly disrupted by an angry stream of yetish.

“What was that, then?” I don’t have to look to know Bunny’s ears are snapped up tensely. It sure hadn’t sounded good and I had a lot of experience with angry yetis.

“They are complaining about the weather.” The storm. I can actually feel it outside. It’s shaping up to be a pretty big blizzard. The winds have been rattling the windows a little and I can feel the pressure shifting. “It does not matter. We expected such and they have already prepared.”

“You were expecting a blizzard?” Bunny asks incredulously.

“Is typical for Jack, yes.” What?

“What?” Aster echoes my thoughts.

“In the past, whenever Jack has visited, often a blizzard followed. The yeti tell me that the first was the worst storm. There was a great deal of damage. Since then, they are always ready.”

Sandy catches me not-eavesdropping and nudges me from behind. Oops. The dreamsand tickles a bit.

“All right, all right. I’m moving,” I hiss, leaping away from Sandy’s prodding and into view at the top of the staircase.

“Jack! Sandy! Come and eat.” The bannister provides a quick way to descend and I land on the polished stone. Sandy trails lazily behind me.

“You think this is me?” I ask North. “I can’t just whip up blizzards out of nothing.”

“Really?” Does he seriously not believe me?

“I can’t.” I’m a prankster, not a liar. “Even Easter ’68 was just a snow day that other weather systems collided with and turned into something bigger. I’m just not powerful enough for that.”

“You cannot control storm?” North looks dubious. Great. So either I’m incompetent and accidentally creating blizzards or I’m carelessly malicious.

“Look, I’ll try.” The blizzard is growing more powerful. There’s no way I’ll be able to leash it. Opening a window, the howling wind sweeps in and I angle my staff outside. Both hands tight, I concentrate and connect with the storm’s energy. It’s really intense. The cold is profound and when I urge it to disperse it… it does? Huh. The rage of the blizzard fades out and turns to light snowfall.

“Is ok, Jack,” North nods knowingly. “Yeti made preparations, but thank you for winding storm down.”

“No. I - That’s not fair!” I complain, because it totally isn’t. “I didn’t make any storms! All the yeti ever did was yell at me. I didn’t do anything like that. Not even as a screw up. I couldn’t. After you’d ignored me for decades I iced over doors and windows, but never a blizzard!”

“Please, Jack.” North holds out his hands reassuringly, probably remembering my lack of control yesterday. Crap. “Let me explain.”

I draw in a breath and push it out, catching Bunny’s stricken expression. Aw, now he’s worried. North steps forward and gingerly puts an arm around my shoulders. 

“I did not know of your first visit until long after it had happened. I would only be told much later about the winter spirit who had been denied entrance and visited this storm upon us. We did not know your name, only that you had left behind a mighty blizzard that day. Much damage was done and two yeti were killed in the chaos of it.”

“Killed? But-“ North held up a hand, looking serious but not angry. 

“The yetis were most upset. They were quite determined to protect both our work and myself. Whenever you were spotted, they immediately prepared for the worst. Most of the time it seemed that they could mange you easily, ejecting you from the area, but sometimes… Since the first storm there have been a handful more of vicious intensity following your departure. Nothing like it visits us here otherwise. Perhaps you did not intend it as it happened, but you see - the yeti cannot bring themselves to trust you just yet, not completely, despite the obvious changes in your self.”

That has to be a coincidence. I wasn’t accidentally dropping blizzards on The Workshop, was I? No. No way. 

“I never- I didn’t. North, you have to believe me.” I push him back so I can look up at him properly. There’s a painful pause when North doesn’t answer, and then Bunny cuts in.

“Easter ’68? That was an accident, right?” Bunny had actually believed me when I’d told him that.

“Yeah. It was supposed to be a light snow day. It was perfect… right up until it wasn’t. I still don’t get what happened. The whole thing spun out of my control. I was trying to hold on to it when you knocked me down. You remember, right?”

“Yeah, I do,” Aster nods. “Couldn’t hear what you were saying though. I assumed you were like the other winter nasties I’d met over the years.”

“I have no idea how it stopped. It sure as hell wasn’t listening to me.” 

“Perhaps you do not understand the full scope of your powers?” North suggests and Sandy recreates images of the intense cold attack I’d hit Pitch’s Nightmares with last spring. 

“Maybe. It’s not like anyone ever explained it to me.” The icy blast I’d used to fight off the Nightmares had been a surprise. Nothing that powerful had ever come out of me before, but I guess I’d never needed it to.

Sandy’s pictures continue to shift, showing my fall through the ice followed by the little sand me curling up asleep. Then the boy begins to sparkle and float up through the ice.

“He wants to know if it’s possible that you slept through the transformation after falling through the ice.” Aster’s trying to help, but I don’t need the explanation.

“I remember falling through the ice and blacking out. Then waking up as Jack Frost. There’s nothing in between, no feelings or dreams. It was morning when I fell through into the pond and night when I rose. That’s not possible for a human is it?” We’d gone skating when it was light anyway. The details are fuzzy. The moon was definitely full and high when I’d risen.

“Is not likely no, not without magical interference,” North agrees and motions for us to follow him. “Big changes must be accepted by someone, becoming a spirit or shifting into another aspect. This sounds like you did not shift so much as were altered by an outside force.” 

“Could you have resisted your change?” I turn to Aster and he nods, acknowledging the shift he’s talked about a bit. 

“There’s always a choice, Jack.”

“Well, I don’t remember being asked, okay? I never knew any of this was possible until after I became Jack Frost and even then… Are there any other spirits we could ask? Maybe Winter ones?”

“They aren’t the friendliest types, not like you Frostbite. Plus, most of’em don’t like Guardians.” The grimace on Bunny’s face communicates his opinion of winter spirits pretty clearly.

“There are some.” Aster glares at North’s contradiction. “Well, they aren’t so fond of Bunny or Spring, is true. They might talk to you Jack, but yes, generally, not interested in Guardians.” 

“Like who?”

“Well, there have been many, but only a few have lasted or have any real power. I have met Old Man Winter myself, and once the Snow Queen, and have seen creatures such as qiqirn or barbegazi from time to time, of course.” 

“I’ve never seen any of those.” I hadn’t known to look, but I had spent a lot of time in northern countries during the summer months. I must not have been looking in the right places.

“There are others too. Cold, vicious, and mostly associated with death,” Aster adds. So pretty much the opposite of him. If all the other winter spirits hate Bunny, his reaction to meeting me in ’68 makes more sense. “You can’t trust Winter.”

I freeze momentarily, feeling a bit hurt by the generalization.

“Ah, present company excepted, o’course. Yer not- I mean ya-” Aster curses and tugs on his ear in frustration.

“It’s ok, Kangaroo. Chill.” Yeah, I get it. Winter spirits suck. They made an exception for me, because they’d had no choice. Manny hadn’t given them one. Yet.

“We should go to see Williams. Manny did this for a reason.” The room is the same red and gold one from the night before, only now there's a heavy table along one wall piled high with platters of food. North digs right in and Bunny goes over as well, looking a bit dejected. It’s fine. He’d only told me the truth. I kinda liked that Bunny could be brutally honest, even if he did sound like a jerk sometimes. Frostbite is just a nickname. He doesn’t use it because he thinks I’m actually going to hurt anyone with my cold. No, I’m okay with Bunny. I’m more worried about what North is planning.

The Williams. They probably won’t be able to see me, even if I arrive with North and Aster. I'm a stranger to them, and if they’re able to make a connection to the Man in the Moon he can clarify just how the Guardians should be getting rid of me. Great. Exposed like an icicle on the edge of a roof - it’s only a matter of time before something, a strong wind or over warm day, defeats what little connection I have and sends me plunging to the ground. Getting shattered to pieces, torn to pieces like in the dream, is about how it’s going to feel when this whole Guardian thing falls apart.

North and Bunny have taken their plates and settled, while I've been lingering in the doorway with my thoughts. I’m still standing there when the unfamiliar sensation of being watched surprises me. Sandy is floating by the table. He’s focused on me and when Sandy focuses, he doesn’t hold back. 

After a few seconds, he glances over to where Aster is sitting and then back to me. Twice. Question mark? Then he looks pointedly down a little. I’m clutching my staff a bit too tightly and it’s left a small circle of ice on the carpet where it touches.

Fuck. 

I need to think.

“I’m going out.” I cross the room, going around where they’re sitting.

“What?” Bunny twists around sharply. “Jack-“

“I need to think, ok?” I snap at him. “I won’t start any blizzards or anything.” 

“Jackie-” He starts to say something and backs down with a sigh. “See you at home?”

“Yeah.”

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

Jack springs out the window, the frame shaking something fierce as he goes. Bugger. Should have kept my mouth shut about bloody Winter, even if they are a malicious bunch. 

“He does not want to go? The Williams may have answers,” North asks around a mouthful of oladushki. I’m confused too. Jackie was a bit worried how the others might react to his story, but that’s out of the way now. Would have thought he’d be eager to get things sorted. It must have upset him more than I thought, with North going on about blizzards and me making an arse of myself about Winter.

“He just needs some space, mate,” I hope. Frostbite’ll fly himself out of it. Probably. “He’ll come around.”

“Hmm. Well, it would be better to have him near if his powers are unpredictable.” There’s a point. Jack’s gotten anxious about the accidental flare-ups though.

“I’m sure he’ll stay mostly in the north and he’s fine in the Warren. Besides, it’ll be getting cold enough soon that Jack will have plenty of opportunities to vent his energy.”

Sandy snakes a stream of sand between North and I to catch our attention. It builds and forms the shape of the moon, the surface of it dotted with question marks. 

“Yeah. Seems wrong, doesn’t it?”

“What do you mean?” North brushes crumbs out of his beard. 

“Sandy was around during the Golden Age and I knew Tsar Lunar, Manny’s father, long ago. Ever since Jack explained what he thought happened… What Manny’s done doesn’t sit right.”

Sandy nods and begins enacting a small scene, scores of small robots clustering around a growing child.

“Raised by blasted robots, I know.” Even the best of the bots we made then wouldn’t have been the same as flesh and blood caregivers. It was a testament to the royal family that the servants they’d created had done as well as they had. The Tsar Lunar I’d met on the moon had been an intelligent man and so eager to help. One more thing that didn’t fit.

“What are you talking about? Manny is fine." The springs of his chair creak as North leans forward to make his point, gesturing emphatically. "There were the mice and moths too. He was not raised to like some machine. You must remember! When we spoke with him before-“

“He was the nicest bloke I’d ever met, and that was all well and good when he helped us find what we needed ta deal with Pitch. ‘Cept the whole time that was goin’ on, Jackie was wandering around alone with no idea what ta do with himself and Tsar Lunar didn’t tell us anythin’ about it.” And that smarted. Jack hadn't had a relic, but couldn't Manny have spared a a few lamas or yeti to check up on him?

“You don’t think Manny intended for Jack to be alone and hurting?” North's tone falls somewhere between offended and incredulous. The thought had occurred to me, though I'll cop to being somewhat biased on Jack's behalf. Was there a reason for it or had he just not cared on account of having other priorities?

“He didn’t do anything ta help, did he? Focused on the relics and Pitch - what else did he do, or not do, that we don’t know about? Strewth, North, ya haven’t wondered? I’m just saying, we’re missing some information.” 

Sandy nods along with me seriously, the moon scene having bled into an image of Jack’s lake. 

“Like what the hell he was thinking when he made Jack in the first place.” Grumbling and shifting, North’s expression is more annoyed than troubled.

“Bah! Whatever his reasoning, it worked out in the end. Jack has us and he saved the world from Pitch. We should talk to Manny, yes, but the why or how may not be so important. We need to make sure Jack is well now.” And that's North all over, ever in the present.

“I suppose. Whatever happened is done, yeah, but Jackie’s power problems could get a lot worse.” Still wish I knew the why and how of it.

“Perhaps he needs someone who can understand him?” Sandy cocks his head curiously at North’s suggestion.

“Better than us? Who?” The idea of Jack being shuffled off to someone else to take care of raises my hackles right sharply. He hasn't got anyone else. Who's going to know him better?

“Other winter spirits, Bunny.” 

Like hell! A disagreeable snort erupts from me involuntarily. They’d probably only encourage the worst in him. Frostbite’s got enough self worth issues to be dealing with that wretched bunch. Stalking away from the sitting area, my plate clatters when I toss it onto the table. Jackie’s better off sticking with us.

“I know you do not get on with most of them,” North continues unflinchingly. “However, Old Man Winter would surely be safe choice. He has no interest in making trouble. Wouldn’t it be good for Jack to have someone that could understand his nature as a spirit?”

“We’re not that desperate yet,” I retort and thankfully we’re interrupted before North can argue back. A yeti burbles adamantly from the doorway, demanding North’s presence for the Christmas preparations that are ramping up. He puts her off for a moment.

“I must be getting back to work. We will talk about this later,” North points at me. It’s not a request.

“All right, then. Christmas is coming fast though. Don’t want to add to your work load.” And maybe the bastard will be distracted enough by his holiday to forget about this winter spirit business.

“Is important. I will do my best to make time. Ah. Before you go, I have what you asked for.” He motions for me to stay and strides out of the room, already shouting at a yeti down the hall who gamely hollers back. I can only assume that North prefers it to be unnecessarily loud in the Workshop, because it always is. The bonus with building your helpers means you can make choices, like not adding in the ability to talk.

Of course, as soon as he’s gone, Sandy’s right up in my muzzle with his coy question marks.

“What?”

Figure of Jack. Figure of me. Cuddly hugs. 

“Jackie just needs some reassurance, that’s all.”

Raised eyebrow. The figures dissolve. Sand Aster appears in the Warren scene, a Go Away sign staked into the ground next to where he crouches. Sand Jack bounds in, kicks over the sign and flings himself at Sand Aster. Much cuddling ensues.

“Oh fer- What? We’re mates, all right? Jack’s been doing great in The Warren. I’ve been keeping to myself too much. I admit it. But Jack’s pulled all of us out of our ruts. It’s good, isn’t it?”

Sandy nods emphatically.

Sand Aster and Sand Jack separate a little. Sand Aster nuzzles Sand Jack. Sand Jack arches, letting Sand Aster reach his neck and-

“Stop! Just- It’s not like that!”

Sandy’s expression is curiously disbelieving. The figures dissolve into a ticking clock. Not yet, he supposes.

“Crikey,” I sigh. “Look, we’re close and yeah, it’s nice. He’s a pretty bloke and I like having him around, but it’s been a long time Sandy and unlike some I didn’t sleep it all away. I’m not sure I want to go down that road again. Ever. With anyone. Understand?”

Now the dream master just looks sad. Sand Jack reforms, looking just as melancholy.

“When Jack comes into his own, and gets his believers up and his powers properly leashed, he’ll have his pick of partners, all more human than me. More female too, given that’s his likely preference. Even if it isn’t, he doesn’t need someone with my eons of intimacy issues.” No one does.

Sandy shakes his head at me, unconvinced, but he spends most his time immersed in the boundless dreams of humanity. He’s no realist. I like to think of myself as a pragmatic optimist. The hopeful side of me thinks Jack and I could be the best of friends, while the pragmatic side keeps thoughts of anything more firmly quashed. Any sort of romance between us seems about as likely as Frostbite giving up his crook and learning to wear shoes.

I do like having Jackie close. More than I should really. He’s got too much to worry about right now to be dealing with my muddled up feelings. Besides, I doubt he’d be entirely thrilled by my thoughts on the matter. I’ll not have him feeling obligated. As lovely as he is, Jack’s teasing and friendly affection are only mine owing to circumstance. He doesn’t mean anything by it. These unruly emotions will settle down soon anyway and I’ll be back to where I was before. 

When North returns with a bundle for me, I escape, reeling off my goodbyes and dropping down into the tunnel. 

Sprinting back to the Warren feels good. I stretch myself with a run around the borders before stopping at the vegetable garden. Jack might be back tonight or tomorrow, and might not even join me for dinner then, but I’d rather plan as though he will. 

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

The Wind pulls me up and flings me through the sky. Flying around the Pole’s got to be pretty safe. Not many things to hurt up here if my powers go haywire again.

If. More like when.

None of the Guardians know how to help. These William guys? They might have some idea about what’s happening, but it means talking to the Man in the Moon. If the dream was from him it can’t mean anything good. I might just be better off not knowing. I can find another way to learn control. Maybe get more serious about meditating or just stay in The Warren when I’m not supposed to be bringing snow and fun times. Being there helps when nothing else does. The last thing I want to do is make more trouble for the others. They actually think I’ll be a good Guardian. They’ll probably even help me with believers.

I never had any friends that I could remember before, but I watched people. I know a bit about what it’s supposed to be like. The friends I’ve seen, even the best friends, don’t do things quite the way Bunny and I do though. Certainly not with so much touching. That’s more like parents with small kids or… couples. 

Do spirits fall in love? Do they have sex? Or is wanting those things just one more way that I’m an aberration?

Not that Bunny’d think of me like that. Ever. Like a Dad, though? He’s way older than me, but I’m no kid. If he felt that way he’d be more like North I think, with his “talks”. Aster doesn’t try to tell me what to do and he’s not overprotective either. He’s just there for me. I don’t know. Guess it could be a Pooka thing, though he’s hardly been a Pooka, or around any Pooka, since almost forever. He says things feel different since he became The Easter Bunny too. Maybe Pooka stuff isn’t as big a deal anymore? Aster’s pretty unique.

I do like the petting. I like all the touching actually. It’s not like it never occurred to me before. I wondered how soft he’d be or what the markings meant or if he’d like his fur brushed. Before he knew about me living in the winter burrow, I watched him a lot. 

Way too much, honestly. 

It freaked me out a bit. Especially the time I almost tried meeting him again. I’d hardly even known him and somehow he mattered to me. A lot. I thought I’d gotten over some of that until Pitch’s speech about making the Guardians fade away nearly talked me into a panic attack. No believers meant no Easter and no Warren, no home and no Bunny. I wanted my memories back, but I’d have helped them anyway. I almost gave up after I let Pitch trick me and ruin Easter. I didn’t even want the memories anymore after that. Baby Tooth saved me from myself.

Once I realized how much time I spent borderline pining over Bunny, I went back to watching humans. I watched a lot of people over the years. I didn’t go inside much, because it seemed really creepy to go into people’s houses, but sometimes... I like seeing families and couples. You’d think it would make things worse, but when I’m feeling lonely it helps. Seeing people who love one another and take care of each other makes me kind of… hopeful. There are good things out there, even if they aren’t mine. 

And Winter festivals? So awesome. The Quebec Carnival and Sapporo Festival are my favourites. People always have fun and actually enjoy winter for a change. It’s better than seeing people freeze to death or get hurt because of the weather anyway. Maybe that’s why so many winter spirits aren’t friendly. Winter itself is harder and colder and darker than other seasons. If I didn’t get to do anything except watch people die in avalanches, freeze to death, get lost in snowstorms, or suffer hypothermia? I’d probably be more detached and cold too. What do those other spirits do anyway? Don’t they have any fun?

It’s getting dark already here. This far north I shouldn’t be surprised. No auroras tonight, but the stars are coming out. I should drag Bunny up sometime and get him to tell me about the ones he’s visited. 

I look around and, wow, I haven’t been paying any attention at all to where the Wind is taking me. I’m drifting over Baffin Island. Better drop down and knock for a tunnel, otherwise I’ll be flying way further south to get to one of the few fixed entrance points. Hopefully, Bunny’s already home. When he’s in the Warren he can recognize when I knock directly on the ground and the passages he forms for me are pretty short to walk. 

Looking below for a good landing spot, I catch sight of something on the tundra. Is that a wolf? Aww, it’s a dog. A bald dog. Crap. Where did it come from? It’s going to freeze to death out here.

I land quietly and am kinda at a loss as to what to do next. There aren’t any people for at least a day’s walk from here, even if I could get their attention. Whether an animal can see me has always been hit and miss. Dogs usually don’t, but sometimes wolves do. Polar bears, but they’re never friendly. Penguins are more fun. For a long time it was only the occasional attentive cat that would see me and actually come over to investigate. Whenever I ran into one of those I’d hang around that area for a while. I couldn’t really keep a pet if I couldn’t reliably feed it. Always made sure they found their way to a good home though, somewhere with a proper winter season. I discovered a calico cat during a cold snap in North Carolina once and relocated her in Duluth. Not exactly the nicest thing to do to a cat owner, but Patches didn’t seem to mind too much.

I’ve never been very good with dogs though.

“Hey there.” Apparently it can see me, because the dog startles, turning and scrambling skittishly back. “It’s ok. I’m not going to hurt you.”

Wow. It’s hardly got any hair and looks like it’s desperate for a feeding. Can’t tell if it’s male or female. It doesn’t seem to like noises, so I put down my staff and crouch low, murmuring softly to it.

“It’s ok. Come on. Let me help.” The dog slowly inches closer. Poor thing. Maybe I can get Aster to help me take care of it? Not that he’s a big fan of dogs…

The dog is almost close enough to touch when the moon emerges from behind the clouds. Moonlight strikes down hard on the snow-covered ground making it glitter brightly. The dog yelps in shock and stumbles backwards. 

“Whoa. Hey!” It’s no use though. The dog dashes off into the night and is gone in seconds. “Awww, really?”

The moon hangs in innocently in the sky. Jerk. Enough of this. I’m going home. After a few raps against the ground a tunnel opens. Bunny must have been waiting for me. I trudge down the tunnel and yup, Aster is in the clearing that it opens onto, sitting on large stone. 

“Jack.”

“Aster.” Bunny recoils a little at my surly tone. Damn. “Ah, Sorry. I’m not really good for talking right now. Sorry for ditching you earlier too.”

“You needed your space. I’m sorry too, for the winter thing.” 

“Um, sure.” I’m not sure why he’s apologizing, but okay. 

“You want something to eat?” 

“It’s kinda late.” I shrug. “I thought I’d just go back to my- back to the winter burrow.”

“Listen Jack,” Aster steps closer when I go to walk past him. “Whatever happened before doesn’t really matter. We’re together now. You don’t have to do this alone. We’ll get you sorted, however you like. All right?”

See, this is the problem, because he says things like this and I can’t- I just… When I meet his eyes I just about crack, because while the Man in the Moon may have it out for me, Aster’s been nothing but unendingly supportive since we dealt with Pitch. I really, really don’t want to melt into a puddle at his feet, but it’s so hard. 

“C’mon,” he holds out an arm. I give in and slump against him. “I’ll walk you home.”

“Thanks, Bunny,” I mumble into his fur. 

“No worries, mate.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I woke up yesterday morning to “Yay! It’s snowing! Yay! Yay!” and so Jack was chattering in my head all day. Took a bit to get back into Aster’s POV and finish things up. Behold, a new chapter.

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

I love Halloween. Is there a Halloween spirit? I didn’t see anybody last week, but that’s nothing new. Never saw anyone before either. I should ask the others, because anyone who oversees a holiday like Halloween must be fun. 

Watching Jamie and his friends go trick or treating this year had been a blast. Well, mostly watching. I may have helped out with the trick part, getting pink toilet paper wrapped around the top of the Thaddeus Burgess statue for Pippa and Cupcake. Jamie had been busy trying to calm Monty down after a zombie-costumed neighbour leaped out at them in fun, Claude and Caleb scrambling to rescue the dropped candy. All the kids had happily fed us their unwanted treats. Bunny’s ruined me for chocolate, those tiny candy bars are awful, and the kids were equally disgusted by licorice. I don't mind it, but the red ones? That wasn't anything like licorice at all. Baby Tooth loves the stuff. I’ll hear about that from Toothiana for sure. Oh well. It was fun, though I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy it if Sandy hadn’t tagged along. I knew that if anything happened with my powers he’d help. 

Nothing did though. Not even any frost. 

I still don’t understand about the blizzards at the Workshop. North and Bunny are all prepared to hop off to wherever it is that these Williams live and I’m running out of excuses. It’s only going to confirm what I know already. I wasn’t supposed to be a Guardian at all. Not that it can be changed now, I guess, but… I don’t want to face that, hearing him say it flat out. The Man in the Moon can suck it. I’m doing okay.

I meditate every day now. Sometimes alone and sometimes with Bunny. Aster is helpful and distracting at the same time. I get centred into a normal calm place and then a few minutes later a stray thought about the shape of his arms turns me inside out. I don’t know what I’m doing. This isn’t just about friendship anymore, not for me. Unfortunately, I’m pretty sure Aster’s slotted me into a cuddly little brother role.

It’d never work anyway.

Sighing, I loop around Burgess. The slightly warm weather of the past week has turned jack-o-lanterns sad and soggy on the curbs. It’s getting colder though and the trees are swaying in the wind. I have a little time before it’s completely dark and I can meet up with Sandy. We’ve been hanging out a bit since the Guardian meeting, mostly in more northern cities, but tonight I wanted to check in here. I promised Jamie I’d do my best to get a little snow in before Thanksgiving. If the temperature drops another few degrees, I might be able to frost a few windows in the early hours of the morning.

I tug at the wind to take me down lower. I’ve been watching people again, and probably not doing myself any favours by focusing on couples. Landing on a balcony, I press my nose to the sliding door and peer through the blinds. The things I think about, the things I want… I guess I’ve been trying to figure out if it’s normal. The more I watch the more I’m beginning to think it doesn’t matter. People do wonderful or horrible things to each other and it doesn’t seem to make a difference what they look like or who they’re with. I followed one super cuddly pair home only to watch him beat the crap out of her half an hour later. Another couple yelled at each other over something I can’t even remember and then, well… they made just as much noise making up as they had fighting. Passionate. That’s what they’d been. Which had only brought me back to thinking about Aster and his outbursts and wondering what might happen if I found just the right buttons to push.

Boomerangs most likely.

The air around the balcony stills as I watch the two men inside. Steve and James. They’re sitting on a couch watching TV. They aren’t wrapped up in each other like I’ve seen them before or arguing about how to put together the bookshelves or trying to get their ageing dog to take his pills. Tonight they lean together, pressed side to side, sharing a bowl of popcorn while they relax. Comfortable and happy. This is what I want. I’m almost certain. I’ve been drawn back here enough times to-

“Oh.” The golden light reflected in the window ruins my view and I catch sight of the dreamsand that threads through the sky. The wind blusters violently for a minute and then flaps itself out as Sandy floats down to meet me. 

“Heya, Sandy.” Hopping onto the glittering pillow, the squishy sensation between my toes reminds me of the sort of dry, crumbly snow that's useless for making anything. He takes us back up, almost as high as the ceiling formed by the cloud cover. The city below is quieter from here.

Sandy waves his hands a little and more tendrils sprout off, then he turns to me and starts. Thankfully, I’ve gotten better with the image translations.

First, he asks how I am and if I’m having fun, using a little sand me that acts out the options.

“I’m good, Sandy.”

A window. Sand Jack is peeking through the blinds. Oh. He saw that?

“Umm, yeah. Just watching TV. Keeping up to date. You know?”

Sandy doesn’t seem convinced. His brow pinches a little. An image of Aster forms in the air with a question mark.

“Oh Bunny’s good. Everything’s good.”

Now he looks annoyed. Sand Aster is joined by Sand Jack and an emphatic arrow points back and forth between them.

“Oh! Me and Bunny are good too. No fighting or icy accidents. I’ve been getting out more. That way I don’t get on his nerves too much. Bunny likes his space.”

Face Palm. The sand figures sag and disintegrate.

Huh?

“Everything okay, Sandy?” The Sandman’s shoulders heave in a silent sigh and he waves his hand to indicate that he’s fine.

“I wanted to ask you something, if that’s okay? It’s about dogs.” Actually, I had been going to ask Bunny or North about the bald dog from before, but couldn’t bring myself to do it because the conversation might come back around to the Man in the Moon. “So, I saw this dog on Baffin Island.”

Sandy creates an image of a heavily furred dog, not far removed from a wolf. I’ve seen lots of them up north.

“No.” The one I’d found hadn’t looked like any dog breed I’d ever come across. Since it had seen me right off, and been scared of the moonlight, I’d wondered if it wasn’t a real dog at all. “It was practically bald, more like-“

Sandy’s image blurs and forms into a scarily accurate copy of the dog I’d seen. It’s uncanny.

“Wow. How did you know?”

The bald dog image quivers a little when the image of a man approaches, then suddenly the man jerks and begins to convulse, collapsing down. The dog prances skittishly, then darts away. 

“So it was a spirit animal!” Sandy nods seriously. “Does it kill people?”

Sandy raises his hand and tilts it back and forth. Sort of. What it did to the man… If that happened out on the tundra and someone fell unconscious, they could freeze to death. 

“But it couldn’t hurt me?” The shrug and shake of his head communicate Sandy’s lack of knowledge there. 

“It’s a winter spirit, isn’t it?” Out on the tundra like that, it must be.

Tentative nod. 

“Of course it is,” I sigh. “Does it ever help people?”

Sympathetic shake of the head.

“Are there any helpful winter spirits?” The nasty winter spirit theme is getting really depressing.

Sandy blinks at me and stalls. Great. Then he bobs up and down for a moment and begins to form shapes.

A woman with long hair in robes, maybe a kimono? – shatters into jagged ice

A tall man with rough rocky skin – shatters into jagged ice

A small man with big feet – sparkles and bursts into snowflakes

“So the little guy was a good one, but not the first two?” Sandy nods. “Okay. Any others?”

Large man, shifts to old man – explodes into a blizzard

“Okay, ummm... Powerful and neutral?” There’s that tilty hand again. “You aren’t totally sure. Wait. Was that the Old Man Winter that North mentioned?”

Nod. 

“Huh. Maybe I should try talking to him like North suggested.” It’s a better option than Manny as far as I’m concerned. “Aster really doesn’t like winter though, does he?”

Sandy rolls his eyes at me and huffs. A dreamsand Jack flits into being, spins around, and throws out his arms in a little ta-daa pose.

“Yeah, okay,” I try and smother my grin. “Bunny likes me, just not winter generally.”

Pointing his hand index finger out, thumb up, he shoots at me with a grin. Bingo.

“All right,” I tuck the spirit information away for later. “So, anything interesting happening tonight in dreamland?”

Sandy waggles his eyebrows and the pillow we’re on surges sideways to move west, following the night sky as the earth turns. The beautiful dream creations that emerge include the usual animals and adventures, and one spectacular dream about a spaceship blasting off in a burst of sandy flames. Awesome. I want to stay all night, floating through the time zones, but less than an hour after we leave Burgess I feel a sudden and unrelenting need to go back.

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

Settled in by the fire, it’s been ages since I worked with a needle and thread. Don’t need much myself in the way of tailoring. It’s a good change, even if the subject is nearly the same. I’ve been filling too many sketchbook pages with images of Jack. Most are drawn from memory, but a couple times I’ve watched him when he’s been sleeping. He dozes off in the evenings sometimes after dinner. I should ask, I know, but studying him from afar is a safer option. Asking Jack to pose will only beget more blasted teasing, the last thing I need.

It’s bad enough the way he’s constantly creeping into my thoughts. Like when I try to suss out the colour of his hair. Most would be pleased enough by comparing it to snow, but the shade’s always seemed a bit off to me. It’s not crisp white like freshly laid frost, or that odd white-blue shade of thick glacial ice. There’s a touch of grey and the colour can’t seem to make up its mind whether it wants to be warm or cool, like moonlight on a clear night. And then there are his eyes…

“Bunny? Have you heard a word that I have said?” North demands. He’s working on his own surprise for Jack, so I’ve come up to collaborate while he’s got a few minutes to spare from orchestrating Christmas.

“Ah, yeah, mate. The jacket’s a good choice, definitely better than a cloak. Jackie might rather have something more modern to fit in with the kiddies.”

“This is what I was thinking as well.” We’d both noticed the degrading state of Jack’s clothing and figured on gifting him something new for Christmas. I’m making pants and a shirt at least, and maybe a belt or some such for carrying things. No point in socks or boots, as he’ll never wear them. North peers over at my work. “The shirt you are making has no collar?”

“Nah, more loose. The linen you gave me is perfect for it. Don’t want it to blow around too much, but Frostbite leaps about like a bloody gymnast so he needs some give.”

“Hmmm. Perhaps I will have the jacket only close over his chest then.”

“Sounds sensible. I’m leaving a little room in the pants and having them button along the seam on his calves.”

“Not full length?”

“Can you picture Jack with full length pants and shoes?” North laughs. “He’d lose the footwear in under an hour and the hems would be ragged within a week. No sense wasting time there.”

“Fair enough,” he nods, and then motions for a yeti to take away the dummy that the jacket pieces are pinned to. “Jack is still avoiding our trip, isn’t he?”

“Hrm.” I haven’t prodded him too much, but North’s right. Jack’s been dancing around it for weeks. Wish he’d just come out and say why.

“How have his powers been?” North sinks into a chair and reaches for a cookie.

“Not too bad actually. It could be a passing thing, but…”

“But?” he prods when I pause too long.

“I don’t know. I’ve rarely seen it happen myself, except for up here at the meeting. Jack is always telling me after the fact.” I shouldn’t complain. Frostbite trusts me enough to confide in me even when he thinks I’ll get aggro over it. Still, if I had more experience seeing it, maybe I’d get a better idea what of what’s going on.

“Hmmm,” North strokes his beard, which no longer shows any traces of our prank. “His power is connected to his staff, yes? Can he function without it?”

“Little bit. If you ask him, he’ll say he can’t do much without it, but when Pitch cornered him on Easter he broke the staff clean in half. Jack forged it back together through sheer force of will.”

“He told you this?” North asks. Jack hasn’t explained to the other Guardians about what had gone on between him and Pitch in Antarctica. It’s a bit of a sensitive point.

“In a round about way. Baby Tooth filled in the rest. She was there.” Thank the stars. She’d spurred Jack to pull himself together. Not sure what would have happened otherwise. “After he got some of his memories back, he knew the staff had been his father’s, not just some random stick he’d found.”

“But it wasn’t until he picked it up that his powers showed themselves.” North closes his eyes in thought. “It is puzzling. Perhaps, is all in his head?”

“Psychological like? It’s possible.” More than possible, as that’s exactly what happened after he overloaded on memories in the winter burrow. The hair trigger on his powers had faded though and he hadn’t gone off in the Warren in months.

“Hmmm.” North opens his eyes and sheds his deeper thoughts like a dog shaking off water. “I must be getting back, Bunny. Please, do your best to convince Jack about the Williams? I have sent messages and they are eager to meet him.”

“Yeah, all right. I’ll give it another go.” I begin folding away the shirt. I’ll have to figure out a way to bring the subject up without making Frostbite feel pushed into things.

“Good. I must get back to Christmas. I may have an idea for getting our Jack more believers.” North’s off hand comment as he’s leaving stops me short.

“Really?” I ask, rising with my bag.

“Yes. I will speak more on it when I am sure it will work.” North doesn’t stop moving, he just swivels and walks backwards, shooing me back down with his hands. “No, no. Stay if you like.”

“Thanks, but no. I’ve got chocolate that needs doing.”

“Oh ho!” Now he’s paused in the doorway. “Is this early Easter planning or are you experimenting again?”

“Little of both. Can’t hurt anyway. Would have helped to have some on hand last Easter, yeah?”

“Ha! Indeed it would have. I look forward to this,” North grins broadly. “You must let me watch when you show Jack.”

“We’ll see.” He’s gone then, off to his holiday planning. Least he’s not as watchful as Sandy. There’s a conversation I’d rather avoid. I make one quick sweep to be sure I’ve gotten everything and then stomp soundly on the hardwood floor for a portal. I’ve dropped down and dashed halfway along the length of it before I sense the tunnel seal shut.

Jackie’s out with Sandy tonight, so it’ll be quiet. Just as well. Since that lingering hug at the meeting it’s been harder to keep my hands in line. Bloody things have developed a mind of their own, running through his hair or sliding along his back. Pretty sure they’d drift off to other places if I didn’t keep a close watch on them. Thankfully Jack’s been meditating on his own at times, giving me some breathing room. He was on to something about passionate emotions before. Damned feelings making me want things I can’t have. I won’t deny him comfort though, even if it means I have to tie my errant hands behind my back.

Best put them to work, I reckon. I drop my bag in the sitting room and head down to the chocolaterie.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

I haven’t flown this fast since last Easter. When I get closer I can sense Jamie calling. Sandy was a bit concerned, but he understands how important the kids are to me, and not just because they’re my believers. I mean, that’s a part of it, but they don’t just believe I exist. They actually like me and trust me. It means a lot.

“Jack! Jack!” Jamie is pacing anxiously by his window. “Jack!

“Jamie, I’m here.” I set down on the ledge and shoo the wind away. Jamie is barefoot in his pjs. I’d better not give him a chill. “What’s the matter?”

“Something’s happened.” He waves me inside and closes the window with a shiver. “We have to be quiet so my mom doesn’t hear.”

Jamie flops down on his bed. I knock the telescope over against the wall and sit on the window seat. I don’t want to risk a flash freeze anywhere near him or I’d be over there in a second. He looks like he could use a hug.

“There was an accident,” he starts. The hair on the back of my neck stands on end and I drop my staff on the floor. So much for keeping my distance. It’s two steps before I’m hovering, checking him over anxiously.

“Did you get hurt? Are you okay? Of course, you are. You’re here. What about Sophie? Or the others? Do you need help?” Jamie grabs my hands and makes me sit.

“It’s okay, Jack. We’re okay. Sophie’s fine. It’s Claude and Caleb’s dad. He’s still in the hospital and hasn’t woken up yet.”

“The boys-“

“The guys are mostly ok and their mom broke her arm,” Jamie reassures me and I feel a twinge of guilt that I’m not the one comforting him.

“What happened?” I ask, pulling my hands back. 

“They were driving down one of the back roads and the car hit some black ice. They slammed into a tree.”

“What? It’s not even cold enough for ice tonight, let alone the past few days.” I cross back to look out the window, picking my staff up on the way. “Are you sure it was ice? I'm not even frosting things yet.”

“I know! I know it’s not you. It was just a freak weather thing, right?” His small hands are fisted in his duvet. He’s bracing himself for something. I find myself doing the same, gripping my crook tightly.

“But?” Jamie’s mouth twists into a frown. “There’s a but, isn’t there?”

“Claude and Caleb they… they don’t believe anymore.” Jamie’s voice is quiet but he’s obviously upset. My chest lurches like I’ve been kicked. I’ve lost two believers? Jamie bounces on the bed in frustration.

“I can’t even get them to talk about it! I know they’re upset because of their Dad but-," he deflates little. “They laughed at me. Like they used to before about Bigfoot and stuff. They won’t listen to Pippa or Cupcake or Monty either, not that Monty will even try.”

I can’t blame the other kids. It isn’t their duty to protect me. Poor Monty is usually terrified of conflict and I can imagine how Cupcake would have flown off the handle trying to argue with them. If they don’t believe in me anymore though, I won’t be able to talk to them myself. What am I going to do?

“Caleb’s starting to doubt the other Guardians too and Claude said if you really existed, the accident wouldn’t have happened,” Jamie doesn’t meet my eyes after that statement.

I wish that were true. I can’t be everywhere at once, even if I am in Burgess a lot, and my powers have been… No. It wasn’t me. It couldn’t have been. Just like the blizzards at the Workshop weren’t my fault either. Were they?

“Jack?” Jamie’s face is desperately hopeful in the dim light. “You can fix it, can’t you?”

“I- I don’t know.” I slump down onto the window seat. I don’t know what to do. I’m losing believers. A handful of kids and I can’t even manage- 

A loud crack behind me derails my thoughts. I look over my shoulder just in time to see the window succumb to the frozen cracks in the glass and shatter out of the frame completely. The shards fly into the room with a blast cold air, scattering over the frosted window seat and beyond.

“Ahh!” Jamie cries out, retreating back up his bed. “Jack!”

Oh God. I knew it. I knew this would happen! Jump out of the window and into the wind. I shouldn’t have come by myself. I shouldn’t have risked hurting Jamie! 

“Wind!” I scream and plummet down, flying east of the lake to where there’s fixed a tunnel to the Warren. 

Please be there, Bunny.


	7. Chapter 7

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

“Don’t touch me!” Aster flinches backwards after I come tumbling down the shaft. “Just don’t.”

“Jack-“ 

“I need to talk the other winter spirits.” They might be the only ones who can help me.

“Jackie, I-“ 

“Please, Bunny,” I plead with him. “I need your help with it. I can’t go on like this.”

“All right,” Aster relents, choking back whatever he was going to say. He’s wearing an apron that doesn’t have a speck of paint on it. He must have been in the chocolaterie. “Are you okay?” 

“No Williams. No one human. At all.” With winter spirits, I might not be able to hurt them. At least, I hope not.

“Strewth, what happened?” he asks seriously. Probably remembering what I did to the oak.

“What always happens. I lost control again with my powers.” Like it isn’t obvious. Aster doesn’t look even a bit surprised.

“Frostbi-“ 

“Stop calling me that!” I snap. I fucking hate that name so much right now. “I almost hurt Jamie tonight.”

“Aw Jack.” Bunny reaches out to me and I evade him. He sighs and settles down on a rock, patting the space next to him. “Tell me what happened.”

My stomach is full of wriggling doubts but I plant my staff and perch on top of it. Bunny doesn’t ask me again. He just waits and waits until I get my troubled thoughts into order. 

“I had this urge when I was out. Jamie wanted to see me. I can kind of sense that you know? Sandy was busy and I thought I’d be fine.” But I wasn’t. Stupid. I should have at least stayed farther away or had him meet me outside. What if Sophie had been there and grabbed me? I didn’t even check if the glass had cut Jamie before I left and they’re going to have to find the money for a new window too. I’m a great Guardian of Childhood all right.

“But something happened?” The prompt interrupts the tangent my thoughts have run off on.

“Yeah. There was an accident.” Aster looks alarmed. “The kids are okay. Don’t worry, but Claude and Caleb’s Dad was pretty badly injured.”

“Was Jamie upset? Is that what…?”

“No. I mean, sort of.” He looks perplexed. Bunny tries to understand, but the flare-ups don’t make any sense, I know. It’s usually because I’m emotionally worked up about something, but not always. “The twins don’t believe anymore. Not in me, maybe not in any of the Guardians. Jamie was freaked out and he wanted me to fix it. All I could do was worry about losing believers and being such an awful Guardian that-“

“Jackie, yer not a bad Guardian." There’s a trace of exasperation in his tone. Aster is way too optimistic.

“I am. I totally am,” I mumble, but I know Bunny catches the words by the twitch of his ears. “The accident was because of ice, Bunny. Ice! What if it _was_ me?”

“It wasn’t.”

“It might have been,” I sag. My whirling anxiety is reducing down into heavy dread in my heart. “North thinks the blizzards were me.”

“North is wrong. Ya said ya didn’t do it and I believe ya.”

“But what if-“ Aster holds up a hand to interrupt me.

“Stop. Were ya even in Burgess around the time it happened?” He looks at me pointedly.

“No.”

“There ya go then,” Bunny states, as if that answers everything. “Breathe, Jack.”

I obey shakily while he takes a moment to remove his apron and fold it aside.

“I still need help, Bunny. Maybe some of the other spirits with winter powers will know what to do?”

“I can’t say I’d recommend it, but if that’s what ya want.” He sounds resigned and not a little stressed. 

“Yeah. Yeah, it is,” I confirm. Damn I’m tired. 

“Come on, cobber.” Aster reaches over and tugs gently on my sleeve. This time I give in and allow myself the comfort he’s offering. I drop down and accept his side hug. “Yer exhausted, aren’t ya? Worrying yourself sick.”

“I’m sorry," I apologize into his shoulder.

“For what?”

“Everything.” 

“Ha,” Aster snorts. “Running the universe, are ya?”

“Shut up.”

“I’ll find out from North about winter spirits mate, but I’m asking Sandy to try Mother Nature too.”

“Mother Nature? Is she real?” She’d be really important wouldn’t she? And why would Sandy know her better than Bunny, who’s practically all about Spring and growth and stuff?

“She’s real.” There’s something sad in Aster’s voice when he answers. “Used ta be a girl by the name of Emily Jane. She prefers staying neutral. Wouldn’t help out with Pitch either time, though I suppose she’s got her reasons. These days, I think Sandy is the only spirit she cares much for, been around about as long.”

“Do you think she’ll know what’s happening to me?”

“It’s worth a shot. Are ya sure you won’t try talking to the Williams family?” He can’t quite keep from sounding hopeful. Sorry, Bunny. I’m not risking it. I shake my head against his arm and he sighs. “Right then. C’mon. Let’s meditate for a bit and we can both unwind. Then I’ll go hit up North for what we need.”

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

Jackie’s nerves are shredded to pieces. Not that mine are much better. I’m troubled that he’s lost believers already and Jack’s terrified of hurting someone. I’m never going to get him to the Williams now, am I? 

We walk through the Warren in silence and settle in the meadow together. Jack leaves his staff off to the side by my bracers and bandolier, shaking his limbs out violently before folding himself down to sit cross-legged. 

I even out my breathing and try to let go of the tension gripping my shoulders. If I can’t wind down Jack won’t either. It’s several minutes before I hear him sigh loudly and even out his breathing too. 

Poor Jackie can’t catch a break these past few weeks. Losing two believers? That puts him down to five now, and most of them are within a couple years giving up childhood belief all together. It’s a bad situation. I push the disheartening thoughts aside and do my best to let everything else fall away.

We stay like that for the better part of an hour before Fros- Jack, breaks the peaceful quiet.

“Aster?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m going to go crash in the winter burrow.” He opens his eyes, tired and beautiful. I’ve spent ages trying to get that shade of blue down.

“All right,” I nod and Jack springs to his feet. I don’t offer to walk with him. Reckon he needs his space right now.

I allow myself another hour of Jack-free blankness before I give in to the inevitable and go check on him. He’s out cold, literally. Curled up clutching his crook, he looks much smaller than he is. I resist the nonsensical urge to find a blanket for him. 

Might as well go back to see North then. Jack’s anxiety is going to send him into a downward spiral and he’ll be back to having panic attacks and nightmares if this keeps on. If talking to Old Man Winter prevents that, I’ll lay out an eight-course dinner in Antarctica and serve him myself.

I should warn Jack about some of the others though, if he’ll listen to me. 

The yeti that opens the door at the Workshop peers behind me suspiciously before slamming it shut after us. He, or possibly she, seems to relax a little and gestures for me to follow. North’s in the upper levels, hashing out the finishing touches on some new electronic plaything I’m sure the ankle biters’ll be thrilled with this year.

“Bunny, you are back. So soon? Not that I am complaining-“ His confusion is understandable. I wasn’t intending to pop up again for another week. Might as well get right to the point.

“Jackie’s lost two believers.” 

“What? How did this happen?” North’s eyebrows have shot up to his hairline and he waves away the others.

I try and explain. The foreboding seriousness that bends North’s brow back down doesn’t suit him.

“This is bad, Bunny. Very bad.”

“I know. Jack is insisting on talking to Old Man Winter, maybe some of the others too.”

“Ah. Well, they are not all so terrible.” Blindly optimistic is what he is.

“Really?” I ask North scornfully. My dislike isn’t completely unjustified. “Name one that you’ve met for the first time and not come away frostbitten?” 

“Hmmf,” he shakes his head. That’s right. Even Old Man Winter was unfriendly and harsh before he realized we Guardians were permanent fixtures. He may have mellowed, but I still don’t trust the others. Especially Morena.

“How do we reach the Old Man then?” The sooner the better, I suppose.

“Well,” and here North launches into a long-winded explanation that I distill down into writing his name in the snow. Politely. With a bit of frippery maybe, like evergreen branches and the like. 

“Got it. Name, symbols, asking nicely, yeah?” 

“Will be good enough, I suppose,” North sighs at my stripped down description of his invitation. “I would come myself, but you know how it is.” 

I nod. The Workshop is humming with energy and activity. Christmas is only a little more than a month away.

“You know, he and the Snow Queen are often together now,” he says thoughtfully. “That would be treat for Jack. She is most beautiful.”

Wonderful. Of course she is. A beautiful, powerful winter spirit that’ll probably greet Jack with open arms. The jealousy that has been pricking at me since Jack demanded to meet the winter spirits himself is clawing its way up my throat. He’s lovely and full of joy and they don’t deserve him. If that joy and sense of fun has been more muted lately, well, how are the likes of them going to help? All cold and dark and destructive, they’ll suck what’s left right out of him if given the chance. He’s safer with in the Warren with me. Or us. The Guardians. I wish he could see it. 

Or maybe I’m just a jealous old codger that can’t bring himself to share. He might be better off knowing his own kind. North thinks so. Doesn’t mean I have to like it though.

“Are you all right, Aster?” North asks, paying far too close attention. 

“I don’t know.” Damn. Didn’t mean to say that. North pats me heavily on the back.

“You have experienced much change, Bunny. More so than the rest of us even. I know you worry for Jack, but you must take care of yourself too. I remember how you were when we first fought Pitch.”

“Yeah, and how was that?”

“Up tight, arrogant, distant, distrustful, and very much obsessed with eggs.” It’s not untrue. That long by myself, I’d gotten a bit over serious with my hobbies.

“You were also very curious and lonely, though you were determined not to show it. Such stoicism,” he teased. North’s fond gibes have softened in the centuries that we’ve known each other. “I used to delight in getting under that fur of yours, until it became far too easy. The shift was hardest for you, I think.”

“Maybe.” It was true that North had hardly noticed his.

“You took to hiding in tunnels again, Bunny,” he chastises me. “I have not said so before, but it worried us greatly. When I went searching for you again-“

“I nearly took your head off. I remember.” It was awful. Nothing but the googies made sense then. I was terrified of going off on the kiddies. Kept my distance for ages. Still mostly do.

“Several decades of almost no contact, until Sandy-“

“Kicked me in the arse?” I grumble.

“I was going to say helped,” North grins. “At least after that you allowed yourself to be dragged out every few years.”

“It’s better now.” Thanks in no small part to Jack. Playing with Sophie in the Warren had been a particular revelation, not to mention this past summer with the Guardian of Fun himself.

“Yes. I know. Only now, I have to compete for your attention with Jack, hmm?” Smart arse.

I try and hide the flush of warmth that overcomes me. Jackie’s gotten to me in a way no one has since I landed here. North could wind me up back in the day, I won’t deny that. Drove me bonkers trying to understand him, but I never felt with him what I do with Jack.

“Unfortunately, Jackie hasn’t been his annoyingly playful self since the meeting. It worries me.“

“We will make things right for him, Bunny,” North slaps me on the shoulder determinedly.

“Yeah. Thanks, mate.”

Renewing my friendship properly with North has come with its own fair share of guilt. While we’d all drifted apart, I’d been the worst. Toothiana had still made her rounds and seen the others from time to time, the same with Sandy, and though North had been increasingly busy, he’d always been open and welcoming for friends. I’d been the surly hermit that had hidden away from everyone without explanation.

I’d been mostly content though, back to being alone. Wasn’t as though I didn’t have the practice. I spent the time developing properly growing googies and paint plants, meditating and trying to find some equilibrium between the varying part Pooka-Human-Rabbit hybrid I’d shifted to. I’m not sure I’d make the same choice now. Besides, I’ve got Jackie in the Warren almost permanently. I’m too used to his teasing companionship to want to give it up. 

Don’t know what I’m going to do when he decides to move on. 

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

I wake up in my burrow with a start. Ugh. Meditating with Aster had been nice. My jangling nerves had needed the break. Unfortunately, once I’d got back here the walls seemed to echo cold and alone more than safe and home.

What am I going to do? I’m down to four believers, five with Sophie. Being a Guardian means I need believers to keep me real. I might fade away without them. I don’t know if there’s a way to detach from being a Guardian after taking the oath though, and no one’s ever brought it up. If things get worse…

The thought builds an ache in me. Being a Guardian was supposed to be my place, my finally belonging somewhere. I don’t want to let that go. Blinking away the threatening tears, I rub at my eyes and leave the burrow. It’s quiet and there’s a sentinel egg stationed in the clearing with a note.

Huh, Aster’s gone to The Workshop. That stirs some hope in me. Bunny’s taking me seriously about the winter spirits. Good. He might have agreed because I was upset, but I really think this will work better. If I can deal with the power thing, I can totally put off the Williams, maybe even for years. At least then the Guardians might like me enough to ignore whatever Manny says against me. Well, I’d better not sit around wallowing in what ifs. 

Popping up topside, I can see that there’s no moon in sight. If Aster’s out conferring with North, I’m going to take advantage of the overcast night and try to find that dog again. 

The air is cleaner this far north and the light snow below drifts along the ground with the breeze. I’ve always liked this part of the arctic. I got to know the people up here a long time ago. I should have maybe paid more attention to the spirits they talked about though, but for a while I was kinda prejudiced about the non-Christian thing, not to mention how different they looked. I think I was clinging to whatever little bit of normal I felt I still had. Things got a lot easier for me once I was able to let that go and be more open minded. 

I get farther inland, crossing the bulk of the island, and can see the mountains rise up in the east. Last time I saw the dog was somewhere near here, with Mittimatalik on the other side of the range. Despite the clouds, there aren’t any flurries falling and I can see fairly well in the twilight since the winter sun hasn’t set just yet. 

When I get closer, I see the spirit dog skulking through the shadows cast by the range. It does look odd, mostly bald with just a few tufts of hair. I have the wind set me down gently and quietly approach it, but the dog must sense me somehow. It makes a wretched sounding yelp before twisting around and dashing away. Not this time!

I leap forward to follow and something catches my arm, pulling me down. When I yank it back I hear a chuckle behind me. Huh?

“You shouldn’t bother. They’re always like that. Qiqirn are easily frightened.” The man speaking Inuktitut next to me is tall and dark. He doesn’t look Inuit though. His warm brown skin is too dark and his eyes look wrong. He’s crossed his arms over his bare chest and is looking me up and down.

“You can see me?” I respond in the same language. I’d learned enough of it to get by over a century ago. 

“Yes,” he smiles, switching to English. “Just as you can see me. I’ve noticed you around before.”

“What? When?”

“Flying mostly. You certainly have fun with it, don’t you? Not very good with nunuk though.” Polar bears. Yeah, that wasn’t fun.

“Those bears have no sense of humour. I’m Jack, by the way. Jack Frost. And you?” I offer my hand to him.

“I’ve got a few names. Tawis is as good as any.” He reaches out, but instead of shaking my hand, he grasps my forearm firmly and then releases it.

“Wow. I haven’t really met many other spirits. You are a spirit right? Are you a winter one too?” Seems like a good guess. He’s standing on the arctic tundra wearing nothing but leather pants. 

“Winter. Night. A few other things,” he side eyes my hoodie and tattered pants. “You have quite the look. Canadian or American?”

“American. You’re not an Inuit spirit though, are you?” The way Tawis speaks sounds pretty modern, but then again, so do I.

“No, but I’ve been here a lot longer than white men have. Long enough to see them trash the place.” Err. Okay. Yeah, I guess native spirits wouldn’t be too happy with colonials. 

“So, I haven’t seen you around, even if you saw me.”

“You’ll have to talk to the old man about that. Believe me, if I’d had a choice-“ Tawis looks at me piercingly again, saying something to himself in one of the native languages I’d never properly learned before he smiles. “Well, we’d have been friends a long time ago.”

“What old man? The Man in the Moon?” Tawis snorts and shakes his head at me. His dark hair is pulled back in a tie and when it slips over his shoulder I realize that it’s much longer than I thought.

“No. I meant Winter himself. You might know him as Old Man Winter.” 

“Old Man Winter is actually _Winter_?” I ask, incredulously. I mean, I know Aster is Spring, but he’s not _Spring_.

“It’s more of an honorary title. Some of us are older than he is, even if he does meddle more. Do you have a title Jack?” he asks. 

“Uh, I’m a Guardian now, so Guardian of Fun.” 

“Fun, eh? Well, let’s do that then.” The smile Tawis gives me is wicked and then the snow on the ground rises up in a whirlwind and flings me into the sky. After a moment of surprise, my delighted whoop breaks the silence of the night. Time to throw some snow!

The wind catches me and I dive back down through the sky to send an arc of wet snow towards him. Tawis doesn’t even move, he just tilts his head slightly and the snow parts around him. Whoa.

Oh, it’s on!

We keep going, exchanging attacks, and it’s the most fun I’ve had in ages! No worrying about hurting someone or being irresponsible. I am relying on the wind a lot while Tawis hardly even moves. He’s amazing. Suddenly, a slab of ice shoots upwards and I scramble back on the wind, floating under an overhang. Ooops. There’s only a slight crunching sound before the cornice above me crashes down on my head. I land in a surprisingly soft heap and have to dig myself out.

Tawis is waiting with a smirk on his face.

“I suppose I should have added trickster to my list of descriptors.” There’s only one way to respond to that. I smack him in the chest with a snowball full of happy snow.

Tawis reels back in shock and barks out a laugh before clapping his hand over his mouth. He can’t help himself though and the giggles begin to break through.

“What,” he begins as the effect fades, “was that?”

“That was concentrated fun.” It’s my turn to smirk now. I fish my staff out of the snow walk over to him, shaking myself off as I go.

“You need try that at court. They could stand to loosen up a bit. Maybe her highness might defrost a little.”

“Court?” What court? Like a court with a judge?

“You really have no idea do you?” he sighs sympathetically.

“Well, it’s not like anybody came by in, oh, the last three hundred years to tell me anything about anything!” I immediately regret my snarkiness. I don’t want to scare him away. 

“Calm down,” he reaches out and musses my hair. “The Old Man will explain I’m sure. You haven’t met him yet?”

“We were going to try calling him soon.” As soon as Aster gets back from North’s, I hope.

“Do that.” Tawis peers at me sharply. “Wait. We?”

“The other Guardians are helping me. Bunny-“ His face twists into a frown when I mention Aster.

“Oh, the Rabbit,” Tawis snarls the words roughly. “Good luck with that.”

“What?”

“You’ll see,” he tosses the reply at me as the snow whips around him and he vanishes. 

Wow. I wonder if I can learn that trick.


	8. Chapter 8

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

Finally! I’m trying not to hover over Bunny’s shoulder. He’d sent me off earlier to fetch the branches we needed to make a good impression, which had meant learning more about conifers than I’d ever wanted to know and boy am I glad Bunny knows how to remove sap from hair. While I was on my sticky errand, Aster had taken a look to see if Jamie was okay. I don’t want to risk going myself. He was lucky to get there and back unnoticed. Sophie wouldn’t have let him go for hours if she’d seen him. Apparently the bedroom window is boarded up, but Jamie is fine. It could have been much worse.

We’ve picked a spot with a good layer of undisturbed snow. It isn’t even really that cold. Aster writes carefully in the hard packed snow with a stripped evergreen branch and whenever he pauses to check his work I continue with my get-Bunny-to-laugh mission. Really laugh. Not one of those learned-to-put-humans-at-ease laughs or odd little huffs that he always does. It’s turning out to be a bit tricky. He likes riddles, but they aren’t especially funny. Puns only get a groan in response and Bunny doesn’t like humour that’s too mean or cutting either. It’s like walking a tightrope to find the right tone, but I’m going to make him laugh if it kills me. 

“Sharks! That’s it Bunny. Do you think we could pull it off in time for Christmas? You could build them a tank.” His ears twitch. “You know the fairies would love one. Can you imagine them fussing over a great white? With so many cute rows of pointy pointy teeth…” 

I attempt to do my best impression of an over eager Toothiana, prying fingers and all. Then I switch to North, acting out him losing his mind when the elves mess with the colours and the candy canes come out hot pink instead of red and white. Curse their pointy heads! 

Bunny’s serious expression cracks, just a little.

“I saw that! That was a gateway smile, Bunny. It’s only a matter of time now,” I tease him and twirl my staff. 

“You keep on hoping, Jackie,” he grins. Yes!

“Uh huh. You and North, you jab at each other a lot, but you’re pretty close, aren’t you?”

“Suppose you could say that. Been through a lot. He was the one who started with the ribbing and teasing, I’ll have you know. Bold, brash and not a little silly when he wanted to be.” Bunny shakes his head. 

“Sounds like fun. I’d have liked to have met that North.” I’d like to have met all of them back then actually. I’m always going to be behind after the time they’ve spent together. 

“Not sure what that North would think of you. He had quite the temper then,” Aster pauses, considering. “You’d have been thick as thieves with Nightlight though. He was the key to defeating Pitch the first time. Always flying somewhere, enjoying himself, but Nightlight took his duty seriously enough when it came to it. Even had a staff of his own.”

“Yeah?” I know I sound wistful. I had once wanted to meet Nightlight more than anything. “Is he still…?”

“Hard to say,” Aster answers roughly and sits back from his work. “Haven’t seen him or Katherine in ages. Wherever or whenever they are, they’re together at least. Ombric rarely shows up and doesn’t talk about it when he does.”

“Whenever?” It’s an odd choice of words.

“Ombric always had a fascination with time, meddling where he should’ve left well alone. Had ta pull his arse out of trouble more than once myself. I finally convince him ta stop and then he goes and turns into bloody Father Time. Figures.” There’s that exasperation again. I think they must have been friends once, but that’s not the most interesting thing Bunny just said.

“You can time travel?” I ask. “I know you’re old, or long lived or whatever, but travelling in time?”

“Used ta. Not anymore.” 

“Is it because you shifted?”

“A bit. Had to do with the relics too. That’s a long tale you should really hear, but maybe not now, yeah?” He’s probably right. “Besides, you can’t change things anyway, you can only really observe.”

No changes… That means that if I go back in time I get to watch my family suffer without being able to do anything about it. Great. Even if Bunny could take me back, it wouldn’t be anything other than emotional torture.

We finish placing the branches on the tundra in silence. North probably would have come himself, if he wasn’t crazy busy with Christmas prep, and that would’ve livened things up. Honestly though, I’m glad it’s just Aster here with me.

“We ready?” I’ve run out of branches.

“Almost. Are you sure, Jack? You need to be careful. Once you bring their attention on yourself, you may get more than you bargained for.” I understand his caution. Bunny doesn’t trust Winter. He’s being a little overprotective though. I haven’t mentioned Tawis to Aster yet, though the smart assed remark the other winter spirit made a couple days ago keeps popping up in my head.

“Yes and I will. I’m not too worried.” Maybe I should say something? “I kind of ran into one already.”

“What? Ya did?” Aster snaps up straight. “When?”

“Umm, a couple days ago, when you went to see North about all this.” I gesture at the prepared summoning.

“Did they give ya their name?” Bunny asks darkly, hands fisted tightly. Crap. Tawis had been kinda awful about “the rabbit”.

“Er, it was an animal spirit. Like a dog. A Qiqirn.” So I’m a coward.

“Hrm,” Aster seems to settle. Yeah, I’ll mention Tawis another time. “Nasty things, those.”

“Sandy said something like that too. It couldn’t hurt me though. It was just a weird dog.” 

“All right. Let’s get this going.” 

It needs one last stroke, which Bunny tells me do with the tip of my staff, because technically I’m making the call. I’m the one requesting help from Old Man Winter, Bunny’s just here for support. I trace a quick stroke through the powder and the writing is complete, snowy curves elegantly framed by evergreen branches. Nothing happens right away. Then the breeze picks up inside the area framed by the greenery, swirling into a tall column. It’s like a snownado, only a bit eerie, because everything else is still calm. 

“Jack Frost.” The spirit that appears through the snow says my name determinedly. I brace myself for, well, anything – annoyance, disappointment, rejection… “My boy, are we finally able to meet?”

“Umm, yes?” A quick burst of air and the snow settles on the ground. Standing there in the circle is an old man, as advertised. He’s wiry and hunched, snow-white hair coarsely covering his weathered skin, which is darker than I’d pictured. I expected he’d be pale like me, but he looks sort of olive-ish. 

“You’re confused. Of course you are. I shouldn’t be surprised. I’ve been wanting to speak with you for centuries.” His voice creaks when he talks. Centuries? Really? A weight I didn’t even know I’d been carrying flutters off my shoulders. 

“You have?” I lean forward but keep myself from stepping into his circle. It doesn’t bind him or anything. I just don’t want to crowd him, or get within arms reach. Just in case. I’d promised Aster to be careful.

Old Man Winter nods wearily, his woollen coat shedding its crust of frost as he moves. I can’t quite tell what colour it is underneath. Purple maybe? The moisture in the air between us condenses into a light fog. 

“I would have done so long before now had I been able.” Old Man Winter’s speech is thick and slow, words rasping out heavily. I didn’t think spirits had to worry so much about aging, but he’s achingly old, like he really feels it instead of just looking it.

“Why didn’t you?” And that came out more plaintive then I would have liked. 

“Not for lack of trying, I assure you,” he sighs. The ground swells up to form a hard packed snowbank for him to sit on. “We’ve watched you from a distance, Jack. It hasn’t been easy, but your… guardian has been very overprotective.”

“My what?” Oh. I think I know what he means. “Do you mean the Man in the Moon?” 

“Yes. He and his moonbeams are very fierce in keeping you separate from the rest of Winter. Quite tireless, in fact.” Bitterness bleeds into his words. I open my mouth and nothing comes out. “But now, things have changed?”

The Man in the Moon kept me isolated and alone on purpose?

“How do you know it was Manny?” Aster injects, having been pretty much ignored so far. “Did he say something to you?”

“He never spoke to us directly,” Old Man Winter looks at him for the first time. He doesn’t seem thrilled by Bunny’s presence. “However, I believe it to be quite obvious.”

“Bunny, the dog, the Qiqirn, was scared off when the moon came out.” Well, the first time anyway. It makes sense. The Man in the Moon doesn’t like me. The nightmare dream I had at the Workshop was proof of that.

“Jack,” Aster looks at me frankly, “it was Qiqirn. I’d have scared the thing off too.”

“There I must agree with Easter, for humans in any case. Surely it couldn’t have harmed Jack?” 

“Hmmm,” Aster grumbles. He’s not convinced about what Manny’s been doing, but he doesn’t know about the dream. If the Man in the Moon really has been making sure I’ve been alone all this time? That’s worse than ignoring me. That’s cruel. What kind of protector of children does shit like that? Just so I’d be ready to be a Guardian when he needed me? 

“It hardly matters now. His influence has clearly waned. Winter can come together. There’s so much I can show you Jack, so many things you don’t know,” Old Man Winter offers earnestly. I’m about to ask him what he means, when Aster interrupts.

“How come Mother Nature wasn’t all put out by Manny’s interference with a whole season? And why didn’t any of the rest of us hear about it?” I can see Old Man Winter grimace at Bunny’s questioning. I don’t think he likes having to explain himself to the Easter Bunny and Aster’s suspicious tone isn’t helping. I scowl at him. I’m the one who’s supposed to be asking the questions.

“As a spirit tied to Spring, you know as well as I do that Mother Nature rarely deigns to involve herself. She seldom gives an audience and largely does as she pleases. However, in Jack’s case, I believed that she was in agreement.”

“And why’s that?” Bunny asks, arms crossed, but Old Man Winter has already turned back to me. Good.

“Was she not the one who transitioned you?” he asks kindly.

“You think it was Mother Nature?” Is that possible?

“Hold on. Why d’ya think-” Aster tries to get another question in but Old Man Winter is back to ignoring him.

“I admit that I assumed that it must have been her, Jack. None of the other winter spirits were involved and very few have such power. Was I wrong?” He peers at me curiously. Aster and I discussed how much I should mention about my sort-of death transformation and my memories. Unfortunately, the fact that I don’t remember shifting, or choosing to become a spirit, is pretty significant.

“I don’t know. I don’t really remember my shift. Mother Nature didn’t- doesn’t talk to me. The Man in the Moon doesn’t either.”

“Oh my boy,” Old Man Winter responds sympathetically, holding out a gnarled hand. “We’ll do right by you.”

“I-“ It’s a nice gesture, but I’m not sure I’m ready for hand holding. “Thanks, but-“

“Just like that?” snaps Bunny, interrupting again. Goddammit Aster. “Ya hardly know him and suddenly yer besties?”

Kangaroo’s got his back up over nothing and he needs to let it go. Old Man Winter’s been totally cool so far. He heaves a rumbling sigh at Aster. He’s probably as annoyed as I am.

“Winter spirits are a close knit group. To have the chance to gain another friend in kind after so long, can you fault our eagerness?” The eyes that bear down on me are the blue-grey of old glacial ice. “You feel it too, don’t you Jack?”

Both of them are looking at me expectantly. What exactly am I supposed to be feeling? Maybe I’m as messed up for a winter spirit as I am for a Guardian? I do want to get to know them, especially if they can help with my powers, but I guess I’ve been warned enough about the cruelty of winter spirits that I’m worried there’s some truth to it. 

Still. I need their help and Old Man Winter has been pretty reassuring.

“Old Man Winter-“ I hesitate. How am I going to explain it?

“You know,” he frowns, thick eyebrows coming together, “I’ve never been particularly fond of that name.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-" Great, I’m already offending him.

“Oh, it wasn’t for you to know, Jack. Unfortunately, there’s only so much that can be done when one’s aspect ages, as I’m sure St. North is aware, and I am very old. My friends call me Father Frost or simply Winter. I would like it very much if you would do the same.”

“Okay. I’ll remember.” Guess I wouldn’t like being called Old Man all the time either. C’mon, Jack. Get this right. “Ummm, so what I really want to know is if you can tell me more about my powers. Please? Lately, they’ve been kind of acting up.”

“Hmmm. Your powers should be a manifestation of your elemental spirit. If you’re having difficulties, I am happy to offer what assistance I can.” Oh, thank God. “If you can show me the problem, perhaps I can help. Or one of the others if your abilities prove closer to theirs.” 

“It’s really unpredictable,” I sigh. “ Maybe I could call you if it happens? I would like to meet the other winter spirits too.”

“Ah. We’re not always a sociable lot, my boy, and don’t often leave our places of power,” Winter explains. Huh. Do most winter spirits not travel much? “However, several of us have gathered at our court. I would be happy to take you to them, Jack, but only you.” 

“What do you mean?” 

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

I snort derisively at that. Call me Father Frost, my boy… manipulative whacker.

“He means I’m not invited, Jackie,” I clarify. “Like we told you before, winter spirits don’t usually play nicely with others.”

“Well now, I think that’s unfair,” Winter interjects, shaking his head and sending snow flying. “We haven’t been treated well by others in the past either. I don’t think our reticence is entirely unjustified.”

“Except some of your lot are all too happy to be leading folk to their death in the cold, aren’t they?” I snap back.

“Aster!” Jack hisses at me. 

“Those days are long past, Spring Hare.” Can’t help rolling my eyes at that title. Winter continues, “Believe it or not, we can change just as others have. Haven’t your yeti friends shed their abominable history? The world is a different place now.”

The world has changed, but I’d rather see proof before believing what he says. Being connected with Spring makes it harder to let my guard down with Winter spirits, though it’s not been as rough going with Jack. He doesn’t feel like the others even if he can get under my skin like nothing else.

This spirit, he’s old as far as most formerly human types go. Changed his look at least once that I know of. North finds him tolerable, but he’ll get on with most anyone once he’s shared a drink or two with them. I think Winter is insufferable, with his “my boy” and painting himself as a misunderstood soul, likely as I’ve seen what he can do. That was long ago, before Jack would even have been born, but I remember. I can only hope Winter’s mellowed over the millennia, because Jackie’s desperate for his help and the overeager gumby is trying to glare a hole through the side of my head for trying to be cautious.

“Perhaps your Guardian friend is right, my boy. It’s too much, expecting you to accept all this with open arms right away.” Oh I’m right again, am I? How magnanimous. My optimism has clearly fled the field. “But getting to know each other… Surely we can find a place to talk and better understand one another?”

“Yeah, that sounds great.” I can sense Jack’s hope as he turns to focus on Old Man Winter again. Hope that this is the beginning of an answer for his current troubles. I bite back a grumble of disapproval. 

“Your lake then?” Jack starts in surprise. And there’s proof the old man really has been keeping tabs on him. Well I don’t like that. “Yes, I know all about it. We could meet there and spend an afternoon together.”

Jackie glances at me for approval, anxious and slightly defiant. I’m not subtle about my misgivings, but I suppose it’s as good an idea as any. He knows his way around and is comfortable there. Old Man Winter probably won’t do Jack any harm, not in a single afternoon anyway. I force myself to nod.

“Okay, let’s do it,” he accepts in a rush. They chatter away and settle on a date. Fros- Jack is gripping his staff less tightly than when we started. Right. This is important to him. Suck it up, you codger. And find something else to call him than Frostbite. No sense in reminding him of his lapse with Jamie, or his potential for harming others. Never should have started using it in the first place.

“I very much look forward to it, my boy.” The juvenile endearment puts me back to grinding my teeth, but then the spirit vanishes the way he came, in an icy whirl. Good riddance.

Jack is chewing his lip, watching the spot where Winter had been.

Be supportive, dammit.

“You did great, Jackie.” 

“You think so?”

“Yeah.”

“Because you weren’t exactly all smiles, Bunny,” he flings an annoyed expression my way. 

“I know him better than you do. A ways back anyway. I know you want to learn more, but being cautious to start is the smart thing to do, mate. Take it slow.”

“I guess so,” Jack concedes. “What about Mother Nature? Do you think he was right?”

“I’m not sure. Even he wasn’t certain. Sandy can get a meeting with her though. Maybe then we’ll get some answers.” Maybe. I’m not aware of her ever spurring someone to shift or change. 

“Maybe. Fuck, nobody knows what to make of me, Bunny.” Jack kicks the snowbank Old Man Winter left behind. “It just gets more and more messed up.”

Bloody oath it does. If we could talk to Tsar Lunar, we’d have things sorted in an afternoon. No sense in agonizing over it though. Not unless the Williams get the gong working.

Preparing for the summoning, I’d worried over Jackie being off on his own with other, more powerful winter spirits and not having handy way out. He may be starting in Burgess with Old Man Winter, but that doesn’t mean they’ll stay there and his wintery advantage won’t work with someone older and more powerful. Jack’ll be caught up like a snowflake in a blizzard. Good thing I've got it sorted.

“C’mere,” I call to him and he walks over begrudgingly. “I want to teach you something. Usually you have to knock and wait on me for tunnels, unless you get to a fixed point right?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“Well, I’m going to teach you how to trigger them yourself, just in case.” The way his eyes go wide makes me glad I thought of it. I should have taught him ages ago, but better now than never. Jack’s earned it, deserves it given that it’s his home too. For now anyway. 

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Bunny has no more clue than I do about everything. I’m half convinced he’s going to start in on visiting the Williams again when he begins talking about tunnels instead. And then I realize what he’s saying. That’s… that’s a big deal, right? Teaching me how to do it myself?

“Wow. Okay,” I smile at him. “Thanks, Bunny.” 

“You’re welcome, Snowflake.” Huh. I like that better than Frostbite, even if it is kind of fluffy for a nickname. “Don’t want you being caught out, just in case. I know you don’t like to hear it-“

“But winter spirits aren’t very nice. I know. I get it. You can stop worrying so much.” Bunny huffs disbelievingly in response and I grin. I am a bit annoyed still, because he’s way too surly and overprotective about Winter, but if I’m honest I kind of like having him worry. 

He really, really doesn’t like winter spirits though. Was that part of the reason Bunny didn’t want me to become a Guardian in the first place? And if I wasn’t a Guardian, could we still be friends? Maybe my powers are off because I’m trying to be something I’m not?

I am a Guardian though. I don’t really care about Winter as a season except to use it make kids happy. Is that what Manny intended for me? To be different? I might actually buy that if the nightmare dream he sent wasn’t so brutal.

Aster takes my hand, pulling me from my thoughts, and motions for me to drop my staff so he can take the other too. I let my crook fall into the snow. Bunny’s fingers have a shorter, coarser fur than the rest of him, and he has four fingers instead of five on each hand. Once we’re clasped together, facing each other squarely, I feel the spark of his magic tingle into my fingers. 

Wow. The energy unfurls in me, tickling across my skin and giving me goose bumps before surging inward. I feel light, literally, like I’m lit up inside. This is awesome. I try to keep the laughter form escaping but it’s hard. Aster just smiles. His eyes are so green right now. Green, green, green…

“The magic of the Warren knows you pretty well. I’ve made a couple of tweaks and it’ll open for you just as it does me. Almost.” He brushes his thumbs across the back of my hands, looking apologetic. “You can’t ever be connected to it the way I am on account of spring and-“

“I get it. You created it. Its magic is your magic, right? Half the time you only need to think about what you want to change and it reacts to you.” Aster blinks in surprise at my understanding. “I have been living there a while, Bunny.”

“S’pose you have,” Bunny raises an amused eyebrow at my sheepish expression. I’d had a long time to figure the Warren out and Aster had filled in most of the gaps just chatting with me this past summer. It’s his sanctuary. I can’t believe he’s giving me the magical equivalent of a skeleton key.

“All right, Jackson Overland. Pay attention.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Delayed on account of pneumonia, Christmas, pneumonia, too many visiting family members and pneumonia with a side of pneumonia. I need a holiday from the bloody holidays. Where is the robot servant I asked for North? Where?!?

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

“Jack, my boy,” Father Frost greets me with a smile when I get to the lake. I’m a bit nervous, but he seems like a good guy. At least Aster isn’t here this time to antagonize him, even if he does mean well.

“Hi!” I skid to a stop, swirls of frost feathering out from where my feet touch the ice. Technically the lake shouldn’t be frozen over yet, but whatever.

He’s wearing the thick purple coat again. It looks stiff and heavy, and he’s hunched like the weight of it is pulling his shoulders down. His aged hands poke out of the furred cuffs. There’s no frost underneath his feet though, because Father Frost’s pants are tucked into the old, weather worn leather boots he’s got on. I’m starting to feel underdressed. 

“May I ask a question?”

“Sure,” I tap my staff a bit anxiously on the ice, not wanting to mess up again. 

“Why is this lake your Place?” he emphasizes the word Place with his gruff accent. Does he think that the lake is my place of power? “I only ask because I wonder why you choose to dwell here so often, instead of moving more northerly.”

“Oh. I was born near here, when I was human.”

“That would explain it,” he nods sagely. “Spirits do often become attached to places of significance in previous lives. Change can be good however. My homeland is far warmer than you might expect and, though I will always think on it fondly, I could not imagine living there.”

Okay. I guess I can see his point, though I don’t exactly live here, even if I visit a lot because of my believers. Mostly I live in the Warren. I’m betting that Father Frost would like that even less, so I don’t say anything.

He looks off in the distance for a moment.

“Thankfully, we appear to be alone. Shall we talk, or would you like to show me the area first?” He was probably checking for Bunny, but Bunny promised he’d stay out of it today. 

“Umm...” Unfortunately, conversation is not one of my strong points. I can talk to the kids pretty easily, but that’s different. “Why don’t we talk while we look around? Can you fly?”

Winters chuckles, “Can I? My first aspect rarely touched the ground. Lead on, my boy.”

Cool. We both spring up into the sky with the same kind of leaping movements, riding the wind. Toothiana’s about the only one I know who can really fly. Baby Tooth tries to keep up with me sometimes, but it’s easier if she rides along. Old Ma- Father Frost isn’t shuffling around now. He’s light on the wind and I’m pretty sure he’s been doing this even longer than I have. If he’d been around when I was learning to master it, I bet I would have eaten a lot less dirt.

We spend some time circling high over town. Winter is curious about how far I’ve travelled and I discuss some of my favourite places. It’s mostly idle chatter, but it gives me a chance to calm a bit and realize that he’s not going to bail if I say the wrong thing.

When I run out of things to say we swoop down towards Burgess. It’s mid-afternoon. The sun hasn’t set yet, but this time of year it hangs low in the sky. A thin layer of snow blankets the ground, the weather cool enough not to melt it away, but it’s powdery and no good for doing anything with. Streams of children are walking home after school, stopping to talk and play. 

“Jaaaaaaack!” I hear someone yell. When I look down I can see Pippa and Monty waving like mad. Aww no. Winter raises an eyebrow at me when I wave back to the kids and fly away towards the other side of the city.

“Do those children know you?” he glides up next to me, his frost-encrusted coat barely flapping in the wind.

“Yeah,” and they’re going to wonder why I’m ignoring them, or maybe they already know about what happened. Jaime would have told them. My believers are going to be pretty upset. 

“They seem friendly. Do you not want to greet them?” he asks and I shake my head. “Is it because of me, Jack? If you prefer-"

“No! It’s not you.” He grumbles at me disbelievingly. “It’s me. I messed up.”

We land on the roof of one of the older brick and stone buildings. The expression on Father Frost’s face reminds me of Aster right now, all concerned and sympathetic. Maybe that’s why I feel like I can trust him.

“You remember I was worried about my powers?” He nods. “It’s happened a few times. In September, I made an oak cold enough to cause it to splinter and break in half. There were some other flare-ups too, but I didn’t hurt anything. Then, a couple weeks ago when I was talking to one of the kids, I got upset and froze his window. It shattered into the room. I could have hurt him!”

“So you want to avoid the children, until you can be sure that you’re safe,” Winter smiles sadly. 

“Yeah. Guardian of Fun, not Guardian of Freezing to Death.” Because I have first hand knowledge of how much freezing to death sucks.

“Guardian of Fun?” One bushy eyebrow rises in question. Oh. Maybe he doesn’t know about my centre?

“That’s my title, I guess? I’m the Guardian of Fun. Fun is my centre. It’s what I do.” It’s who I want to be anyway. If I don’t screw it up.

“Well, now I am curious. How does a winter spirit embody Fun? Snowball fights and the like?” He’s not mocking me. Father Frost sounds genuinely interested.

“Yeah, but that’s not all I can do.” 

“But you can only affect your believers?”

“Actually, I can do more than that. I do snowballs and icy slides and snow days, but I can spread fun without needing belief.” I really can. I never thought about it before, but I’ve never needed people to believe in me in order for my happy flakes to work.

“Would you show me?” Any other time I’d jump at the chance to show off, but with my powers all over the place… “If you’re worried about control, let me help. I can most certainly rein things in should there be any problems.”

My skepticism must show because he sighs. 

“Try freezing something. That chimney,” he points at the tall stack. “Don’t concern yourself with hurting me. I assure you that you cannot.”

“If you’re sure?” He nods decisively. I raise my staff and send an icy blast at the chimney stack. Father Frost lifts his hand and the sleet curves back towards him, freezing solid and falling to the ground in an icy arc.

“Feel better?” he asks. I shrug. Maybe? He knew I was going to do that. He might not be prepared for when things happen unexpectedly. I don’t know if I want to rely on someone else, though I guess I sort of did with Sandy, except I wasn’t deliberately using my powers then…

Father Frost is watching me patiently.

“I guess so.” I should at least try, right?

“Is your staff required for you to manifest your elemental power?” He eyes my crook.

“Yeah. Is that weird?” I hold it out in front of me. “I found it right after I transformed. I think it was my father’s when I was alive. That’s how my powers first came out.”

“Hmm,” he steps closer to examine it. He doesn’t try and take my staff, but he does run a hand down the midsection. It’s different. Maybe it’s his magic or that we’re both winter spirits, but the wood seems to hum in response. Father Frost’s hand pauses over the scar.

“Was this always here?” he says, tapping the dark ice that fuses the two halves together.

“No. Pitch broke it last Easter. I managed to fix it though.”

“The Nightmare King.” I nod. He looks at me seriously. “And is it now as it always was?” 

“I never really thought about it. It feels fine. You don’t think-?” Father Frost grips my staff firmly and a soft blue glow emanates from the wood.

“I cannot sense anything dark or out of the ordinary, only a deep kinship with Winter.” That’s a relief. “Shall we go below and you can show me more of what you can do?”

“Umm, okay.” Show time. Better try happy flakes. At least those haven’t gone crazy on me yet. “Let’s go down to the sidewalk and I’ll demonstrate the fun stuff.”

We both leap down to the ground, the wind buffeting our fall, and land by the sidewalk. I’m careful not to get close enough to be walked through. Father Frost is nearer, but people seem to sense him or his cold and they skirt around where he stands.

What I need now is a target.

A frazzled looking woman is striding down the walkway, focused on her cell phone in tears. Ms. Ball-of-Nerves-and-Stress needs a pick me up, I think.

“Watch.” I form a happy flake in my hand, letting it sit there and sparkle so Father Frost can see. Then, with a gentle twitch of my fingers, I send it flying. It flutters on the breeze towards the woman and lands on her nose. Bullseye!

The woman’s stride stutters and she slips on the pavement. A teenager wearing a vivid pink furred hat grabs her elbow and steadies her, asking if she’s all right? Then she takes a shaky breath and smiles a little, nodding. Pink Hat doesn’t look convinced. 

“It’s fine, really. I’m just having a bad day," she tries to reassure the girl.

“You nearly fell over. Sit down before you break a hip or something.” Pink Hat goes red when Ms. Formerly-stressed-out laughs loudly.

“I’m fifty-six not eighty-five, young lady.” She looks at the teen wide eyed. “What a ridiculous hat. Can I buy it from you?”

The stunned teen isn’t sure whether to take her seriously until she pulls out a couple of twenties and the teen happily trades her hat for cash. The woman switches her black hat for the new one before answering her ringing phone again.

“No. No, you can hold your tongue and listen to for once.” My target rises, wearing the pink furred monstrosity like armour and smiling. “I am not coming in. I have better things to do, and if you want me to stay, you’ll take my concerns seriously.” 

Father Frost glances at me surprised and I grin. Ms. Newly-Acquired-Hat hangs up on whomever she was talking to and rolls her eyes.

“Ass,” she claps her hand over her mouth and bursts into giggles, the hatless teen looking at her in awe. Turning to the nearest window to admire her hat, the older woman spies the elaborate pastries inside.

“Come on,” she gestures to the teen. “My treat. What did you say your name was?”

“Christina.”

“I’m Linda,” she holds out a hand and pulls Christina to her feet. The two of them disappear into the shop.

“What did you do?” Father Frost asks, confused. “Was that mind magic?”

“That was a Happy Flake. Good for derailing negative thoughts, making people relax and have a little fun. Enjoy life instead of Bah Humbugging their way through it.” Inside the shop I can see the teen humouring the slightly giddy older woman. Who doesn't like free food?

“How unusual. Other than a lifting of spirits, does it have any other effects?”

“I don’t think so. Why? Winter spirits don’t do that kind of stuff?” Great, once again I’m abnormal. 

“I’m just trying to understand you a bit better, my boy. Your abilities are different, yet in essentials, I think we have a great deal in common,” Father Frost smiles wide. “I like to think I know how to enjoy myself as well.”

With a flick of his wrist the slightly inclined sidewalk across the street ices over just before a group of middle school kids reach it. The first one slips and grabs his friend, toppling them both down. They freeze for a moment in surprise and then laugh. Their friends haul them up and then take turns sliding their way down to the bus stop at the bottom, piling their backpacks up to create a landing zone.

Awesome.

Father Frost and I flit across the town, instigating more than a few snowball exchanges after he’s laid down a layer of moisture to help the snow stick. 

“You have to show me how to do that,” I plead and he chuckles. 

“Of course,” he agrees, but before he can an angry parent stalks past him and through me towards the battling kids. I gasp out loud and clutch at my staff. I’ll never stop hating that.

“Maya! Dwayne! Get over here!” he demands and two children scurry over. He stops on the sidewalk and I watch as the thick sheen of ice creeps underneath his boots. When he steps forward, his feet go out from under him and he lands hard, striking his forearm painfully against the icy concrete.

“Dad!” My head snaps over to look at Father Frost, who shrugs and winks.

“Come on, my boy.”

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

“Yeah, that’d be right. She never did like other folk much.” Sandy shrugs at me. He hasn’t spoken to Emily Jane in several decades and they’ve never discussed Jack. He doesn’t seem to think Mother Nature would have any interest in working with Manny. Can’t say I’m surprised. It was a long shot. 

“You’ll try and talk to her though? See if she knows anything?” Sandy exasperatedly agrees to the question I’ve asked more than half a dozen times already. I’m wound a bit tight, I suppose. Jack’s off on his own with Old Man Winter and I’m doing my best to be all right with that. 

I blink at the brightness when Sandy starts projecting again. The streams of sand branching off over the Perth night sky seem to be managing themselves while he does. A figure of Jack forms. Golden snowflakes swirl around him and Sand Jack reels a bit, trying to keep his balance amidst the chaos.

“You want to know how Jackie’s doing?” Sandy nods. “He’s all right. Old Man Winter seems to have mellowed, at least a little, and he likes him. He’s congenial enough to Jack anyway with his my boy and what have you.”

Sandy looks at me questioningly.

“Yeah, not what I expected either, given his history. I reckoned he’d be more eager to keep Jack in line, have him show respect to his elders and the like. Old Man Winter wasn’t that paternal with his own daughter that I recall, but he could be feeling his age.” 

With a flash of sand, he asks for more of an explanation. Sandy doesn’t keep up much with these sorts of things. Not that I do really, but I don’t think he talks to seasonal spirits or others spirits in general unless they seek him out. There are no days off when it’s always nighttime somewhere. 

Let's see if I remember this right, given that I avoided winter spirits where possible.

“She’s long since gone, leastways as much as I can tell, faded away most likely along with General Winter and some others. He was all right as far as winter types go. Had a decent enough sense of honour anyway, more than most of’em. I’d have introduced Jack to him first if he were still here.” It wasn't uncommon, fading. Not a few spirits had done so over time, some giving up, others willingly merging to maintain balance. The Trickster was a good example.

Sandy looks thoughtful as the bulk of the dream sand in the air begins to drift northerly and off into the ocean. Back to work, he shrugs apologetically. We exchange our good-byes and I watch him rise over the ocean and shrink into the night sky. 

I opt to take the long way home, stretching my legs and eating up more time. Jack won’t be back yet and I'd promised not to interfere with his visit. Springing off the tunnel walls, I run towards the Warren. It doesn’t take much time before I’m there though. I pass by Jack’s empty burrow and bound towards my own.

He’ll be fine. Should be anyway. Unless he isn’t. Except he will be. He took to opening the tunnels easily enough…

Gah, stop worrying!

I’ll get back to my sewing, that’s what I’ll do. Shirt’s finished and the pants are nearly done, though I still wonder whether I ought to take a nice piece of leather and make him a belt. 

After a little tidying and washing up, I settle into the green chair and set myself to work finishing the leg cuffs. The material is good quality. It won’t be much for warmth, but that’s no matter to Jack. The cut allows for movement and will suit his frame nicely. 

Jack’s probably having a bonzer time with “Father Frost”. I tug the thread through the fabric with a little more force than strictly necessary. Maybe being with another spirit of similar ability will give him more confidence to master his element, now that he’s discovering how powerful he can be when he tries. I stab the needle through again and make a few more tight stitches. The Old Man had better not hurt him is all I’ll say. 

That’s wishful thinking though, hoping Jackie’ll need me to step in. I can take care of myself, he’d say. Except that he doesn’t really. Not properly. Jack’s been on his own for a long long while, but he’s never been happy that way and he’s only just started talking about it.

I’ve just finished off one leg when I sense a fixed entryway cracking open and then snapping shut. India. That’ll be Baby Tooth, most likely. I rise and by the time she flits in I’ve already set out a wee cup of chamomile for her. The little fairy sits down gingerly and trills, the tilt of her head asking where Jack is.

“He’s out, with Old Man Winter. Shouldn’t be too much longer, but who knows? You know he’s been wanting to get on with winter spirits and the like?”

Baby Tooth nods and peers over, examining the cloth at my elbow.

“Ah, this is for Jack. What d’ya think?” I hold up the garment for her inspection. The tan trousers are almost done. Baby Tooth nods her approval, then runs a questioning hand own her own feathered front. She’s wearing the crisscrossed harness I made for her, with straps that curve around her wings and over her shoulders, letting her carry more in its tiny pockets and hanging bags. I fashioned it with buckles and a little room, because it’s only a matter of time before her slow growth starts to become noticeable. Truth be told, I’m not sure she’s even realized it yet, but I know growth when I see it. Tooth wants to let her figure it out on her own though, so I haven’t said anything.

I hold up the shirt as well and Baby Tooth circles it, humming. Then she takes hold of the drawstrings in the front and pulls, watching the lacings close the neckline snuggly. 

“Wasn’t sure if he’d want it done up or loose like. I changed all the buttons to laces. Jackie won’t lose the strings the way they’re fastened, but if they were buttons he’d be popping them all over the place, don’t you think? Plus, the cloth won’t go brittle with cold like some buttons would.” Baby Tooth nods her agreement and gestures around her waist. I’m certainly looking forward to her learning to talk. She’s not half bad at miming, but she’s nowhere near as expressive as Sandy. 

“A belt?” Baby Tooth nods eagerly. “Yeah, I was thinking about that. You’re keen on it too?” More eager nodding.

“I suppose you’d like to match then?” The wee fairy blushes a little. She adores Jack, who seems to think of her like a younger sibling. That could change once she’s grown enough to turn Jack’s head though… I shake the disturbing thought off. “All right. I’ll see what I can do. Not sure about pouches like yours. A rucksack or messenger bag might suit him better. Let’s go hunt down what we need.”

Baby Tooth follows me further into my burrow and down towards the storage rooms. I’ve a small supply here, bits and bobs mostly, though I’ve a wealth of leather left over from her harness. North had heaped more on me than I’d needed for one small fairy. When I open an inner door she darts ahead of me, streaking around the corner into the next branch. 

Ah. Chocolate.

Following her trail towards the chocolaterie, I grin when I find Baby Tooth holding a small leftover chunk of milk chocolate from my last batch. Ought to be safe enough for her. 

“Go on. Enjoy your prize.” The glee on her face reminds me of Jack when I’ve got him down here sampling. She breaks the piece in two, storing half in one of her bags and devouring the other. Toothiana would be horrified if she could see.

We find the leather we need and after some opinionated input from my feathered helper, I get to work. Not ten minutes later I catch her looking longingly at the clock.

“He’s been gone a while. It’s probably all right if you want to check up on him,” I suggest. It’s later than I thought he’d be, but I don’t want to be the one to interrupt them. I’d promised. Baby Tooth perks up immediately and flutters into the air. “Tell him we’re eating in an hour. You’re welcome to join us, as always.”

She nods, looking down at my work and then back up at me.

“No worries. That’ll give me plenty of time.” She chirps happily and buzzes against my cheek before dashing off to the Burgess exit.

There. Baby Tooth will let me know if anything’s amiss. I’m sure Jack’s fine. Just having a bit of fun. I lay out the pieces I’ve got done and figure I can finish cutting out the rest before heading into the kitchen. It’s something to keep me from worrying needlessly until he’s back anyway. 

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

“You see, you’re fine with me. There’s nothing wrong with you, my boy.” Father Frost sits hunched and turned towards me. There’s a flurry of snow that follows him, leaving a dusting of powder on his clothes. I can see his bare feet peeking out from his pants too. He must have kicked his boots off somewhere along the way. He’s definitely more relaxed. “In fact, I quite envy your youth and vigor.”

“300 years young, I guess?” He smiles at my quip. I am fine. I’ve been using my powers more than I have since fighting Pitch and it’s working. I’m not totally able to do what he can do, but different is okay, right? 

“When did these difficulties that I’ve seen no sign of start?” Father Frost asks. We’re sitting on the edge of a two-storey brick building that used to be a bank, the smell of bitter coffee wafting up from the café below. People are bustling back and forth, heading home from work in the fading light.

“Well, after everything with fighting Pitch and becoming a Guardian, I was okay. It was a bit later that I had a freak out. I lost control and froze part of… where I was staying. It only really happened the once. There were little flare-ups when I got emotional, but never like that again. I thought I had it under control over the summer because nothing else went wrong,” not in the Warren anyway, “but then things started happening again and not always when I was upset either.”

“For example?” 

“The tree, some other stuff, and even at the Guardian meeting in The Workshop. There was ice in Burgess when there shouldn’t have been, that might have been me,” though I really hope not, “and North said I used to cause blizzards that I never even knew about.”

“Blizzards?” Father Frost sounds shocked. We’d just been discussing my snow days and how much pull I had with weather systems. “Before you became a Guardian?”

“Yeah.”

“But you have no recollection of causing such a thing?”

“No.” That comes out more defensive than I’d like. I know North had been trying to understand. When they’d dragged me up to the workshop over being a Guardian, he’d been the most supportive, even knowing that the yeti hated me. Maybe that’s why it hurts so much now that he doubts my word about the blizzards.

“Then perhaps it is unrelated. I don’t believe that you could have performed such a massive weather shift unknowingly. It seems to me that most of your troubles began after becoming a Guardian.” It’s a relief to hear that about the blizzards, but Father Frost draws out the word Guardian darkly. 

“Taking the oath, you mean?” He nods in answer to my question.

“An oath is binding magic. It certainly would have had an effect.” Well, yeah, that was the point. I chose to be a Guardian. He pats my shoulder gently. “I know it all happened quickly, and you made your choice, but I doubt they explained the magics to you fully, my boy. The Man in the Moon hasn’t spoken to you about being a Guardian has he?”

“No.” Except for the dream/nightmare evil Jack thing, which was either my messed up imagination or a message from Manny telling me how terrible of a Guardian I am. “I’m not sure what he thinks of me. Sometimes I wonder…”

Father Frost doesn’t say anything but he looks at me encouragingly, his hand on my shoulder reassuringly firm.

“Why pick me? Why make me and do nothing for centuries?” Why leave me alone? “I don’t know. I’m not exactly like the others.”

“Christmas, Spring-now-Easter, the Dreambringer, and the Memory Witch?” Weird. Tooth is about as far from a witch as I can imagine. 

“Wonder, Hope, Dreams, and Memory. Fun doesn’t seem like much compared to that. They are trying to help me though, even if the Man in the Moon is ignoring me.”

“I am sure that they are,” he offers neutrally. That riles me a bit. They are trying. Father Frost is starting to sound as doubtful about them as Bunny is about Winter.

“What? You don’t believe me?”

“Forgive me, Jack, but it’s difficult to imagine. Particularly Spring. The Easter Bunny as he now appears is an old being, far older than any other I know. He has always been connected to life and light and hope. I find it… challenging to trust that he would truly support you, a winter spirit. Spring always tramples Winter.”

“Bunny’s been helping more than anyone,” I reply. Father Frost sounds pretty old too. How long has he known Aster? “Did you know him before?”

“Oh, we’ve each had our earlier aspects. We didn’t interact much, though I will say, I never found him sympathetic towards more human spirits. More condescending and arrogant, as though he knew better than those of us native to Earth. Perhaps he’s changed.”

He did change, even if he was like that before. He shifted and got all emotional, though he can be a jerk sometimes, especially about winter. That just made Bunny more human, didn’t it?

“However, since he seems to be on his best behaviour with you, I will endeavour to be more open.” Father Frost says sincerely and the tension that had been building in my chest eases. At least he’s willing to try and get along. I like that he actually listens to what I have to say. Maybe I can bridge the gap between the winter spirits and the others? “The Man in the Moon, however, has a great deal to answer for. You shouldn’t have been alone, Jack. We winter brethren stick together. At the very least, you could have been with one of us.”

I’m not sure what to say to that, because I agree. I really didn’t have to be alone all this time. Father Frost is helping me get a proper grip on my powers, like a mentor would. Maybe if he’d found me earlier on, we’d be more like family and Father Frost would be more than just a title.

It isn’t fair.

“Well now,” he interrupts my depressing train of thought, “I think that’s enough of these melancholy thoughts. Shall we continue with our fun?”

Hell yes. I grin and agree. Before our break we’d been testing out how delicate I could be with my ice, so we went back to that. It was kind of neat, if a bit odd. He had me icing over windows with layers of ice heavier than frost but not so great that they’d shatter the glass like Jamie’s. It worked best on cars, though as I got better the windows were pretty fragile. When people opened and closed their doors, the safety glass would splinter apart and surprise them. Father Frost thought it was funny. I guess it was okay if it happened right away and not while they were driving.

At his suggestion, I’m trying to ice the bottom of people’s boots instead of the ground now, but it’s hard to hit a moving target and get anything solid. I’m mostly tripping people up. It’s turning out to be less fun than it was earlier. I want to stop after the last attempt sent someone sliding into the street, but Father Frost reassures me that I’ll get it soon enough. Still- 

A twitter in my right ear catches me by surprise.

“Baby Tooth? Baby Tooth! Hey, when did you get here?” Her answering chirrup doesn’t sound very happy. Her feathers are all fluffed out and quivering.

“What?” I ask. She chirps again and put her hands on her hips, nodding sharply at the last man whose feet I’d slid out from under him.

“Hey. It’s just a little fun. I’m prac-” Whoa. The glare I get could cut granite. She’s really mad. Baby Tooth twitters and squeaks some more and I get the message pretty quick. I hold my staff up in surrender. “Okay, okay. I’m done.” 

“She’s upset. She sees only the harshness and not the caution,” Father Frost rumbles. “Little one, please let me explain.”

He gestures towards us and Baby Tooth approaches only close enough to try and settle on my shoulder. The contact makes me flinch. I don’t want to freeze her like I nearly did Tooth. She flits back up with a hurt expression. 

“Winter is a harsh season. There are many dangers to face in the cold and dark. People know this, but it is easy to forget and become complacent after three seasons in the sun. That is why we must remind them.” Father Frost points out into the town with a sweeping arm, snow falling gently all around. “You see meanness or callous disregard for safety in our actions. But isn’t a small slip less harmful than crashing a car on icy roads? Aren’t chilled fingers and chapped lips lesser ailments than frostbitten limbs or hypothermia? These little hurts are reminders of the dangers humans face during winter. Without them, things could be far worse.”

Wow. That totally makes sense to me. Baby Tooth still seems pretty skeptical though. She looks back and forth between us before tugging on my hoodie strings. She’s not giving up until I go with her. Stubborn fairy.

“Sorry. I have to go,” I apologize to Father Frost. 

“To see the Rabbit, I suppose, in his place of ever-spring.” Father Frost looks around begrudgingly, as if the ground might open up at any moment. 

“Uh - Nope. I’m going to the Tooth Palace, actually.” Baby Tooth chirps in surprise and looks at me confused.

“Ah. Are you looking for more memories?” he asks. Right. I told him about not remembering my shift.

“No. Pretty sure I’m done with that. Just visiting.” 

“Then I bid you good day and hope that we will meet again soon. If you should wish to contact me, focus through your staff. I am deeply connected to winter and its element, so I will be able to sense your call now that I know to listen for it.”

“Wow, great.” I can totally do without collecting sticky branches and writing in the snow.

“May your journey be swift and care free.” He gestures with his hand before disappearing in a whirl of snow. The wind blows fiercely, sending Baby Tooth and I speeding through the sky. Wow. I really need to learn how to do that, and the vanishing thing too. Crap! I forgot to mention meeting Tawis. Oh well. Next time I guess.

The gust that Father Frost created is moving us along faster than I’ve ever gone and even Baby Tooth is able to keep up. I don’t know why I didn’t want to slip down a tunnel in front of him. No, that’s not true. I didn’t want him to think I’m dependent on Bunny. I glance over and see Baby Tooth looking annoyed.

“You know, you should lighten up. Father Frost is a good guy,” I call to her over the roar of the wind. I actually had fun today. Playing with Tawis before had been good too. Maybe things will work out if I get a grip on my winter self? Baby Tooth shoots me a disbelieving look. “Just try, for me?”

She nods begrudgingly.

“Thanks, Baby Tooth.”


	10. Chapter 10

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

We make the journey across the Pacific in record time thanks to Father Frost’s help. Baby Tooth seems to have relaxed a bit. I hope she’s not still mad. We weren’t really hurting anyone.

The little harness that Bunny made her looks great. He put a lot of work into it. I’m not sure what she keeps in all those little bags and pockets, but they do seem useful. I’ve never really carried things around. I don’t have much of my own anyway, just the few things I’ve collected in my burrow over the years - books and trinkets mostly. My hoodie pocket doesn’t keep things secured when I’m flying anyway, especially now that the seam is trying to split. I really need to fix that.

The palace comes into view, its lights twinkling in the darkness. We land on one of the lower tiers. I’ve gotten to know the place a lot better on my visits, but it can still turn me around, especially at night. Considering that it wasn’t designed for human use to begin with, I think I do okay.

Baby Tooth hovers closely but doesn’t try and land on my shoulder again.

“Aww, it’s nothing personal, Baby Tooth. I just don’t want to accidentally freeze you. Didn’t Tooth tell you about what happened at The Workshop?”

Baby Tooth nods sadly. Great. More pity. I love Baby Tooth though. She’s a good friend, though I guess I think of her a bit like one of the kids. She seems so little and young. I wonder how old she really is?

A flock of mini fairies goes blazing by, twittering at her. I’ve always been a bit envious of that. There’s so many of them in their big crazy fairy family. I hope there’s some of that closeness between the winter spirits. Friends I can talk to at least. It feels strange to talk to the Guardians about each other. They’ve all been together longer and are probably closer to each other than any of them are to me. I don’t want to seem foolish or ungrateful if I complain about Tooth being too touchy feely or North thinking he knows what I need and then dragging me into it, literally. It’s probably just me anyway.

Baby Tooth claims a clear flat space and starts pulling things out of her pouches. Thread, possibly floss, a button, some small coins, and a lot of seeds. When I look at her curiously she holds her finger to her lips. Guess the seeds are some kind of secret. While she carefully sorts them and seals them away in her pouches, I look out over the palace and admire the scene. It’s nighttime, and even with the soft lights that stud the pillars the stars are easy to see. So many twinkling in the sky above while the land below is almost uniform in its darkness. Thankfully, while its always warmer in this part of the world, the breeze at this height keeps it from being too stifling.

A few fairies have gathered and brought a plate of food with them. Everything here is always good, so I help myself. They don’t though, instead eyeing Baby Tooth’s last bulging pouch. When she opens it suddenly the fairies multiply. Wait, is that chocolate? The cheer that goes up confirms my suspicion as the bounty is carefully shared. They all look so alike, but Baby Tooth, who I would have had a hard time separating from the others before, is clearly different. There’s a slight glitter to her feathers that the others don’t have and something else I can’t put my finger on. She grins up at me and her glee at having chocolate contraband in the Tooth Palace makes me laugh out loud. I wonder where she got it? Bunny probably. She must have been there before she came to get me. He must be expecting-

A mouse slides down a rope to squeak something to Baby Tooth, who calls back and motions for me to follow. I guess Toothiana knows we’re here. Up we go. I follow Baby Tooth’s path as closely as I can, not wanting to run into anything that might be hidden by the nighttime shadows. As we rise, I can see the blaze of light that surrounds Tooth where she’s issuing rapid-fire directions in a whirlwind of colour, fairies darting in from all directions. 

I wonder how the mice get their assignments?

“Jack. It’s nice to see you!” She pauses to issue another order. I think the fairies must collect all teeth, even if the kids don’t believe in the tooth fairy. Not everywhere in the world does, just like with Christmas or Easter, but I know Aster still goes to some of those places. North too probably. I’ve never asked them about it, but if my happy flakes work on non-believers, maybe they have stuff for them too?

“Things are just winding down a bit.” Tooth says. Baby Tooth starts to twitter to her, but she’s stopped by an upheld hand. “Wait.” 

I follow her gaze and see a tiny fairy making her way towards Toothiana, dipping and swerving through the air. Her feathers are bent and her eyes are teary. Tooth reaches out and beckons to her. “It’s all right. There, there. You’re home now.”

After Tooth had explained that others sometimes targeted her fairies, it made sense why they’d both watched and avoided me. They couldn’t be sure I wouldn’t hurt them like so many others did. Toothiana cups the tiny wounded fairy close, pressing her hand along her back and smoothing down her feathers. The fairy snuggles into Tooth and… whoa. 

Hold on a second.

“What was that?” I ask, a little horrified.

“I’m sorry, Jack. Did you need something?”

“That fairy, she- she vanished!” I point at the plumage on Tooth’s chest. There’s no sign of what happened to the injured fairy.

“Ah,” Tooth looks at me knowingly. “Aster hasn’t explained it to you has he? Sit down Jack.” She perches on a small bench and pats the space beside her. Baby Tooth squeaks in protest, but Tooth gives her a look and she promptly takes over directing the tooth fairy traffic.

“That fairy didn’t vanish. We rejoined.”

“You what?” Toothiana smiles at me reassuringly.

“The fairies are pieces of me, Jack. They’re created by my own personal magic. Haven’t you ever wondered why they all look the same?” she asks and I shrug. I couldn’t remember ever thinking about it too much. I’d just thought it was magic or something, like the elves. “ At first, I could only manage a few, but over the years I’ve gotten quite good at it.”

“And they’re okay with that? Just being sucked up again whenever you feel like it?” 

“We’re the same Jack. They are extensions of me, just smaller and lesser really. Smaller in body and in mind.” The idea is still pretty unsettling. Maybe it’s a totally normal thing for Tooth, but it seems really creepy to me.

“But what about-“ I glance over where Baby Tooth is chirping out orders.

“Oh not Baby Tooth! Not anymore. That’s your fault incidentally.” I’d worry about the blame but Tooth is obviously pleased. “I didn’t even know it was possible!”

“Umm, so what exactly did I do?” 

“You Named her. Gave her a purpose and experience outside of the others. It’s an old magic. It doesn’t always take hold, but in this case it did.” More accidental magic. Great. At least this is a positive change, the way Tooth’s talking.

“So you won’t reabsorb her?” I ask, hoping for some kind of promise that I won’t lose one of my few friends. I don’t have that many and Baby Tooth… well, I’d probably still be in Antarctica without her. Plus, I’m not sure how much I want all the things Baby Tooth knows about me to suddenly be Toothiana’s memories. Not that I don’t like Tooth. It’s just not the same.

“No, I won’t,” she pats my hand. “I’m not sure I could even if I wanted to. She’s less like a piece of me and more like a little sister I suppose, though I’ve never had a sibling, so I’m only guessing. Baby Tooth has picked up a lot in very short time. Her mind and magic have grown quickly, though Aster says that her body won’t be too far behind after a few decades or so.”

The implication that Baby Tooth is going to grow up boggles my mind a bit. 

“Will she be like your twin then?” Toothiana laughs at my question.

“I don’t know! Isn’t that wonderful?”

“Huh. What about the mice? Are they-?” 

“Oh no.” Tooth shakes her head. “That’s another kind of magic altogether, something that happened when the Tooth Fairy myth took hold. But that’s not why you’re here is it? Why did you stop by? I was sure Baby Tooth would be spending the night in the Warren with you and Bunny.” 

Yeah, that was the plan, wasn’t it? 

“Umm. I was getting to know Father Frost today, actually. Baby Tooth showed up to drag me away.” Plus, I panicked and didn’t want Father Frost to think badly of me for living in the Warren. “I don’t know. Seemed like a good idea at the time.”

“You did tell Aster you were coming here?” She asks, her eyes round. Oh crap. He’s probably freaking out that I haven’t come back, thinking Father Frost’s done something to me. “Oh Jack. I’m glad you’ve been doing well, but maybe we should catch up another time?”

“Yeah, I’d better go.” I hesitate on the bench for a minute, bouncing on the balls of my feet, thinking about just how upset Bunny’s going to be. Baby Tooth flits over with crossed arms and squeaks out something that makes Tooth look up at me with concern.

“You should really get going.” I don’t like the chastising tone, but she’s right. 

There’s a fixed tunnel not far from the Tooth Palace. Dropping down and knocking it open only takes a minute of fumbling in the darkness. Aster will know it’s me right away though. He always does.

I take a moment to breath deeply before trudging downwards. Yelling. There’s definitely going to be yelling. I’d made him promise not to interfere or show up and he’d made me promise to be home for dinner in return, because he doesn’t trust Winter. 

Or me. Fuck. I’m not a child. I can take care of myself.

By the time I emerge into the centre and Aster’s burrow is in sight, I’m kind of pissed off. Bunny’s never cared how long I was out before. I don’t need a curfew and if I’d had any trouble I’d have opened an emergency portal myself. 

I push open the door, but if Bunny’s home there’s no sign of him. That’s odd. He was so insistent about when I’d get back and now he’s not even here. I decide to go to the winter burrow, but before I reach the door, it swings wide and thuds into the wall.

“Jack?” Aster stands on the threshold out of breath. “Are ya all right? What happened?” He grasps my shoulders, startling me.

“What? I’m fine.” I answer as he runs hands up and down my sides.

“Yer fine?” He pauses, holding onto me like I’m some little kid who’s been lost and found. Seriously? “What took ya then?”

“Nothing. It’s not a big deal.” Aster looks dumbfounded when I shrug out of his overprotective hold.

“Not a-? Didn’t Baby Tooth find ya?” 

“Yeah, she did. Guess I was running a bit late. I wasn’t keeping track and we stopped by to see Tooth. Did you know that Baby Tooth’s been sneaking chocolate up there?” I turn away from him and walk into the sitting room. If he’s going to yell at me, I want to be comfortable.

“Hold on, hold on… Ya went to the Tooth Palace? Why? Why would ya do that?” Bunny’s wounded confusion spawns just the tiniest bit of guilt in my gut. “You were supposed ta be back-“

“Oh come on, Bunny. It’s not like I have a curfew.” I say as I slump into a chair. He can’t have worried that much? 

“No, but ya coulda said something! Ya knew I was waiting.” Bunny follows and stands, staring down at me. Yeah, he’s mad more than worried, I bet.

“You didn’t have to. You’ve way too uptight about this. I was fine. Father Frost was awesome. He’d never hurt me.” I meet his eyes determinedly, knowing he probably won’t understand.

“You’ve known him for all of a week, Jack.” Aster’s expression darkens. “Ya don’t know what he’s really like.”

“What he was like centuries ago you mean? I’m not an idiot, Bunny, or a bad judge of character. People change. You’re overreacting- ” 

“I am not.“ He draws himself upright, defensively crossing his arms.

“-and you expect the worst of every winter spirit!” 

“You’re too bloody trusting, is what you are!” Bunny thrusts a pointed finger at me. “And ignorant of-“

“I’m not ignorant!” I jump up from the chair, knocking his arm away and pushing him back. “Stop being so condescending! I thought you were being a worrywart, but now I think you’ve just got a grudge you won’t let go. You don’t want to accept anything good about winter. I’m a winter spirit too Bunny!”

“You’re also a Guardian-“ 

“What if I wasn’t, Aster? What if I was just me? Would that be okay or would you turf me out like the “reckless winter brat” that I am?” Like when the Guardians finally talk to Manny.

Aster growls at me and throws his hands in the air, “Now yer just talkin’ nonsense. What’s he filled yer head with? That Old Man- “

“Father Frost!” I swing my crook towards where he’s standing between me and the door, but Bunny doesn’t even flinch.

“-is nothing but trouble. If ya ask me-“

“I didn’t! I didn’t ask you Bunny. I don’t need to know what you think, because I already do.” My voice keeps rising until I’m shouting at him. “You think you know everything!”

“Well ya don’t seem ta be thinkin’ at all!” Aster’s returns loudly, green eyes blazing. 

“Just because I think you’re wrong doesn’t mean I’m stupid!” 

“I never said-“

“You’re being an arrogant jerk!” I shove past him.

“I’m a jerk ‘cause I give a shit about that ratbag taking advantage of ya?” Bunny reaches for my arm and I whirl around. I’m so angry I could scream.

“He’s not doing anything to me except helping and I can take care of myself!” 

“Jack-“ I need to get out of here.

“Just leave me alone!” I avoid looking at him and slam the door soundly on my way out, not wasting any time in fleeing back to my burrow. 

The second I’m through the doorway I ice it over and scream.

“Self righteous, arrogant, know-it-all- Gah!” I hit the frozen wall with my staff and it bounces back violently. The room full of hardly used furniture and tidy shelves feels like it’s mocking me. Hell with this. I shatter door slab and leave, icing the place up solid behind me.

I need some air.

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

“Jack!” I yell and wrench the door back open, but he’s already fled halfway back to his place and it occurs to me that I should let him cool off.

It’s a near thing, but I manage to restrain myself from heading over there. It’d likely only result in continuing the fight. Strewth, I just want to grab him and… and what? Shake him? Hold him? Jack’s mad as a cut snake. Probably would have given me frostbite.

I shut the door with a hard sigh. Could’ve been worse. I thought he’d been hurt for a bit, that something had gone wrong. Run myself into a right state checking if he’d come back somehow and I hadn’t noticed. Then I’d practically molested him when I’d found him here at home. Hadn’t liked that one bit had he?

Of course he hadn’t. I’m an arrogant jerk, apparently, for caring. I’ve never thought him stupid. Naïve maybe. Jackie’s so damn desperate for connections and understanding… It’s not enough from this old Pooka, is it? Snowflake’s got a whole world out there waiting for him now and I’m just holding him back. I figured he’d be off eventually, just not like this.

I force myself to stop pacing around like a boofhead. Bloody feelings. Blasted chocolate probably isn’t helping any. Been working on and off on the special combinations and I’ve likely absorbed a little. It’s been a long time since I’ve touched the stuff and I react differently depending on the recipe. 

Throwing open the door, I go in the opposite direction of Jack and straight to the nearest meditation spot in the meadow. My tetchy nerves aren’t helping me think properly at the moment, not that hard logic has never seemed to work where Jackie’s concerned. Sitting down on the grass, I take a few deep breaths and blow out as much negative energy as I can before slowly finding a rhythm. There’s a slight chill to the air in the Warren and it sends a shiver up my back, making my ears twitch nervously. Breathe.

I settle into a calmer state and keep myself there for a while, holding onto the stillness. The worry and anger slip away, but confusion stubbornly remains. Why? Why hadn’t Jack come back when he’d said? He’d promised. We’d talked about it, quite reasonably I’d thought. The hurt from that slight joins forces with my confusion and both stubbornly refuse to be swept away. 

He’d been aggro with me when he’d got back. The Old Man had probably said something to him and gotten Jackie all wound up over it. If I’d heard right, Jack had broken his promise due to some sort of upset at me being overprotective. He’s never been bothered by it before though, and yeah, all right, I’m distrustful of the winter spirits, but I have past precedent for that! 

Not that Jack’ll listen to me about it now. When I visualize what he’d looked like, his defiant expression and fierce eyes, the passionate emotions that stir in my chest aren’t anywhere close to anger. I clamp down on them viciously. 

Breathe. 

Right. So, Jackie clearly doesn’t like that I don’t get on with the Old Man. He’s insecure enough with the winter spirit thing and whatever Manny’s been doing, and now he’s set on being mates with “Father Frost”. My shouting and clinging and having bloody feelings all over him doesn’t help matters. I’d best suck it up and apologize.

He still shouldn’t have broken his promise. I’d thought- well… clearly I was wrong. 

I let everything fade away into blankness until it’s been at least an hour since our blow up. Jack should have burned out his fury by now. Better get moving.

When I arrive, the winter burrow has been closed up. There’s no sign of Jack. Shutting my eyes, I reach out to the Warren to see if he’s still here. Nothing. It’s possible he’s hiding, using his previous methods to avoid my senses, but I know how to look for the signs. He’s not here. He’d probably gone when I was meditating and I hadn’t noticed. Damn.

Looking more closely at burrow, I realize Jack hasn’t just sealed over the doorway, he’s frozen the whole of it solid, rendering it uninhabitable. It’ll take months to melt and that means he’s not planning on being back anytime soon.

If at all.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Shit, what a mess. How does Bunny push by buttons like that? I know he’s worried, but it just grates on me. He’s coddling me, and yeah, I like having someone care enough to, well, care. I like his hugs, and attention, and all of it. I do.

Maybe I am being an idiot. I shouldn’t have iced the whole burrow over, but it’s too late to go back now. I think I’m somewhere over the Andes. At least the cold has helped clear my head a bit.

I heave a sigh and most of the anger is gone. I should have just gone straight home. I don’t want to be weak though, or pathetic enough to be so damn needy. I don’t need him like that. I just want… I want things I can’t have. Because I mess up and I’m wrong somehow, even Manny thinks so and he’s the one everyone looks up to isn’t he? 

Asshole moon and his stupid dreams.

“Are you all right, my boy?” I flinch sideways and tumble a little through the air before I recover.

“Father Frost?” How did he know I was here? He looks the same as when we’d parted a few hours ago, though he’s found his boots.

“Ah. My apologies. I didn’t mean to startle you, but I could sense your distress.” Oh. I’d lashed out a bit in frustration at some innocent rocks and things earlier. Guess he’d felt that.

“Sorry,” I offer. He shakes his head as me, snow falling gently behind him and swirling away on the wind. 

“Where are you going now?” He asks, and I know what he’s thinking. He’d sent us zooming over to Asia to see Tooth, so why am I soaring over South America?

“Nowhere really. Just needed some air.” He cocks his head at me curiously. “Flying helps me think.”

“I understand. I much prefer it myself.” 

“You said something like that. About a previous state or spirit thing?” Which had made me really curious. Aster’s the only one I know who’s talked about having a previous aspect, though I’m pretty sure Tooth has changed at least some too.

“Mmm. I did. I was once known as the North Wind, the strongest of the winds, though I had many names in many places.”

“Well, we’re almost as south as we can get. Are you going to get in trouble?” Father Frost laughs at me.

“Oh no. Wind spirits have mostly long faded away. Few have endured the millennia without undergoing great change. I was stronger and my winter connection proved to the key to my longevity. It is not only belief that can sustain a spirit.”

We continue on for a bit, quietly. Father Frost doesn’t pry, he’s just kind of there. Maybe it would help to talk to someone? Except, he doesn’t like Aster to begin with… Damn it, I need to talk to somebody.

“Umm, do you need to be anywhere right now?” I don’t want to be a burden on everyone I know.

“No, Jack,” he looks at me carefully. “Is something troubling you?”

“Kind of. I guess I’m feeling a bit torn.” Father Frost nods encouragingly and then the words come in a flood. “Practically three centuries of being alone and, big surprise, my people skills suck. I’ve never had friends before. I only just started to get to know other spirits this year. I’m getting better at having actual conversations, but I’m new and sometimes I feel like the others treat me like a kid or an idiot. Like I don’t know what’s best for me. I’m three hundred years old and I’ve been taking care of myself all that time. They don’t really understand what it’s been like.”

They really don’t. Bunny comes closest probably, which might be why I find it easier to talk to him. He’s racked up a lot more lonely years than me. I wish he’d understand about Father Frost.

“I mean, they’re trying to help and be supportive, but I’m not sure I fit in as a Guardian. It all happened really fast. There’s so much about who and what I am that I don’t understand.”

“Like the elemental part of your spirit?” It’s less a question than a statement from Father Frost, who actually gets it. Aster would be trying to convince me to go to see the Williams again right now.

“Yes! Exactly. None of them really get that, because they’re different. They know who they are and where they came from. They chose their paths. I never did. Wham, bam, and suddenly… Jack Frost. Don’t bother calling, because no one gives a shit.”

“I am sorry to hear it, my boy, but you must know that we would have-“

“I know! God, I know. It just makes it harder, knowing that I could have had friends if he hadn’t-“ I have to suck in a few breaths to calm down before I start bawling. This is why I’d exited into daylight time zones where I don’t have to deal with the moon looking down on me.

I’m so tired of being alone, of being the odd one out.

Father Frost comes a little closer and pats my arm, pointing below. Yeah, maybe landing would be a good idea. We fly down and land on the ice-rime of Cerro Torre. I find myself clutching my staff, twisting my hands a long its length while Father Frost looks at me with quiet concern.

“Do winter spirits… do you have friends and families?” My question comes out shaky and a little desperately hopeful. 

“Yes, we do. I had children once, and not a few dalliances, as a spirit. It is possible for some. I doubt I could father children now, winter is not known for its fertility, though a spirit like St. North would likely be able to should he choose. Love is not a foreign thing, for all its rareness. Spirits do couple or form strong bonds through the ages. The Snow Queen and I are quite close, for example, though we are not lovers.”

So they do have relationships like humans. I could still have that, though maybe not kids, which doesn’t really surprise me. I thought I was dead before and now, even if that’s not exactly what happened, Father Frost is right about things not growing in winter.

“What you have, that works for you? You’re happy?” Father Frost motions with his hand and a bench forms for us to sit. He settles next to me before answering with his creaking voice. 

“It does take some effort. Sometimes in our age we withdraw from others or give up and fade entirely. Being long lived changes one’s perspective - grudges and passions can be heightened or numbed depending on personality. Madness is not uncommon amongst the very ancient. Still, there is a measure of happiness to found though, if one seeks it.”

“Normal relationships are rare then?” He frowns at my question, not wanting to disappoint me maybe?

“My boy, it is more a matter of finding the right match amongst a very limited pool. Finding someone who can understand your nature is difficult. Winter spirits experience this more than most I am afraid, and we are fewer in number. We are not known to be warm or welcoming partners, though you will know as well as I do how untrue that is.”

Finding a match… 

“None of the Guardians have, umm, partners.” It’s not a question really, but Father Frost answers anyway.

“They tend to keep to themselves, unsurprising for a creature like the Sandman. The Tooth Fairy was never entirely human, surrounding herself with her reflections, and Nicholas St. North has his followers and his work. I have no idea regarding the Easter Bunny due to his inhuman nature, though spring spirits are often the most quickly passionate and least enduring in their affections.” He is trying, using their proper names and not being as harsh as he was before. 

I can kinda see how North is a bit of a workaholic and Bunny is definitely quick tempered. The Guardians had all admitted to becoming more isolated actually, once they’d been brought back together to fight Pitch again. They’d been too busy or focused to care about anything except their duties.

“Does it worry you? That you will be like them?” He asks me gently.

“Maybe?” I fiddle with my crook and make a few random lines in the snow. “I don’t know. I haven’t asked them about it.” 

“There seems to be a great deal you are uncomfortable discussing with them, despite your obvious want of affection. Is there more to your upset than just their view of your inexperience?”

Do I tell him about the dream? Maybe he can help me make sense of it?

“I had this dream.” Father Frost straightens and looks interested.

“Dreams can contain many portents.” I really, really hope not. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Yeah.” And I do. So I explain it to him, the Workshop, the lack of sound, the shadows and the silhouette Guardian attack on the bad Jack. At some point, he puts his arm around my shoulders and I lean against him.

“It has disturbed you greatly. Do you think it was sent by the Man in the Moon?” I nod. “Hmmm. I am not so sure. It does align with your fears and insecurities a great deal. You do worry about your place with the Guardians, whether it is where you are truly meant to be, and I won’t dismiss your concerns. They seem very genuine. You haven’t mentioned this to the other Guardians?”

“No.”

“My dear boy,” he smiles at me. “I think you’ve been working yourself into quite a state over this Guardian business and the problems you’ve experienced with your powers. You need to step back and find your confidence again.”

Confidence? Can I really be that messed up that it’s all in my head? That would almost be a relief, because then I wouldn’t have to keep worrying about Manny telling the others to de-Guardian me.

Father Frost gives my shoulder a quick squeeze and then stands stiffly. I always forget how old he is when we’re flying. He’s a lot less spry on the ground. Once he’s up, he turns back to me and holds out his hand.

“Come to the court with me, Jack. I think it will do you good. It isn’t a permanent thing, but those who have gathered this year for the Winter Solstice would be glad for your presence. Would you not like to meet them as well?”

Now? I stare at his hand. Guess it’s not like I can go back to the Warren for a bit anyway. Not the way I left. I’d better give Bunny some space after I insulted him like that.

“Okay.” I smile up at him and grab his hand. “Let’s go.”

“Excellent!” Father Frost pulls me to my feet. “Now when we arrive, allow me to introduce you before getting ahead of yourself. We can be a wary group and while we have adapted, some are still, well... You’ll see soon enough.”

He stands their grinning and I’m a bit confused.

“Ummm, how are we getting there anyway? I’m not sure about flying across the equator…”

“Oh no, Jack. Allow me.” Sweeping out his other arm, Father Frost brings the moisture in the air around us in a blinding whirl and then everything goes white.


	11. Chapter 11

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

I hope Bunny isn’t too angry. I don’t know what the hell happened. I was just so… I don’t know. I don’t know what it was that got me so pissed off, but I can’t take it back now. I’ll try and make it up to him later. Let him meditate for a while on why he shouldn’t beat the hell out of me when I get back.

The whirlwind of snow blows itself out and Father Frost begins shuffling towards the lone building in the area. It looks like a frozen fairytale palace that got lost on its way to the ball. Wow. The doorway swings open silently and shuts behind us the same way.

“Come Jack. I’ll introduce you to the others. They’ve all been waiting to meet you.” He notices me glance down at my worn clothing. “Don’t worry about that. We’re none of us quick to judge, my boy. We’ve all had our turn suffering the brunt of such things in our time.”

Father Frost leads on through another set of eerily silent doors and into a maze of corridors. The walls alternate frosted and clear sections of ice, making patterns down the hallways, and the sconces hold some kind of cool glowing light. The thinnest panes of clear ice I’ve ever seen cover the windows. Crystalline shapes and fractals sprawl across the borders, but there’s no fabric or paint or anything like that. Nothing but the elements of winter. It’s incredible. 

I catch sight of some kind of large creature out one of the windows, but Father Frost ushers me away and into a room before I can ask about it. Standing near the door are three women who must be spirits, because I’m not sure how they wouldn’t be freezing to death otherwise. 

“They’ve all heard a great deal about you, my boy, but formal introductions are a must.” Father Frost smiles and scoots me forward until I’m standing in the centre of the room.

“Err, sorry for arriving in the middle of the night.” 

“It’s no matter.” Father Frost answers for them. “We don’t generally keep our hours by the sun the way mortals do.” 

Mortals strikes me as an odd word choice, but whatever.

“First, my dear Snow Queen,” the woman who steps forward is beautiful, all pale and glittery, “may I introduce Jack Frost?”

“Mr. Frost,” she greets me formally. Mr. Frost. That’s a first. Her colouring is almost the same as mine. She’s wearing this long thick snowy cloak, fastened at her throat by a silver snowflake that matches her tiara.

“Uh, just Jack is fine.” I hope they don’t expect me to bow or kiss her hand or something. Her gloved forearms are clasped in front of her, so I lean on my staff and opt to continue standing there awkwardly. I’m probably less likely to offend them that way. 

“Jack, then.” The Snow Queen’s expression is so flat I can’t figure out if she’s sad or just really bored. I can feel the royal vibes from her stiff elegance though. This is probably who Tawis was talking about before. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Yuki-Onna,” Father Frost announces. The shorter woman, decked out in white a silk kimono, smiles and offers a shallow bow. Her black hair falls over her shoulders in a shock of darkness, but the rest of her is almost pale enough to be transparent. She’d be beautiful if she weren’t so creepy. The girl grinning next to her couldn’t be more different.

“Anna.” Father Frost gestures and she bounces forward, colourful and intense.

“Oh Jack, I’m so glad you could come! We’ve been hoping for ages. I’m so excited.” Anna looks vaguely European in her skirt and blouse, thick hair in plaits like my sister used to wear sometimes. Unlike the other women, she looks warm, with pink cheeks and red lips.

A throat clears loudly, disrupting the formality. Tawis is standing off to the side against the wall. He’s wearing a shirt now with his leathers. Neither he or Anna look quite as touched by winter as the rest of us do. Father Frost turns and sighs.

“This is Fl-“ he begins, but Tawis interrupts.

“We’ve met. Hello again, Jack.” He smirks. “Have you been having fun without me?”

Father Frost gives me a significant look. Oops.

”Ummm, just hanging out with Father Frost. Tawis and I met once on Baffin Island.” I explain. 

“Did you now?” He looks to Tawis, who rolls his eyes. Father Frost snaps at him in a language I don’t understand. There’s a quick conversation where words are traded sharply until Father Frost glances back at me and ends it.

“Placet?”

“Yes, fine, though I think we better leave off the Latin or poor Jack will be left out of everything.” Tawis smirks again, like he’s in on a joke I’ve missed.

“Latin is the preferred common language of more ancient spirits, Frost-san, at least the western ones who seem to think themselves the centre of everything.” Yuki-Onna purrs behind me. 

“She’s right.” The obviously Native American Tawis adds, nodding at Yuki-Onna. “The rest of us give in because they’re hopeless at learning any of our tongues, though these days English is far more common. But I suppose we should be respecting our elders.”

“Oh, would you stop? I want to show Jack the rest of the castle,” Anna demands more than asks before grabbing my hand and pulling me aside. “We build a new one every year. It’s almost finished. Want to take a look?”

“Every year?” How many ice palaces are there?

“For Winter Solstice,” Father Frost rescues me from my confusion. “We let them melt away after, but every solstice we gather to celebrate together. Other than those you’ve just met, there are some lesser winter elementals you may encounter, but no one important. I do hope you’ll stay and join in, Jack.”

“There’s a room set aside for you, should you need it.” The Snow Queen offers.

“Wow. Thanks. Yeah, I’d really like that. The winter solstice is soon right?” Before Christmas anyway, I think.

“Just a few weeks away!” Anna does a little twirl. “We haven’t had this many spirits together for ages. Not since General Winter faded.”

“Faded?” No one had totally explained the fading thing to me. Tawis just shrugs.

“It happens sometimes. Believe me, you aren’t missing out.”

“He refused to bend,” Yuki Onna explains oddly. Something clicks in my memory and I remember Sandy’s warning about a kimono clad winter spirit. That makes me wary. No sign of Stone Guy though.

Tawis snorts in response, “That’s one way to put it. Don’t worry Jack. Only the weak fade.”

Father Frost glares at him.

“We may be fewer in numbers than ever before, but Jack has a true winter spirit. I cannot imagine him giving into such selfishness and abandoning his season.”

At that, they all turn to look at me. Great.

“No way. I- uh, I’ve just started figuring all this out, you know?” Way to sound like a dork.

“I’m sure we can help you find your way.” The Snow Queen moves beside me. “Shall we begin with a tour?”

“I’m coming too.” Anna comes up on my other side and jostles me a little with her shoulder.

“I’ve seen it. We’ll talk later.” The uninterested brush off from Tawis doesn’t bother me any. He probably helped build the place. Yuki Onna and Father Frost make their excuses as well, leaving me with Anna and the Queen. Anna pretty much takes over the conversation and drags me down a long hall and deeper into the palace. The Snow Queen follows sedately.

“Wait until you see the Ballroom!”

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

The kiln is full of Jack’s last batch of figures, little animals mostly. He’s been developing a talent for it. Carefully removing the pieces, I give them each a home on the shelf I’ve cleared out for Snowflake’s work. There’s quite the collection. I wonder if he’d been intending some of them for Christmas prezzies?

I’m still trying to understand exactly what got Jackie’s back up so fast yesterday. Accumulated frustrations maybe? He was upset about how I talked to Old Man Winter during that first call. We got on fine after though, back in the Warren, and he seemed right pleased by being added to the magics here. 

How’d it gone south so quickly?

Condescending, he’d said. Uptight. Think I know everything…

Been a while since I’d heard those accusations, but once upon a time? Yeah. 

It had been a rough go figuring out human behavior, even with millennia to try. They were rarely straightforward. Nothing like a Pooka would have been. Everything had layers and tones and body language. They’d ask, “What do you think, Bunnymund?”, like it was the simplest bloody question. It was a riddle, is what it was. Did they genuinely want to know what I thought? Or were they were looking for me to agree with them? Or maybe I supposed to find the answer that fell neatly between the two options they were arguing about? I’d assumed the first and it had taken some time to realize that, a) humans weren’t often literal and b) what they asked for was rarely what they actually wanted. They were very imprecise in their language. It had also been confusing as hell that humans placed such a heavy importance on tone and physicality. Pooka language was the exact opposite – words, pronunciation, and the careful constructions of sentences, were paramount. These nutters had come up with things like sarcasm.

It made for a lot of missed meanings and misinterpretations. Condescending know-it-all wasn’t far off centuries ago, from a local perspective anyway, until North and Tooth and the others had adjusted their expectations of me and we’d come to understand each other. It wasn’t until after my shift, when my physical and emotional aspect became more dominant, that I properly sorted it out. Snowflake and I wouldn’t have been able to build a friendship the way we have otherwise. I’d have written him off based on a few actions and never looked any closer, never seen the emotional wounds and damaged self esteem that coloured his behavior. 

Like how his need for acceptance is inversely proportional to his willingness to ask for it. 

That winter lot better tread lightly. He may have been slowly improving, but I’m not sure Jackie’d recover if they rejected him outright. Seems unlikely though. If he’s lucky, he’ll find some kindred spirit to befriend that’s got a less ominously dark past than the rest of them. Some younger winter elemental or sprite or what have you. 

He hasn’t been gone long, but the Warren feels too quiet. The sentinels and their stiff faces look at me accusingly and the few googies I keep about year round are all in a tizzy. The Winter Burrow, christened as it is by the sign I’d made, is uninhabitable now. Jack had been spending more and more time at my place, but that burrow had been uniquely his, his haven since ’69. Ruddy embarrassing that. Not that I’d have it any other way now. If I could go back, I’d try and keep my temper in check and listen to him instead of assuming the worst. 

I suppose that’s what he’s been trying to get me to do with winter spirits in general, but I’ve met most of them and come away with a fairly solid understanding of their ilk. Not all mind you. Never did meet the Snow Queen. And I meant what I said to Sandy. General Winter hadn’t been so bad, but he’d faded away, like most of the less objectionable winter types had. The whole season had been on a long slide into darker territory as far as I could tell.

I hope Jack comes back all right, or just bloody comes back at all.

A twang of magic sets my ears twitching. It’s coming from Burgess. Not the door I’ve fixed there though. It’s from the egg sentry statuette I’d left tucked away in the Bennett’s garden, just in case. I’m halfway there before the second round of knocking starts up. When I emerge, both Jamie and Sophie are kneeling in the snow. 

“What happened?” I gasp out, braced for an emergency.

“Bunny!” Sophie throws herself at me and I catch her up. Jamie gives me a half hearted smile and nod.

“Hey there.” The little kiddiewink giggles and presses her face into my cheek. “You two are all right then?”

“Yeah,” Jamie peers up at me with anxious eyes. “Have you seen Jack?”

Ah. Of course it’s about Jack.

“C’mon. Let’s get inside and we’ll talk, yeah?” We trudge inside through their back door. I can hear the vacuum running. Must be the weekend with their mother home at this hour. I help the kids pull off their outerwear and end up with an excited Sophie on my shoulders.

“Bunny, we paintin'?” She tugs on my ears. Today hadn’t been a planned visit; otherwise I’d have brought art supplies for her to play with like I usually do. Sophie couldn’t seem to help getting into things with her hands. That girl was going to be unstoppable when she got older.

“Sophie, no,“ Her brother starts anxiously. I pat him on the back and he clams up, lips pressed tightly together.

“Not today, sweetheart. Maybe next time.” She sighs and holds on tightly, Jamie leading us up the stairs to his room. I’m beginning to worry that something else has gone wrong.

We settle on the bed before Jamie takes a deep breath and asks, “Is Jack okay?”

“He’s all right enough,” I hedge.

“What does that mean?” The boy whines. “He totally freaked out the last time he was here and now he’s avoiding everybody!”

“Avoiding’em?” It’s not easy to be serious while Sophie babbles a made up song over my head as she pets me.

“Pippa and Monty finally saw him yesterday and he didn’t even stop to say hi,” Jamie sags. “I know he’s upset about Claude and Caleb, but we’re still his friends. We still believe in him.”

While I’m not sure how far to go with an explanation, Jamie deserves something. I don’t want to break Jack’s confidence, or scare the kid, but I’m not fond of lying either. 

“He’s not mad at us for Claude and Caleb, is he?” Jaime asks, fringe hanging in his eyes, needing a trim. He’s got the coverlet all twisted in his hands too. Best be straightforward.

“It’s nothing like that. What happened last time,” I nod towards the window that’s been boarded up, “really did upset him, but maybe not the way you’re thinking. Jackie slipped up a little and he’s worried he might hurt ya, that’s all. He’d never forgive himself if he did.”

“Really?” He asks. I nod decisively and Sophie giggles at the dip. It seems to make him feel better. I forget how attached to Jack the boy is sometimes. 

“Okay,” Jamie continues, looking more confident and resolute. “We’re going to fix things, though. Right?”

“That’s the plan, but it would help if ya told me more about what’s been going on.” Everything I’ve gotten so far has been filtered through Jack. 

“Sure!” Jamie’s always been eager to help. He’s a good boy, that one. He hops off the bed and grabs a battered notebook from his desk, flipping it open to reveal some very sloppy writing. “So, the weird weather stuff? It’s been really weird. Super weird even, because it only happens in bits.”

“Bits?” 

“The black ice that caused the car accident Claude and Caleb were in? That was only a few days after Halloween and it was only on that stretch of road. Earlier that day the ground was muddy because it rained. Pippa accidentally dropped her bag in it and it soaked through to her gym clothes.”

Jamie paces back and forth in the room, pointing at his notes emphatically.

“It wasn’t just that day either. We’ve been having cold spots. Pippa’s mom had a car window shatter from the cold one afternoon when there wasn’t even snow and some pipes froze at the school over the weekend, but only at the front of the building.” He pages through to a roughly drawn map.

“We started asking around and listening to what the parents and teachers were saying. Then Monty made a spreadsheet and we mapped it all out. The cold spots are only happening near our school and this neighbourhood, Bunny, where Jack’s believers are.” 

Well shit. That doesn’t bode well. Jack mentioned the tree and what happened with the window. Could this have been him too? No, that can’t be right. He hasn’t been here that often. Plus, whenever Jackie’s powers have flared up, he’s been well aware of it. Must just be odd weather patterns…

“I wanted to ask Jack and see if he knew what was going on, but then that happened,” he gestures to the window, ”and now he won’t come see us!”

Well, it’s nice to know the kids haven’t assumed the worst and blamed Jack, at least.

“Do you know anybody that could do all that? Besides Jack, I mean.” Jamie sits by me expectantly. 

“What?” 

“You know, other myths or spirits? I mean, you guys are real, and the Boogeyman. Are there others too?” I raise an eyebrow at him. “Like, I don’t know, Frosty the Snowman?”

My perplexed expression must speak for me.

“Yeah, okay, Cupcake thought that was a dumb idea too. What about Chione? Yuki-Onna? The Snow Queen?” Jamie lists off more spirits, some more directly responsible for human deaths than others. I can feel the scowl settle across my face. “That bad, huh?”

“Bunny you sad?” Sophie scoots off my shoulders and into my lap. Her little hands reach up around my neck. “You need a hug.”

I sigh in amusement at her eagerness to make me feel better. Jamie is still waiting for an answer with a determined glint in his eye.

“How d'ya know about them?” I ask, wanting to know what he’s heard.

“Cupcake. She reads a lot, like myths and stuff. When we talked about Jack, she started listing off other spirits in stories that have wintery powers. Like yeti, wendigo, Yuki-Onna… I guess I just wonder if there’s some other wintery powered something causing all this trouble, because it’s kinda focused on us, you know? Maybe someone wants Jack to be blamed for everything?”

It’s a reasonable conclusion, if it is more than just coincidence, but I reckon it could just as easily be their overactive imaginations trying to make sense out of random temperature changes as winter sets in. I smooth down the stray wisps of Sophie’s hair and shift her into a better position, a little unsettled by the thought of the kiddies being targeted. There’s no reason why they would be though. It certainly wouldn’t get anyone into Jack’s good graces and that seems to be Old Man Winter’s primary goal. Can’t see him letting any of the lesser winter elementals muck around and cause problems either.

It’s probably nothing. 

“What do you think, Bunny?” 

“I think you’d best leave the worrying over other spirits to us.” Jamie groans and flops back onto his bed. “You might be making too much of a few weather oddities. No one’s been hurt have they?”

“No,” he sighs, and blows a breath upwards to shift his bangs away from his face. “You should copy my notes though. Just in case.”

Ms. Bennett is rattling around cleaning on the main floor. Sophie mumbles and her even puffs of breath make me think she’s falling asleep. More bloody feelings bubble up when I cradle her closer to settle her. Softer, warmer emotions. I let them float upwards and indulge myself. It feels good. I never did this with the ankle biters at Santoff Claussen. Wouldn’t have had it in me then, and I was a bit intimidated by their unabashed affection to be honest, but little Sophie’s got me by the heartstrings now. 

Ombric had tried to explain it to me once, the feelings of a parent to a child. How he’d come to love Katherine. We’d even argued about whether or not Pitch deserved any sympathy on account of what had happened to his family, and hadn’t that been a row? We hadn’t agreed on much. I think if it came up again, Ombric and I might have more common ground. Not that that’s likely, with him using his Duty as an excuse to avoid the rest of us. 

Right now I’ve got some combination of protectiveness, affection, and longing playing house in my heart. Solitude is all well and good, and I wouldn’t want to do without it entirely, but family’s been on my mind lately. The idea had been seeded in my thoughts after the dust up with Pitch had led to rediscovering the true mates that we Guardians are. Jackie taken it further though, spurring those familial feelings to bloom fully. Home had always been a very physical thing to me and the Warren with its earthy magic had been that home for centuries. Jack had planted himself there and flourished, and where he should have inspired paternal affection something else entirely had grown. He's part of that home now. Our home. That’s why I’d woven him into the magic and given him free reign. 

It felt right. 

He’d even called it home himself a few times. Hope he still thinks that way.

“You know, we’re going to get Jack more believers.” Jamie speaks up, heedless of his sister’s nap.

“Are ya now?” I return quietly, hoping he’ll take the hint.

“Yes! Pippa and Monty are in the school choir. They’re performing at the winter talent show before Christmas break. Pippa found this poem online that she rewrote and they’re going to do it as a Jack Frost song.” He pushes himself up to look me in the eyes. “Do you think he’ll come watch?”

“I’ll see what I can do.” It’s all I can offer. 

“I hope he does. Mr. Taylor said we could make a video of it and post it on the school website. Cupcake volunteers in the kindergarten classes too. She’s been telling them stories about Jack. Maybe he can come visit them sometime so that they can see he’s really real? Anyway, we’re writing the stories down and Monty’s older sister says she’ll make us a blog. Then everyone can read them!”

His enthusiasm is contagious. They’re good ideas, even better coming from the kids themselves. Makes it more likely to catch on properly than having an adult tell them a tale.

“Do you think it will help? I mean, it’s not like you or Santa, but we could totally get some more kids believing.” He’s got so much hope and determination. It’s no wonder Jamie was the last holdout among our believers with a heart like that.

“Jamie, even if ya don’t get a single one, it'll mean the world to Jackie that ya tried.” Jamie smiles brightly at me.

“Jack's going to be okay, right? You’ll take care of him if he won’t come see us? He’s not out there alone again, is he?” If he really doubted, he’d be more serious, but Jamie has faith.

“No. He’s got a place with me now, in the Warren, remember? There’s a room for him at the North Pole too. We’re looking out for him.”

“Good.”

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Wow, Anna can talk. And talk. There’s hardly been a moment of silence since I got here. I’m a bit terrified of what might happen if I introduce her to Toothiana. Also, I have this sinking feeling that she’s been trying to flirt with me. 

The quiet is a relief honestly, when she skips off to harass a snow creature of some kind lifting blocks into place on the outer wall. I’m just not used to hours of chatter. Even Tooth doesn’t go on that long and living with Aster… Remembering quiet evenings in the armchairs of the sitting room at home kind of makes me ache. 

The Snow Queen is quiet beside me, but the air around her glitters with small, perfectly formed snowflakes. Toothiana had said that she and the others were all someone else before becoming Guardians. Did all spirits start off as human beings? Or living people anyway?

“Ummm, your majesty?” I try.

“Yes, Jack?”

“Were you human before all this?“ I ask her. There’s a long pause as she stares at Anna and I’m not sure if she’s going to answer.

“Yes.” Her voice is low, but she doesn’t look at me. “The place where I was born is gone, but I was human once. It was a long time ago.”

“And you chose this? To become a spirit?” There’s the tiniest flinch around her eyes.

“I-“ 

“Jack!’ Anna waves and rushes over. “You won’t believe what they’ve been building.” 

Tawis is standing on top of the wall wearing a smug grin. “I’ve come to save you from being bored to death.”

“I am always onboard for fun.” I try to smile at the Snow Queen, hoping maybe she’ll join in, but she’s already risen and is standing by the doorway into the palace. Oh well.

“Don’t worry about her,” Anna reassures me. “She’s not much for fun anymore. Prefers to keep to herself. Go on.” She shooes me over to the wall. A boost from the wind takes me up to where Tawis is. 

“A little assistance, please?” Anna half demands, so I reach down and grab her hand to pull her up too. 

“So, you want to be white or black?” Tawis asks. On the outside of the wall, two small castle forts in miniature have been built; the walls of one are spattered with dark rocks marking it “black”. Each one has a small tower topped with a gleaming spike of ice. Defend the castle, huh?

“We’ll have uneven teams.” I point out to them.

“Oh, not me. I’d end up toppling my own tower. I’m the referee,” Anna states. “You can divide the snow giants up between yourselves though.”

Anna had explained about the large snowy creatures that were doing all the heavy lifting around the castle. They were formed by winter magic and made to work. They weren’t all that clever though. No souls or life to them either, Anna noted, because they were fueled by the intent of the spell that made them. Father Frost and the Snow Queen were particularly good at it. In contrast, there were smaller winter sprites darting around all over the place. Anna had no trouble herding those when necessary. They were pretty skittish.

The available snow giants wait for our instructions below, but as awesome as having minions sounds, I’m still wary about my powers. 

“Look, I should warn you about my powers. I’ve been having some problems-“

“Oh Jack, stop worrying! It’s not like you can hurt us, is it?” Anna bats her eyes at me.

“She’s right. So are we playing or would you rather go back to staring at the walls?” He snarks at me. I kinda like it. Usually I’m the smart ass.

“We’re playing. Four each?” This could definitely be fun. Tawis nods.

“I’ll take black, since you haven’t said. The object is knock down your opponents tower.”

“Got it.”

“For luck,” Anna kisses my cheek just as I go to I leap down. Oh. So, yeah, that was definitely flirting. 

“Come on Jack!” Tawis yells from below, snapping me out of my unease. 

“Err, yeah. Coming!” He’s laughing at me when I land.

“Shut up.”

“Aww, not fond of Anna, are we?”

“She’s nice and everything,” I glance back where she’s waving for us to get ready, “but she’s not really my type.”

“No?” He smiles and leans down to whisper in my ear. “Good to know.”

Oh. I feel my face flush and he laughs again. He’s teasing me!

“That was unfair.” I yell as he’s backing away towards his tower.

“Do you see a rule book anywhere? No? Neither do I. You’ve got two minutes to prepare, Frost.” He points at me. “Then I’m coming for you.”

“Bring it!”


	12. Chapter 12

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

What the hell? 

Hundreds of fairies surround me. Thousands maybe. And boy do they look mad. Their angry buzzing is drowning out everything else and then they start darting back and forth, pushing and prodding me to move, but I can’t see where I’m going. When they stop, the buzzing and bitter chirping intensifies and the fairies coalesce into a furious Toothiana. Oh no.

“I know what you did with Pitch, Jack,” she spits out at me, feathers ruffled and bright. “You abandoned them.” 

I open my mouth but nothing comes out. My voice is gone. Tooth surges forward and shoves me hard.

“You abandoned me.” 

I shake my head violently, but she doesn’t care. Instead she shoves me again and I realize I’ve been herded to the end of the terrace. Without my staff.

“We can’t trust you with anything,” she hisses and shoves me one last time, making me stumble over the edge. My scream is soundless. There’s a whooshing sensation of air and I end up crashing into the ground. Cool grassy ground.

“Frostbite.” My heart lurches up into my throat. Bunny. I must have opened a portal. I roll over and find myself peering up at him.

“Come crawling back, have ya? I thought my hospitality wasn’t good enough?” He cocks his head to the side and I see a couple sentinels behind him, their battle ready faces turned to me. 

I try to speak again, but my voice is still missing. 

“Said enough already then? I offer up my home and my help and yet somehow I’m the one who’s done you wrong? Should’ve expected as much, what with all your previous lying and sneaking about. Disrespectful brat.” Aster’s contempt for me practically radiates off him in waves, making me wilt in misery. I try to pull myself to my feet, but somehow I can’t get beyond kneeling.

“You’re no different than the rest of’em, Jack. Cold and worthless, Winter is nothing but bleakness and death, which I suppose suits you after all.” Bunny looks down his nose at me. Bracing myself against his anger seems impossible. Braving the boomerangs would be better than this. 

Fuck, why can’t I talk?

I try again, desperate to explain myself, but the second I open my mouth he drops down into a crouch to face me.

“Get out,” he snarls, eyes blazing. Oh God. “Get out and don’t ever come back. And if I find ya in my Warren again, so help me I’ll-” 

I don’t hear him finish, because the ground has already opened up beneath me. I’m tumbling down a shaft, faster and faster, and I can’t seem to grip the edges or stop until I thud against a polished wooden floor and the wind is knocked out of me.

I haven’t even gotten my breath back when the yeti latch onto me. They wrench my arms back, binding my hands and then my feet, before dragging me away. What the hell? I thought we were past this? North is standing by the globe, but he hardly gives me glance, as if I’m not worth his time. 

_North!_

My words are soundless, but I get a good smack for my efforts. I thrash in their grip, but losing it completely, especially in front of the yeti, is not an option. I squeeze my eyes shut to keep in the tears and bite my cheek until I taste blood. Bastards. One of the yeti burbles something and to my horror I hear the smash of a snow globe. They heave me through the stomach-wrenching portal, sending me rolling down a long, steep incline. 

When I finally stop, it’s dark and I’m alone. The bindings have come undone and I think I’m in Antarctica, which is better than I could have got. Could have been the desert. Instead it’s cold and empty and isolated and there aren’t even any penguins around. Just the moon.

No point in asking him for help.

I don’t understand what’s happening. Why now? Tooth has a right and North thinks I murdered yeti by blizzard, and Aster - he can’t hate me. He can’t. He’s just upset. It’ll be different when he calms down. He gave me his magic, to the Warren, and he didn’t take it back, even if he said… 

Somehow I manage to see the glitter of dream sand while I’m blinking away tears. Sandy! Sandy doesn’t have any reason to be upset with me right now, does he? I’ll tell him what happened and maybe he can help. 

I run across the snow, following underneath the trail. I’m not paying attention to where I’m going though and end up sprawled on the ground with a mouthful of grainy snow. 

What did I trip over out here? 

I turn around to look. The wood stands out starkly against the frozen terrain. My staff! 

I clutch it nervously and want to check it over, but the dream sand begins to fade into the distance. I soar upward to track the looping streams as they move, but no matter how far I fly, or which branch I follow, I can’t find Sandy. Is he avoiding me? 

Does everybody hate me now? 

I force myself to try yet another trail and I’m hopeful when this one starts widening, but suddenly it changes and turns black and dark. 

Nightmare sand.

I pull up quickly and circle in the air. I’d been trying so hard to follow the sand I hadn’t noticed when the moon and stars had vanished, and the night had gone silent. The dark trail undulates and shimmers. Crap. The last of the light is fading when a mocking laugh cuts through the quiet and the nightmare sand whips around to-

I wake up gasping and shaking and for a minute I have no idea where I am or what’s going on. 

Then I remember. 

The Winter Court.


	13. Chapter 13

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

_I wake up gasping and shaking and for a minute I have no idea where I am or what’s going on._

_Then I remember._

_The Winter Court._

Great. Another nightmare. Am I that messed up? I try to shake off the rejection and despair that had saturated my dream. I know Pitch is still stuck underground but… yeah. Of course, he is. It was just a bad dream. That’s all. Sleeping sucks. 

I’ve used a lot of power over the past few days, with no problems at all, but it did wear me out. It’s hard to resist showing off when there’s no risk of hurting anybody. Unfortunately, it had caught up with me and I’d needed to rest, which meant sleeping. I rub the heels of my hands hard into my eyes and blearily look around.

I hadn’t expected the Snow Queen to really make up a room just for me though. I’d barely noticed the details when I’d crashed, but now I can see that she definitely put some thought into it. The winter motif is similar to the rest of the castle, with curling frost ferns decorating the ceiling and icy walls glowing with diffused sunlight. One section is a raised mural in shades of white, blue, and black, showing a group of scattered children having a snowball fight. Cute. 

The bed is massive. The frame is carved from ice, with solid head and footboards, though the mattress is something else. I can’t figure out exactly what it’s made of. I’m still wearing my clothes, not having bothered to take them off, but there’s a blanket on the bed half covering my legs. Sitting up, I pull it closer and find it incredibly soft. The warm grey fabric is lush and reminds me of Aster’s fur though I’m pretty sure the blanket itself isn’t real because it’s too perfectly consistent, unlike a real pelt. I press my cheek against it and wonder how Bunny’s doing. Is he still angry? Does he miss me? Dream Aster had been angry and hurt and mean… I sigh into the blanket. I’d left things such a disaster. I hadn’t even told him where I was going. Again.

I wish we'd met years ago, way before ‘68. Maybe if we had, even if he was shifting and all emotional, we’d have gotten a better start. Hell, even if he had been all wound up, I’d have helped him. I wouldn’t have had any duties to worry about and instead of being alone we could have been together the whole time.

Imagining it just makes me sad and achy though, longing for a past that doesn’t exist. Like when I talk to Father Frost about what Manny did, keeping me apart from everyone. Why did he do that? Even if he hadn’t wanted me with the winter spirits, why keep me apart from the other Guardians only to send them to find me later? 

I have to stop thinking about it. It only makes me angry. Or depressed. Guardian of Fun can’t get all down and moody, can he? It’d ruin the one thing I’m good at.

I drop the blanket and force myself onto my feet. My right sleeve is flapping uselessly from my elbow. I tore it during the first snow battle and it's only gotten worse. One of the little sprites had grabbed the dangling cloth yesterday and swung off my arm, causing the stitching to come apart even further. Between that, the seam on my pocket unraveling, and how thin the fabric had gotten in places, I’m not sure my hoodie is going to make it through the winter. It isn’t like I’ve got anything else to wear though. 

Collecting my staff from the hook by the door, I make my way down the corridor and hope I don’t get lost on the way to the Banquet Hall. It’s been pretty good so far, all things considered. Mostly I’ve been spending time with Anna and Tawis, who are a ton of fun. Sometimes the Snow Queen watches. She doesn’t say much. Father Frost and I have talked more too and he’s trying to understand, it’s just that my powers are fine here. Like somehow, because I’m not worried about hurting any of them and couldn’t if I tried, my powers have calmed. I wish I could be sure they’d stay that way when I leave, but I’m not.

When I turn a corner and see the entrance to the Hall, Yuki-Onna steps out from an alcove to block my path. We’ve barely even spoken so I have no idea what she wants. She’s a bit creepy and whenever I see her I’m reminded of Sandy’s warning.

“How are you, Frost-san? Did you rest well?” she asks politely. She can’t know about the nightmare. Maybe this is just small talk? Ugh. I’m no good at that.

“Ummm, yeah. I guess.” I run a hand through my hair to make sure I’m not too scruffy looking. “How are you?”

“Well enough. How are you enjoying your winter self? It must be quite different than when you are acting as a Guardian of Childhood.” I have to admit that her voice is nice, words all smooth and rounded, and that combined with her eerie beauty I can see how a spirit like her might lead people to walk calmly into death by snowstorm. But right now, I’m not even sure of what she’s asking me. Is she fishing for information about the Guardians?

“I am very fond of children myself,” Yuki-Onna continues, smiling unnervingly. Yeah, I bet you are. Probably with wasabi and soy sauce.

“That’s great,” I smile back stiffly. “Kids are awesome.”

“Though I am afraid I cannot say the same for the others,” she adds mysteriously. What the hell does that mean? 

“Other who?” But Yuki-Onna doesn’t answer me. She just glides away down the hall. I don’t understand, isn’t she meeting with everybody else? Why is she even here then?

“Jack!” Anna cries and skips over, pulling me into the hall and embracing me. 

“Hi,” I gasp around Anna’s fierce hug. It’d be nice if I weren’t still kind of worried about the flirting and hurting her feelings. She’s sweet and she’s even toned down the chatter now that she knows how overwhelming it is for me. “Uh, good morning?”

“Good Morning! I just realized that I never even asked you. Do you need to eat?” There isn’t any food on the long dining table formed from cloudy ice, but the Snow Queen and Father Frost sit there deep in conversation. 

“Not really,” I answer. I figured most of them didn’t, because there hadn’t been any meals since I’d arrived. 

“Oh good. We rarely do. It isn’t like we can grow food ourselves. We’d have to steal from humans or barter with other spirits.” Her look of disgust is another sign of how separate the winter spirits are. They don’t get along with outsiders and they prefer it that way. Father Frost has explained that other spirits are generally prejudiced against them and after centuries of conflict, the winter elementals have pretty much opted for stiff civility and avoidance if at all possible. Apparently North and the yeti fall in a grey area, which is why they’ve met a few times, though the way it’s brought up makes me think that Father Frost resents how loyal the yeti are to North.

No food then. Oh well. I enjoy eating most of the time. Aster’s insistence on feeding me regularly has woken up all of those senses and being the primary test subject for his chocolate experiments is a burden I will happily bear. I wonder if he’ll still want to use any of my figures for molds?

“Jack,” Anna nudges me. Oh. Father Frost and the Snow Queen must have finished their conversation because they’re coming towards us. Father Frost hangs back slightly, but her highness swishes to a stop right next to me. No snowy cloak today, just an elegant grey and blue gown. 

“I don’t mean to insult you, Jack, but your clothing is in very poor condition.” The Queen carefully examines the fabric when I lift my arm.

“Yeah. I’ve been meaning to look for something new.” She raises an eyebrow at me. Okay, so my hoodie is a loss. I hate getting new clothes. It’s always a pain. I should have asked North to help me. The others don’t really do clothing.

“Would you mind if I try something?” The Snow Queen asks.

“Umm, sure.” She doesn’t really look like the needle and thread type, but I’m willing to give it a shot. Father Frost smiles at me encouragingly.

Cold forms around me gently, cloaking my body in blue and white. There’s a weird sensation and then my clothing begins to shift around. 

“Hey! What-“ I panic for a moment and clutch my crook. At least it still feels solid. 

“Don’t worry. Your modesty is safe,” the Snow Queen’s lips quirk up a little. Guess she does have a sense of humour.

I glance down and blink. My hoodie is gone. There are the beginnings of a pale tunic and possibly some sort of hood, but then Father Frost coughs and that drops away. Instead a deep blue spreads across my chest and arms, white sparkling down my legs and… ugh. Shoes. 

“Wow, this is-” 

“Much more fitting,” Father Frost nods. “You can do better than to live in cast offs from mortals, Jack.”

It’s definitely different. I can see my reflection in a section of gleaming ice opposite. I do look good. I’m just not sure it’s really me. Particularly the black polished shoes. The pants are crisp and white, paired with a high collared jacket in shades of glacial blue and a sash. The high collar is open, there’s frost detailing similar to my hoodie along the shoulders, and I think there are tails fluttering behind me. Classy. It’s a snug fit. Not exactly what you’d wear to a snowball fight.

“How handsome, Jack.” Anna claps her hands happily. 

“I hope you like it.” The Snow Queen meets my eyes with that flat expression again. She seems almost apologetic. 

“Oh. Yeah. Thanks.” Manners. Right. “Are my old clothes gone?”

“I’ll put them in your room,” she answers and Father Frost grimaces. That’s a bit hypocritical, given his worn ensemble.

“Thanks.” The Snow Queen swirls away in a little flurry and goes to sit with Father Frost at the table again, leaving me with Anna.

My poor staff looks really out of place with the elegant outfit. I am so ditching these shoes the first chance I get. Maybe the jacket too, if the undershirt I can feel against my skin is all right on its own. The whole thing is a lot more fancy than I expected, though I’m kind of living in a castle at the moment, so I guess this is a way to fit in. Still. 

_Shoes._

“I love it when she does clothes,” Anna sighs. She’s wearing the same thing again -same style anyway, but with slightly different colours. Everything she’s worn has been nearly the same, the blouse and skirt, now that I think about it.

“Did she make yours?” I ask.

“Mine are part of my aspect. Magically connected. It’s not like that for everyone. The Queen changes hers all the time. What she made for you is yours now though. It shouldn’t fall apart or disappear or anything.” 

“That’s good to know.” Having my clothes vanish unexpectedly actually hadn’t occurred to me. 

“You look wonderful. Very dashing,” she links her arm with mine, leaning in close.

“Ummm Anna?” Oh man. I have no idea how to have this conversation. 

“Yes, Jack?” Her clear blue eyes peer up at me. 

“I really like spending time with you and everything but- I don’t- I’m not… Man, I am no good at this.” Crap.

“Jack,” Anna laughs, “just spit it out.”

“I just want to be friends.” I blurt out. Damn. “I’m sorry. I’m kind of messed up and awful and I should-“

“Stop!” Anna shakes her head violently. “Jack, if we don’t fit, we don’t fit. You can’t force that. And there’s nothing wrong with you.”

“There isn’t?” There’s pretty much always something wrong with me.

“No.” The bone-crushing hug I get is painfully reassuring. Anna sure isn’t lacking for upper body strength. When she finally lets go I feel a bit lightheaded, but in a good way.

“So, we’re friends?” 

“Friends,” she nods.

“And you aren’t upset?” I fidget a little with my staff. I have to stop that.

“No.”

“How are you so awesome?” I ask disbelievingly. Seriously.

“Jack,” she sighs. “I like you, but a few days of flirting isn’t long enough for you to be able to break my heart.” There’s a little exasperation in her tone, but it sounds fond more than anything. Maybe it is okay.

“Good, because I- I really value our friendship, Anna.” Out of all the other winter spirits I’ve met here, Anna and I definitely get along best. She was trying to impress me at first, I get that now, and once she toned it down we really clicked. Tawis is fun too, but it isn’t as easy with him as it is with Anna. The Snow Queen is distant and Yuki-Onna is just weird. 

“Me too. These past few days have been wonderful. You’ve brought new life to our circle of friends, you know.” Really? I guess I wouldn’t be able to tell.

“Have I?” When she nods I realize that I actually am starting to feel like I fit here. It’s new, but there’s none of the awkwardness that I had at first with the Guardians. I always expected them to be watching me, judging me on how good of a Guardian I was. That stopped after a while, once I got to know them, with Aster especially. But even if I can relax with them now, I do worry about disappointing them. That and the blow up with Bunny are probably what triggered my nightmare in the first place. 

The nightmare where they all let me know their real feelings about me: betrayal, anger, distrust... They’ve never actually said any of those dream things though. I wish I knew how to read people better.

“Jack?” Anna touches my elbow. She looks worried, probably because I’ve been twisting my staff in my hands anxiously. I’m pretty bad at hiding my emotions.

“Are you all right, my boy?” Father Frost asks. 

“Had a bad dream last night. No worries.” Huh. Must have picked that one up from Bunny. Anna escorts me to sit at the table.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He offers like he always does. “Was it like the other?”

“Yeah, it was just more messed up insecurities… I think.”

“You think?” Father Frost rumbles. Whoops. Bad word choice. He’s not going to let me avoid talking about it now, is he? 

“I- At the end of the dream, Pitch was there. Or sounded like he was. I don’t think he can really get into anyone’s head right now though.” Pretty sure, anyway.

“Are you certain? It would be cause for concern if the Boogeyman were to rise again, would it not?” They all look at me expectantly. Guess word of Pitch’s big bid for power has gotten around.

“Maybe.” I think he’d be pretty weak, compared to the Guardians anyway. “I’d have to ask the Guardians-“

“Oh, surely not. Checking his prison would give you peace of mind and be simple enough, wouldn’t it?” 

No. No it would not. I am not going anywhere near that fucking place. Father Frost doesn’t intend to trigger the sharp spike of dread that hits me when he asks about the lair, but there’s no way- I can’t. I just can’t.

“It was just a bad dream,” I insist. “I think I just need to patch things up with Bunny. I didn’t explain myself very well and it’s been weighing on me.”

Father Frost looks unconvinced.

“Why do you have to go see the Easter Bunny?” Anna demands and I cheer internally at the change in topic. Yes, let’s talk about Bunny now, please. “He’s scary, Jack.” 

“Scary?” Intimidating, yeah, but scary? Is Anna afraid of him?

“He hates winter. He’s practically the most powerful spring spirit there is and they’re all so full of themselves. We’re pretty much the lowest of the low as far as they’re concerned. How is he going to treat you now that you’re really one of us?” she challenges me emphatically.

“He’s not so bad. He can even be cuddly sometimes.” Which is true. Aster was almost as awkward about hugs as I was in the beginning, but we’d gotten better at it together. “Bunny’s just used to being alone. He’s really a good person. Besides, I didn’t think he was actually a proper Spring spirit?”

Anna snorts at that.

“You know, I bet he’d totally win you over with his chocolate,” I try. Everybody loves chocolate right?

“I doubt it,” Anna turns to Father Frost and the Queen. “Tell him he shouldn’t go!”

The Snow Queen is still and expressionless, while Father Frost looks at me with a disappointed frown.

“I am concerned with the way they treat you, my boy, and the effect their magic has had on you. However, if that’s what you really want, I’ll take you back to your lake.” His offer is sincere. He isn’t happy though. Crap. 

“Can I still come back?” 

“Of course!” Father Frost exclaims. “You will always be welcome, Jack. If you like, I will take you to your lake and meet you there again when you’re done. That way you won’t have to fly and you can be back in plenty of time for solstice.”

“Thanks, that’d be great.” And just like that a huge weight lifts off me. Maybe I really can have both if I manage settle things with Bunny.

“You couldn’t just write him a letter or something?” Anna grumbles.

“Anna,” the Snow Queen chastises her.

“I’m worried,” she pouts. “You better not be gone long. I have plans.” 

“I won’t be. I promise.” I grin and she scowls at me theatrically. 

Rising from the table, Father Frost motions for me to follow, shuffling to the other side of the room to keep from disturbing the ladies I guess. 

Facing me he puts one hand on my shoulder and the other on my staff, sending hoar frost spreading up the wood. Snow starts to form in the air around us and swirls up into a column. 

Here we go.

A few moments later the snow flutters away and we’re standing on my lake.

“Call me when you need me, my boy,” he rasps, smoothing my hair down with a shaky hand. “Take care.”

“I will.” Father Frost steps back and vanishes into another flurry of white.

It’s quiet and there’s a thin undisturbed layer of snow on the lake. It’s a perfect December day. Maybe I’ll make a quick flyover before going down to the Warren? 

No. Better not. Bunny’s probably been waiting long enough. Besides, I look down at my new outfit; I actually have something to show off. I wonder what he’ll think?

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

My hand jerks and sends the paint pot tipping over, its contents trickling through the grass.

Jack.

He’s home again. That it’s been less than a week makes me more hopeful than it should. I’d reckoned I wouldn’t see him until New Year’s at best. 

Dashing quickly towards my burrow to clean up, I can’t be bothered by the pale orange disaster of my colour experiment. Instead, I wonder where Jack’s been. Not with any of the others, that much I know. He’s come through the Burgess door instead of opening a portal himself. Maybe he’s been to see the kiddies? I think that’d be good for him actually. I checked on them myself yesterday, but there’s been no oddities or disturbances as far as I can tell. Even Jamie hadn’t had any suspicions to report, though he had asked about Jack again. 

When the man himself finally emerges from the tunnel, I miss the expression on his face entirely, because he doesn’t look like my Jackie at all. I freeze in place, gobsmacked by the transformation. 

“Bunny,” he stops a few arm lengths away. 

I’d been over and over it in my head, what I’d say when I saw him again. How I’d be calm and sensible and convincing, explaining how there were no worries about the winter burrow and we’d sort it all out between us. I’d tell him about my past encounters with some of the winter spirits, verifiable truths not speculation, and be more honest about my own feelings.

The flood of emotion at the picture he presents drowns my sense of reason like it’s been tied to a rock and shoved off a pier.

“What the hell are you wearing?” growls out of me before I can think the question through.

Jack’s mouth opens in shock for a moment before he recovers and snaps back, “Why do you care?”

The clothes he’s wearing are all wrong. He doesn’t look like Jack. The fitted jacket and crisp trousers are desperately trying to be regal, but he looks less like he’s being formal and more like he’s being constricted.

Then I notice the shimmer of the fabric.

“Take it off,” I grit out.

“What? Bunny- !”

“Take it off, Jackie. Now!” I reach for him, catching his arm before he can dart away. Jack thrashes in my grip and kicks at my legs, the shoes on his feet obscenely shiny and new. 

“No! Let go!” he demands and I should, but I can’t. Not until I know he’s all right. 

“Where’d ya get them? Who made it?” 

“The Snow Queen. For fuck’s sake Bunny, what’s wrong with you?” He levels his crook at me, the wood frosting over heavily. So that’s where he’s been. He’d run off with Old Man Winter to wherever he and his lot hide themselves away.

“Those aren’t normal clothes,” I point out, but could he really be that unaware?

“No shit! She made them, you know, with magic?” And doesn’t that make my fur stand on end? Jack is livid and completely taken aback by my concern on account of he’s got no real understanding of magic, no idea what letting something like that be worked on him could mean.

“You took magical clothes from a bloody stranger? Do ya have any idea how dangerous that is? Ya don’t know what kind of enchantments she’s woven into-“ He interrupts me with half a face’s worth of slush, wrenching his arm back and pulling free. The icy wetness does nothing to cool my temper.

“Are you nuts?” Jack rounds on me furiously. “There’s nothing wrong with them! Father Frost was right there watching. He wouldn’t have let her do anything bad.”

“Because Old Man Winter is such a -“

“Stop it, Bunny! I can decide for myself who I want to trust. Why do you have to be so suspicious of everyone?” The angry hurt in his eyes brings me up short.

Trust. Right, because Jackie doesn’t trust my judgment on anything anymore does he? Not with Winter whispering in his ear. This is exactly what I’d wanted to avoid, and as much as I ache to shout out my frustrations, I can’t. There’s nothing to do but ruthlessly quash those feelings and try a new tack.

“Forget it. Yer right.” If I’m lucky, Snowflake might listen to me for minute.

“I am?” No, but yelling will just drive you away again. I sigh and back off a ways. Time to eat crow. At least it’s partly genuine. I am sorry for upsetting him. 

“I’m sorry, mate.” I apologize.

“Sure you are,” he responds. His disbelief grates on me, but I take it in stride. At least he’s downgraded from mad as a cut snake to warily cranky.

“It’s a rough go, takin’ this in Jack. Ya look-” I try and explain, having no real words for what I’m trying to say that won’t get him all riled up again. He looks like he’s been dressed up and collared, nothing like the playful free spirit that he is.

“I look good. You’ll just have to cope, Bunny. This is who I am okay?” Who he is? Can he not see it? He’s determined enough about it to make a stand, so maybe not.

“Fine.” This is so bloody wrong. Damned Old Man. 

“Good,” he nods. “Everyone doing okay?”

“Not really, no.” I take a little pleasure in Jack’s stricken reaction and immediately feel guilty for worrying him. “Ah, well. It’s nothing horrible. No other incidents with the kiddies. Yer burrow’s a bit of a write off.”

“Yeah, I overreacted. It’ll melt though,” he replies, jaw set, like he’s waiting for me to ream him out. Instead I keep my mouth shut and we descend into awkward silence. 

Ah, hell.

“It’s been awful quiet since ya took off, Jackie.” 

“I was just so angry, Bunny.” He flails a little, like he’s going to hop up on his staff and realizes that he can’t do it in those tailored daks he’s wearing. So he begins to pace, which is an odd picture, the ridiculous tails of his jacket flapping behind him. “You weren’t listening to me at all. I don’t want to fight with you.” 

“I know,” because I feel the same way. Last thing I want is more strife between us. Just the opposite.

“The clothes aren’t that bad, are they?” he asks me hesitantly.

“Bit fancy,” I try. “I mean, shoes?”

“I’m trying something new,” he answers, but there’s a bit of sulk in his tone. So he doesn’t actually like them. Yeah, that settles some of my unease. He’ll have most of that get up gone by the end of the week.

“You were off with Old Man Winter then?” Jack nods. “Had a good time?”

“Yup.” And that’s all he offers for details. 

“Well, we missed ya around here. I’m glad to have ya back.” The guilty expression on his face twists my heart, but it’s only there an instant before he shutters it behind that set jaw again.

“I’m not back to stay. I just wanted to make sure we were good.” 

“What d’ya mean?” I snap, my hopes squashed down as quickly as they’d risen.

“I’m going back to the Winter Court. There’s a Winter Solstice celebration that I want to be there for.” They’re holding Court for the solstice? That’s a few weeks from now. 

“Ya won’t be around at all? What about your believers?” I ask. It’s not like him. Jack had hated not seeing the kiddies over the summer. Even worrying about his powers, I’d have thought he want to stay closer, check up on them from afar, that sort of thing. 

“What about them, Bunny? I can’t risk hurting the kids right now. You know that. I need to work out my winter self. Until then…” He fidgets with his staff. All right. So the Old Man hasn’t been able to sort out his powers yet. 

“They’re worried about ya, mate. They want to help. So do we. You don’t have to do it alone, Jackie.”

Jack blows out a breath and turns away, digging his staff into the dirt and mussing up his shoes. He won’t meet my eyes. 

“Maybe after the solstice. I’ll ask one of the others to go with me as back up. Father Frost or Anna. Bet she’d like the kids.”

“Anna?” Who the hell is that?

“She’s a friend,” he answers defensively.

“And the others?”

“Anna,” Jack sighs, ticking them off on his fingers. “Father Frost, the Snow Queen, Tawis…” Tawis, where have I heard that before? And where is the Court now anyway? They haven’t convened for ages.

“Oh, and Yuki-Onna, though she’s not really a friend.”

“I should hope not. Yuki-Onna’s aren’t exactly the friendliest lot, though there aren’t many left-” 

“Bunny.” The warning in Jack’s voice chills the air.

“Fine. Nevermind.”

I’m left at a loss now. He’s not come home at all. He’s just stopped by to let me down gently. Jack’ll be gone for weeks while these new “friends’ of his get their hooks in.

“Are ya still coming to the New Year bash?” I ask him tentatively. New Year’s was supposed to be a big deal. North was throwing a party for the Guardians. Our first year together as a team must be celebrated! he’d said. Likely with a great deal of vodka. Of course, the actual anniversary won’t be until closer to Easter. Still, Jackie wouldn’t miss that, would he?

“I’m not sure. Probably. Maybe. Not if you’re just going to gang up on me,” Jack rambles uncomfortably. 

“All right then,” I swallow the unhappy lump in my throat. “D’ya want ta take a look at your figures before ya go? Thought you might want some of them for Christmas.”

“Yeah, okay.” He blinks at me, as if suspicious of my offer and lack of offense.

I give up on the conversation and we quietly walk towards the firing room, keeping a careful distance. For a moment the unhappy lump tries to jam itself back upwards, making my eyes water, but no good will come of that. Jack’s decided to be done with this place, and me, and no amount of fretting about it will change anything. I breathe deeply and watch the elegant cloth that cloaks his frame.

I suppose my Christmas present won’t be needed anyway. He won’t even be here.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

The kiln room is cool, thankfully. The shelves are cluttered with works in various stages, but I can see right away where Bunny has made space for mine. I’m having a lot of trouble understanding him right now. Nothing makes sense.

I set my crook down, leaning against the earthen wall, and examine the figures. Most of them turned out pretty good. I could never fire them myself. The kiln makes me nervous when it’s on. Aster doesn’t mind doing it though.

Looking over my shoulder I notice how hesitant his smile is. Everything’s gotten messed up again. Why do we always fight? Aster was the one who’d inspired me to try my hand at art, a hobby for when when I was bored in my off-season. The Southern hemisphere doesn’t have nearly as active a winter as the North does. I enjoyed it too. I won’t have the chance to throw or shape clay again for a while now. Or have dinner with him. Or get a hug.

Stop it, I chastise myself. I’m not a child and I don’t need to be coddled, even if I want… No. I’d better just pack things up and leave. 

“There’s a box there if ya need it,” Bunny points out. 

I pick a few things and gently pack them into the small box below the shelf. Unfortunately, some of my items are a bit higher than I can get to without risking knocking something else over. Aster's hand brushes against my own when he reaches to help, the short fur there rasping against my skin, and my heart stutters in my chest. An intense light and warmth fills my senses. The rush is exhilarating and terrifying and I actually have to stop myself from just-

"Jackie?" Aster asks in alarm and shifts closer.

Shoving myself back instinctively, I flounder until I find my staff, the flushed confusion vanishing the instant my fingers curl around it. A few steadying breaths help too. I wish I didn't rely on it so much. I lean on my crook, setting it in front of me, though it feels less like a cane and more like a shield.

“All right, Snowflake?” Those green, green eyes roam over me. Is he worried? Does he still think I’m pathetic and incapable of taking care of myself? I don’t need him. I don’t.

"I- I'll send you a message if I need anything, okay?" Maybe Anna was right. A letter would be easier. At least then he wouldn't affect me so much. 

"Yeah," Bunny sighs tiredly. "What should I tell-"

"No," I snap and his eyes go wide. "They're all busy, Bunny, especially North. They won't miss me for a few weeks." 

"I was talking about the kids," he frowns in alarmed concern. “Jamie’s been asking-“

"I'll make it up to them. To him."

"That's not what I-"

"I have to go," I cut him off and escape the room, down the hall, scrambling out of the burrow as quickly as I can. I can hear him saying something behind me, but I ignore it and get to the Burgess door as fast as I can without being able to summon the Wind.

The air is shockingly cold and crisp when I get up top. Not that I feel chilly or anything, but I can sense the temperature even if it doesn’t bother me. Winter is definitely here, like it should be. 

I will my power through my staff to call Father Frost, the anxiety of the last few minutes slowly draining away. Damn. I left the figures behind. That must have been what Bunny was trying to tell me. Oh well.

I know I should get back to the lake to meet Father Frost, but Bunny’s words about the kids circle in my thoughts. Maybe just one loop over the town. He’s been checking up on them while I’ve been gone and I’m grateful, because I know he’ll do that no matter what happens between us. The kids should be mad at me but apparently they aren’t. I don’t get that. I do miss them though. I wish…

Jamie’s neighbourhood is right below me. It’s late in the day and- what? Peering below, I can see the snow rippling, or maybe it’s the shadows cast by the setting sun. Whatever it is, it looks weird. Swooping down lower, I keep an eye out for any believers. For a moment I think I see something out of the corner of my eye, a fluttering sheet of white, but when I turn… nothing. 

I must be seeing things.

I’d better get back before one of the kids spies me flying over. 

“Everything all right, my boy?” Father Frost is waiting at the lake when I land.

“Yeah, I guess.”

“Easter has upset you again. You shouldn’t take what he says too much to heart, Jack. It’s not as though he sees you properly,” Father Frost shakes his head sadly.

“I don’t understand.”

“When you first met, he misjudged you badly, did he not?”

“Yeah,” Easter ’68 went pretty badly, “but we got past that.”

“Did you?” he asks. “He went from thinking you were a malevolent spirit to seeing you as the Guardian of Fun, chosen by the Man in the Moon. But you are neither of those things, not solely. You are an elemental winter spirit and have been for centuries, deeply connected to the season no matter how much he denies it. He dismisses so much of your character, my boy. How can he truly love or hate someone he does not know? What right does the Easter Bunny have to judge you, when all he sees is what he chooses to?”

“I- love?” 

“Jack, it is clear to me that the two of you have become close, but don’t mistake gratitude for love. He may seem like your first friend and perhaps more, but you have so much yet to see and do, my boy.”

I don’t think that it’s gratitude. Not the way I feel, or the things I want, want and hope for… maybe he’s right about it being the first time that I feel this way though. It’s not like Bunny’s going to reciprocate anyway.

“He wanted to know if I’d be at the New Year’s celebration at The Workshop.”

“Hmmm. You know as well as I do that they’ll only take the opportunity to pressure you, mold you into what they think you ought to be. With your current difficulties, maybe you should take some time to yourself to ensure that you know what you truly want?”

“Maybe.” Standing there lost in thought, having it all seems pretty far away now. So much for being hopeful. 

A moment later Father Frost emits a low groan. He’s gone pale and is swaying slightly. Oh no. I hurry to support him, sliding my shoulder under his arm to keep him upright. 

“Whoa. Hey, are you all right?” Shouldn’t he be stronger now that winter’s taking over?

“Thank you,” Father Frost leans against me. “I am sorry, my boy. Sometimes I find myself reaching too far and end up feeling the weight of my age. My power isn’t what it once was.”

“Is all this travelling wearing you out? I’m sorry. I’ll fly back-”

“No, no, Jack. It’s all right. I just need a moment, if you do not mind?” He asks weakly.

“I don’t mind. Anything I can do to help.” Seriously. He’s done so much to help me. I don’t want him to suffer because of it. 

“I am grateful for your support, dear boy. I’m don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Then it’s a good thing I’m going home with you, right?”

“Yes, Jack. It is indeed.”


	14. Chapter 14

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Sitting on the edge of the west-facing parapet, I watch the sun slowly rise above the horizon. It’s a new moon. I’m going to choose to believe that means Manny can’t spy on me. Solitude had been a rare thing these past… wow. It’s been almost two weeks since I saw Aster. Two weeks since the winter spirits here decided I needed support, which seemed to mean almost constant surveillance. 

I know they’re just trying to take care of me and make me feel like one of the family, but it’s too much, too soon. I feel like a disappointment, not being as eager as they are to be always together. I’ve really started to appreciate the Snow Queen. She’s content to just sit quietly with me, like Aster and I used to, and it’s nice. Plus, she doesn’t mind that I ditched the shoes.

I curl my toes against the ice brickwork and revel in the sensation. I’ve rolled up my pants to get them out of the way as well, because I can’t grip anything properly otherwise. I wonder if it would be too much if I lost a few buttons off the collar? Father Frost might not let that slide. He still grumbles about the shoes.

I’m glad he hasn’t had another episode since the lake though. Anna was really upset when we got back. She blames Aster, because Father Frost was worn out by helping me and my problems are all Bunny’s doing as far as she’s concerned. It’s not true. It’s my fault, but for once no one is willing to let me take any of the blame at all.

Father Frost and I have been working on my powers daily. I’ve been learning so much from him. He hasn’t brought up Bunny again thankfully, even if he is encouraging me to spend more time with Anna and Tawis. Anna is as awesome as ever, even if she worries too much. Tawis is… not flirty like Anna was, but different. Closer. 

I’m not sure what to think about him, but I remember what Father Frost said at the lake, about figuring out what I really want. He’s attractive I guess, tall and with a lean kind of strength. He doesn’t like Bunny either. 

I haven’t decided yet about New Year’s. The Guardians might be hurt, or just as likely pissed off, if don’t show up…

My solitude is cut short by the skittering noise coming from the tower. Sprites. They’re annoying. Not cute at all and they bite. I’d had to pry them off a reindeer earlier. It wasn’t like they were going to eat it. They just wanted to torment the poor thing. If this is what outsiders mostly see from winter seasonals, I don’t blame them for being wary. Little assholes.

I swing my staff around at them when they emerge but they don’t seem to care. They leap and jump, laughing as they go. It suddenly occurs to me that this is what Bunny had thought of me when we’d first met, like I was some oversized winter sprite causing havoc and not giving a shit about anything.

“Frost-san?” Yuki-Onna appears behind the swarm of sprites. A yuki-onna. Aster had said there were more of them. Did they all fade out except this one? “Enjoying the evening?”

“Yeah,” I answer, watching the sprites scatter away from her. Huh. Sandy had warned me off Yuki-Onna. Aster had only labeled her unfriendly, but the sprites had clearly figured out she was not to be messed with. Maybe each one was different? “Do you have sisters?”

“Why yes,” she said, her eyes widening. “How perceptive.”

“They don’t join in here, do they?”

“Oh, they have friends among those here, but they have other priorities. Not like you and I.”

“What priorities?”

“We have more in common than you think, Frost-san,” she bows slightly and floats away. That is not how a conversation is supposed to go. Blah blah, mysterious comment, exit stage right. Come on.

“Hey Yuki?” She stops and looks back at me, her dark hair starkly framing her face. “Do you ever explain anything?”

“Does anyone?” she replies. I roll my eyes at her non-answer. She doesn’t care and when Yuki-Onna slips away into the next tower, the annoying ice imps come back. 

Forget this. I leap off the parapet and float down into the courtyard. 

“Good morning, Jack.” I jump at the voice. The Snow Queen is sitting near the palace wall under an arching canopy of dripping curling ice that keeps her hidden from most angles. Guess she wanted some peace and quiet too.

“The others are busy making solstice preparations,” she says. Today she’s wearing a blue gown, glittering with ice crystals. Her pale hair is swept back in a plait that curls over her shoulder.

“Oh.” I stand there for a moment, not really sure what to do. Does she want me to stay or go?

“Come and sit with me,” she gestures to the bench she’s seated on. “I’d like to see more of your magic, if you don’t mind indulging me?”

“Really? You’ve been at a lot of the training sessions. You’ve probably seen everything,” I say, ducking through the hanging ice. Father Frost had trained her too, long ago. I’m pretty sure he’s older than the rest of us combined.

“Not that,” she taps my staff with a long pale finger. “Your magic. From your centre.”

My centre? I gently lean my staff against the wall and let it go. The Snow Queen nods. I sit down next to her.

“Right. So, there’s this I guess.” A happy flake forms at my fingertips. Father Frost doesn’t seem to care if I develop this sort of magic. Not that it’s dangerous or anything. It’s totally the opposite. Interesting, but ultimately pretty useless to a spirit like Father Frost, who can put a leash on a blizzard. Somehow I’m different than most of them that way. Anna and Tawis both tried, but neither of them could generate so much as a sparkle. It must have something to do with how I was made. The Man in the Moon, he probably knows. 

“What does it do?” The Snow Queen reaches out tentatively, but doesn’t quite touch it. 

“Uh, it makes people happy? Happier? More likely to want to have fun anyway,” I shrug.

“What a wonderful gift,” she says, like she really means it. Cool.

“Thanks,” I say softly, letting it spin away into the air. Aster was the only one who’d really paid attention to the happy flakes. He’d actually been impressed at their effect and I’d been looking forward to using it in some epic snowball battles this year until my powers had gone haywire and ruined everything. 

What are we anyway? Aster and me? We’d had fun and enjoyed each other’s company, and I’d done dishes and helped with the chocolate. He wouldn’t have let just anybody do that. And he’d gotten Jamie to make that family tree… Things friends do. Only, that wasn’t how I felt now, like friends. 

Mates – what a totally a loaded word. 

Father Frost is trying to help. He doesn’t want me jumping into a relationship that’s probably just going to blow up in my face, spring and winter. Plus, Aster’s a giant rabbit Pooka alien spirit creature. He might not even be able to think of me that way. And if humans do work for him he’ll probably want someone more serious or smart or, well, female.

I wouldn’t mind though. I like his fur. I love his smile. I can’t stop watching how he moves and talks and I think about mate related things way too much. I wish I hadn’t been so stupid about it in the Warren. I should have just accepted his apology and gotten a damned hug. At the time though, the last thing I’d wanted was for him to touch me. Except in the kiln room. That had been… weird.

I’m still unsure if I’m the only spirit who feels this way. I open my mouth to say something about it to the Snow Queen and then stop. I shouldn’t dump my problems on her. She doesn’t miss my aborted attempt though.

“Is there something you wanted to ask?” she says delicately. Fuck it. She’s probably the only one here who hasn’t gone off about how much she dislikes Aster.

“So I used to watch humans, which sounds kind of creepy, but I did.” I think back to the last time I’d looked in on Steve and James, when Sandy had caught me. “I’d watch friends and families. Couples too. I’d watch them at home or on dates, how they were together, and it wasn’t always perfect but they made each other happy, you know? I envied that. I thought I wanted it too, someone to be close with and to share everything with. Love and comfort and joy… You understand, right?” She nods at me with a sad smile.

“I was hoping I might find it with Bunny, but- but it isn’t working. When we’re apart I miss him a lot, but when we’re together all I can think about are the problems, the things that go wrong, and I don’t know why! Maybe it’s just because I’m such a fuck up. I can’t keep myself from ruining the good-“

“Jack, it’s all right,” she says.

“No, it’s not. I’m not.” I’m really not all right. I don’t know if I ever have been. This past summer in the Warren, after I’d recovered from Pitch but before I’d gone topside and destroyed the oak? That had been the only time things had felt right. Just me and Bunny.

“Did you ever- I mean. You said you were human once?” She nods. “Did you have a family?”

“I did. I never married or had children, but I was an aunt. There were people I cared about before and… after,” the Snow Queen says, her voice drifting off. She wraps her arms around herself in a way that looks like she’s cold, though I know she’s not. The temperature has plummeted and snowflakes are forming in the air around us. I want to ask what happened to them, but I don’t. “I had a sister.”

“Were you the oldest?”

“Yes. Though I wasn’t any good at it. She was very forgiving.” 

“I wasn’t either at first, from what I can remember. My little sister Bekah was a lot younger than I was. I think I resented her. That changed as we got older and my father died. I saved her from going through the weak ice of the lake, that’s how I became a spirit. I got her to safety but I went under and,” I gesture to myself, “Jack Frost.”

“You sacrificed yourself to save her,” the Snow Queen puts a hand to her mouth. “That was an act of true love, Jack.”

“It’s the best thing I ever did. I don’t think it makes me special, though. Lots of people would do something like that. It doesn’t mean I deserve this,” I say, making another happy flake and balancing it in my palm. 

“Magic like yours isn’t simple spell work. You need a source, a well-spring of emotion to draw upon. You have a good heart and what you can do is remarkable. I can see why the Guardians value you.” She’s so earnest. It sort of makes sense. Bunny’s centre is Hope. Everything he does comes from his optimism, his hopeful nature. Even after losing his entire people he carried on trying to help humanity and make a difference. But Fun isn’t like Hope. Fun isn’t going to change the world.

I let the happy flake twirl away from my hand and it lands in a puff of glitter against the cheek of the Snow Queen. She starts like she’s been slapped. Then she smiles slowly and tears spill down her cheeks.

“Aww, see? I made you cry.” I put a hand on her shoulder and she immediately covers it with her own. 

“No, Jack. No,” she shakes her head, tiny blue snowflakes tumbling out of her hair. “Not all tears are bad. I wish I could-“

A couple of the hanging icicles snap and tumble to the ground, disturbing the quiet of the moment. The little jerks are back, zipping around the courtyard cackling. On the far side I think I see someone else, but it’s hard to make out because of the way the ice gleams in the morning light.

When I look back at the Queen, her tears have frozen and are flaking off her skin. She straightens her back, smoothing out the wrinkles from her grey-blue gown. 

“Uh-“ I pull my hand back as she pins up her hair with a spike of ice.

“We should go inside and find the others, Jack.”

“Oh. Okay.”

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

I crouch outside the Bennett’s house, waiting for Baby Tooth and thinking how badly I’d mucked up seeing Jackie again. The way he’d held himself away from me, stiff and awkward, like we weren’t the mates we are. Maybe we aren’t anymore. It’s an awful thought and its been rattling around in my head since he’d left, but there’s still a sliver of hope. There always is. 

Of course, my first instinct had been to withdraw, to try and get my bloody feelings under control. The last time I’d done that I’d hermited myself away for a good half a century until Sandy’d come down to give me a “talk”. This time I’d been saved by the kiddiewinks unintentionally nipping that possibility in the bud by knocking on that bloody statue nearly non-stop. I hadn’t taken it too serious to start, Jamie being the imaginative boy he is, but then something had felt off. 

Most of the incidents, as Jamie refers to them, centre on Jackie's believers. Every time the cold comes it’s unnatural and focused, and every time the culprits are long gone when I get there. They’ve left behind evidence though, more than enough to make clear that Jamie's theories aren't flights of fancy. Icy shards, half frozen puddles and so on. Then not an hour ago, whoever or whatever it is partly froze Abby’s feet to the ground and, as little love as I have for the beast, the dog’s injuries have devastated Jamie and Sophie. 

Something is preying on the children here. Not enough to permanently harm them, but it might go that way yet if this keeps on all winter. They’ve got to be hiding away somewhere nearby. 

Baby Tooth chirps in my ear, announcing her presence. Toothiana had let her off regular duties to help me with this. She’ll be our eyes in the sky while we hunt whatever is harassing the kiddies.

"We’re going hunting for this thing and I figure the forest around the lake is our best bet. Right?” We’d talked over the possibility earlier, before Abby had been injured. Baby Tooth knows what to do.

She nods seriously and flits ahead of me. Best-case scenario, this is just random elementals having a bit of mean-spirited fun. I actually hope that’s the case, because if it isn’t? One of Jackie's friends is likely involved. Whichever it is, I’m not letting anyone put the kiddies in danger.

There's a crisp layer of snow on the ground when we cross into the thicket of trees. The leaves are long gone. Light flurries drift by on the breeze and I can hear a familiar chatter. Sprites. Ruddy little imps.

A flash of silvery white catches my eye just as Baby Tooth lets out a loud squeal of alarm. Rebounding off an oak, I find her in the branches with one of those little winter menaces whipping along on the wind after her. I send a boomerang that way and the sprite screeches. Three more of them appear in short order, hissing wildly. Baby Tooth dives down to hover at my shoulder as the boomerang smacks back into my palm, twittering her anger and brandishing a wee dagger. She takes after her mother all right.

The sprites aren’t a true threat, not to me, and they ought to know it, but it can’t be a coincidence that they’re here in Burgess spending their cold chaos on Jackie’s believers. I watch them skitter around warily. Any moment now-

They bolt. 

Baby Tooth picks one out and pursues it fiercely, leaving me to race after. One’s as good as any other. The ground here is frosted over, sparse grass crunching beneath me. Watching the air, I can track the sheen of her feathers better than the pale form of the sprite or the flapping rags it wears. Banking sharply, I pull up short to find the thrashing sprite pinned to the trunk of a Virginia pine. Baby Tooth grins at me proudly and she doesn’t flinch at the sleet the sprite is flinging about in its rage. Another sign that being Named by Jack Frost has had more particular effects than just empowering her with individuality. She’s got another inch on her height again too. 

“Nicely done,” I nod at her. Let’s see what’s going on. I close in on the sprite, its pale grey body contrasting sharply with cinnamon-brown patches of bark on the tree. “What have you got to say for yourself?”

The sprite hisses and spits nonsensically, limbs flailing. I can’t make out a single word. They might be lesser elementals but they can communicate properly when they want to. They aren’t even typically this nasty. Mostly they cause harm by carelessness, which could almost explain the car accident, but combined with the other incidents? Yeah, they’re doing this on purpose.

It thrashes about again on Baby Tooth’s dagger and its eyes darken. Rippling shadows of dark magic flicker in the crystalized features. It sets my heart racing. Then the sprite surges up and pushes against the blade, shrieking horrendously until the sound is cut off by a sharp blow. Shattering against the bark, the body comes apart around the blade and falls to the ground.

I’d killed the thing without even thinking.

My hands are shaking. Fearlings. That’s what the mindless winter sprite had reminded me of. Even Pitch’s dark sandy Nightmares hadn’t managed to touch those memories, being of a different nature entirely. 

Baby Tooth twitters at me with concern.

“I’m fine. Listen, you better head back to reassure the kiddies,” I say, continuing before she can protest. “I’ll bury the pieces and meet you there later. Go on.”

She looks at me for a long moment and then pries her blade from the tree before flying off.

What a mess. Hopefully they won’t be back, not that I’d mind another go at questioning one. What the hell is this all about anyway? 

I can’t feel too guilty about the sprite. Probably did the little bugger a favour. Picking up the pieces, there’s definitely darkness there, but it isn’t Pitch. I know that much. If someone’s perverted the nature of a handful of sprites, why set them on Jackie’s believers? It doesn’t make sense. Against us, yeah, I expect Old Man Winter’s set would be happy to see the Guardians kept busy and away from their goings on, but they like Jack. At least, Jack seemed to think so. Father Frost and his “my boy” was surely intended to be taken as such.

Who could it be? Who else had he mentioned? I try to recall what he’d said as I bury the remains of the sprite in the hard earth. He’d named Anna, whoever that is, and the Snow Queen who’s mostly harmless as far as I’ve been able to tell. Bloody Yuki-Onna, one of them at least and aren’t they a mixed bag? And Tawis. I’d heard that name somewhere, Tawiskaron maybe? Though Teharonghyawago ought to have his trickster brother well in hand. Might be worth seeking out the Sky-Holder to ask.

I finish my task and I’m almost at the tree line when the Warren twigs my senses. Something's poking around one of the fixed entrances, the one by the lake. Jack, maybe? Is he here?

I hurry to the hidden doorway and take a cautious look around. There’s not a soul nearby, but there’s a piece of paper tacked to a tree that has “Bunny” scrawled across it. Unfolding the note, the message is short and blunt: 

_Please come.  
Hardangerjøkulen. _

Jack. He’d said he’d send a message if he needed anything. What did this mean? Did he just want me there or was he in trouble?

Hell, what did it matter? I’d be going, wouldn’t I? 

I slip back into the Warren and get ready. No sense in going unprepared, especially not if we’re meeting on a glacier. This isn’t a quick trip to North’s so clothing is probably worth the trouble too. I take the time to gather a few pieces of Jack’s favourite chocolate experiment, because a sweet peace offering never hurt, and some unobtrusive weaponry in case things aren’t all roses. Someone had sent those sprites, hadn’t they? Maybe this was connected. Packed and prepared, I bound down the tunnel and emerge into a still frozen landscape. 

It isn’t Jack who greets me when I arrive.

“Where’s Jack?” I snap at her.

“Are you always so rude? I’m Anna,” she curtseys mockingly. She looks younger and more twee, but I know Morena when I see her.

“I know exactly who you are- wait,” the realization hits me harder than the chill of the air. “Jack’s Anna?” 

“That’s right,” she says, a dark grin marring the pink-cheeked innocence of her face. “Short for Marzanna. I rather like it.”

Morena, Marzanna, whatever name she chooses, she’s still a creature of cold and darkness and fear. 

“He doesn’t know what you are,” I growl and she laughs. It’s been a long time since we tangled. 

“Maybe he just doesn’t care?” 

“If you hurt-“ but I don’t get to finish, because Morena sends a sweeping wave of ice and snow at me. Dodging to the side, I grasp an egg from my bandolier and fling it in her direction. The resulting burst of powdery colour gives me enough cover to race towards the edge of the glacier and get out of the open. My green coat sticks out something fierce.

The fight accelerates from there. Snow and ice fly in my direction, but not in a very controlled way. I’m able to get in more than a few hits, sticking close to the rocky terrain that juts above the snow line, keeping her at bay and wearing her down. Morena isn’t that dangerous from a distance. It’s her clawed grasp I need to avoid. But she doesn’t move for the strike, not even when I give her an opening to do so. 

Something’s not right.

Then she screams.

“Please! Please stop hurting me!” she cries and the snow around us whips up until I can’t see my hand in front of my face.

“Stay where you are!” The Old Man’s voice booms. 

When the blowing snow drifts down, I see Morena curled up on the ice, sobbing and flinching away from me in fear. What the hell is she-

“Bunny?” My head snaps around so fast it hurts. Jack. “Bunny what did you do?”

He’s standing on an outcropping of rock next to Old Man Winter and a pale woman who must be the Snow Queen. Another longhaired man strides over towards Morena. Tawiskaron.

“Back off, Rabbit,” he snarls at me, but I ignore him in favour of focusing on Jack.

“She’s not who ya think she is.” Old Man Winter scoffs. 

“She is Marzanna, or simply Anna to us. She’s a Slavic winter spirit, Easter, of which you are well aware. Have you come to drown her? Or burn her first perhaps?” He’s twisting everything.

“What are ya on about? She’s a vicious-“

“Don’t, Bunny,” Jackie interrupts. “Just stop!”

“Ya can’t trust her.” 

“She’s my friend, Bunny, and you hurt her,” the pained disbelief in Jack’s voice cuts through me. 

“It’s not what it looks like. I didn’t come here for a fight.” I try to say more but Tawiskaron sideswipes me with a clump of ice. 

“Just like when you first met Jack right? Attack first, ask questions later?”

“Jack, I wouldn’t come out here just ta-“ I step towards him and he lifts his staff defensively with a shaking hand.

“Leave us alone,” he says, but I keeping moving towards him cautiously. 

“Ya don’t understand. Please, Jackie.”

“Bunny,” he warns, but I reach out to him anyway. I’m not going to let them do this to us. “I said stop!”

I realize what’s about to happen a fraction of a second before it does. A bolt of electric blue cold shoots out from Jack’s staff and hits me in the chest. It doesn’t send me flying back but it doesn’t stop either. Instead it crackles along my fur, the surge of power building and spreading quickly. I can’t move, but I can feel the intensity of the numbing ice as it traps me in place. 

“Jack-“ I gasp. 

The last thing I see before I’m sealed in is the look of horror on his face.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

“No!” Oh God. No. What did I do? I scramble away from him. “No, no, no, no…”

Bunny is almost completely hidden inside a column of cloudy grey ice. All that shows is a corner of the long green coat I’d always wanted to see him wearing. 

_Aster._

“Jack-“ The Snow Queen reaches towards me.

“Don’t touch me!” I reel back. My staff is still frosted over with power, trembling in my hand. I panic and fling it away. “My powers- I didn’t mean to-“

“My boy, stop.” Father Frost seizes my shoulder. 

“Did I kill him?” my voice breaks. For a long moment they’re silent, and then a loud crack sounds through the air in answer. The pillar of ice where Aster is cracks again and explodes. Ice and snow fly into the air, forcing us to duck.

“Where is he?” 

“He’s gone,” the Snow Queen answers Father Frost, lifting a hand to disperse the remaining snow, “but he’s left something behind.”

Throwing off Father Frost’s grip, I stumble in getting to where Aster had been. A yellow flower bobs in the wind. A tunnel. He’d been able to open a tunnel. Relief sends me to my knees. A handful of chocolates are scattered across the ground. I blink back my tears and with shaky hands carefully pick the sweets out of the snow.

“I have to go. I have to try and find him. What if he’s hurt?” I say, looking to Father Frost for guidance. I could open a tunnel and go right now. Father Frost frowns.

“He has the other Guardians to help him, should he need it. He won’t welcome you at the moment, I’m sure, and I’m not inclined to overly sympathize given what he’s done to Anna.”

“Anna,” I should have remembered. Tawis is crouched next to Anna where she’s half sitting, blouse and skirt torn from the fight. She moans softly as he picks her up. “You’re okay, aren’t you?”

She doesn’t answer me.

“Take her back to her room to recover,” Father Frost orders him. “We’ll talk about what happened later.”

“Is it bad? What can I do? I don’t know what to do.” Father Frost steps in front of me, filling my vision and pulling me to my feet. He gently tilts my chin so that I met his eyes.

“It will be all right, my boy,” he says gently. “Trust in me.”

“Okay.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry all. My hard drive got corrupted and it took a while to get my files back. Hopefully I'll get chapters out more quickly. Let me know what you think - I'm extremely curious how things are being interpreted so far.
> 
> Also - Possible trigger warning. Pretty mild. See the end notes if you want to know details.

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

My crook rests against the wall, still spiky with hoar frost. I can’t bring myself to touch it. I think Father Frost must have carried it back. Instead, I sit at the banquet table trying to form some kind of coherent thought. Everything from the past day is a blur except for when I… when I nearly killed Bunny. 

This is all my fault. I drop my head into my hands, the tight collar of my jacket digging into my throat. What the hell is wrong with me?

Across the room from the table, Father Frost is arguing with Tawis. About Anna maybe? Tawis was really angry with Bunny. Anna had looked badly hurt. But Aster wouldn't attack someone for no reason would he? No. Anna was harmless, She'd even been afraid of him... It doesn't make sense. 

A loud snort signals the end of the argument and I glance up. Tawis is frowning, arms crossed stiffly. A light breeze ruffles my hair and Father Frost turns towards me, but I look back down trying to avoid his eyes. It was stupid losing control like that, after all the practicing. What if the Guardians show up angry about Bunny and start a fight? People will get hurt. He'll be so upset. I pull my legs up and cross my arms tightly around my knees. 

Don’t be mad, I think. Don’t be mad. Don’t be mad…

“Jack?” I startle a little when calls my name. Father Frost looms over me, purple coat hanging from his hunched shoulders and dusted with snow. I can see the Snow Queen on the other side of the table too, distant and cold.

“Now that I have finally witnessed your powers surge, I wonder if perhaps your staff has been compromised after all,” he says. What? Father Frost crouches low to meet my eyes. “I know you didn’t want this, Jack. There must be some other magic at work.”

“Other magic… Does that mean you can fix me?” That’s all I want. I was so right to stay away from the kids. They would never have survived what I did to Aster. Father Frost smiles at me, weakly patting my shoulder. I’m having a hard time blinking back the tears. It all feels hopeless.

“I cannot make you any promises yet. I will have to unwind the magic to be sure and the staff may be forever altered as a result,” Father Frost explains, his raspy voice low and tentative. “I know it’s a great deal to ask, Jack.”

“No, it’s not.” I won’t be able to hurt anyone else if I don’t have my crook. “Take it.”

“Thank you for your trust, my boy.” He pulls me into a hug then. I have to bite my cheek stop myself from shaking apart. The pain gives me a focus to cling to. It's a bit awkward though, the way he's squatting, so I slide off the chair and help him to stand. His arm stays solid around my shoulders. “Will you remain here inside while I work? If something or someone is targeting you, they must be powerful indeed. The palace can reflect moonlight and Mother Nature herself would find it hard to breach. You’ll be safe under our care.”

Father Frost holds me as best he can, his age showing in the way he moves. The fabric of his coat is cool and soft, smelling like the coldest of arctic winds, and I gather what nerves I have left while I'm leaning against him. I'm pretty useless right now and it's not like I have anywhere else to go.

“Okay,” I agree against his chest and look over to see the Snow Queen nod grimly. Is she angry with me?

“Is Anna going to be all right?” I ask and pull back a little. Father Frost steadies the both of us by keeping hold of my elbow. 

“She needs to rest. What happened troubles me greatly but discovering the details of their encounter will have to wait until she's recovered. You will both be well so long as you remain in the castle. As for Yuki-Onna?” Father Frost sighs and shakes his head. “I am beginning to doubt her loyalties. It’s possible she’s been helping to undermine you.” 

“How?” I look back and forth between them. All she'd done so far was throw cryptic comments at me. Tawis is lingering back with a resigned expression on his face. He must be worried too.

“Yuki-Onna has been coming and going oddly. Whatever she might be doing, her deceptiveness is worrisome,” the Snow Queen says and I remember how the sprites had been afraid of Yuki-Onna on the parapet. 

“Indeed. Will you check the palace and ensure our security?” The Snow Queen nods at Father Frost’s request and sweeps out of the room. He watches her go for a moment, looking older and more worn down than ever. He shouldn’t do that to himself, not for me. I want to tell him so, but he doesn’t give me the chance. “I need you to rest as well Jack. The sooner I can assess the threat your staff poses, the better. I’ll let you know what I find.”

I get another comforting pat before he departs, leaving Tawis and I behind in the hall. The other man gazes at me for a long moment. He and Father Frost had been arguing. Tawis doesn’t like being ordered around. Does he want me to leave? He hates Bunny though. He probably didn’t care about what I did. Maybe he wanted to go after him? Maybe…

“You look like you could use some warming up,” Tawis crosses the distance between us. “You're shivering.”

I don’t feel cold. Just numb. And empty. Tawis moves closer until he’s less than a foot away, resting one of his hands on my hip while the other drifts up my chest to grasp the collar of my jacket. Then he leans in, forehead against mine. I'm getting more used to physical contact, but it can still feel strange sometimes. Tawis isn’t tall enough to tuck me under his chin like Aster does. I miss him so much. Bunny’s never going to hug me again. I’m trying to squeeze back the tears and shake off the intrusive thoughts when Tawis tilts his head and kisses me gently on the mouth.

I freeze, confused when he slides his hand into my hair. I feel the shivering now, but not in an I’m-cold sort of way. Tawis backs me into the table and presses his lips against mine again insistently. Stop. I put my hands up against his chest. His skin feels like rough-hewn stone and it scrapes my palms. He doesn’t budge when I push. I'm not strong enough. 

The kiss feels like it lasts forever before he pulls back suddenly.

“Fuck, you're a mess, aren't you?” He glares at me. “You used to be fun.”

“W-what?” Tawis gives me a little room, but he doesn't let go. 

“This was a bad idea, even for me. Maybe if I didn't like you so much,” he shakes his head and mutters darkly in a language I don't understand. “Now I have to go find my know-it-all brother.”

“I don’t understand.” Why doesn’t anyone just tell me what’s going on?

“Listen, they’ll know if you leave. Go hide in my room until I get back. It’s probably safest.”

“Tawis-“ he silences me with a harsh kiss that leaves a stinging sensation against my lips.

“You’re going to owe me big, Frost,” he proclaims and then he’s gone. 

I slide down to the floor and hide my face in my hands. What just happened? I feel dizzy and cold and hurt. He kissed me. I didn't want that. Why did he kiss me? Everything is so completely screwed up. What is wrong with me? What am I going to do? I can't go home. Not now. I might of- Aster might- No. I can’t.

I can't do this anymore. Tears drip into my palms and slip through my fingers. Tawis was right. I am a mess. 

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

I try and order my thoughts while I'm shivering like mad on the floor of the tunnel, shards of ice still pricking at my ears.

Jackie didn’t mean it. I have to believe that. Strewth, the look on his face…

The ice clinging to the fur on my head slowly starts to melt. I'm chilled to the bone. Everything aches from the sudden temperature shift. Can't imagine how much worse it’d be if I hadn't had the foresight to dress for once. The frozen stiffness is softening from my long coat and I can feel the damp seeping through the thinner fabric of my trousers. The spring temperature of the tunnel won't be enough though. I can feel my vision closing in. Shattering that ice prison had taken almost everything I’d had. I’m going to pass out...

A loud screech in my ear startles me into awareness. Baby Tooth buzzes around my face in a panic. She must have come looking for me. The fairy darts around, trying to get hold of me, but she hasn’t the strength.

She twitters something loudly and lifts my foot frantically. 

A portal. I need to open the tunnel, somewhere warm. Somehow between the two of us, we get it to work, dumping us out into the arid darkness beneath Punjam Hy Loo. Baby Tooth is gone in a blur. I'm alone and still half ruddy frozen, but I can see the moon high above me, just the slightest sliver in the starry night sky. 

“This would be a good time to start pitching in,” I manage weakly before the weariness overtakes me.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

I don’t know how long it’s been since Tawis left, but I suddenly remember. Anna. I should go see Anna. 

I scrub my face with my sleeve and force myself to my feet. Her room isn’t far from my own. The corridors are dimly lit for some reason and even the stupid snow sprites are staying out of the way, which is a relief. I don't think I could manage the little bastards now. I’m so tired. I make a couple wrong turns before I find the right door and knock, only to have it swing open. Empty. The room looks untouched.

“Jack,” I nearly jump out of my skin when the Snow Queen puts a hand on my shoulder. “Are you all right?”

No. Nothing’s right. Nothing’s ever going to be right. 

“Why do you care? I’m a walking disaster,” I answer her. What does she want? She’s nice and then she’s not and I can’t take all this confusing crap anymore. I want to talk to Anna. “Where’s Anna?”

“Jack,” she guides me to sit on a bench in the hall. Her gown is shifting through shades of glittery blue, folding around her and leaving a trail of frost along the floor. “You’re not a disaster.“

“You don’t understand anything.”

“I do-” she looks like she’s trying to be sympathetic, but it just pisses me off. 

“How the hell would you know? You’re perfect! You’re always in control. You do whatever you want. You’re beautiful and powerful and you have Father Frost and Anna and… and I’m just stupid and useless. I almost killed Bunny! I mess up everything.”

“No,” she shakes her head. “That’s not true. Everyone makes mistakes, Jack. There’s nothing perfect about me.”

“Bullshit! You have everything,” I say, expecting her draw herself up again and turn hard. Instead, the Snow Queen’s face contorts with a sorrow that hurts to watch. 

“I did once. I wish I could explain,” she takes a shaky breath. Then she does straighten, staring at me fiercely. “You have to hold on, Jack. The people who love you are the most important. More than anything. Don’t give up them. Don’t push them away.”

Is that supposed to help? I’m not the one doing the pushing. How can I push them away if they’re already gone? The other Guardians, Bunny especially, have every reason to give up on me after what I’ve done. 

“I hurt him,” my voice breaks on the words. He won’t even know I didn’t mean it. Why would Aster ever want me back?

“If he loves you, in whatever way the two of you have, he'll forgive you,” she insists. I want to believe her, I do. It’s just so hopeless. Nothing makes sense anymore. I'm grateful for how nice she is now though, sympathetic and helpful, like she was when I rambled on to her in the courtyard. This side of the Snow Queen reminds me of my mom, sad but strong. Reaching into my sash, I find the chocolates I stashed there. I hold them out and she blinks in surprise.

“Chocolate?” she asks reverently. “I haven't had chocolate in years.” 

“Bunny dropped them. They’re my favourite kind. He must have brought them for me.” Bunny had made the batch using ingredients he wouldn't normally let me sample. These were “experimental” chocolates and Aster had put them aside as needing more study. I'd stolen some, not knowing what it was, and he'd freaked out. Whatever was in it didn't do anything to me though. It was just really really good. The best ever. I don't deserve it. My tears well up again and I offer them to the Snow Queen, but she shoves my hand back at me.

“Eat them,” she urges me, a chill pricking along my skin. “Now Jack.” She's so forceful that I instinctively obey and pop them into my mouth. The flavour is a shock to my taste buds after having gone so long without eating anything. It warms me from inside, swirling down my limbs and chasing away the ache. 

“Oh,” I gasp. I feel lighter. Less like I’m going to break apart any second. I want to laugh. It's Aster's chocolate, of course it makes me feel better. I lick my lips and turn to thank her but her face has shuttered and the coldness is back. Even her dress has faded into grey instead of blue. Did I do something wrong?

A moment later Father Frost strides around the corner.

“Jack, here you are,” he smiles. “Please, come with me. It’s about your staff.”

“My staff? Did you find out what’s wrong? Can we fix it?” I leap to my feet and Father Frost raises his eyebrows in surprise. 

“I know exactly what your trouble has been. Come,” he frowns at the Snow Queen who smiles blankly back. Finally! I knew he’d be able to help me figure it out. Maybe I’ll get to see the kids in time for Christmas. 

He hurries me away so quickly that I forget to thank the Snow Queen until it's too late. I'll do it later. I’m too excited to worry now, because it’s not just me! Something is wrong with my magic. I bet it was Pitch after all. The doors practically fly by until we’re in part of the palace I’ve never seen.

“Where are we going?” I ask Father Frost as we approach the end of a hallway. There are no doors here. I nearly bump into him when he suddenly stops.

“Hold still for a moment, my boy.” Father Frost grabs me by the collar and puts a hand to my cheek. “Tawis marked you, didn’t he?”

“What? Oh.” I can feel the embarrassed blush on my face. “He kissed me.” Jerk.

“Of course he did,” Father Frost grimaces, a sharp pain radiating from his hand through me. I wrench myself back.

“Ow! That hu-“ I start but a sudden swirl of snow and ice chokes my words. Literally. 

The snow is everywhere. I can't see. I can’t breathe. I've never felt so cold. In my panic, I reach out to where Father Frost had been.

“Hush now, Jack.” His voice carries through the whirlwind as the whiteness swallows me completely. “I've got you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible trigger: briefly trapped against and table and forcibly kissed.


	16. Chapter 16

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

The hell?

This isn't like any afterlife I've ever heard of. Everything is melting, oozing away like overturned paint, and it's dead silent. I reach out and suddenly I’m in The Workshop, only the smell and colour are all wrong. 

This isn’t real.

Don't think I've carked it yet, so it must be a dream. The place looks flat and washed out. All the warmth is gone, along with the ever present noise and madness North usually has hereabouts. The scent of baking Christmas biscuits, gingerbread and the like, are gone too. I peer around but only find shadows and emptiness. No yetis, elves, or arrogant blokes with a penchant for red. I'm alone. The globe is dark and shrouded in ice, its little lights flickering in and out, and isn't that's a bad omen? The floor is back to what it’d been before we’d begun tearing it up to add Jack too. I think this is a manufactured dream. Must be one of Tsar Lunar’s.

About bloody time.

The ceiling is open to the sky and a shaft of moonlight strikes the floor. I watch the pillar rise and an image forms above the crystal just like before. It's Jack, with his hood up and crook in hand. It hangs in the air for a moment before it begins to shift, ropes of frost curling around Jack and lashing his body to the pillar. His hood falls back and reveals the evil grin Jackie's got on his face, dark and malicious when it should be smirking and playful. A worrisome dread begins to build in my chest.

Something’s very wrong with Jack. That’s what this is about. The dream agrees with me and the tension in the air undulates. The silhouettes of the Guardians peel off the floor and latch onto him. Their fingers dig in, holding Jack while he thrashes until the small North plunges a hand into his chest and wrenches out a dark tangle of thread. It pulses ominously and the connection between it and Jack’s staff is clear, black threads winding around the shaft and vanishing into the wood. The crook radiates power and menace. 

It's the staff causing Jack's troubles? And the darkness, is it the same thing that corrupted those blasted sprites? 

The ropes of frost go slack and the image of Jack staggers, righting itself while the other Guardians destroy the tainted crook. Its splintery remains crash to the floor. The darkness tries to escape and the moonlight grows brighter in response, reflecting off the walls and chasing after it. The image of Jack has leaped down to stand only a few strides away. He’s pale and tired. Too tired to notice the darkness rounding back towards him.

It looms upward and attacks him from behind, spikes of blue-black sharpness piercing through Jack's chest. He freezes in a silent scream as the darkness sinks back inside. The moonlight keeps increasing in intensity, but it's a futile effort because Jack arches and splits in two. A dark distorted version of Jack remains standing while the image that looks like my Jackie falls to his knees in obvious agony. 

It's awful. I can't do anything. My hands go right through Jack when I get there and he collapses. I've seen enough corpses to know that he's dead. The twisted image of Jack that remains is all smug satisfaction when the moonlight finally overcomes the scene.

But I don't wake up.

Instead, I'm left in between, a hissing and clicking noise erupting into the silence. Shit. The dream isn't working properly. Is there something else he's trying to tell me? I know something's worked its way inside Jack and that we need to get it out and protect him because it's hellbent on killing him or worse. Dark Jack didn't look like a fearling though. This must something else. Like the sprites.

I reckon the dream's only been able to keep hold of me so long because I'm not fighting it. I wonder if it's waiting for an answer? 

“Someone's hurting Jack or is about too, yeah?” I speak into the light.“One of the winter spirits is doing this.”

The clicking quickens in a sharp rhythm.

“He needs us,” I try again.

More urgent clicking and the bloody racket begins to hurt.

“Jackie needs us now?” It accelerates again, faster and louder and stronger until the noise is frantic and I'm shaking with the force of it. “All right! I understand. STOP!”

And it does. 

“Bunny!” The rush of the dream drops away, taking the urgency with it and plunging me into a vicious chill. That's right. Jackie froze me. There's a heaviness weighing on my chest, but I doubt I could move if I wanted to. Fighting the exhaustion seems impossible. I'm not even shivering. I feel like I've been burned by the cold and my body yearns to sleep. There was something important… something about Jack… 

My arms are suddenly grasped on both sides and I hear yetish muttering mixed in with other chatter. Then a hand takes hold of my chin and shoves something into my mouth.

Chocolate.

The flavour explodes over my tongue and jolts through me. 

“Jack,” I gasp, the dream flooding back. “We need ta find Jack. Now!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who have been commenting - THANK YOU! 
> 
> I love hearing what you think. I may not always respond though, or not right away, because I don't want to say too much. Just wanted to let you know that you're appreciated though!


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have revised this chapter to death. I am letting it go.

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

“Ow.” The impact jolts me awake. The back of my head hurts from where it hit the... table? No. My vision swims, adjusting to the low light. It's an altar made of ice. I can see the blurry reflection in the wall to my left.

“Stay still,” Father Frost orders as bands of thick ice grow from the altar to solidify over top of my body, pinning me in place. What's going on? The last thing I remember is Father Frost telling me that he'd discovered what was wrong with my staff. And then… wait. He'd knocked me out! I try to move but it's too tight. What the hell? 

“Stop! Why are you doing this?” Dammit. I press my palms to the smooth surface. Nothing I do shifts the ice at all. 

Father Frost looks down his nose at me. His purple coat is gone and the sleeves of his shirt are pushed up to show his scarred forearms. He's still hunched over, but he's different somehow, powerful. No one else is here. No one I can see anyway. Above me the ceiling is low and behind him I can't see anything except shadows. I have no idea where we are and I don't see my staff. 

“Why are you so defiant?” He peers down at me, brows pinched together. “You should be consumed by despair.” 

“What?” Father Frost continues to stare. His eyes are so intense that I'm really starting to get worried. What does he want?

“Chocolate!” he exclaims suddenly, making me jerk in surprise. “Left behind by Easter no doubt. You shouldn't have eaten it, Jack. It's only going to make it harder on you.”

What the fuck? Why doesn't anyone explain anything here?

“What are you talking about?” I plead with him. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No, Jack,” Father Frost leans heavily on the altar and sighs, staring into space. “This is my fault.”

“Your-” He places a finger on my lips.

“Let me explain. Three hundred years ago I made a mistake. You see, I'd been watching you for some time, Jack. Young and strong, you were handsome as well. Even your name. It was like a sign pointing me to you.” 

He'd watched me? All this time? He'd never said anything about that before. Had Father Frost always been trying to watch over me, one more thing Manny'd kept from me?

“So I watched and I waited. I expected that you would check the ice first thing in that morning that day. It was your routine before chores, when you planned to skate later on. Only you didn’t check that particular day, when all my plans had been readied. I waited all morning before I stopped expecting you. I thought I'd have to try again. I should have been aware when you arrived with your overeager sister, but I was careless. I hadn't even solidified the ice as a precaution. You understand what happened next, don't you?”

The more he talks the more I get it. He wasn't just watching at all.

“I went through the ice. You- it's your fault that I…?” I ask, desperately hoping that this is some horrible misunderstanding. He wouldn't do that to me. He'd wanted to meet me. He'd said so. It was the Man in the Moon that had kept us apart.

“Yes, my boy,” he confirms. “I killed you, but not in the way I'd intended.” Killed me. Not caused an accident, but killed me. The casual way he confesses makes me feel like I've been hit with a sledge hammer. Why? Father Frost had weakened the ice on purpose? He'd almost killed Bekah. I died. The warmth and hope that Aster's chocolate had kindled in me is smothered by a mess of hurt and panic. The bands are too tight and it's hard to breathe. I'm trapped. Trying to twist doesn't help, it only makes the painful bruising on the back of my head worse. No. Stop it. Calm down. I suck air in gasps and eventually my heart stops trying to break through my ribcage.

“That's right, deep breaths,” he pats me, snow drifting down from his hair to land on my cheek. “I am sorry. It was my mistake. It should have gone much more smoothly.”

I try and get a hold of myself. I can't do anything except listen to him and hope for a chance to get free. 

“If you had been alone back then you’d have gone through the ice and panicked, given yourself over to me in a desperate attempt not to die. Instead, you focused your entire self on saving your sister. A sacrifice of love,” Father Frost shakes his head again. Bekah. The Snow Queen had said the same thing. “It was unfortunately noble. When you went under I could barely hold onto you.”

“Hold me?” That doesn't make sense. “But you were trying to kill me...” 

“Well,” his lips twist into something that's supposed to be a smile but fuck if it isn't creepy, “in a way. I meant for you to become a spirit.”

“You shifted me?” He nods. “But why? How?”

“You can thank the Man in the Moon for that actually. Your life force lingered until moonrise and a moonbeam came our way. They're meddlesome things, always bouncing around and poking themselves into the business of others, but moonbeams, for all their magic, are still mostly light. Light that can be reflected, refracted, and ultimately split.”

Moonbeams. From the Man in the Moon? Aster had said that he knew someone who could talk to them, but moonbeams aren't alive...

“I sent a dazed reflection bouncing off shards of ice and back to its master while I used the magic of the other half to make you the spirit that you are. Sadly, I was weakened and could only watch as you rose from the ice though I was able to give you your name at least. So you see, calling me Father Frost is rather fitting after all.”

Father Frost. He made me into Jack Frost? And there’s a moonbeam inside me. Moonlight. Is that why? I was so afraid when I first woke up, under the ice, but then I saw the moon and everything felt right. 

“The Man in the Moon-” 

“He didn’t notice, thankfully. Too focused on fear and nightmares,” he says. Manny didn't know. He wasn't ignoring me. He didn't have anything to do with it at all. 

“Why? Why did you it?” I ask. It was wrong. No one had asked me. Even the Guardians thought it wasn't right, what happened. Why would anyone do that? It's not fair.

“Why did I force your shift? Because I needed you, my boy.” 

“You needed me? You selfish asshole! I left my mother and sister alone! They're the ones that needed me. I swear, when I get out of this-” God, Aster was right. I never should have trusted him. I try fighting the ice again, but it's still no use. “Fuck!”

“Oh, Jack. I am a little fond of you, but I still need what you have. You see, your power is really my own and I need it back. Once we reach solstice, I’ll take the rest from you as well.”

“The rest?” What else do I have? He's already taken my life, ruined my friendships, and now he has my staff.

“The rest of you, my boy. You needn't worry. I'm happy to explain. It's important for you to understand.” Goddamn him, it's like he's trying to be nice about it. He's going to kill me again, isn't he? I have to talk him out of it. Or stall, or something. 

“Look, you can't take anything. No one else can use my staff. If you want my help, you need to let me go, okay?” Please listen to me.

“That's only partly true, Jack. The staff has been infused with my power. I'd settled the bulk of my strength in it during the ritual, as a precautionary measure. When you claimed the staff you gained control of it, and you were so energetic and youthful when you rose that I couldn't begin to keep up. I needed to wear your spirit down, keep the Man in the Moon from discovering you, and find myself another source of power. Fortunately, I still had allies. A few centuries keeping you isolated were steadily doing the job and kept you from finding any nosy friends that might interfere. It allowed me to strengthen and discover the solution to my first predicament – how to reabsorb my power back from the staff.” 

“You! I was alone for centuries. You kept everyone away!”

“Yes,” he sounds almost sorry about it. “If everything had gone properly you'd never have known what happened, never have felt anything. I didn't intend to be cruel Jack, but it was necessary in the end. Winter is like that. In retrospect, I should have handled it differently, but I was too preoccupied by the loss of power. If I'd gone to you then as Father Frost, things would have been quite different between us.”

“I hate you,” the words sob out of me. I'm such an idiot. All of this, everything, all because he wants his power back. He never gave a shit about me at all, did he?

“At least it's over now. The Boogeyman unintentionally did me a favour by breaking the staff. When you forged it back together it finally gave me an imperfection to work on. I was able to influence you then, bring you closer to me and farther from them. Soon, you won't have to suffer at all.”

“You're a monster. My family. My friends - you made my powers go out of control on purpose! You broke Jamie's window. Claude and Caleb,” I gasp, “you tried to kill them too.”

“Killing them wasn't required, their loss of belief made a much more powerful impression. The sprites did well enough there. The window though, yes, that was me. I very nearly had the Easter Bunny as well. And they aren't your powers,” the elder spirit flashes me an ugly grimace. “Soon I'll free them from their bindings and they'll return to me.”

Bunny. It hadn't been me. Not that he'll know that. He probably hates me. Had Father Frost been messing with my feelings too? Is that why everything kept going wrong with Aster? He'd flat out told me Bunny couldn't really love me… I hope Aster's all right. I shouldn't have let Father Frost stop me from checking on him. 

“I won't let you hurt anyone else. The Guardians won't either. When they find out-”

“They won't. Even your beloved Bunny has been chased off, though it took much more than I'd anticipated, even with you spurning him at every turn.” 

“I won't give you anything!”

“I'm not sure I've been entirely clear, Jack, and I do want you to understand. Three hundred years ago, I wasn't creating a companion. I was making a new avatar for myself. You're well aware of how aged my current aspect is. I miss my youth. Simply altering myself isn't so easily done, but merging with another spirit? It's not uncommon. Unfortunately, there was no one that suited me. So I shifted you. It took some doing, with some rather dark magic, but using the myth of Jokul Frosti and a little added lore of my own I managed it, building a young and vital myth.” Father Frost trails a hand up my chest and fixes my collar. It's possessive and creepy. I want to squirm away but I'm trapped. 

“No..” His hands stop and cup my face, forcing me to look into his eyes. 

“You’re my creation, Jack. I chose you. I named you. I made you everything that you are. You're nearly perfect. A strong new form to wear, waiting for me to claim you. You aren’t truly a person, my boy.” He leans in close. “You don't even have a soul.”

“You're lying,” I struggle but he holds my jaw fast. “I remember. The tooth box opened for me. I’m Jackson Overland.”

“Jackson Overland is dead,” he insists, pinching my chin harshly. “You are Jack Frost, a mere echo of the boy who died in that lake. I never meant for this to go on so long or for you to develop your own myth and believers. If only you hadn’t gotten involved with the Guardians. I'll have to unwind the magic of that oath. And taking up with a spring spirit? I hadn't expected that either. The wretched rabbit refuses to even let a Wind into his domain.”

“The Wind?” My stomach sinks. That too? The Wind has always been with me. Maybe not always completely reliable, but still mine. 

“My boy, I told you where I began. I am and I was Boreas – the North Wind. The Wind you call is just one of several pieces of myself put to use. Thankfully, you were too over eager to think much on it. I think you better sleep, Jack. I promise, I'll end it as quickly as I can.”

“No-”

“Sleep.” I struggle against the command, but something forces me down, sucking the energy from me. I'm tired. So tired. 

“I won't...”

“Hush.”

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

“We have to find him,” I say, yet again. Pacing in the globe room, I can't shake the urgency narrowing my thoughts, even though the finished floor is complete with Jack's symbols and should be reassuringly different the dream. North watches me, while Sandy drifts by looking pensive. Baby Tooth and Toothiana hover by the globe, speaking quickly back and forth and making some kind of plans. Good.

“Bunny, this dream of yours sounds different from what I-”

“Because the bloody machine was broken!” I knock into a chair and send it tilting over, elves skittering out of the way. “He's obviously had to cobble the damned thing together from whatever bits could be spared from elsewhere.”

“And you are certain it was from Manny?” North asks. A grumbling yeti rights the chair and steps back from me when I pass. They've finally given up on getting me back to bed. 

“Yes!” I'm not an idiot. I know the difference. Pooka don't dream like humans do anyway and far less frequently. North nods and begins cranking open the ceiling. Sandy drifts closer and raises an eyebrow at me.

What?

He looks me up and down.

Oh. Well, it's not that bad.

I'd been lucky that North was aware of my chocolate experiments of late. He'd force fed me the chocolate in my gear over the objections of the yeti, having a lot more experience with my transformations than they did. Thankfully he'd found a piece of from the batch I'd been bringing Jack and not the packet tucked away for real emergencies. I was only a little taller and broader, because it mostly increased my energy levels and metabolism. That had burned away the chill right quick, used up a good chunk of the transformative magic, and left me running a touch hot. I'd brought it for Jackie, as a peace offering since he liked it so much, but Marzanna and Winter had warped everything. 

I'm going to kill every last one of them if they've hurt him.

“The moon is not out yet,” North says. 

“Fer fuck's sa-” I stride over to him. North stands firm with his arms crossed.

“Even if we find Jack, if he attacked you-” 

“He didn't mean that!” I growl down at him. Since when has North been reluctant to jump into a fight? “Ya should've see him. He was horrified.”

“I'm sure he was,” Tooth flits over, laying a gentle hand on my shoulder before I brush it away, “but if he's that out of control we need to be prepared. We might make things worse.” Sandy nods seriously. 

“The winter spirits will not welcome us Bunny.” North shakes a finger at me, like I'm not bloody well aware of how much winter types dislike everyone else, especially us. It doesn't matter. Jackie needs us. “You are sure he will want to see us? You said he wished to stay there until-” 

“Like we're giving him a fucking choice! Tsar Lunar finally gets a dream down and this is it, so I'm not taking any chances on whether it's bloody metaphorical! Are ya coming or do ya need a corpse before ya stop worrying about offending Winter?” 

Sandy gets right up in my face after that, sternly disapproving. A few symbols only he and I can really interpret fly by and I realize just how wound up I've gotten. Shit. Feelings are bad enough without chocolate mucking about with things. 

“Sorry,” I grumble. He nods and backs off. I try to breath deeply, letting my anger shift gears into frustration and worry. Anything could be happening to Jack now and we'd never know. Baby Tooth, fearless as ever, zips up to perch on my shoulder and snuggles into my neck. “We have to find him. Now. Not after Solstice- Bloody buggering fuck!”

“Solstice,” North's eyes go wide. 

“Ya see? It's not just me, ya bastard!” Yeah, I'm less than purely rational at the moment, but that doesn't mean I'm not right. 

“What? What about Solstice?” Toothiana asks, eyes darting back and forth between me and North.

“The Winter Solstice is tomorrow,” North's words are low and fierce. “Is a good time for spell work, seeding or creating new things. With the moon so thin this year, someone could make use of the chance to work black magic. In the dream, a dark twin was born from Jack and if this same sorcerer has been working on the winter sprites...” North snaps straight. “Bunny is right! We must find Jack!”

“Finally!” Strewth. It's been Jack they wanted all along. Someone's been driving a wedge between Jackie and his friends on purpose, isolating him and reducing his believers to make him more vulnerable. And it's all leading up to the Winter Solstice...

“Right,” Toothiana and Baby Tooth nod in unison. “Baby Tooth is going back to coordinate fairies from the palace. A few will stay with me. What do you need us to do?” They've certainly got themselves coordinated despite the split, though I'm surprised Baby Tooth is content to stay back. It's probably for the best. Toothiana is still the strongest by far.

“We're going after Jack.” 

Sandy shoots a question mark into the air.

“Yes, how are we going to find him?” North adds. “The palace you mentioned-”

“I can't find it myself, but Tawiskaron was there.” Sandy's eyebrows shoot up and he forms an image of Flint in one of his more literally stony aspects. “Yeah him. The chaotic little ratbag was there with the rest. If he's out and about and causing trouble his brother will want to know, and there's nowhere on Earth that Flint can hide from Sapling.”

“Who?” Tooth asks. I resist the urge to scowl. Now I'll have to waste time explaining. She's even less familiar than Sandy with others, being so busy and generally apart from most elemental or mythological spirits. The Tooth Fairy myth isn't as widespread as her world wide work with teeth, not that it slows her down any. 

“They were Iroquois spirits originally, but they've changed over the years like everyone else. We need to find Sky Holder - Teharonghyawago or Tharuhyawa:ku or Okwiraseh or whatever the hell he's going by these days.” We haven't talked in ages. He used to keep Flint on a short leash. I cross to the globe and point a bit east of the Great Lakes to Tooth. “We can start around there.” 

“If you can find Jack and bring him home, I have a plan for Christmas,” North offers. 

“We don't have time for Christmas gifts,” I snap. The idea of those clothes on Jackie now is even more distressing. They could have anything woven into them.

“Yes, yes. I know,” North waves his hands, “but this gift will help with his believers and if you are right Jack will need all the strength he can get.”

“We'll talk about it when we get back.” Jackie'll be all right. We just need to get to him. “Where's my ruddy coat?”

A yeti thrusts an armful of green and brown at me and retreats. The coat barely fits my shoulders. Sure as hell can't button it up. I don't bother trying the pants. It'll have to do, though given the energy I've burned off healing, it won't be long before I'm back to my usual self anyway. 

“Take this,” North hands me a snow globe in a drawstring sack. “If you find someone who knows where this palace is, have them hold the globe and concentrate. The globe will make the connection and open portal.”

“Thanks, mate,” I say, even though I know full well how the globes work. I nod at him but North won't leave it at that and insists on throwing an arm around me. 

“Keep me on the loop, yes?” He looks anxious now. It's not much consolation. North can't come with us, not unless it turns worse. After the past year, Christmas needs to go off properly.

Sandy whips up one of his preferred modes of transport, a dreamsand biplane, and it’s not until I’ve already leapt into the thing that I register we’re flying. Sandy smiles at me knowingly.

“Shut it and head south,” I slump down. Least he's given me some extra room.

The plane zooms up into the sky, Toothiana and her flock of fairies keeping pace admirably. 

“You find Emily Jane?” I call to Sandy once we're well underway. He has no difficulty using his imagery to explain, even while we're soaring above the clouds.

Apparently he did find her and, while she was happy enough to see him, she wasn't willing to get involved in anything she considered to be Manny's mess. She knew about Jack and had avoided him as she did most everyone else. She had her own cares and concerns, preferring to leave the things connected to her old life behind as much as possible. Bad memories. 

Can't say as I blame her.

Mother Nature did ask after Katherine, but Sandy'd had nothing to offer there. Katherine and Nightlight had vanished a few decades after the Guardians had formed. Ombric had been shifting to Father Time by then and, well, he'd never had a proper answer to give us about where they'd gone, only a small reassurance that he'd seen them in the future. It'd never felt right, but he avoided the topic on the rare occasions we even saw him. 

Sandy shrugs apologetically. Whatever's going on, Emily Jane hasn't been anywhere near it. Fine. We'll find Jackie and drag him to the Williams then, see if they can shed some light on this. If he can send dreams now, even shoddy ones, Tsar Lunar might be able to communicate with them too.

It's not long before Sandy drops down beneath the clouds and Lake Ontario comes into view. Toothiana flies closer and Sandy shows her his intended path with arrows. As we descend though, a pair of golden eagles soar up to draw level with us. Sandy blinks at me.

“He expecting us,” which doesn't make me feel any better at all. Sandy and Tooth follow the eagles when they change course. Sapling must know that his brother's up to no good. I'm starting to worry that we've got even less time than I thought.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Pain. He has my staff and whatever he’s doing… Everything goes red or black, and I can’t concentrate. He’s tearing me apart. Like the dream. The dream Father Frost had told me not to worry about. The Man in Moon had been trying to talk to me and now I'm not sure what he was trying to say. The pain surges again and I cry out. 

“Quiet!” Anna hisses next to me. Oh no.

“Run, Anna.” It hurts to talk. Screaming has worn my throat raw. “Go find the Guardians. Father Frost-”

“Awww, you do care,” Anna laughs and ruffles my hair as another shock of pain makes me convulse. “Is it working?

“Yes. He’s feeling the shredding of his connection with Winter. A necessary element I'm afraid.”

“Anna-” I call to her again. She ignores me. She's not even looking at me when the pain fades, but Father Frost is standing next to her.

“You said that I could have Spring,” Anna presses into Father Frost. 

“He'll show up eventually. Too late for Jack, but soon enough for you my dear Marzanna.” He leans down and they kiss. Oh. 

She was a lie too.

“Good,” she turns back to me, her expression gleefully cruel. “I’m looking forward to seeing your bunny again when I have the time to play properly. Maybe I’ll skin him and make myself a hat?” 

I'm still reeling from Anna's betrayal when I realize. Aster was injured because of me, because of how Fa- Old Man Winter used me, and now he was vulnerable. He has to be okay. The other Guardians would have helped him, right? I have to believe that. 

“You... couldn't do it... before,” I manage to get out. Marzanna laughs in my face again. Old Man Winter moves out of sight. I wish I could see my staff.

“That was all for show. Poor little Anna and the big bad Bunny. Don’t you know what I am? Marzanna, Morena, whatever name you use I’m not a pretty little ice princess. I’m a winter spirit and a death spirit and even have a little experience making nightmares of my own,” she boasts, tapping my forehead with her finger.

Nightmares. The nightmare I had about the Guardians, was that her? Anna was my best friend. I'd told her things, and Father Frost too… God. Is everyone here against me? 

Another wave of pain derails my thoughts and when I come back to myself Marzanna is peering down at me intently, her braids swinging forward to frame her face.

“Where did you imprison the Nightmare King, anyway?” she asks curiously. Cold and Dark. Pitch's words rattle around in my head. The possibility of them joining forces is terrifying.

“Fuck you,” I grind out through the pain, but she only laughs.

“Oh Jack. I fully intend to enjoy this body, just not with you in it.” She meets my eyes with a twisted kind of sympathy. “Nobody actually wants you, you know. Why do you think it was so easy to keep you isolated for centuries? And the other Guardians? If they knew what you were, you’d have been banished from their little club without a second thought.”

They wouldn't. Except… I am tainted. If Fath- Old Man Winter can control me, twisting my emotions and affecting my powers? They can't trust me. No one can.

God, everything hurts. The agony of whatever the hell he's doing is overwhelming. I can't help the tears that run down my temples. Can't even turn my head. I can't stop him.

“Not that you’ll ever really know I suppose,” Marzanna buttons up my collar and smoothes out the fabric, “not after you merge and Winter claims your form.” She continues, unfolding my pants, cleaning off my feet, and producing the socks and shoes I'd stowed under my bed. She's waved away the ice that held me down, but it doesn't matter, because I can't move.

“There. Much more presentable,” she says. “I wonder how long it will take them to notice?”

They won’t know it isn't me. He could do anything. Aster...

“I'll finally get to meet your believers,” she adds eagerly. Oh God. The kids. “If the sprites haven't been too overzealous with them.” 

I try to speak but my voice is gone. 

“We’re going to have so much fun!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So - lots of exposition but necessary stuff. Hope it makes sense so far...


	18. Chapter 18

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Everything is a blur. Everything hurts. The pain never stops, but sometimes… sometimes I get just enough of a lull to think. 

I should have told the Guardians. Should have explained the dream. I’m so stupid! The Guardians... the kids. Fucking sprites. Claude and Caleb's accident… all my fault.

What is he doing? Where are they? My staff… not mine. Nothing's mine. 

I should have trusted Aster. I messed it up again. Anna wants to kill Bunny... 

Wait. They tried. He got away. He-

The pain flares suddenly and I scream, but nothing comes out. An angry red blackness presses down on me. Heavy. Hurting. 

Dark.

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

The eagles guide the plane lower towards a clearing dusted with snow and ringed by trees. I'm half ready to leap out of the damn thing. My imagination's been all too happy to fill my thoughts with horrific possibilities. I'd seen too many people infected with darkness in my lifetime. If it takes Jack too...

The biplane disintegrates and we finish descending to the ground in a shower of golden sand. Not sure which side of the border we're on. It's cold and quiet. Tooth hovers behind me with her entourage, all hanging in the air silently. I'd forgotten how quiet they could be when they wanted.

Standing near the tree line is a tall man with dark hair. Time was Sapling would've been clad almost entirely in deerskin and sporting a mohawk, but change touches everyone. Some cling to the past and tradition as much as they can, others find their own way forward. Apparently, Flint leaned more traditional, as Sapling was wearing jeans and a leather jacket with his black hair cropped short. His power though, it's like a sleeping giant. I suspect more than a few smaller spirits have given themselves over to becoming one with Sapling, Sky Holder. 

“Bunnymund,” he hails me solemnly. He looks tired. Can't say it's unexpected. He's always been keen on watching over his people and to say their history has been rough? They've faced near genocide. It's a common ground we've gone over before. 

I actually get along with most local spirits. Most of them knew about me long before the Guardians, by rumour if nothing else, but I got to know them better after my shift. Once I was out and about again a lot of them were more comfortable coming to me with their questions than dealing with any of the others. Being a giant rabbit associated with growth and fertility worked in my favour there. Ran a lot of interference on behalf of the tooth fairies and Sandy that I don't think I ever bothered explaining to them. Now that I know how long he was around, it's odd that no one ever mentioned Jack to me.

Questions for another time. Right now, we need to focus on finding him. 

“She:kon,” I greet him. Sapling nods and glances at Sandy and Tooth.

“English will be fine, old friend. We haven't the time for confusion.” Well shit. Sapling gestures at the trees and Flint shuffles forward, clearly bound from fleeing. “My brother has returned with a warning about your friend.”

“What happened?” I demand. Flint scowls at me, but it's Sapling that answers.

“Old Man Winter has been warping the aspects of Winter to his own ends.”

“He wants Jack,” Flint interjects. “I don't know what the hell he's doing exactly, but the old man has bitched at me enough to know that it's probably going to kill Jack by the time he's done.”

“And you were helping him?”

“I tried to warn Jack. It's not like I had a choice.” Sapling looks sharply at Flint. “Fine. I fucked up all right?”

“My brother made some poor choices and Old Man Winter held the consequences over him,” Sapling clarifies. “He has returned to face his mistakes in order to help Jack.”

“You turned yourself in for Jack?” Tooth voices our mutual surprise. I suppose if you'd asked me before all this, I'd have said Flint wasn't all bad, being his brother's other half in spiritual terms. He's still trouble. And sacrificing his freedom for someone else? It set my nerves on edge trying to figure out why.

“I didn't expect to actually like him. The old man and Marzanna, the way they explained it, they made Jack sound like a minor spirit. Like a hollow ghost. But he isn't. He's fun,” and Flint sends me wicked smirk when he continues, “pretty too. He tastes like snow and wind, and the sounds he makes-”

My instincts send me forward with the sudden urge to belt the grin off his face, but Sandy's too far ahead of me, his dreamsand lightly twined around my waist. Flint laughs.

I glare, but Sandy shakes his head. Right. We need him. He's the only one we've got who knows where the ruddy court's hidden away. The asshole is probably just spinning tales to get to me anyway. 

“Where is he?” I grind out, shaking off the dreamsand. I can bloody well control myself. Sandy retrieves the snow globe from its bag and passes it to Flint, who cups it in his hands despite being bound at the wrists.

“What am I supposed to do with this?” he asks. Flint tilts the globe this way and that as it shimmers with magical energy.

“Think about the last place you saw Jack,” Tooth flits forward between us. “The globe will lock onto that and we can open a portal there.”

“Interesting.” The image in the globe begins to change when Flint narrows his gaze. A tall icy palace forms, glittering brightly with reflected light and looming over an empty icy plain. “I hope you find him. When you do, tell him Tawis wants him to visit. He deserves better than them. Better than you for that matter.”

“Flint-” Sapling cautions. Tooth snatches the globe away and Sandy floats between us with an alarmed expression on his face. 

“What the hell d'ya mean by that?” Flint faces me belligerently, even with his hands tied. We've never been friends.

“I think you know. Look at you. Do you really think he would ever-” Sandy knocks him out before he finishes his too true barbs. Fuck. The idea of him and Jack... Sapling lets his brother crumple to the ground while I'm trying to rein in my emotions. It's not as bad as at the Workshop, but I'm still too easy to rile up. 

“My apologies, Bunnymund. My brother is… well. He is my brother. I should have kept closer track of him, but it's been so long since he's stirred up any real trouble.” He's regretful, but I understand. Family is family. So long as Flint's kept locked away for another few decades or so for bad behaviour, I can live with it.

“Thank you so much for your help, but we really have to go,” Tooth says while Sandy yanks hard on my arm. I snap out of it when the globe smashes against a tree trunk and the portal whirls open in a riot of colour.

Sandy shoves me forward and we land on a wide expanse of snow covered tundra. This better be the right place. I'd give just about anything to have Jackie tell me off for interfering again if it meant he was all right, but if Flint was worried enough to do what he did? 

“Listen, watch out for Old Man Winter and Marzanna. Jackie said the Snow Queen and a Yuki-Onna were hereabouts too. I don't know where they stand on this.” Should've kept my damned temper and asked Flint. 

The palace isn't far, marring the natural landscape with its extravagance. I can see giant figures of ice standing on guard around it, but there's something else. My ears twitch.

“Quiet.”

A shushing whispering sound spreads out from the palace and I hear Toothiana gasp. It’s disintegrating. We watch in silence as the edifice fractures in an eerily graceful way. The monstrous guards that blocked the entrance start coming apart too, breaking into icy shards and flakes, falling upwards until they vanish into the sky. Left at the centre is a trembling woman in a blue gown.

The Snow Queen. The one who made that ruddy outfit, shoes and all.

There’s no disguising the crunch of my footsteps on the snow, so I wait, letting Sandy float over. Toothiana isn't far behind. It's the warm golden glow that gives them away first.

“Oh!” the Queen gasps, recoiling and throwing up a hand defensively.

“It's all right,” Tooth says, Sandy nodding along. “We're not going to hurt you. We just want to find Jack.”

The Snow Queen's eyes go wide and then she spots me just behind them. I wonder for a moment if she's going to fight, but instead her expression collapses in on itself and she sobs.

“I’m sorry. I tried to help him,” she says, a small flurry of snowflakes forming out of the cold air around her. Toothiana kneels with her.

“You mean Jack? Can you tell us where to find him?” As Tooth tries to gently question her, Sandy shoots me an alarmed look and tilts his head towards the castle. It's completely gone, the ground scraped clean, as if nothing had ever been there to begin with. If Jack was ever here, he isn't now. 

I can sense the anger and panic rising in my throat. Fucking winter. What have they done with him?

“It's my fault. Father Frost couldn’t have done it without my power.” The teary confession makes no sense.

“What d'ya mean your power? Ya helped him?” The question comes out harsher than I'd intended. What the hell had she been thinking? But Sandy is shaking his head violently at me. Old Man Winter had coerced Flint, hadn't he? He'd done something to the Queen then too. “Explain.”

“He just takes and takes… separating you from the people who care, making promises...” her voices catches and she sucks in a shaky breath while Tooth holds her hands. “It doesn't matter. I don't know where he took him. I tried. I made him eat the chocolate.”

It isn't any kind of answer, but she's right. It doesn't matter. Not while Jack is missing. 

Sandy frowns and flips through some very disturbing images. Dark magic. Warping the season...

“Is Jack bound to Old Man Winter?” I ask, horrified that it might have got that far. That's strong magic, especially if Jack was convinced to accept it willingly. 

“It’s worse. You have to stop them. You have to find him before Father kills him,” she pleads like I need to be convinced.

“Where?"

“I don't know,” she deflates. The colour is slowly starting to come back into her face. “He never told me the details. Only Marzanna.”

“The dark sprites, that was him too?” I ask and the Snow Queen goes rigid alarm.

“They were after the children. If he's let go of me, the sprites might be left to run wild too.” Toothiana jerks into the air from where she'd been comforting the Snow Queen. 

“We'll go. Aster-” she turns to ask but I've opened the tunnel already. Tooth knows where the Burgess door is. “We''ll make sure they're all right.”

She's gone in an instant. Fuck. How are we going to find Jack now? 

Sandy starts whipping his dreamsand through images rapid fire, grim determination on his face. He's going back to Emily Jane. If this is a seasonal thing, her magic might be able to help.

“Thought you said she didn't want to get involved?” Sandy waggles his finger and points at his chest. Well. She'd better bloody well listen. Sandy is pissed. He disappears off to wherever he's expecting to find Mother Nature while I'm stuck waiting, trying to figure out what to do next. 

“All right. You,” I point at the Snow Queen. “You are going ta tell me everything, d'ya understand?”

“Yes. Yes, of course.” The Snow Queen struggles to her feet and is looking more stable by the second. She must have been under Old Man Winter's control for some time. 

So I cross my arms and listen. Dread congeals in my chest as she explains the old man's machinations, because as I learn more about his plans, I can only think of one reason he'd have let the bond he'd made between himself and Queen break.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

I’m floating in my lake. Peaceful and alone. The full moon is shining down on me through the water. My hands tingle and sparkle like they’re lit up from within. Moonlight! Is this a memory or a dream? Maybe-

“Oh no you don’t!” The words cut through and a hand strikes me hard across the face. “No dreaming.” 

Father Frost- No. Old Man Winter is standing with my staff in his hands now. I can see the blurry outline of him off to my right. The pain I’ve been feeling is a dull ache. I’m not sure why he stopped, but I’m glad for the rest.

“Focus now Jack.” I try and look him in the face, but Marzanna forces my head into position so that I'm looking straight at my crook. 

“Don't fight it,” she says. The staff is glowing electric blue. “You're only going to make it worse.”

In one swift movement, Old Man Winter wrenches my crook and shatters it, blue-black light erupting from the pieces with a violent wind. It's nothing like what Pitch did. The roaring pain deafens my hearing and overloads my nerves, so intense that all I can feel is the single point of agony in my chest where it's tearing me apart. 

Oh God. Please. 

I don't want to die.


	19. Chapter 19

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Something is sparking and snapping and shredding inside me. It pulls me up, like a puppet, until I’m abruptly dropped back onto the icy altar. 

It takes a few seconds before I can force myself to breathe. 

Not dead. Not yet.

The intense pain is gone but everything still hurts. I feel heavy, limp, wrung out. Opening my eyes is a massive effort, tears escaping to run down into my hair. I think it's snowing. 

I want to sleep. 

I want to let go. 

I...

“You did it!” Marzanna’s cry echoes in the room.

“Yes,” the raspy voice of Old Man Winter thrums with power. “I did.”

I can’t. I can't let them do this. 

I have to move. 

Tears of pain and frustration keep flowing down my cheeks, making it hard to see, but I manage to turn my head. Come on. Move. While they're distracted. 

Move.

I roll off the ice altar and land on the rough ground. A splinter from my staff digs into my neck. I’m going to pass out again. 

Please. Please work. 

“Jack-” I distantly hear my name. 

I want to go home.

“No!”

The room spins and I feel faint. 

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

I feel it when the portal opens.

Jack.

I'm through, running pell mell down the tunnel in an instant. When I'd left the Snow Queen, she'd been saying something about General Winter but fuck if I know what it was. She was tougher than she looked, that one. Even after two centuries, she'd held on to herself in spite Old Man Winter's enslavement. I know Jackie's got some steel to him too, but now that I know what their plans are...

Just who was I going to find in my Warren?

A body is lying just inside the tunnel mouth, unmoving. Not unlike I was hours earlier. Aww no. 

“Jack?” I approach cautiously. “Jackie, it's me.”

I carefully place a hand on his chest. Still breathing. He's wearing that bloody outfit, with the shoes even. Hell with it. I'm not giving up on him yet. If Jackie made it here like this, it has to be him.

“I've got ya,” I scoop Jack up against my chest and carry him out into the Warren proper. It's hardly an effort even though I'm back down to my usual size now. Jack makes a rather strangled sound and curls up, shivering violently. Shivering. Strewth. I set him down on the grass and dig through my things. There's a draught I'd made up some years ago for North in here somewhere. When Nick'd nearly gone down that one Christmas he never liked talking about, I'd decided that he needed something for holiday related emergencies. Something with a little more heft to it than yeti remedies. Might not be exactly the same for Jack, but I hope it'll help. 

I pour half the usual dose down his throat, and he swallows it instinctively. When it hits him, Jack flails wildly, gasping and shoving at my arm.

“No! No, I won't- ” His voice is rough and he struggles until he gets a fistful of fur and freezes. “B-Bunny?”

His eyes are the same bright blue, but he looks so exhausted. Jackie'd been gone for hours according to the Snow Queen. They could've done anything to him. He'd managed to escape though. I'm so ruddy proud I could burst.

I pull him upright so he can sit, but keep him in the circle of my arms, his shoulder against my chest and his face tipped up. There's a painful hope in his face, as though he can't quite believe he's here.

“Yeah, Snowflake. It's me.” 

“You're okay? Oh God. Oh my God. I’m sorry. I-”

“I'm fine. Are ya all right? Did he hurt ya?” My hands run over him, gently pressing and checking. He shivers and recoils a little. What the fuck did they do? 

I cram down the rage that threatens to erupt and drop my hands to my sides. I'll find time to deal with the old man later, when Jack isn't a trembling mess. Wish I could pull him closer again, if only to share some warmth.

“Yes. No. I don’t know.” He brings his sleeve up to wipe at the escaping tears and stills, looking at the fabric of his jacket in horror before scrambling back and ripping the damn thing down the front. “Stupid, stupid, stupid!”

“Jack, stop,” I reach out.

“No!” He wrestles with the fabric until he's gotten the jacket and shirt off, buttons flying everywhere. The rest follows, shoes and socks and everything until he's sitting naked in the grass, shivering. 

“I'm such an idiot,” he sobs, head in his hands. 

I shrug off my coat and Jack almost jumps out of his skin when I drop it across his shoulders. It's big enough on him that the edges drape down and pool in his lap. If I can't hug him, I can at least give him this. 

“Better?” He nods and fumbles around until he gets his arms through the sleeves. Wearing my coat, he looks… well. That's nothing I should be thinking about right now, is it?

He brings a shaky hand up to rub at his chest, like there's an ache there, but I can't see any bruises.

“Aster, you can't trust me.” 

“What?” I ask, crouching next to him.

“You can't!” Jack shakes his head violently, voice more hoarse and raw as his volume increases. “Fathe- Old Man Winter, he did something to me. He made me hurt people.”

“I know.” Curse the old man for using Jack's need for family against him. The Snow Queen had described that in such a pained manner that I knew he must have done something similar to her as well.

“What? How?” The mix of surprise and dismay on his face is awful.

“When we went looking for you, we found the Snow Queen. She tried to help. Explained everything. Manny sent us a warning that you were in danger too.” That startles him.

“You were looking for me? Wait, the Man in the Moon talked to you?” 

“He sent me a dream.” Though it felt more like a nightmare. “A warning.” 

“Was it in the Workshop? With the pillar?” I nod. “He sent that to me too, but I thought-”

“What did you think, Jackie?” I ask, but I'm half certain that I already know. I know exactly how he would have seen it. Would've thought the worst about himself.

“I thought it meant he didn't want me to be a Guardian,” he whispers. He'd thought Manny was judging him.

“Did you see the whole thing or just the part where the rest of us went after you?”

“There was more?” Jack blinks at me. 

“Yeah,” but maybe now isn't the best time. “Look, it doesn't matter. You're safe now.”

“I'm not! That's what I was trying to tell you. Old Man Winter, he's the one that made me. Killed me. He told me everything, Aster. He picked me and weakened the ice and fucked it up. He wanted to come after me, but he messed up his magic by sinking it into my crook.” 

“He's got your staff then?” How far had it gotten before Jack escaped?

“He destroyed it,” Jack sags. “The power, my powers, they were really his. He broke it to get them back and then he was going to…”

Take Jack's form. Overwhelm Jack's spirit, or soul, or whatever you wanted to call it with his own and become Jack Frost himself, wearing Jackie's shape like a suit of clothes.

“But he didn't, did he?” I get a tremulous head shake in answer. I'm so damned glad I taught him about the portals. If I hadn't- but I did. And the old man can't touch him here. “The Snow Queen explained it Jackie, but that doesn't mean-”

“I’m not even a proper person, spirit, whatever. I’m just a placeholder Aster! I’m tainted. I should be dead.” Jack gestures wildly, the hanging sleeves of my coat swinging with the force. He so sure of what he's saying. If I ever lay my hands on him, I'm going to kill Old Man Winter. 

“That's bullshit. Whatever the fuck he told you-” I argue and try reaching out again, wanting to reassure him.

“Don’t! Don’t touch me," Jack scuttles back. “I don’t know what he did to me. He was using my staff to twist my emotions. You have to stay away.” 

Curling my hands into fists, I take a moment to breathe. This is no time to be letting my feelings get the better of me. Try to be rational. Logic. Reason. Come on, it hasn't been that long, ya ruddy bastard. What had the Queen said? 

“It was your staff right, that's how he was affecting your powers?” Jackie nods warily. “If that was how he was influencing you, he won’t be able to now. Not as much anyway, even if there is a connection. He can't affect so much as a blade of grass in the Warren.”

“I-” Jack opens and closes his mouth before pulling his legs up to his chest and staring at his knees. “He said- said that he couldn't reach me here. It made him angry. That we were...” He lets the sentence trail off.

That we were… whatever we are? Yeah. Old Man Winter would've hated knowing he was with me, especially if he'd claimed Jack as his own. Jackie's not mine, not really, but maybe he could be. If we get past this. Maybe. Hell, there's a part of me that's his already, I know. No point in denying it. I wish I'd gotten the chance to tell him before.

Either way, I won't let anyone hurt Jack again.

“Damn right. The Warren's my domain. It's a place of power, Jackie. Nobody does anything here without my say so.”

“Except me,” came the soft reply. 

“Yeah, well. You're a special case,” I smile. Jack may have snuck in, but he'd never done anything malicious. If he'd been a threat, the sentinels and googies would've reacted. I'm still not sure what was it about Jack that calmed them, but I'm glad it happened.

“But it's wrong. I can still feel it, Aster.” He thumps his chest with a fist. “You shouldn't want me here. Why don’t you hate me? Why does everyone keep forgiving me? I’m no good for anything! I failed last Easter with Pitch and I abandoned the kids... Don't you get it? It wasn't just Old Man Winter. It's who I am. What I am. I could have killed you before. I’m a mess and no one should trust me with anything.”

Jack curls into himself so tightly he might up and disappear if he tries hard enough. What the hell am I supposed to say? We'd hashed out some of his insecurities months ago, but this? What Old Man Winter's done is well beyond the pale. It's going to eat away at Jackie like poison, the idea that he's fundamentally wrong because of how he was shifted. I'm not sure there's anything I can say that would register with him right now.

I need to show him. Show him that I care, that I trust him, and… oh. 

There's an idea.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

I keep ruining everything. There's nothing about me that isn't wrong. I was made wrong. I can't stop rubbing against that place in my chest where I can feel him. I think I might be sick. It's just waiting. Something dark. I wish he'd just let me die.

“Snowflake?” Aster's trying, he is, but I can't do this. I dig my fingers into the warm jacket and stare at the dirt. I'm going to have to go. Somewhere else. Somewhere I can't hurt anyone.

“Jackie, c'mon. I trust you. It wasn’t your fault.” 

“Aster-” An odd sensation ripples through the air and I glance up to see what he's doing. 

“I trust you.” Bunny's perched just beyond my feet, not quite touching me, and he's small. 

So small.

The knot in my chest breaks then, like dam, and I don't even try to stop it. Everything comes sobbing out. He scrabbles onto my knees and I snatch him up, curling around him. 

_Aster._

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I didn't- I'm sorry-” He just presses up under my chin while I ramble, rubbing against my skin and letting me cry. And cry. 

I have no idea how long we sit there like that, how long Bunny lets me make a mess of his fur with tears. Pretty sure his jacket's a disaster and I might be holding him too tight or yanking at his fur, but he doesn't seem to care. 

When the flood dies down, I sniffle and loosen my grip a bit, letting him scoot back.

“I'm so stupid. You were trying to protect me and I- I didn’t-” I didn't listen. Aster presses his little forehead against mine.

“I mucked things up too. We’ll talk about it later, yeah?” 

“Yeah,” Oh no. The kids. Anna had said- “Aster, they were after the kids.”

“It's all right. We know. Tooth's there now. The Snow Queen told us about what they did to the sprites.”

“I don't understand.” She'd helped them? There was the chocolate, but she hadn't warned me... Fuck, I'm confused.

“Apparently the Snow Queen's magic was bound to Old Man Winter until the bond was released. He forced her to help him.” That's why she kept changing, he was controlling her? Making her do things, say things? 

“He lied. They all lied.” Nothing that happened was real at all. “They were, they wanted… I’m so stupid! I thought they liked me. That they wanted me.” Of course they didn't. I should have known better. Aster hums sympathetically.

“For what it's worth, the Snow Queen was a wreck over it. She was worried sick with guilt.” 

“She made me eat the chocolate you dropped. Right before...” before I almost killed you. I don't finish the thought. If Aster had been really hurt, I'd never have forgiven myself. 

I don't really want to think about that again, so I lean back and let Bunny perch on my knees, resisting the urge to wipe my face with the sleeve of his coat. Mini-Aster is looking at me with an adorable amount of seriousness. I can't believe he did this. I missed him so much. 

“So,” he says after a while, “you try your powers yet?” 

“No. I couldn’t do much without my staff before.” What's the point? That's why Pitch had broken it in the first place after all. Asshole. “All those times my magic went off? It was because Old Man Winter could manipulate my staff.”

“What about your happy flakes?” Bunny's holds his little paws up and flicks one, mimicking me.

“Why?” 

“Because I can’t imagine that sort of magic coming from Old Man Winter.” One tiny eyebrow quirks up at me. Yeah, I guess that's true. Father Frost hadn't wanted me to work on it with him. The Snow Queen had asked about it though.

“What if-” What if it doesn't work? What if I really am just a shell of a spirit now? What if I'm useless?

What if I'm nothing?

“It's your centre. Just try, Snowflake.” Bunny twitches his little nose in annoyance, but all I can think is that he called me Snowflake again. Maybe it's stupid, but I really like it when he does. A lot.

“All right,” I agree, lifting and shaking my arm so the heavy sleeve rides up past my wrist. It probably won't work. Holding my palm up like always, I focus my intent and a snowflake sparkles into existence. 

Holy shit.

“See?” Bunny grins and bounces a little. Man he's cute. “There’s hope for you yet.”

Maybe he’s right. I flick it away and try a blast of snow, but nothing happens. Happy flakes but no ice and no frost. Could be worse, I guess. At least I'm not totally useless. I shrug a little and Aster bounces again on his toes, encouragingly. 

Okay, now I can’t help smiling. 

“It’s hard to take you seriously when you’re this cute.”

“Jack…” Bunny’s face screws up into an adorable frown. I laugh and grab his sides to rub my nose against his. Oh my God, is he purring?

“All right, all right, ya galah. You’ve had your fun.” He tries to sound gruff, but he’s pressing his head against mine comfortably. “Will ya listen for a minute?”

“Yeah.”

“I don’t care where you came from, Snowflake.”

“Aster-”

“I don't care,” he draws himself up as much as he can in his small bunny form. “None of the others will either. It's your choices that matter. Remember?” 

I do. I remember the discussion we'd had in the Workshop. How North had focused on moving forward instead of looking back and the others had agreed. Being a better person... Could I do that with Old Man Winter's magic infecting me?

“You didn't choose to do any of this, Jackie, but you did choose the oath and you've done your best as a Guardian since then, even with your memory problems and only handful of believers. You're stuck now and while we may not be perfect, we Guardians don't give up on our own. All right?”

“Yeah,” I nod, a little shaken by his faith in me. “I’m not going to be much use if I can’t even leave the Warren though. Old Man Winter will be waiting out there. I’ll be putting anyone I’m around at risk, Bunny.”

“The ritual he was planning was most likely meant for the Winter Solstice. It’d be ideal for the magic. If we can get you past that, we’ll have more time to deal with the situation.” The solstice. It makes sense now, looking back. No wonder he'd wanted me to blow off the Guardians and stay.

“When is it?” My sense of time has been out of whack since Old Man Winter captured me.

“Tomorrow.”

Tomorrow. Just a couple days. Then it'll be safer. Safer to do what though? I can't fly. I can't frost windows or start snowball fights or ... It really hits me then. 

I'm never going to get my powers back am I?

“Aster, what am I going to do?” My voice cracks and I reach for him again.

“We'll get it sorted. Somehow. All right?” Bunny cuddles up close to me. Even with the dark weight in my chest, at least I have him. Maybe the Guardians really will think of something.

I can only hope.


	20. Chapter 20

CHAPTER 20

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

My arms are pinned to my sides when I wake, panic clawing up my throat. No! I struggle to break free, gasp in a breath of air, and cough on a mouthful of fur.

What?

“Whoa there, Jackie. It's just me.” Bunny's breath is warm against my temple. He lifts one arm away and lets the other fall to the ground where it's pinned by my weight. He's big again. I must have drifted off for a minute.

“Sorry.” 

“No worries, mate.”

I stare at where my hands are sunk into his fur, pale fingers disappearing into the white and grey. My heart is still trying to break through my ribcage and it takes a minute or two to calm down. It feels like a lifetime since I meditated with Bunny. I'm finally warm, though. Must have been wrapped up in his arms for a while. The thought makes me a bit lightheaded. 

“Hey,” he gingerly pats my hair. “Feeling better?”

“Yeah.” Better than I should, considering what Old Man Winter did. I should have bruises at least. Whatever was in that potion did its job. 

I'm still wearing Aster's coat. Only his coat. My legs slide against his fur where the fabric has ridden up. It feels really good.

Crap. I bury my face in his ruff because otherwise I'm going to make an ass of myself. I'd had feelings about Bunny before Old Man Winter started jerking me around, which must have started close to when I froze that oak. He kept trying to convince me that the Guardians didn't understand me, that Bunny couldn't really love me. That means he was worried about it, doesn't it? 

No. Don't be an idiot. It was just another way to mess with me. Fuck. I want things back the way they were. Before… everything. When I had my burrow and Aster's friendship and he didn't have to keep saving me from myself.

“Jackie?”

“What?” My voice is muffled by his fur and he snorts.

“Come on. I won't bite.” Bunny's arms go back around me then, gently, and one hand rubs between my shoulders. I lift my head just enough to make eye contact.

“There you are.” Bunny looks a bit serious, even though he's got the tiniest smile on his face. He's trying to be comforting, but I can tell that he's worried. His eyes are so green. Warm and alive and totally focused on me. We're so close we could kiss.

Tawis had kissed me. Jerk. I think he might have been trying to help too, but what he'd done wasn't fair. He'd surprised me the first time and the second had actually hurt. 

Kissing supposed to be good. Or sweet. Or… something better. Like Steve and James. Not like what Tawis had done. 

“Jack?” Aster's brow furrows and I look away. Pookas probably don't even do kissing, but I bet Bunny would if I asked him, just to make me feel better. 

Yeah, that's exactly what I want. A pity kiss.

“What's the matter?” he asks. I manage not to hide again in his ruff but I can't look Aster in the eye. He's going to wait until I tell him something. I'm trying to think up some excuse, something less humiliating than wanting him to kiss away the memory of my awful first kiss, but before I can Bunny goes still and his ears fly straight up.

“Snow globe portal just opened. Must be North.” Bunny had always been sensitive to anyone entering or exiting the Warren, though his focus varies depending on where he is. He would sometimes miss it if I opened a fixed door, especially if he wasn't in the Warren, but any magical changes like snow globes or new tunnels he always twigged to right away.

I sit up and clutch the coat, looking around. I don't think I can deal with North right now. 

“Does he know I'm here?” Bunny nods, getting up on his haunches and offering me a hand. I stumble, but he steadies me with an arm around my waist. His arms are still bare since he changed size. 

“I sent off a messenger so the others would know you were safe.” 

I guess that makes sense. Safe in the Warren. Safe and useless, anyway. Old Man Winter can't kill me here but he's stripped away most of the power I had. Some Guardian I'll be. More of a burden than a help now. 

What else did Bunny tell them? They can't be too happy dealing with this right before Christmas. North shouldn't be leaving The Workshop this close to his holiday. What is he thinking?

Aster picks up his bracers and begins strapping them back into place. I glance at the clothing I'd tossed aside, the socks and shoes mocking me. Anna had put them on me, gently, tugging the laces tight like my father used to with my skates. 

No way am I wearing those things again. I don't care what the Snow Queen said. I'd rather face North naked. Maybe Aster has an old shirt or something?

“Umm, you don’t have any clothes lying around I can borrow do you?” 

“Actually, yeah,” he smiles at me shyly. “Was gonna be your Christmas present. Guess we're close enough though.”

He got me clothes? For Christmas? Bunny made me a _Christmas_ present?

“Tucked'em away in a drawer in my room. Go on,” he waves me off. “You've snooped around enough to know where I mean.”

Well, he's not wrong there. Aster turns and looks off in the distance, to wherever North is approaching from I guess. Better hurry up if I don't want to look completely pathetic when he gets here.

The door to Aster's burrow swings shut after I slip inside and the smell hits me before I can take another step. Not the plant life that decorates the walls, but the scent of bread and chocolate and carrot soup…

I'm starving.

I haven't eaten anything in weeks, just those few chocolates, and now that I'm here I realize just how much I missed it. I don't have time for anything more than a snack, though. Grabbing a few rolls of the heavy, grainy sort of bread that Aster favours, I leave the kitchen behind to search for my gift in his room. Never imagined plain bread could taste so good. I polish them off before going into Aster's room, brushing any crumbs to the floor in the hall. 

It's just the same as I remember. I start pulling drawers out, wanting to hurry before North decides to come looking for me. There are a few blankets and some other items of clothing, but I know right away when I find it, because it's wrapped. Not in the typically garish Christmas paper Bunny hates so much, but in plain white with a handful of little black and white sketches of snowflakes. A thin string ties it closed, the knot coming undone with a quick tug. I'm strangely grateful for that. Tearing the paper feels wrong somehow. 

On top is a white linen shirt with a v-neck that laces closed. It's simple and well made, a lot like the shirts my mother sewed for me, though Aster couldn't know that. I wonder where he got it?

Next there's a pair of pants, lighter in colour than my old ones, and they end in a wide cuff that laces closed just below the knee. Cool. No socks or shoes in sight. It's not a big thing but it makes me happy. I smile a little when I notice there's no underwear either, which is just fine by me.

I shove Aster's coat up on his dresser and pull the shirt on. It fits perfectly, giving me room to move. The pants are next. When I shake them out there's a soft thud as something falls to the ground. I don't see what it is at first glance, so I pull the pants on and tie the laces at the waist and cuffs. Wow. It's as well tailored as the shirt. The material stays snug but gives just the right amount when I drop into a crouch, scanning the floor for whatever I dropped.

I find the coiled belt just underneath the dresser, the leather unrolling easily in my hands. It's beautiful. I've never seen anything like it. I run my fingers over the swirls of the carved leather, the thick silver buckle, and the small silver snowflake rivets that pierce the belt every few inches.

I love it.

Aster made this. I can feel it. He must have made everything. My hands shake when I loop the belt around my waist twice. It's obviously decorative. Made for showing off because the pants don't need any holding up the way he's designed them. I have to see what it looks like.

I snatch up Aster's coat and open the large wardrobe where it used to hang. He must have been in a hurry before, when Anna had tricked Bunny into going to the glacier, because several things have fallen from their places. I have to block with my knees to keep it all from spilling out. I manage to get everything into place before I let myself look in the mirror on the back of the door.

Well, I'm not so fancy anymore. My hair is a mess and my face looks, what? Tired? Washed out? Old, maybe? I feel older. 

The clothes though, focusing on that makes me feel better, because they look good. No, not just good. They look like _me_. The ones the Snow Queen had made, I wonder if they'd been Old Man Winter's idea? Probably. These though? These were made by someone who knows me. New, but the same too. My past and my future. Looking in the mirror, I notice the swirls on the belt tilt and arc like tiny grins etched into the leather between the decorative curls. 

It should make me smile but the heaviness pulls in my chest and instead I end up crying. Again.

Goddammit.

I go back into the kitchen to scrub my face. North's voice booms from outside. Bet he's thrilled to be dragged away from Christmas preparations. I shouldn't keep them waiting. Tossing the damp cloth into the sink, I brace myself before venturing outside to face him. 

North and Bunny immediately go quiet. 

“Jack,” North says after a long pause of not saying what he's thinking. I can see it in his eyes, a terrible kind of sympathy like when we'd thought Sandy was dead. The bread sits leaden in my stomach. “You look good.” 

Liar. 

Aster has a small smile on his face and cocks an eyebrow in my direction.

“Oh. It, uh, it fits.” I ghost my fingers over the ridges in the belt. I'm not sure how to explain what it means to me without sounding like a sap. “Did you make it?”

“Yeah. Figured that hoodie of yours was nearly done for.” 

Yeah, the hoodie had been falling apart and I'd had the pants even longer. They were long gone now. I'd thrown away other old clothes before. The only ones I'd cared about were the first. That shirt and cloak were still safely tucked away, the threadbare garments buried in Burgess where I could go back for them. I used to think they might be important. A clue to my past. It's like a tiny grave now. Probably the only one Jackson Overland will ever have. I didn't leave behind a body and I don't have a headstone either. Mother couldn't have afforded it after I died. The graves where my brothers and my father were buried are grown over, one old marker with the numbers worn off half buried in the ground. Only mother and Bekah had proper graves, in the Bausman family plot.

“Ah, but there is more!” North lifts a bag from the ground. He unties the top and pulls out a mass of blue cloth, snapping it in the air. It catches the light and glitters, silvery patterns shifting and moving on the dark background. “The other half of your Christmas present!” 

“Um-” It's draped across my shoulders and that's when I figure it out, the clasp and the folds… wait. Sleeves? I fumble to secure the clasp that sits along my collarbone. A silver hexagon, embossed with the Guardians symbolic G. Then I find the sleeves and slip my arms through, not that you can tell there are sleeves. When I hold out my arms the cape drapes down to my elbows but when my arms are lowered my hands barely show. It's thick, the folds overlapping and flowing, and it should be heavy on my shoulders but the material practically floats along with me when I move. 

“Changed your mind again, did you?” Aster asks North. He sounds amused.

“Bah. What do we need with modern? We are Guardians! We should be timeless, and the jacket was so… practical. This,” North lifts the folds at the back and pulls a hood I didn't realize was there into place over my head. “This is more fun, yes?”

“Wow.” This is great! I want to say so, but the words collide in my throat and never quite make it out.

“Nice job on the rune work.”

“Thank you, Bunny.”

“Runes? Like magic?” I ask.

“Yes!” North runs his fingers along the front and I see the silvery lines flare. “I enchanted it myself.”

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

North puffs up with pride at his work, which I will grant shows a remarkable amount of craftsmanship even if it is showy as hell. The damn thing shimmers like mad. It'll probably calm down once it settles into it's owner.

Jackie certainly seems enthralled by it. 

Should have expected North to show up sooner rather than later, however much I wanted Jackie to myself. Ah well. The bastard had nearly talked my ears off about dark magic and protective charms while we waited for Jack. Apparently, he'd sent an urgent message off to the Williams, in the hands of two very insistent yeti, and gotten some of Ombric's old papers and a promise to do their best to find him in reply. 

I thought I'd come to terms with Ombric and his disappearing act but apparently not, because I can feel the old hurt rise up. I'm close with the Guardians in other ways, my relationship with North becoming almost brotherly over the past couple centuries, but Ombric had been my first friend. The first one to try and understand what it was like for me. I suppose I was more than a little bitter at how our roles had reversed and he'd become elusive and distant just as I was going in the opposite direction.

Strewth, would it kill him to drop in for tea now and then?

North's huge hand dwarfs Jackie's shoulder and Jack looks up at him with shining eyes, the fabric of the cape coat garment North whipped up in his imagination imbued with enough magic to make a formidable if glittery armour.

“We have not talked since our meeting, Jack.” Yeah. Pretty sure North's still concerned that the friendship he's built with Jack was undermined by the blizzard drama.

“I know. I'm sorry,” Jack hangs his head.

“Sorry? What are you being sorry for?” 

“For freaking out and not telling you guys everything.”

North looks back and forth between me and Jack in consternation, clearly irked that something's been left out. Right.

“Jackie thought Manny changed his mind about making him a Guardian,” I explain. 

“What?! Why would you think this? Manny would never!” Jack blinks at North's vehemence.

“I had a dream-”

“From Manny?”

“Yeah. It was… bad.” Bit of an understatement there, I expect. Jackie'd watched us tear him apart as far as he could tell. Makes sense that he would have been shaken by it. No wonder he took off. That would have been right before North told him about the blizzards and I shoved my foot in my mouth about Winter spirits too. Not that I turned out to be entirely wrong, unfortunately.

“It was broken, Snowflake,” North glances curiously at me again. “The dream was like mine, except Jackie only saw up to the part where the shadow Guardians attacked him.”

“Mussorgsky!” Jack is dragged into a hug he doesn't even attempt to resist. “I wish you had said, but I understand why you did not.”

“I'm sorry.” North shakes his head at Jack and sets him back, holding him firmly by the shoulders. 

“There is no need for sorry. You were afraid yes? And I did not help, the way I spoke about the blizzards.”

“It really wasn't me!” Jackie's eyes flit between North and I. “Old Man Winter, he did everything. Marzanna was helping him. He wanted you to hate me.”

“Morena,” I clarify and North nods grimly in understanding, releasing Jack to rub at his beard.

“Apparently, we have more enemies than we thought.” 

“I don't know for sure about the others...” Jackie offers warily. Yeah, he won't be trusting any of them now, no matter what they say. That's a bitter victory. Maybe I can give him some reassurance there?

“Flint was about half and half, bailing at the end to run back to his brother. He won't be bothering anyone for a while, so you can rest easy there. No idea about the Yuki Onna,” Yuki Onna, whether there's only one or more, is nowhere to be found. Maybe she'll be back helping Old Man Winter or maybe she took her chance to get out from under his control. “The Snow Queen isn't a threat though. She was bound and forced to do Old Man Winter's bidding. 

“Old Man Winter. I wish I had never spoken his name to you,” North grumbles, pacing across the grass, clearly feeling some guilt of his own over not seeing the old man for what he was. Hell, even I didn't think it could get this bad. “Is no matter, Jack. You are Guardian!”

“A Guardian with four believers,” Jack sags. 

“Five,” I point out. “You're forgetting Sophie.”

“I have plan about this-” 

“It won't work,” Jack interrupts North flatly, which might be best. Whatever he'd been planning, right now Jackie's safety was the priority. “My powers are gone. My winter powers anyway. Can't even whip up a decent snowball. I can still do happy flakes, but that's about it.”

“Old Man Winter did this?” North jerks to a stop, eyes wide with alarm.

Jack nods, fidgeting with his cloak.

North looks at me pleadingly. He wants to know what happened, needs to know, because that's his way. He wants to fix it. Only there's nothing he can do. Still, it had better be me giving him the bare bones of it so Jackie doesn't have to.

“It's like this, mate,” I begin.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

It's a relief when Aster gives North a quick rundown of what happened. I don't want to think about it again. How I'd trusted them, like family, and then Father Frost had torn me apart inside and out...

I should have trusted the Guardians. I mean, I know Old Man Winter was messing with my head, but still. And now? I'm not even Jack Frost anymore, not without my powers. 

“And where is the Snow Queen?” The mention of the Snow Queen grabs my attention and I start listening again. North looks furious.

“Ah, well. I couldn't tell you. Last I knew, she was saying something about General Winter, but I wasn't listening. I'd just felt Jackie pop into the Warren and I was a bit out of my head at the time.”

“General Winter?” North scratches at his beard. “We met, but were not overly familiar. He was very dour. Did you know him?”

“Yeah, while back. Talked with him a few times over the years while he was around.” Wait? Aster had been friendly with a winter spirit? We'd hadn't talked about the spirits he knew, only that most of the winter ones were nasty. I should have asked for details but instead I'd clung to North's recommendation of Old Man Winter, which had been wrong but even Sandy hadn't thought he was that bad. “I'm starting to think the reason he vanished wasn't as simple as fading.”

“Hmmm, he would not have stood for the dark magic that is being thrown about, yes?” Aster nods with a frown. I guess General Winter was more of a stand up guy. 

Of course he was gone.

“They might've killed him,” Bunny says, crossing his arms against his chest. “Ganging up, they'd have had a chance.”

“You know, there was another, wasn't there? I am sure Katherine had said, a snow maiden?”

“Could have been Chione. She was a quiet one. Old Man Winter's daughter, but they weren't close. She's gone now too.”

“Again we have been missing things,” North complained. “I am sorry about your winter friends, Jack.”

“It's okay.” It really wasn't, but I don't want him worrying about me. I tug at the hem of the cape. “This means more.”

I feel safer wrapped in these clothes, even if I am still contaminated. The Guardians keep trying, supporting me, doing their best. They deserve better from me, but I don't know what to do with myself anymore.

“Are you feeling better though?” he peers down at me searchingly.

“Yeah, but there's still a connection. I can feel the darkness inside me.” 

“Ah. Perhaps this I can help with,” North pulls out a vial. “Is a purge. Williams and I, after hearing about infected sprites from Bunny, we put our knowledge together and made this. Just in case. It is perhaps not so pleasant, but it should be very effective.”

“I- but the connection, it's part of me. I mean, he made me a spirit.” Bound me with his magic and the moonbeam. That's what he said.

“Did you feel this connection before meeting Old Man Winter?” North asks like he already knows the answer.

“Uh, no.”

“Or any darkness at all?”

“No… but it wasn't until Pitch broke my staff-”

“- that he could work his magic on you. And if he could begin it, then perhaps we can end it.” North thrusts to vial at me. “I know this day has been a trial for you, Jack, but just a little more. I promise, we will not let him have you.

I take it from his carefully and turn it in the light. It doesn't look like much. The fact that it's black and thick like sludge doesn't exactly inspire visions of thwarting the darkness but North is clearly confident in his work. Plus, Old Man Winter is a lying liar that lies. Maybe I should stop agonizing over what he said so much? Aster and North both think he was spewing bullshit anyway.

Guess it can't hurt to try.

North wraps his arms around me from behind when I uncork the top and lift the vial.

“Is all right, Jack?” He smells like gingerbread and fruitcake, and his beard tickles my cheek, tiny flecks of glitter still lingering in the white hair.

“Umm. Okay,” I knock the liquid back. Aster's standing to the side, watching me keenly. What are they expecting to happen? Nothing changes, but North wraps his arms a little more snuggly around my own, dwarfing me. It's not like a hug from Bunny, who isn't that much taller than I am. North, on the other hand, is massive. He makes me feel small, like a child. It's foolish. 

Then the heavy awfulness in my chest surges and burns. 

“Ah!”

“I've got you, Jack. Let it go.” North's voice is low and strong. Aster smoothes my hair back. My skin feels too tight. I can't breathe. The burning shoots up my throat in a flash and I vomit. Everything spins. I'd be face down in the dirt if North didn't have such a tight grip on me.

“H-hurts.”

“Maladyets, Jack,” North murmurs. “You're doing so well. I've got you.”

I lose it again, but it's not as bad this time. 

“I'll get something to help. Stay here a tic,” Aster nuzzles my hair briefly and then dashes into his burrow. I don't know where he thinks I'm going. North's still hugging me tightly and I can't even lift my head. At least the pain is gone. 

“Is all right. Bunny will be right back.” Another small heave wracks my body, but nothing comes out this time. Is it over?

A moment later the spinning slows and Bunny is there with a cup of something. North loosens his grip and sits me down on the grass, a thick arm holding me up from behind.

“Here,” Aster brings my hands up to hold the mug, his own around mine. “It's chocolate.”

I take a sip and before I know it I've gulped the entire thing down. Filling me and soothing the burn, I take a deep breath and then another. 

“Jack?”

“It's gone.” Bunny catches the mug when I drop it. “It's gone.” The weight, the draining heaviness… I stand upright, surprising North and Aster.

Everything is lighter and brighter and-

“Jackie-” I whirl around and laugh. 

“It's gone!”

It's only when North's chuckle registers that I realize I've thrown my arms around Bunny's neck and my feet aren't even touching the ground. Oops. Pretty sure I'm experiencing a full body blush. I drop down and step back.

“So,” he gives me a lopsided smile and rubs the back of his neck, “feeling better then?” 

“I feel amazing,” I answer, bouncing on the balls of my feet. I suddenly have so much energy, like the thing in my chest was a cork stopping everything up. I fidget with my cape to keep myself from reaching out and carding my fingers through Bunny's fur. I just want to touch him everywhere. 

“And where is my hug?” North grins widely, “I would like to take a little credit for the “amazing”.”

“You're the best!” I fling myself at him and hug North as best I can. He's so damn big. North had been the most welcoming of the Guardians that first meeting. He was the one that had explained about a centre, and who'd comforted me after Sandy, and he'd done all that even thinking I'd had a hand in the blizzards... 

Old Man Winter had kept me apart from the other Guardians but he'd been extra vicious ensuring that North wouldn't even lay eyes on me, hadn't he? Maybe because North wouldn't have run like the fairies, or been put off like Sandy, or been as easy to avoid as Bunny. North would have taken charge, demanded to know what was going on, and the whole thing would have unravelled. But between the blizzards and the resulting enraged and protective yeti it never happened. 

It could have been so different.

“Yes, I am quite impressive,” he replies, which spurs Bunny to roll his eyes dramatically. 

“Not too full of yourself, are ya?” North laughs again and I do too. Laughing. When was the last time I really laughed? It feels good. “Don't you have a holiday to manage?”

“Yes. Yes, I do,” North nods and I let him go so he can pick up his bag. “I am glad it worked so well, Jack.”

Bunny slaps him on the shoulder and makes a motion at the ground with his foot that has North backing away from the spot as though it's just caught fire. 

“Oh no. I have snow globe,” North holds up the glowing ball.

“Just offering,” Aster smirks.

“Stay safe. We will talk again after Christmas. I still owe you prank, yes?” He points at us and then shatters his globe, leaving in a blast of light. 

The prank. That was months ago. Back when things had been mostly normal. It hasn't even been a year since Aster found me and the yeti tossed me in a sack. 

“So.”

“So.”

“I'm still the Guardian of Fun,” I reach up to touch the large clasp with its raised Guardian symbol. North's not subtle in making his opinion clear.

“You are,” Aster tilts his head and waits. 

“I finally feel like myself again,” I wave at the dark mess on the ground, “without whatever the hell that was. But he took my staff, Bunny! My father's crook.” My voice breaks a little. I hate him so fucking much for that. 

“Snowflake-”

“I'm stuck here,” with anxious energy thrumming under my skin. I want to fly, but I can't. I can't do anything!

“Just for a bit,” he moves beside me, our shoulders brushing. At least I'm stuck here with Aster. That's not so bad, though when his fingertips graze mine it surprises me and I twitch away. I've melted down on him twice now. I don't want to be clingy. 

“Until after solstice, right?” Bunny nods at me and sighs.

“Yeah. After that, Old Man Winter might ease off, especially now that you've got your friends at your back. We'll deal with him and then ya can go wherever ya like.” He readjusts his bandolier, the same one he wore to the glacier with all the pouches. 

My friends. The Guardians. The kids.

“I want to see the kids.” I miss them. Especially Jamie. I really need to explain. I don't want them to be afraid of me or think I've let them down. We could still have some fun. Making snowballs the normal way can't be that hard.

“I'm sure we can-” Aster's ears flick up again sharply. What now? “That's the Burgess door.” 

I peer towards where the door opens. There a figure skimming along the ground. It's Baby Tooth. Wow. She's big. She's almost Sophie's size now. Aster's surprised too.

“You sneaky little sheila! You've been into my seed stores haven't you?” Bunny points at her as she pulls herself up just short of where he stands. “You shouldn't be-”

“Burgess,” she gasps in a girlish voice, trying to catch her breath. She can talk! And she sounds kind of familiar. I want to ask what happened, how she got so big, and where she got the tiny sword come from, but Baby Tooth turns her terrified eyes on me. 

Oh no.

“Help. We need help. Winter is attacking Burgess.”


	21. Chapter 21

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

“What happened?” Bunny says while I stand there stunned. 

“It's too much! There's a blizzard and giant snow monsters and those nasty sprites,” Baby Tooth tries to explain quickly, the force of her wings ruffling my hair. A blizzard in Burgess. Old Man Winter has to be the one behind it. 

This is because of me. 

“Right. I'll get what I need. Take the-”

“I'm coming with you,” I talk over Bunny's answer and he goes rigid. I can't stay here. Not while the kids are in danger. Not while it's my fault in the first place.

“No,” he snaps and bounds off towards his burrow, Baby Tooth flying by his side. Not fair. I try to keep up, but they're a lot faster than I am. “Baby Tooth, ya have go to North-”

“I'm not staying here while he tries to kill my believers!” I shout.

“-and ask for help. I know we can't risk Christmas this year, but he can spare a few yeti. Ruddy elves, even.”

“Aster!” I grab his arm when he finally stops at his door and I get within reach. Bunny rounds on me, scowling.

“Don't. You're powerless,” he thrusts a finger into my chest. “You were bloody shivering when ya got here. How do ya think a blizzard's going ta feel?”

“You don't have your powers?” Baby Tooth gasps, but I don't have time to explain anything to her. It won't be that bad, will it? I'm still a spirit. 

“I'm going.” 

“You're going ta get frostbite, is what you're going ta get, if one of'em doesn't kill ya outright.” Bunny leans forward, so wound up he's shaking with tension. 

“They won't-” In a flash, Aster grabs my wrist and lifts, hanging me in the air with my toes barely touching the ground. I flail against him, my cape flapping wildly, but he's too strong even when I've got both legs and an arm free. Shit.

“And you can stop them, can ya?” I manage to flip upwards and he releases his hold so I can land, a bit unsteady but at least I don't fall on my ass. Bunny glares at me with his arms crossed, fur all riled up and ears twitching. Baby Tooth hovering nearby in confusion.

Maybe Bunny has a point, but I know I'm right. I need to be there.

“Old Man Winter needs me in one piece, remember?” Aster's head snaps back, the stricken look on his face almost making me change my mind. “I- I have to do this. You can't keep me locked in, Bunny.”

And he thinks about it, I can see the determination on his face, and maybe he could tie me down or seal me in somehow, but I'm almost certain he won't. Bunny stares me down hard, Baby Tooth flitting anxiously around us, before he finally relents, closing his eyes in painful resignation.

“Fine,” Aster rubs a hand across his face. “Not like you're going to listen anyway, is it?”

“I-” crap, now I feel like shit. Dammit. “Bunny, I'll be careful.”

“Bloody oath, you will. You'll stay with me. No running off.” He leans in close again, eyes boring into mine, trying to brand the order into my thoughts. 

“Yes. Absolutely,” I agree to his demand without really thinking about it. Of course I'm staying with him. 

Aster breathes out and mutters something in Pookan that could be a curse or a plea before he straightens with determination.

“Where do we find Tooth?” he demands from Baby Tooth. 

“At the children's school.” Bunny nods and shoves the door open to hurry inside.

“Guess you better go.” I offer a weak smile to Baby Tooth and she throws herself at my chest, giving me a squeaky hug before flying off towards the door closest to the Workshop. I wish we had more time. Now I know why she kept squirreling away seeds though. I wonder if Tooth noticed that she was speeding up her growth? And her voice. Maybe if we get a chance to talk later, I can figure it out. If we- no. When. When we get through this.

I catch up with Aster in the chocolaterie, a small pile of objects rapidly disappearing into his pouches.

“What about Sandy?” If Baby Tooth was asking North for help, maybe he'd set off the Aurora? 

“He was supposed to be arguing with Mother Nature,” I can't see Bunny's face but I can hear the concern in his voice as he finishes stocking his bandolier. “She's a tricky one though. It'll probably come to nothing. Might take him some time, but Sandy'll come looking for us when he gets back. North'll send help too. We'll face Winter together.”

Winter. Cold, vicious, and mostly to do with death Bunny had said. Old Man Winter hit all three. He'd been so casually cruel when we'd met in Burgess, how had I missed that? He doesn't care about humans. Fuck, he'll probably freeze the whole town to death if it gets him what he wants.

And what he wants is me.

A panicky feeling washes over me, like I'm drowning, but it's not as heavy and suffocating as before. I won't let it win. 

“Jackie?” Aster puts a hand on my shoulder and the fabric of my cloak shimmers happily. “You can still-”

“You should get your coat,” I suck in a breath and shake him off. Pull it together, Jack. Now is not the time to let how messed up you are get in the way of being a Guardian. 

“Nah,” Bunny bows his head. “This time I'll stick with the chocolate.” 

“I finally get to see the chocolate thing?” That would be awesome, even if it is because we'll be fighting for our lives.

“If Old Man Winter's gone all out, I be giving my new batch a test run all right.” I watch Bunny check his boomerangs and… fuck. What am I doing? I don't even have a weapon or anything. No staff, no powers. Suddenly, my fingers ache with the need to hold onto something. 

“Missing your staff?” Aster asks, reading my mind, or maybe I'm just that obvious.

“Yeah.”

“Come on, then.” I really hope he isn't going to try and teach me to throw a boomerang. I'm pretty desperate though. Maybe I could bludgeon someone with one?

Bunny leads me into the room that has all those eggs, like a collection or museum. I pause outside the door to watch him, but Aster doesn't stop to look at the artifacts or even the globe, which is smaller than North's but still really neat. Instead, he plucks something off the far wall. It looks like a staff. It's long and ornate, and there's a notch at the end where something used to sit. Maybe a blade?

“Try this,” he thrusts it at me and I take it in hand. 

The staff feels light. Literally, like light. It isn't glowing or anything, but it's there. I twirl it in my hands, half expecting the smooth length of it to slip in my grasp, but it slices through the air exactly where I want it to go. It makes me feel a bit giddy.

“I used that back when we were battling Pitch and the fearlings. It's just a glorified stick now, but I thought, maybe...” Bunny trails off, watching me swing the staff around, finding its balance point. 

It's not like my crook at all. Too straight and smooth. There's nothing I could use to perch on top, either. It was made for something else entirely. Something special.

“What kind of magic is it?” 

“What do ya mean?” Bunny's staring. “It's not enchanted.”

“It's all lit up inside. Can't you feel it? Maybe it's because of the moonbeam?”

“What moonbeam?” The dumbfounded look on Aster's face is a first. Wait, didn't I tell him about the moonbeam thing? 

“Nevermind. I'll explain later. We have to hurry, right?” 

“Right.” 

Aster opens a tunnel and I trip over my feet dropping inside. Damn it. Bunny just hauls me up and onto his back, the staff going around and across the front of his shoulders, before he breaks into a run. The ride only lasts long enough for me to realize that Old Man Winter is going to target Jamie first. My first believer. My family. 

And then we're there.

A blast of cold hits me as we emerge. Wow. At least the clothes help. When I drop down and my feet touch the ground, I suddenly understand why people endure wearing shoes. For a moment it stings, but then it fades and I get used to it. This isn't so bad.

“Bunny!” Tooth surges towards us through the swirling snow. The school is besieged by snow and ice, hulking snow giants slowly trudging up the white lawn.

Mini fairies and ice sprites are locked in aerial battles all around us.

“What do ya need?”

“The sprites and weather are bad enough, but the giants! They're getting too close. I can't focus on them and everything else.” 

“Better be me then. Jack-”

A sprite nips in close and I instinctively swing at it, smacking it away with the staff. The creature lets out an inhuman screech and explodes. Both Tooth and Aster look at me in horror. “I didn't know it would do that!”

“Light. Of course!” Aster exclaims. “It's still imbued from the relic...” 

“That's your staff?” Tooth's eyes somehow widen even further. “I thought you stripped the magic.”

“I did. The wood must still remember.” Aster runs a hand along the length reverently. I'm a little worried about what that means. 

“Remembers what?” Another sprite flits by, but neither of us reacts. If Marzanna and Old Man Winter warped the sprites, we should be trying to help them, not blow them to smithereens.

“The first light. Pure light from the creation of the universe.” Bunny gives me an awed look. “You can feel it?” 

“Yeah. Is that weird? It feels good, like the Warren.”

“Jack-” he says, before we're interrupted by Tooth's cry.

“Bunny!” She lifts a sword and points at the snow giant closing in on the front doors. Bunny's distraction vanishes instantly.

“Right,” and Aster pops something into his mouth. Chocolate? His body kind of ripples and shift sand then… Oh yeah, that was definitely chocolate. 

Holy shit.

That is so, so not a bunny. Aster has definitely drifted from the Pooka he was, but wow, I am very aware of the alien aspect of him now. He's massive, bigger than North, and his muscles move underneath his pelt unnaturally. Or not. How would I know? Fuck, he's an alien. And the arms. How does he keep track of them all? 

He looks back at me, green eyes ringed with black, muzzle twisted fiercely.

“Stay.”

I nod and before my chin is back up again he's across the yard and on the first snow monster.

He's amazing.

“Jack,” Tooth snaps to get my attention. “Bunnymund can handle this. I'm going to circle the perimeter. Keep anything else from reaching the children.”

“Yeah, sure.” Bunnymund. I've never heard any of them call him that. He hasn't done the chocolate thing in a long time though, since before he shifted I guess. Maybe that's why?

I clutch the staff and take one last look at the chaos of fighting fairies and sprites. Egg Sentinels that Aster must have summoned appear in the near white out conditions. At least they won't feel the cold. It's not getting to me that much actually, but I don't really have a sense of what normal would be in this situation. I tug the cape around myself a little tighter, just in case. 

There isn't a whole lot for me to do with the fairies running interference. I'm stuck watching, the light in Bunny's staff gives me some confidence that I'm not totally defenseless. Wish I still had a little of my power. I can't feel the wind like I used to and this is the first time I've ever had trouble seeing through snow. I'm pretty useless. 

The doors to the school rattle in the wind, beckoning to me. 

Maybe I should go find the kids?

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

Another giant collapses into lifeless chunks of snow but more and more appear on the edge of the storm. I glance back to the front of the building, but the snow keeps me from seeing where Jackie should be, guarding the doors.

He's too far. Can't have him closer though. The giants are too strong. One hit and Jack would be feeling more than bruises. Without his power he's slower, not as nimble, with no real offensive magic to help him. I doubt the magic left in the staff would help against pure brute strength. 

Wish he'd have seen reason and stayed in the Warren. Not that I can fault him. He's feeling it keenly, this Winter disaster, likely taking all the blame onto himself. Old Man Winter's been controlling his life for centuries, wearing Jackie down. He'd have been easy prey if he hadn't gotten mixed up with the Guardians.

The battle rages on as relentless as the storm. The fairies are barely holding their own against the sprites, most of the fighting in a full out frontal assault as Toothiana keeps them from slipping through, absorbing wounded as she goes.

Old Man Winter is nowhere to be found. 

The snow giants don't react to being attacked other than to swing their arms like clubs. No pain, no thought, just mindless plodding. The heavy packed snow of their bodies is reinforced with ice and rime. Tearing into them is next to impossible, but I get one on the ground and it comes apart under my fists. I discover pretty quickly that the torso has to be completely destroyed. Makes sense I suppose. It's not like they have brains in their heads.

Can't feel the cold much. Chocolate's got me running high and eager for a fight. Least I can think. Two batches back, the chocky muddied up my thoughts too much. This one is all right, strong and fast. Not sure if it's this batch or the ever present wind mucking with my hearing though.

Halfway through my third giant a shrill cheer goes up and tiny bodies flee past me in a panic. Something's spooked the winter sprites but good. A splash of red catches my eye. Toothiana is hovering next to a figure that blends into the snow so well, only her inky hair and crimson sash let me make her out.

Yuki Onna.

I finish the giant and join them, the next plodding monstrosity a ways off with my sentinels doing their best to slow the things down. The fairies are buzzing and regrouping, tired and cold.

“I have no desire to see the children harmed,” the Japanese winter spirit answers a question I've missed.

“Just the children?” 

“Where is Old Man Winter?” Yuki Onna ignores my growl in favour of Tooth's question, her fairies rallying behind her and heading out again to slow the approach of the snow monsters or circle the school defensively.

“We are old, my sisters and I, and have never had patience for those who would disrespect or underestimate the power of our season. Most especially parents who would lose their children to the cold. The children themselves are innocent and deserve better.”

“You kept them.” The children who vanished in the storms. I can see it in her face. Yuki Onna smiles.

“I chose to serve Old Man Winter out of curiosity and concern when he began to interfere with the Guardians. I will ensure that the sprites stay away for now.”

“What about your sisters? Will they help?” Tooth is hopeful but I know they won't. They don't care for anything but their own desires. This one would probably snatch the children up given half the chance.

“No.” There ya go.

“Do you know where Old Man Winter is?”

“No.” 

“Can you stop the blizzard?” 

“No,” she replies, making me want to shake that calm smile off her face, but she vanishes into the drifting snow as though it's blown her away. Selfish witch. I smash my fists into the ground instead. Tooth glares.

“Take it out on them, Bunnymund,” she orders, swinging her sword towards the outline of giants lumbering forth. 

Fair enough. Without the distraction of the sprites, we should be able to stop this. Side by side, we charge the line but the closer we get, the more I can see through the blizzard. 

Bloody hell. They've multiplied.

My egg sentinels lie toppled in the snow, held down by the felled bodies of the monsters. The ground is littered with fallen fairies, swatted out of the air, wings bent and broken. Toothiana snatches them up as she forges on, swords flashing, knocking out legs and arms. I grab an arm and throw the giant into one of its clones. It's not enough. I'm grateful Jackie's back by the school, where there's some shelter, when the storm roars with renewed force and the temperature drops. Lower. Then lower still.

Someone is feeding the blizzard. 

The sudden agony in my side tells me who, a blade of dark ice slicing clean through one of my arms and scoring my chest.

Morena brandishes the bloodied weapon with glee.

“You've so many of those, you won't miss a few will you?”

“Bunny!” I wave Tooth off. Better she focus on the giants. The stump on my left is already sealing itself shut.

“If you've come for Jack-” she laughs at me, kicking the arm that's now frozen over in the snow. 

“Oh I'm looking forward to seeing Jack. His body anyway. We're going to celebrate. Winter's making all the preparations. Except for my part,” she lunges at me again and I twist away from the thrust of her blade. How did she get so fast? Must be the dark magic. It oozes from her like a sickness.

“And what would that be then?” Her smirk as she licks her sword makes my stomach turn.

“Dinner.”

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

The empty classrooms and hallways are eerie. I've only been here a handful of times, but always when the kids were around. The storm outside has made it even darker than it should be and the lights are dim, the bright festive colours of the decorations muted by shadows. 

Where would the put the kids? Lunch room maybe? I walk quickly down the hall, leaping over fallen backpacks as I go. Nothing. Then, I pick out a few voices echoing along the corridor despite the howling of the wind.

The gym. That makes sense. All the kids would fit and there are hardly any windows. I slip inside when a pair of older students leave for a bathroom break.

“Jack!” Pippa screams at me when I enter the gymnasium and I'm immediately mobbed by kids. They almost knock me off my feet.

“Jack!”

“Where were you?”

“That's Jack Frost!”

“Did you stop the snow storm?”

“He has a cape!”

What?

Pippa, Cupcake, and Monty have pushed to the front but they're flanked by a group of smaller kids looking at me with amazement.

Looking at me. 

“You can see me?” A sea of nods knocks the breath out of me. I have believers. Too many to count with a glance.

“Cupcake's a kindergarten helper. She's been telling them stories,” Pippa explains and Cupcake blushes.

“And Monty and Pippa are in the choir, they've-”

“We have a song!” One of the other children cries out. “A Jack Frost song for the concert!”

I have a song? They're all wearing blue and have little white snowflakes pinned to their sweaters. Some of them are clutching folders with “Jack Frost” spelled out in glitter. Everything stutters to a halt in my head. 

My believers did this. I ignored them and I was such a mess… I...

I think I need to sit down.

“Jack, are you okay?” Monty pats my arm. “Jamie said you weren't feeling well.”

“Jamie,” and the dread comes rushing back. “Jamie! Where's Jamie?” I search the crowd in a panic. 

“He's was here a minute ago.” Oh no. 

“Are there any other doors?” And teachers. Shouldn't they be watching the kids too?

“At the back and off the stage,” Monty points to the stage at the far end of the gym and then shoves his glasses back up his nose. “Emergency exits. But we're not supposed to open them because-”

An alarm goes off.

“Jamie!” I dash around the kids. I don't have any wind or power to help me. All I can do is brace myself and run through the adults grouped along the side, trying to ignore the awful sensation that pulls at me. I get there just as the first teacher does, door wide open, both of us desperately searching the storm for a sign of whoever opened it.

The small footprints in the snow are whisked away by the wind an instant after I see them.

Jamie.


	22. Chapter 22

CHAPTER 22

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

I jump out of the way when the teacher yanks the door shut. It's getting darker by the minute with the sun slowly going down and the clouds blanketing the sky. The howling wind sounds almost mournful and everything is grey and white in the near darkness, the snow in the air making it nearly impossible to see more than a few feet. I look up and see that the emergency light over the door is cracked from the cold. Must be worse than I thought. 

I have to find Jamie. 

Pulling my hood up, I keep against the wall to think. Okay. I know the other kids will tell the teachers, but none of them are going to be any help. How could normal people manage in this? 

The mini fairies though... They were swarming all over the schoolyard before. Where did they go? I scan the sky for signs of life, but there's nothing. Crap. Maybe I should go back around front first? 

No. I'd have to fight against the wind and I don't have time. They've got enough to deal with anyway. I'll… think of something. Old Man Winter is probably setting a trap for me, but he can't control me anymore and I have a weapon. That's something, right? Gripping Aster's staff, I try and let its light bolster me, running my fingers over what were likely once egg-shaped curves. Somehow I have to figure out-

Oh. Old Man Winter must expect me to know where to go already. That's why he wiped away the footprints. Fucking head games. They're at the lake. I could find the lake in my sleep.

I walk quickly and the wind ruffles my cape, yet it never flips up into my face like it probably should. And the snow... it looks powdery on the ground but my feet don't sink. A few more sure footfalls and I'm confident enough to start running. If I could ride the wind... That's a pointless hope. The wind won't ever listen to me again. 

At least, Old Man Winter probably won't hurt Jamie. Not yet. Not until I'm there. I'm worried about him out in the cold though, because I doubt Old Man Winter cares if Jamie gets frostbite. I run as fast as I can given that I can't see more than a few feet in advance. Smacking into a tree is the last thing I need. 

It feels like forever before I think I'm close, then the wind and snow part with a gust, letting through a faint light and making it easier to sprint the rest of the way to the lake.

Yeah. Totally a trap.

It's awful and it's perfect. Almost exactly the way I'd have it myself in the dead of winter, with solid clear ice and a light snow falling gently, muffling the sound. Old Man Winter's purple coat is a vivid splash of colour where he stands with a hand on Jamie's shoulder, waiting at the centre of the lake.

A dark crack in the ice snakes underneath Jamie's right shoe.

“Jack,” he greets me warmly, fatherly just like before. Manipulative asshole. 

“Let Jamie go!” 

“My boy, I-”

“Shut up! It's me you want. Let him go.” I leap over a boulder on the shoreline. Jamie's shivering violently, gritting his teeth in the cold. He doesn't even have his coat on! Only his sweater, with its little paper snowflakes in tattered pieces, wool bunched up where Old Man Winter's fingers hold him fast. 

“Stop,” I'm a few steps onto the lake when Old Man Winter speaks. “Your word first.”

I catch him glaring at my cloak. The runes are skittering around on the fabric like they're upset, making me even more grateful for North's efforts.

“About what?”

“Your word that you'll submit to your fate.” My fate? No way. 

“What you did to me is gone and the Guardians are taking down your army right-” I start to argue, trying to convince him to stop all this, but Old Man Winter gives me an indulgent look and flexes his fingers. My heart twists in my chest and turns to lead. 

Oh God. It's still there. How can it still be there?

My cloak flutters and fusses, but it can't protect me from myself. 

“Nothing will ever break the connection between us, Jack. You've purged the work I've done over these past weeks, but the anchor remains, part of your very core.” The heavy despair that I couldn't shake before rears up to hover on the edge of my thoughts. “I know you can feel it. You'll always be mine, my boy.” 

No. It's not fair. Tears are freezing on my cheeks as they fall and I can't… I can't win. He's right. It'll never go away. I'll always be-

“J-Jack?” Jamie stutters, shaking in cold terror on the lake. What do I do? Old Man Winter locks his gaze to mine and nods encouragingly. Can I really give him what he wants?

Maybe… maybe that's all I'm good for now anyway. My powers are gone. I'm tainted and useless. The other Guardians, they'll keep everyone safe. 

No one actually needs _me_. 

“Okay,” I whisper. For Jamie.

“What was that, my boy?” He asks but smiles knowingly.

“I said okay.” It's an effort to unclench my fingers from Bunny's staff, but I let it go and it drops to the ice, scattering the shadows. “I'll do whatever you want.”

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

This is taking too bloody long. The snow monsters have advanced and I can't take my attention off Morena for a second. I've lost another arm, though I've plenty more, and the chocolate high is coming off its peak. I'm out of shape. Haven't fought like this in far too long. At least Morena's down to one eye. Sacrificed my last boomerang to land that blow.

She takes another swing and I bound away, hoping to draw her off a little more. I don't know what's feeding into her strength, but she's doing her level best to exhaust me, gleefully taking most of the hits I've gotten in. Morena's sword of dark ice keeps reforming while my boomerangs are lost somewhere in the storm, impossible to find. And though my Pookan style bracers are sturdier armour than they look, my eggs bombs are about as useless as tits on a bull with this wind. If I could just get hold of her. 

I evade Morena's downward strike and send her into the snow with a shove. She's back on her feet in a flash. Not sure how I'm going to manage her relentless attacks if I start to slow down. Unfortunately, the fairies aren't any help. They need assistance more than I do. I still have chocolate, which is an option, but doubling up may have... unexpected effects. Might have to risk it if this keeps on. 

Hesitating on the chocolate turns out to be a mistake. Once she rebounds, Morena doesn't give me any quarter, not even to flip open a pouch. Stabbing, slicing, her speed and strength making up for what she lacks in technique. Bloody dark magic indeed. I hiss at her when she manages to score an angry line up my thigh. Damn. She's done wasting her time whittling down my arms then. 

Whipping a chunk of frozen snow in her direction, I fumble with my bandolier while she's forced to block with her sword. Before I can find what I'm looking for, a roar behind me sets my fur on end and I grin. Finally! Morena curses at the light dancing across the snow, raising an arm to shield her eyes.

Yeti. At least a dozen charging through the portal.

“The snow giants!” I shout. “Help the fairies.”

The yeti stomp past and I think we might manage, but my distraction costs me. Morena leaps forward, catching me in the leg. I'm just fast enough to move with the hit, so it's the flat of her blade that makes hard contact, sending me sprawling onto the packed snow without slicing me through. 

“Got you!” she cries, plunging her sword down. Before I can react, I'm shoved with force across the ground. Morena misses, her blade crunching into the snow. 

“Okay?” Baby Tooth blinks her big blue eyes at me, her matching iridescent feathers more blue than green now. Morena frees her sword and turns to face a smaller, but equally armed Baby Tooth, both of them lit up in the encroaching night by a golden glow.

Sandy.

“This is very wrong,” says a strange, strained voice. Strewth. He actually got her to show up.

“What are you doing?” Morena's protests briefly halt her attack, her voice ringing across the yard. The blizzard is gone. “You can't stop the storm!”

“I think you'll find that storms are something I understand very well,” Mother Nature sweeps forward, unnaturally tall and elegant, even larger than life than she used to be. Storms were always her thing, weren't they? Even before.

Sandy floats down and nods at me.

“Well done, mate.” The yeti are making short work of the snow monsters now that they don't have any storm magic giving them strength. Baby Tooth helps me to my feet, keeping her sword at the ready and an eye on Morena while she does.

But apparently I'm no longer her target. Morena snarls and launches a desperate attack on Emily Jane, who merely holds out a hand and catches her by the forehead before she strikes. Morena's futile struggles and slashes are almost comical.

“I am winter and death and nightmares-” she screams, not realizing that Sandy's dreamsand has curled around until it's too late. She shrieks as it leeches something out of her.

“Nooooo!” She flails, cutting wildly through the sand. Sandy hardly notices. A thin strand plucks the blade from her grasp.

“I'm no sorcerer, nor is my friend. However, St. North seemed to think this would do,” Mother Nature holds a clear vessel in her palm and Sandy funnels the smoky essence he'd extracted into it. It seals with a cheery jingle of bells. They must have gone to The Workshop when they couldn't find me. 

“I hate you,” Morena sags like a puppet with cut strings, dropping to her knees. “I hate you all.”

Not like the sprites then. She wanted the darkness.

Emily Jane blinks at her indifferently. Sandy has more sense and restrains Morena with golden ropes. The sword of dark ice lays on the ground and Baby Tooth shatters it with the pommel of her own weapon. This time, it doesn't reform.

“Where's Old Man Winter?” I try demanding. I get nothing. Whatever power had been fueling Morena was snuffed out now. She's a huddled wreck, one of her braids missing, eye fused shut, clothing torn up and bloody. Sandy's restraints might well be the only thing keeping her upright.

“… hate you...” she whispers again. Useless.

“Where's Jack?” Baby Tooth asks, glancing around now that the white out conditions have dissipated.

“By the front-,” I begin to say, but he's not there when I look. He's gone. Oh no.

“He went inside,” Toothiana swoops in, placing a hand on one of my arms. “Some of the fairies saw him, but then the wind went wild and they weren't able to properly circle the school. I'm sure he's fine.”

Sandy flings around a series of images. Leave him to manage this mess. Make sure the kiddies are all right. Find Jack. 

I sure as hell don't need telling twice.

“I'm coming too.” Fair enough. Baby Tooth has no trouble keeping up with me, her increased size making no difference to her speed. When this is over, I owe her a proper thank you for saving my arse. 

I'm taken aback when we get to the glass doors of the school, though. Aren't I a sight, all blood and claws, missing limbs? I'll scare the ankle biters to death like this.

“Baby Tooth, do a quick check and let Jack know I'm out here, will ya?” She nods and zips off. 

I fuss a little and attempt to remove the worst of the blood with snow. Looks worse than it is. Hope Jackie's all right. This whole ruddy mess hasn't been easy on him. Leastways we got that muck out, thanks to North. If we can rout Old Man Winter once and for all, things might get back to normal, or closer to. 

Normal. Not even sure what that'll be now. I know Jack's feelings have been meddled with. Since the Memory Box Incident things had been building between us. Support and friendship to start, and then? Feelings. Sandy'd figured it out before I had, but yeah. I should tell him, I know, but after he'd purged, Jackie had, well... he'd pulled back pretty fast hadn't he? Hadn't wanted my comfort. He'd managed for years on his own, in the Burrow even, before his staff had been broken and Old Man Winter found the weakness. He'll be stronger when this is done. Won't need an old codger like me to lean on anymore. Jackie'll want space.

Doesn't mean I'm not going to drop him straight into the Warren first chance I get. He can rail all he likes at me later about the indignity. With the kiddies safe, he can lay low again until we deal with Old Man Winter.

I'm shocked out of my thoughts when Baby Tooth flings herself out of the doors with a bang.

“Jack's gone! Jamie went missing and-”

“Jack went after him,” I finish for her and curse. I'm not even surprised. The old man must've had it planned from the start, been watching us long enough to know what we'd do. Damn, I should've known. Where would they have gone? Can't be far. Jackie wouldn't be able to follow. The lake. Has to be.

“The Lake.” Baby Tooth doesn't need any more than that. She's off in an instant. With the storm gone, she's fast and nimble in the air while I'm leaping over snow drifts and struggling to keep my footing. There's no telling how long they've been gone. Anything could have happened by now.

I can follow the bright blue blur of Baby Tooth darting ahead without too much trouble. I'm through the trees and nearly there when I stumble to stop. Baby Tooth has drawn up short, sword at the ready. Standing between the barren trees is a familiar figure. 

Yuki Onna. Again. 

“B- Bunny?” Jamie's face peers out of the darkness. The kid breaks away from her side and half runs half trips over to me, not even a little put off by the remaining blood and gore. I scoop him into my arms tight. He must be half frozen.

“It's all right. I got ya. Where's Jack?” The boy clenches his hands in my fur.

“There was... a man. He was arguing. With Jack. I- I'm not sure. Jack promised he'd do what he said.” 

He'd traded himself for Jamie. Of course he had.

Jamie shivers against me. No jacket, no hat… he'll get frostbite soon enough.

“On the lake?” Jamie nods weakly. 

“Give him to me. I'll care for him.” Yuki Onna says. I don't know if this is the same spirit as before or not. Either way, she's going home empty handed.

“Stay with him,” I order Baby Tooth and thump a portal into the ground, watching them disappear into the warmth. Once they're gone, I focus on the Yuki Onna. She cocks her head at me.

“I wouldn't have harmed the boy.”

“You-” The snow whirls around us, cutting me off.

“You should hurry,” she vanishes, taking the snow with her. I glance around to make sure she's gone and realize what she's done. Where the hell am I?

Bloody witch! 

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

My cape is on the ice in a glittery heap, pushed up against the rocks where he'd made me throw it away, and the staff is still where I dropped it. I hope North and Bunny aren't mad. I tried. I did.

At least they won't be fooled into thinking he's me.

“It's almost time now. You've been so good, Jack,” Old Man Winter smoothes my hair back from my brow, my knees aching against the hard surface of the lake. The ice creaks ominously. I want to crawl away, but I can't. At least Jamie's gone. Safe. Somewhere. 

Even my happy flakes won't come now. I'm empty. And cold.

I didn't stay like he'd told me. Couldn't. I'm sorry Bunny. 

I should have asked him to kiss me.

“You did the right thing, my boy. The children, they'll keep their belief in the others and stay safe and warm. You'd only bring them peril. Winter is harsh and bitter. Cold and empty. That's what we are.” A little flurry of snow shakes off of him where he stands over me. “You were never meant to be a Guardian. You understand that now, don't you?”

He pauses expectantly and I nod. Old Man Winter is right. The only reason the Man in the Moon picked me was to try and prevent this. Not because I deserved it. How could I? I ruin everything. No one needs me. 

“Good. It's fitting. The Solstice. You and I. Death and rebirth. And you'll finally be at peace. No more loneliness. I promise.” He's trying to be kind. I almost believe him. 

Then the ice cracks loudly.

“I am sorry.” It's the last thing I hear before the ice buckles and I'm plunged into the freezing water. Cold and dark. 

No! No, please. Not this again.

I thrash, desperate for something, anything to hold onto. Old Man Winter is there somewhere, his hands tight on my shoulders, unfeeling and relentless. Nothing I do matters. Water fills my mouth when I cry out. The belt Aster made me is sitting heavily around my waist and I'm struck by how desperately I don't want Old Man Winter to have it, to have anything of mine. But there's nothing I can do. I'm drowning, choking on water and darkness. Eventually I go limp, looking up one last time through the hole in the ice. The moon glows where the clouds have parted. 

Help me. Please. I don't want to die. Not like this. 

But it's not like before. The moon is hardly there at all. Just a sliver. And I think it looks a little like a smile right before everything goes black.


	23. Chapter 23

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Light seeps through my eyelids, my skin tingles and I feel strangely warm.

Huh.

Am I dead? Really dead this time?

“Hello, Jack.” My eyes fly open to see a man sitting next to me. He's wearing a three-piece suit with a bow tie. I must be dreaming. “Of course you are.”

“What?” I jolt upright, the question harsh after his soft, almost musical words. 

“This is a dream. The rules here are a little different than you might be used to,” he smiles at me. There's a curl of hair jutting up from the top of his bald head and he's the most friendly and unthreatening person I've ever met. It makes me a little panicky.

No one's that nice. 

Wait. This is a dream. That means-

“Yes. I am the Man in the Moon. Tsar Lunar. Tsar Lunanoff. Manny. Whichever of those names gives you pleasure. I'm not particular.”

“Holy shit.” I gasp after the exclamation escapes. Fuck, I cursed at the Man in the Moon. The short man, well, shorter than me but taller than Sandy, chuckles, his little hair curl bobbing.

“It's quite all right. I've seen and heard rather a lot over the years. There's very little that will shock me.” Guess not if he's been watching over Earth for centuries. I was never quite sure how long he was supposed to have been up here. “The dream machine is working much better now. Quite improved. It wasn't until the moon mice found the last of the remains of my- ah well. I doubt you're interested in the technicalities. What's important is that we can finally speak properly.”

“You've been trying to talk to me?” Since when? I thought he didn't know what Old Man Winter had done?

“Oh my yes, for a very long time. I am sorry. I was distracted and remiss in seeing what was happening. So wrapped up in what Pitch was doing…” he frowned for a moment, “but I cannot change the past. Or, rather more accurately, should not. Nothing ever good comes of that sort of meddling, as I'm sure Bunnymund could attest.”

“Yeah, he might have said something like that once.” Aster had complained about the whole time travel thing. I hope he and Tooth are doing all right in the blizzard. Maybe dealing with me will slow Old Man Winter down enough to give them a better chance.

Manny blinks at me, faint golden eyelashes fluttering. The eye contact is kind of awkward. It's hard not to look right at him when there's nothing but blankness around us in the dream. And he's so nice. This is surreal. I'd wanted to talk to him for so long, wanted answers, but I'd been angry too. I know it isn't his fault. It never had been. Old Man Winter is the one that deserves all my rage, but there's a part of me that still expects Manny to be the one to fix it. Fix everything.

Fix me.

“Now, I rather think you need my help with this dying business.” Dying, but not dead? I should be drowning right now, passed out in the water. I don't feel any of it, here in the dream, and I'm wearing the clothes North and Bunny made for me. Even the cape Old Man Winter forced me to take off. I run my fingers along the fabric and tuck it around me, the runes shimmer.

I might already be dead by now, or so close to it... What's the point? I really want to believe he can help, but I'm pretty screwed.

“There's always hope, Jack. You can stop him.” He's so sincere. I have to look away and end up staring at his ridiculous red bow tie.

“It's not like I haven't tried. But I can't now. I promised, for Jamie.”

“Oh Jack,” he places a gentle hand on my arm. “So ready to make sacrifices for others, but never for yourself.”

I'm… not really sure what to say to that. Isn't that what Guardians do? I glance up and Manny's eyes lock with mine.

“What if it were Jamie who could save the other children by dying-”

“The kids are different!” 

“Or perhaps Sanderson?” He offers. “Toothiana? Bunnymund?” My stomach twists at the thought.

“That's not… It isn't the same thing.” 

“It isn't?”

“They're important.”

“Important? And you are not?” His eyebrows arch high on his forehead. “You are a Guardian as well. You too took the oath.”

But I haven't even been a Guardian for a year. That's nothing. The others have been together for centuries. Wonder, Dreams, Memory, Hope… what's a bit of fun compared to all that? They don't need me. 

“You are as valuable as any of the others, human or spirit,” he insists, and maybe he really thinks that, but Jamie's worth more. I know Manny's supposed to know everything about Guardians, but he's wrong. I mean, he totally missed the Old Man Winter thing, so he's not perfect. And this? 

I have to do this.

He shakes his head sadly and I remember that he can hear my thoughts.

“Are you aware that magic has rules?” Manny shifts, but he line of his suit doesn't wrinkle, flawless in the light of this odd shadowless dreamscape. He's got his hands on his knees and he leans in close. 

“Sort of.” I knew what I'd pieced together from hearing the others talk. 

“It does,” he nods slightly. “It's not quite as mysterious as some make it out to be once you have the basics, however, there are key elements to any magical working.”

“You mean, believers?”

“That's certainly part of it.”

“But, believers are everything, right? For a Guardian?” I ask and he straightens, giving me a curious look. What?

“How many believers do you think the others had when they first fought Pitch on Earth?”

“Uh-” Is this a trick question? “Not many?”

“Not a one!” He thrusts a finger at me. “Believers are not the key, Jack. _Belief_ is.”

“There's a difference?”

“Oh my, yes.” Rocking back on his seat, he gazes into the soft light. “Back then, they had only their own belief, their own strength to sustain them. Why Katherine even rescued Nicholas St. North and Ombric on one occasion with the fierceness of her belief alone. They used belief and the core of themselves to bring forth the magic and fight.” 

Really? Bunny had told me a little about it, but mostly he'd been waiting until the Guardians got together again to give me a full history lesson. Only we'd gotten sidetracked by my powers… I guess it makes sense. They wouldn't have had any believers before they became spirits and somehow they'd still had magic. 

“Wait, weren't there relics or something?” Manny waves a hand dismissively.

“The relics are no longer important, Jack, especially now that things have changed. Shifted, if you will. The belief of the children of this world is channelled into their protectors, giving them greater power as Guardians. It made them both stronger and weaker, though I think, on balance, it's been worth the risk.”

“Yeah, well. I don't have as many believers as the others.” The new kids at Jamie's school are a drop in the bucket compared to the children who believe in the rest of the Guardians. “I'm not as powerful or important.”

“Jack. We are all equally important. And I think you still misunderstand. All the believers in the world will make no difference if your do not Believe in Yourself.” Manny looks deeply at me then. That's the only way I can describe it, like he's searching through my soul.

“I- You think-” 

“You were willing to give up your life for Jamie without a fight.” 

“That's different! I had to.” Does he think that I want to die?

“Did you?” he asks. Of course I did! What else was I going to do, let him freeze Jamie to death? Manny sighs, the lines in his forehead pinching together. “You know, I never really knew my parents. They sacrificed themselves for me when I was a child.”

The calm statement seems to dim the light around us. Aster keeps saying I should learn about the Golden Age, but we never got to it, just like the history of the Guardians. Up until now, I'd only known that Manny lived on the moon, had been stuck there for ages, and was visited by the Guardians just the once, when Pitch attacked and they were forced to follow. No one had ever explained how he got there in the first place. 

“We were followed here by Pitch Black and his Nightmare Galleon. I was his particular target. A potential darkling prince. It was a vicious battle by all accounts, but I don't remember it, having been only a babe at the time. My parents were the ones that fought him, giving their lives to protect me and this planet.”

“They were heroes.”

“Yes, but-” 

“I know I'm not really a hero.” I get it. But I can still do one more good thing.

“I disagree most vehemently, but that is another matter entirely. We are speaking of sacrifice. My parents never knelt before Pitch. Did you try to fight, Jack? Did you do everything in your power before giving up and accepting this dark fate of yours?”

Well, I… there wasn't… “He had Jamie!”

“And you had friends, fellow Guardians. You didn't have to face him alone.” But there wasn't time… was there? I mean, he probably wouldn't have hurt Jamie until I got there, but the others were busy with the blizzard... Old Man Winter's blizzard. Keeping us apart. On purpose? 

Fuck. I knew it was a trap and I still did just what he wanted. I'm so stupid. I mess everything up. 

“That's not true. Your friends fight even now against him, believing in your worth. The children believe in you and the Guardians welcome you as family.”

Family? Maybe. Bunny and me… No. Even if I could have done things differently, I can't change it now.

“You know I have to do this.” I'm doing it right now. It's only a matter of time before the dream cuts off, when Old Man Winter takes what he wants. “If I don't, he'll never stop.” 

“Never stop what? Being a threat? Spreading darkness? Will he not continue regardless of your fate?” The question hang in the air for a moment, letting me imagine just what the old man'll be capable of in a youthful new aspect. “Life is dangerous, Jack. There is always darkness and that is why we exist, why we act as protectors, but you cannot do anything if you let him convince you to lie down and die.”

“But I can't-” I start, not entirely sure of my words. Manny shushes me.

“Old Man Winter has used his influence to chip away at you and make you feel less than you truly are. You are more than what he has done to you, Jackson Overland.”

Hearing my human name makes my chest ache.

“You would not accept it for anyone else. Why then for yourself?”

“I- I don't have anything left to fight with.” Manny beams at me.

“Because you've lost your staff and elemental powers?”

“Yeah.”

“And those of us without such things are indeed so very useless.”

“Wait, I didn't mean-” He chuckles and I guess I didn't really piss him off, the glow of the room is growing brighter by the second.

“The staff doesn't matter. Believe, Jack. Belief is the key.”

“But I was never even supposed to be a Guardian!”

“Is that what you think?” His warm hands reach out for mine. I nod. “Your heart has always been joyful and true. The reflection of a moonbeam that infuses you only serves to illuminate what was already there. Fun and joy, without such things, what does anyone have to Hope for? To Dream about? Memories of past joys can carry one through many trials and who would seek Wonder if not to delight in the discovery?”

“Do you really think I'm a good Guardian?” I ask, a little afraid to hear what he might say.

“I would never have chosen you if I did not think you would rise to the occasion. The most important thing is that you believe in yourself. Believe in the magic. Believe in your purpose. Pitch underestimated you. Is it so hard to imagine that Old Man Winter has done the same? Convinced you to do the same?”

He's so warm and understanding and it makes me want to curl up and have a good cry while he's here to lean on. Maybe that's why the others trusted in him so much before and why North's faith in Manny is unshakeable even now.

“And you,” I swallow down my anxiousness, “you believe in me?”

“I've always believed in you, Jack.” 

“How?” The question bursts out of me. “I mess things up constantly.” 

“And yet, you always put things to right in the end.”

“I didn't check the ice.”

“You saved your sister.”

“The fairies in the lair-”

“You went back for them.”

“Easter was ruined and we almost lost all the believers!”

“And you found the last and bolstered his belief.”

“Pitch?” I offer half-heartedly, already knowing what he's going to say.

“Pitch was defeated by you and the magic of your centre.” It's true. I know it is. But this, whatever the hell Old Man Winter put inside me, the things I did because of him...

Manny carefully puts an arm around my shoulders. 

“Old Man Winter took advantage of you, Jack, which was not your fault, and you still escaped to warn the others.”

I did, didn't I? I fought off his control and I got out. Using Bunny tunnels, but still. And he's the one that messed with my powers. I didn't do any of that. How I was feeling and thinking, what Aster's chocolate disrupted and then North's potion purged? Maybe… maybe Manny's right.

“You may have been Jackson Overland, but you are also Jack Frost. You and you alone. The children you watch over? They believe in you. They believe in Jack Frost. Not Old Man Winter. Jack Frost.”

Jack Frost. 

Me.

“I believe, I believe, I believe,” echoes softly through the dream. It's sounds like a girl's voice.

“Did you hear that?” It whispers by again, this time sounding more like Jamie, and it resonates with something in me. Something good. “I believe, I believe, I believe.”

Manny lights up and the room brightens again too.

“Yes, Jack. Exactly so! Believe, not only in magic, but in _yourself_.” 

Just like that? Believe? I guess it's worth a shot, and as soon as I think it, everything feels lighter.

I believe. 

… that I can do this...

I Believe. 

… that I'm not going down without a fight.

**I Believe.**

And everything goes dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Solstice everyone!


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long delay. I'm trying to get ahead so that last few chapters come pretty quickly.

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

One second I'm with Manny and the next I'm back underneath the water, drowning. 

The hell with this.

I grasp Old Man Winter's hands and kick my legs furiously. I don't know how I manage it, maybe because I can feel the faint pull of the moon above, but somehow I fling myself up out of the water and send us both crashing back onto the ice.

Old Man Winter curses at me in a language I don't understand but his tone is pretty clear. He's pissed.

“You gave me your word. You're mine.”

“Guess I am just like you then – a complete fucking liar!” Water freezes and crackles off my skin, the heavy silver buckle of my belt scraping against the ice before I get my knees underneath me and scramble away. I'm not dying here. My shirt gapes open when I whip around to face Old Man Winter, crouching low on the balls of my feet, ready to move if he comes after me.

But he doesn't follow. He just watches me in the dim light. Then he takes in a breath and sighs it out, moisture crystalizing in the air.

“My boy-”

“I'm not your boy! Don't give me anymore bullshit about helping me. You tried to kill me!” I dig my toes into the surface of the lake. Wind's gone. It's eerie and still. I'll never make it to my cloak, but the staff…

“If this is how you want it, Jackson, go ahead,” he nods gravely towards the staff and slowly begins rising to his feet, more graceful than any old man should be. “Take it. Your borrowed weapon won't help you.”

Maybe it's a trap, but I'm taking the chance anyway. I dash forward and scoop it up, skidding to the shoreline. It still feels light. Not sure if it'll be enough, but I have to try. Everyone else is still protecting the school. They can't help me now and Manny can't either, not with only a tiny sliver of the moon showing between the drifting clouds. He did what he could with the dream.

It's up to me. At least now I know what I need to do.

I believe. 

“It's time for this to end, Jackson Overland.” 

“Jack Frost,” I snap at him. “I'm Jack Frost now. I don't care if you named me or not, that's who I am.”

I believe.

“No,” Old Man Winter steps closer, “that's who I'll be, once this is done.”

He's wrong. He is. I tighten my grip and brace myself. Belief. Belief is the key. And when I focus on that?

 _Jack Frost?_ I remember Jamie's awed voice the first time he'd seen me. _Jack Frost!_

My Name. Mine. And Old Man Winter reaches out, ready to steal that from me too. I swing the staff forward to point at his smug fucking face and dredge up ever last drop of happy magic that I've got. Please let this work. 

**I Believe.**

“I'm Jack Frost!” Thrusting forward, I'm desperate for the glittery blue energy of my centre to do... something. It doesn't. Instead, the staff goes white.

Frost?

White, grey, blue… I nearly drop it in shock as the shaft blooms with hoarfrost and a thousand shades of winter race down its length, ice sliding between my fingers and along my palms, crackling at the tip of the wood and curling into a familiar shape at the end. 

It- it looks like my crook.

The moment hangs in time, both of us awestruck by the glittering staff. 

“That's... not possible. How...” Old Man Winter's voice breaks the silence. His hand hesitates, but I don't.

I don't have anything to say to him. Not anymore. So I do what I should have been doing all along. I fight. For myself this time, because I'm important too. 

I'm Jack Frost and people believe in me. I believe in me.

And so will Old Man Winter once I'm done with him. 

The staff hums in my hands and unleashes a flurry of ice and sleet. Old Man Winter moves now. Yeah, he'd better run from me. This is my lake. My place. No one knows it like I do. He deflects and returns fire, but I leap across the ice using boulders and trees, rebounding faster than he can follow. I feel lit up inside.

“You're too slow, old man!”

“Brat!” He strikes back again, just missing. It isn't like when we were practicing at the palace. Old Man Winter is slower to dissipate my magic, my snow practically glowing in comparison to the dark, heavy ice that he wields. 

My magic, my crook... I'm actually doing this! Bunny is going to be furious when I get back, but it'll be worth it to show him. I can't wait.

Then Old Man Winter lands his first hit. It sends me crashing onto the ice and knocks the breath out of me completely. Damn. I think he cracked my ribs again. 

Out of the corner of my eye, the shadows move.

Crap. I leap up, narrowly evading the next strike. And the next. He's relentless now. I try and use the shadows too but he follows. How does he know where I'm going to be? I just need a moment to-

He connects a second time and I'm thrown into a boulder. 

Ow. Trying to shake it off, Old Man Winter is there in a whirl, a hand gripping my staff. Kicking at him, I hold on with both hands and the shaft glows violently, making him flinch.

“Get off!”

“Do you really think what little light you have will defeat me?” he growls. “I've been building this power for centuries and now that I have the rest back as well? You can run and snipe at me all you wish, my boy. I can always find you. Your fate is inevitable.”

“I'm not your anything!” The light brightens, on my staff and in my skin, shimmering with magic. 

Old Man Winter grumbles, but doesn't let go, dark lines pulsing along the skin of his hand where he touches my crook. His coat, his pants, everything is… wet? Sodden with an oozing black ugliness that's seeping out of his pores and covering him protectively. A few drops land on my staff and hiss angrily.

“Such a waste. I'll only find another. Enjoy your small victory, Jack. You've lost everything else.”

More lies. I'm not listening to it. He's not getting to me like that again. I press whatever energy I have into the crook, hoping it'll be enough.

“All alone. Again. No one can help you now. Even if one of your precious Guardians managed to get through, none of them have the power to topple me, and the light from your friend above is too weak.” Damn it. The darkness swirls around Old Man Winter, his eyes cold and without mercy. I can't dislodge him. Come on! There has to be something I can do.

“But he can still watch. I'll drown you in your lake where he can't reach and then I'll do the same to any of your friends that try and stop me.”

“No!” I cry and shove at him, banging my knuckles against the hardened yuck protecting his chest.

Old Man Winter grimaces and his dark power reaches out, like creepy smoke, twining along the length of my crook and trying to choke the light. Holding on as tightly as I can, the staff starts to shake between us like a bottle with a cork ready to pop. And then it does, bright white light erupting from the end, shooting into the sky like a beacon, unable to fight against the full force of Old Man Winter's dark magic and doing fuck all to get him off me. 

“You should have kept your word, my boy.”

 

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

Evil ratbag son of a- The heavy snow muffles my cursing. I can't get a tunnel to open up at the lake. This is as close as I can get, outside the town limits, without even moonlight to go by. 

Spiteful demon witch.

Nothing's been plowed and the choccy is starting to wear off, so I can't run as fast as I'd like. Exhaustion's creeping in too. Best not to think about it. Just get moving. If I'm lucky, whatever's blocking my tunnels won't keep me from physically passing through it.

I hope Jackie's all right, but I'm dreading the worst. If he gave himself up for Jamie… The possibilities are awful to consider. I don't think I can fight the old man if he's wearing Jackie's body. 

No. I close my fists painfully and focus on the sensation. I have to believe that it won't come to that. Jack'll survive long enough for me to get there. He has to.

The wind has calmed down. Peering up and hoping for more light, the clouds part a bit. Maybe I can-

“Ah!” A blazing spire lights up the sky to the west for the space of a heartbeat. What the hell was that? Didn't look like any human made spotlight I've ever seen. Some kind of magic, maybe. 

Half a tic later, another brilliant streak crosses the sky, this time arcing towards where the first spire had come from. It reminds me of – could it be? The light curves towards the ground, lighting up the tree line where it touches down.

“Nightlight?” 

“Bunnymund!” I spin in surprise at the familiar cry. “Oh Bunnymund, are you all right?”

And there she is, slogging through the snow, just the same as I last saw her. Katherine. She hasn't aged a day, clad in the thick coat and trousers she always did prefer while traveling, long hair wound up on top of her head.

“Was that Nightlight just now?” I gesture up at the sky with a couple limbs and catch her with the others as she stumbles to my side.

“Oh dear, look at you!” She fusses worriedly over my wounds. “We came to help the town but we couldn't get any closer. There's a barrier in the way. Doesn't this hurt?” 

“No time for that,” I gently set her back. The clouds have finally parted and I know where I'm going now. “We've got to get to the lake.” 

“But-” she starts as I pull her into motion.

“Bunnymund,” a deep voice greets me, the hulking man it belongs to appearing out of the night in a rime stiffened military coat, swords at his side gleaming. Well, damn. He still towers over me, even like this.

“General.” Strewth, where the hell had he been then? But I can't stop for stories. I need to get to Jack. Not that the General has any trouble with the drifting snow in spite of his size. The Snow Queen is with us too, her upset chatter about General Winter making more sense now. She's pulled Katherine up to walk on top of the snow, the way winter spirits never seem to have any trouble doing, and somehow the drifts beneath me pull together enough to support my weight as well.

“I thought Burgess was under siege.”

“It's sorted. Mother Nature dissipated the blizzard,” I explain and Katherine's eyes go wide. She and Emily Jane had come to some kind of tentative friendship before she'd vanished, hadn't they? “Town's fine, but Jackie's missing. He's likely at his lake facing down Old Man Winter. I'd be there already but for whatever this is, blocking my tunnels.” 

General Winter mutters darkly in Russian and it's only thanks to years of North's multilingual ranting that I catch even half of angry words.

“Oh no,” the Snow Queen says, hand on her mouth. “He's alone?”

“That light that shot into the sky? Do you think that was Jack Frost?” Katherine pipes up. “Nightlight went to find out what it was. If Old Man Winter is there, he's going to be furious.” 

“What? Why?” I ask, but whatever the reason for Nightlight's grudge against the old man, I hope he finds them. Jackie's going to need all the help he can get.

“Well,” Katherine's face is crossed by a rare scowl, “I gather we've been gone quite a long time...” But she doesn't get any further with that, because we smack up against an invisible wall.

“This is not made by Winter,” the General intones. No shit. Must have snapped into place sometime after Old Man Winter got his hands on Jack. He didn't want anything interrupting him this time. The clouds, the almost New Moon… Nightlight'll be a nasty surprise then. I hope he shoves that moonbeam up the old man's arse.

“Mmm,” Katherine pulls off her glove and runs a hand over it. “If Nightlight didn't have any trouble breaching it, it's likely some kind of dark magic. He'd have sliced straight through.”

“How do we break through the ruddy thing then?” I thud a fist against it. It's like hitting solid stone and we've no convenient moonbeam to pierce through.

“I need light to work with,” she peers at where the moon should be, the small slice of it made even weaker by the drifting cloud cover. Ombric had taught her well, but even Katherine couldn't work with nothing, not to mention that light was still more Nightlight's talent, even after he'd become mortal. 

Well, there's still one light that will outshine even a moonbeam.

“Light from the Warren might do.” Better than moonlight, since the first Light made its home there now. It was why Pitch couldn't wreak havoc there like he had at The Workshop and Punjam Hy Loo. 

Aw hell. That's why the old man couldn't get to Jackie there, isn't it? Too much Light. The Warren and I had been suffused by it for years. By using the anchor in Jackie and his staff, his magic was hidden, but exposure to the Light kept it at bay. If Pitch hadn't broken Jack's staff and given Old Man Winter an in, would the Light have eventually eroded the darkness away entirely? 

But he did and the old man had tainted everything. Every time Jack had come back to the Warren we'd fought and it'd hurt something fierce. We'd gotten so close and to have it twist around like that... Not Jackie's fault though, not all of it. Magic in the staff had been influencing him. Crikey, that day in kiln room when Jack had finally put the thing down...

Bah. I shake my head. I've no time for this. I have to open a portal. I'll need more focus than my usual thump provides though. The power of the barrier radiates outward and opening a tunnel this close is no easy thing. Crouching down, I dig through the snow, the cold ground cover quickly giving way once the Snow Queen kneels beside me to help. With my palms against the hardened soil, I manage a small opening into the heart of the Warren, allowing a shaft of light to escape.

“Perfect.' Katherine opens the bag hanging at her side. After a moment of digging she produces a mirror and proceeds to use it to direct the light like a blade, slicing a hole into the barrier. The edges curl away as if burnt.

“I can't dissipate the entirety of it, but that should get us through.” 

Hold on, Jackie. We're coming.

 

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Right after the light shoots out of my staff, another brighter flash strikes the ground a few feet away. Oh no. Did I hit something? I could have hurt-

Ah! Old Man Winter wrenches me up as he turns to face whatever it is, still not letting go of my crook. Asshole. 

The man who crash landed stands. He's slim and his short hair curls forward in a neat looking swoop and he… well, he kind of looks like me. Not exactly, but maybe if I'd ever had an older brother. He even has a wooden staff in his hand, the end of it lighting up the whole lake. 

“You!” Old Man Winter rages. He looks creepy as hell now that I can see him properly, filthy instead of mysteriously dark, wrinkles cutting into his face and pulling his mouth into a bitter scowl. 

The man nods and levels his crystal tipped weapon at Old Man Winter threateningly. Guess he's not much for banter. The old man glances at me, eyes like daggers, and then the darkness recedes back into him and off my crook. Wait, is he-

Oh crap! I don't quite manage to get my feet under me and the impact stings when I hit a tree, falling into the snow at its roots. At least he let go of my staff. 

My crook. I don't know how it happened, Belief maybe, but it's familiar in my hands. The same whorls and twists that had marked my father's crook are etched into the ice covering what used to be Bunny's staff. I catch my breath while I'm being ignored, my ribs aching. Well, whoever this guy is, Old Man Winter seems to think he's the bigger threat.

I should help him.

No, wait. I should go get the others, shouldn't I?

Maybe he doesn't need me? He reminds me of the light boy, Nightlight, but he's too… I don't know. Old? Human? It's not holding him back any, though, they way he lunges forward. It's painful to watch them collide, dark and light hurting my eyes. Ugh. Okay, find the others. 

I get up and move, but once I'm a few steps from the shoreline a sharp pull in my chest sends me to my knees. Fuck. The connection. Of course he's not going to let me leave.

Right. Back to kick some ass then. 

I turn away from the trees to the lake...

“Oh no.” How did it happen so fast? 

The lake looks awful. Tainted. Even the hole where Old Man Winter tried to drown me is sealed with smoky ice. Ugly shadows spill across the surface and dim the blasts of light, soaking up power. Snow is falling again too, dirty and grey, building up around the edges of the lake. I should have gone for my cape. It's buried somewhere now. 

With a grunt, the glowing man slides back following a nasty hit, glancing upward as he stops. 

“You'll get no help from above, Nightlight.” 

It is him. 

Old Man Winter strikes again but Nightlight leaps aside. What can I do? The ground trembles with the force of their attacks, shaking thick clumps of snow from the branches overhead. Up. Yeah. I grab onto the nearest tree and swing myself into the branches. Everyone forgets to look up.

“Even freed, you're too late. I have what I need now.” Nightlight still doesn't speak. I can't remember what Aster had said. Can he talk?

I edge out on a thick branch over the ice, tying up my shirt laces to keep them from tangling. Old Man Winter is completely focused on Nightlight, who narrows his eyes and readies himself for another attack. Here goes nothing. I fling myself at Old Man Winter's back and hit hard, slamming my ice onto him and rebounding to the shoreline. 

He doesn't even flinch. The ice slides off in chunks, tarnished from the darkness of his armour.

“I'll be with you in a moment, my boy.” I fucking hate him. 

Nightlight's eyes meet mine for a moment and then he moves to strike again. The black armour is too thick to get through. Nightlight's blows score marks against it, but don't penetrate entirely, and the yuck oozes itself back into shape. Watching him parry and thrust, he's so quick, I'm just going to get in the way. The crystal at the end of his staff is flickering and shimmering too, lightning fast, and – is that a moonbeam?

Old Man Winter had complained about moonbeams and Manny… It gives me an idea. 

I dip into the trees as far as I can bear and come around to where Nightlight lands after their next clash, Old Man Winter thrown to the other side of the lake. He's bright and fierce and breathing hard while the old man is calmly rising, and he flinches when I stumble forward to touch his arm. 

“Let me help? We can work together.” I hold up my staff and his eyebrows raise. 

“Bunnymund?” Oh. He does talk. How can he tell it's Bunny's with all the ice? The light in the crystal bucks and flashes, and it- it's saying something? I watch the flashing more closely.

_Yes! Help. Together!_

Nightlight looks at me searchingly. _Do you speak moonbeam?_

Huh. Apparently I do.

“Stop!” Old Man Winter is bearing down on us, his face contorted with anger. 

“Come on.” I push our staffs together and motion for him to grasp them with me. 

“Get away from him.” The command rings loudly over the lake and Old Man Winter thrusts out a hand, sending a wave of shadowy sleet directly at us.

Just in time, I move with Nightlight, bringing the two staffs upright like a shield. The sleet connects and splatters harmlessly against the bright magic, turning white as the magical corruption hisses away into the air. 

Yes!

There are no words then, just strikes and blocks, attacks and parries, as we work in synch and slowly chip away at him. Every muscle I never knew I had begins to ache and my ribs scream. Again, again, again… Nightlight leads, way more experienced with this sort of thing than me, but he never takes complete control. Together. Always together. The three of us – Nightlight, the moonbeam, and me.

Old Man Winter tries to hold his ground, but he's careful to stay out of reach too. He's worried and he lashes out, trying to strike low, aiming to unbalance us and break us apart. 

Yeah, I don't think so.

We leap and swing down from above, the light from our attack scoring the ice. He gets singed but manages to evade us, retreating to the shoreline.

We advance, sliding on the ice. Old Man Winter attacks again. 

No more dodging. We brace and block, standing firm against his blow. Wildly, he throws ice and magic, trying to force us back, but we're closer now. A little more. More. Brace and strike...

Yes! We clip his shoulder and he falters, dropping to one knee. 

That's when Nightlight's eyes connect with mine. 

_Now._

Right. We can do this. 

“I Believe. I Believe. I Believe.” Nightlight grins at me.

 _I Believe. I Believe. I Believe._ The words in Moonbeam resound in my head.

We drop our guard to aim and the light that bursts forth from the crystal is intense. Both weapons glow, trembling with the force, and our hands… wow. It's not just the staff. It's us, too. Glowing. 

The beam hits him in the chest and he gasps into the night as the darkness, his armour, even the shadows on the ice, flake and scatter like leaves. The light reflects off the frozen landscape, finding even the smallest shadows and chasing them down.

When it fades away it leaves the area dim and still. Old Man Winter is on his knees at the centre of the lake, shoulders slumped inward. I'd collapse too if I didn't have Nightlight to lean on, sucked dry from whatever the hell magic we just pulled off. He's pressed against my side, shivering, just as wrung out, and his crystal tipped staff has gone dark. The moonbeam is gone. I hope it's okay. At least, we destroyed the dark magic. 

We won, didn't we?

Without warning, the ice cracks like a gunshot, shattering the quiet.

“You… you can still drown.” The creak in his voice is back and I don't know if he means Nightlight or me, but I'm not sure that it matters. Blasting away the dark magic hasn't taken all of Old Man Winter's power.

The ice buckles and parts underneath our feet. I'm really done with drowning, but fuck, we're not close enough to the shore. I'm going to have to-

“Boreas.” Out of nowhere, a deep voice sends a chill down my spine and makes Old Man Winter flinch. I can't see anyone, but the temperature plummets, saving me the trouble of trying to freeze the ice and probably passing out in the process. “We have much to settle, yes?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooop, almost forgot: Starry_Night made a comment waaaaay back on Chapter 15 that I kind of ignored. If you're still reading, you made an excellent point :) Thanks for the comment!


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm slow (sorry) and this chapter is getting long so... here's the first third - Jack's POV.

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

Whoa. The temperature plummets and I think the water just froze right down to the lake bed because the spirit that steps onto the ice is massive and surface doesn't give at all. The threatening creak of the nearest trees masks the sound of his thick soled boots on the ice, steps firm and sure, hoarfrost trailing behind him as he closes in on Old Man Winter. 

“They have stripped you of your unnatural magic. You have no foulness behind which to hide any longer.” We did do it! It took everything we had but we did. The triumph boosts me a little until I realize how violently Nightlight is shivering. He's probably not used to cold like this and it's only going to get worse if the way this guy looms over Old Man Winter is any indication. At least there's more light now, wherever it's coming from.

“The power of Winter is mine!” Old Man Winter struggles to find his footing, hunched over like he was when we first met, his purple coat garish against the white of the landscape. 

The other spirit though? He looks right at home. He reminds me of North, white chinned and outfitted in red and black. He's even got swords. Only, North looks about a thousand times more friendly than this spirit, with his trimmed beard and military-style... 

“You usurped that power from where it should have rightfully flowed, little wind, when you forced yourself into the role of Old Man Winter.” The accusing words resonate in the cold, thrumming with power, and Old Man Winter looks smaller and smaller. 

Wait. Is this General Winter? It has to be. How did he get here? Wasn't he missing? Not that I'm complaining. I might not have been able to freeze the ice before we went through. If we'd been dumped in the lake, I could have pulled myself out, especially with the old man being too weak to hold me under, but Nightlight too? If he's mortal?

Then my brain catches up with the General's words. 

Forced himself to be Old Man Winter?

“You were very fortunate to accomplish what you did, using Marzanna as an ally and compelling the Queen to assist you, but I am free now, Boreas. You will not catch me unawares again. And now that the foulness that you collected has been vanquished...”

Nightlight nudges me and I turn to see figures hovering at the edge of the lake. The Snow Queen with a woman I don't know and… Aster. Oh my God. What the hell happened? Bunny nods at me, and maybe he's trying to be reassuring, but that's a lot of blood in his fur. I'd be over there in a heartbeat if I didn't think I'd end up sprawled on the ice after a couple steps. 

“No!” 

The cry from Old Man Winter is sharp, jolting us enough that we snap our staffs back in his direction even as we're swaying on our feet. But Old Man Winter is grey and weak on the ice. No threat at all. Swords still sheathed, General Winter stands over him doing… something. 

“You can relax, Jack.” My hands spasm around my crook at the Snow Queen's voice. How did she get over here so fast? “General Winter will deal with him now.”

“What is he going to do?” She smiles sadly at my question, though she seems better, all blue and sparkly.

“Boreas was never supposed to take on the power of Winter. Everything he has was stolen from others. Old Man Winter was one of the General's aspects before Boreas usurped it.”

Boreas stole the power of Winter, enough to control other older Winter spirits?

“But he complained about being old.”

“It was the only way for him to claim and channel the power, becoming established in the aspect of Old Man Winter. Then he created you, a stronger, separate avatar, a true winter myth that General Winter wouldn't have a connection to. And it worked. The power that he placed in the staff for safekeeping, in case he lost his control of it when he was working your shift, accepted you as its master far more readily than it had him.”

How many spirits did he kill or absorb or whatever it is he did? How many others were injured or killed by his actions… Fuck. Blinking away tears, I wish I had the energy to hate him, but it's taking everything I have not to shake into pieces. At least Nightlight has stopped shivering, covered now in a thick cloak that must have come from the Snow Queen.

“Murderer,” Boreas snarls pathetically. “W- where's your mercy now, General?”

“You have had your chances.” Boreas' form is flickering where he kneels on the ice. General Winter is taking him apart. Literally. I think I'm going to be sick. “You have brought this end on yourself. Even if I wished it, I could not return you to what you were. You split yourself from the core of your nature in your foolish grasp for power.” 

The Wind. Boreas separated himself from the Wind so he could become a more powerful winter spirit and now he's screwed. He deserves everything he gets, he does - but slowly watching him flicker and fade, taking terrified gasps as his fingers twitch desperately on the ice... it still hurts. And I don't think it's just the anchor.

A warm hand curls around my shoulder.

“Ya don't have ta watch, ya know.” Aster. Forcing my eyes away from what's happening, Aster does that hug thing with all his arms and I bury my face in his ruff before anyone can see me tearing up over fucking Boreas. 

Damn it. 

“S'all right, Jackie. You're safe. Ya did good.” And with that reassurance the last of my adrenaline bails and I sag against him. Bunny pulls us back a few feet in an awkward stumble that- oh. Solid ground. This is better, even if Bunny does smell like ice and blood, his heartbeat is strong and happiness radiates from him. Tucking my head underneath his chin, he gives me what has to be the most thorough hug ever. 

“Wasn't just me.” I might not even have tried if not for Manny. “Nightlight-”

“Your idea,” the silvery haired man interrupts me wearily, leaning against the other woman who arrived with Bunny. 

The moonbeam? I try. He doesn't seem too worried about his unlit crystal.

Freed, I think. They're very hard to destroy. 

“Where the hell have you two been, anyway?” Aster grumbles. 

“Oh, well,” I lift my head to get a better look at the woman who speaks. She could be the same age as Nightlight, but if she's a spirit appearances aren't much to go on. “That's quite a story...” 

“Katherine...” Bunny says her name with a half-hearted warning in his voice. She must talk a lot. Nightlight and Katherine. Oh, North is going to go through the roof when he finds out he missed this. I wonder if that wizard is around here somewhere too? 

“It will keep for now. I'll simply say that either we had terrible timing, or Boreas had excellent planning, and we were entrapped with General Winter.” 

“I believe it was his intention,” intones the General in a disturbingly flat voice. I pull away enough to see the unblemished surface of the lake, which Aster takes as a cue to let go unfortunately, leaving just one arm around my shoulders as a support. There's nothing left of Boreas now. Not even a mark on the ice. 

What does that mean for me?

The General moves to meet us, reaching out, and every hair on my head stands on end. Holy shit, he's terrifying. He's a good guy? Winter spirits are confusing as fuck. 

In a blur of grey, Bunny's hand snaps out and catches the General by the wrist before his fingers touch me. Crackling frost races up Aster's fur.

“What are ya doin'?” My breath catches in my throat. I can see the outline of Bunny's tense muscles as easily as I can hear the dark challenge in his voice. My fingers twist around my staff, as ready as my exhausted body can manage. 

“He is tainted.” 

“He's a Guardian.” A warning. 

“That is a magic I will respect, but we must know.” Aster's chest reverberates with a wary grumble. The still air is cold, branches still crackling overhead, and yet I can feel the dirt shift beneath my feet. I glance down and see the stark contrast - hoarfrost spiking up from the ice colliding with a barrier of brown and green tendrils of life at the shoreline. 

Not Spring my ass, Bunny.

“Jack?” Vivid green eyes glow in the pale light, staring at me piercingly. 

Is he asking me? 

General Winter calmly waits, neither giving in or resisting Aster's hold. I don't know. Should I? How else am I going to know if I'm… if it's still there? North and Aster couldn't tell before. Not completely. But the way Bunny stopped the General when he reached out? And I thought he liked him...

Fuck it. If I do it now, at least Bunny's here in case General Winter tries something.

I lean into him, clutching my staff between us, and Aster's rigid form curls to bring me closer again. Closer is better, right? Okay. I suck in a breath and brace myself. It'll be fine. It can't be worse than what the Old Man did, can it?

“He can check.”

Bunny nods and allows General Winter's cold hand to clasp my neck without releasing his wrist. The sound that comes out of me is… not good. God. His fingers are like a brand on my skin, hot and cold, a thousand pinpricks of shock. Instinctively, I press against Bunny, clenching my jaw. Cold. I'm so cold...

“General-” Aster warns, but General Winter is already lifting his hand, the pain easing. 

“Nothing remains. There is no hold over you now. Nor the Wind, I expect, which will have to find its own way.” It's really gone. I'm so ridiculously grateful for the reassurance that the tears I'd held back over Boreas finally spill over. I'm free.

“Thanks,” I manage weakly. The General steps back, an arms length away, and nods respectfully at Aster who returns the gesture. It takes me a moment, but I still need to know where I stand before he leaves, so I get my shit together and face him again, steadying myself with my crook. “Can you tell me about my powers? Old Man Winter said-”

“Oh, if the children believe you have them, you must. Guardian powers, technically, not Winter ones,” Katherine interrupts and looks expectantly at General Winter. Can the belief of a handful of kids really do that?

“It is true. They are yours and cannot be taken from you. You are entwined with Guardian magic and are no longer within the realm of my influence.” 

“So, I'm not a winter spirit?” It comes out more hopeful than I mean it to. Great. Insult the one winter spirit who's actually helped you. Idiot.

“No, and yes. A winter aspect, but not a true elemental power, though that may change in time, as all things do. For now, you are unique, Jack Frost,” he pauses as the air finally stirs with a slight breeze. “If the Wind has been listening to you, however, your assistance in guiding it would be most helpful now that it is untethered.”

Huh. Without Old Man Winter coercing the Wind, maybe it will listen to me more. I can at least try. If it's a spirit on its own we might even get to be friends.

“I'll do my best.” General Winter gives me a solemn nod and the Snow Queen smiles. I'd totally forgotten that she was even there. She looks so much better, all bright and glittery and elegant. She's free too.

“We must go. Winter has been badly unbalanced and too many spirits have strayed or been harmed. Bunnymund.” 

“General.” 

“Good bye, Jack.” A soft kiss presses against my cheek, surprising me, and then, in a swirl, they're gone. Aster grumbles at the flurry of snow, waving it away. 

I don't know what happened with the other allies Boreas had, but I guess the General will deal with them and whatever sprites are left. I'm done hanging out with winter spirits, though the few times the Snow Queen had been able to fight off Boreas' influence she'd been nice. Maybe someday.

Now that they've gone, Aster sighs and lets his guard down. Katherine is fussing over Nightlight, speaking quickly. Something about a goose? Tooth must still be at the school- 

“Oh my God, Jamie! He was supposed to be safe. Did anyone-”

“Calm down, Snowflake. He's in the Warren warming up with Baby Tooth. Probably raiding my chocolaterie,” Aster reassures me. Safe then. Everyone is safe.

“What about you? Are you okay?” I face him, gesturing at his bloody fur and missing limbs. Bunny must still be chocolate fueled with all the arms, even if his face looks more like I'm used to and he's not quite as tall as he was. 

“It's fine, Jackie,” he shrugs, like missing a few limbs is a minor inconvenience. 

“It's not fine! Somebody cut off your arms. It was Anna, wasn't it?” I'm going to string her up by her stupid braids.

“S'all right. I've quite a few at the moment,” he waggles his paws, two of them coming to rest on my shoulders, “and I heal pretty fast like this, though it's winding down now.” 

Even as he says it, he shivers and the alienness of his form shifts down a notch. It's really over. No more surging powers or agonizing over the dream...

“Are you all right, then?” Bunny turns it back around on me, another paw settling on my hip where the belt he made for me sits. We're okay. We won. I can feel the joy building in him now. 

“Yeah,” I shove my head under his chin so he doesn't see the stupid grin on my face and his happiness spikes. I missed this so much. There's a tiny voice that pipes up in the back of my mind, telling me that I messed up and the others should be mad, but then Bunny's pleased chuckle vibrates underneath my hands and it dies away. “I have my powers back.”

“You're the same as North now, aren't you?” A hesitant sounding Katherine says from where she's standing nearby. I can see her blushing out of the corner of my eye.

“Yeah, we've all gone that way,” Aster answers. “Me, Sandy, and Tooth. And you know what was happening with Ombric?”

Ombric. That was the wizard that became Father Time, right?

“Anyway, Jackie's shift was a bit different and he thought Old Man Winter had taken his powers. Strewth, the past year…” Aster shook his head, chin brushing over my hair. They don't even know about Pitch, do they? “It's a long story that I'm sure we'll get around to eventually. All that matters now is that Jack took the Oath and since the kiddies Believe in him, and believe in his winter powers, he's got'em.”

Katherine nods slightly, but she'd worked all that out already, hadn't she? Wish I'd known that earlier, though I might not have really believed it. 

“And apparently a crook to match, as well,” Bunny continues, glancing at my staff over his shoulder where I'm hold it against his back. 

Oh. How am I going to explain that?


	26. Chapter 26

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

“Uh, yeah. That happened,” Jackie tilts his face up and leans back, bringing his crook to rest next to us in all its icy glory. It's gorgeous. The shape is close enough to his original, but the ice curves of this one glitter with the same cheery magic that forms Jackie's 'happy flakes”. My staff is barely a shadow within it. “You don't mind?”

“Nah. Suits you.” It does, too. The ice magic looks right at home around the remains of what once held the relic, and I'm not going to get overly sentimental about it. Not like it was doing anyone any good on my wall. Though if someone else is going to be using my staff, I'm glad it's Jack. “I'm curious to know how you were able to feel the light in it. You were going on about-”

“Moonbeams. Yeah...” Jack's words drift off, fingers twiddling the crook around. “I'm not really sure how it works. When Boreas changed me, he used a moonbeam somehow, or a piece of one anyway. The Man in the Moon said it infuses me?”

A moonbeam. Well. That's something, isn't it? Explains why he senses the light in the staff… and why The Warren liked him so much. Strewth. The Light. Small wonder he'd felt at home. 

“Wait. You had a chance to chat with Tsar Lunar?” When did that happen? And how?

“Yeah. He was… nice.” Jackie's voice drops again, going soft. “It helped.” 

“Is he all right?” Nightlight asks in his rarely heard voice. Even after becoming mortal he'd been a quiet one. Force of habit maybe. He's a bit wobbly still I think, a hand on Katherine's shoulder where she's digging through her bag in search of something. I loosen my hold on Jackie and he turns to respond. 

“I think so. He said he's been watching all this time, but he couldn't do anything. I used to think-” Jack shakes his head, smiling sadly. “Anyway. It was good.”

Katherine raises a small orb with a satisfied grin and with a shake sets it glowing, lighting up the area better than the dim moonlight we'd been left with when General Winter had departed.

Jack and Nightlight both tilt a little towards the source of light. It's uncanny, the way they echo one other. Similar colouring, both graceful and lithe, their eyes the only vivid difference, Jack's icy blue to Nightlight's pale green. It's as though the Light aspects of each has made them brothers of a sort. 

“I'm glad he helped you.”

It clears up a few things, North'll be relieved. It hadn't made sense before, Manny shifting Jack or leaving him to languish alone when he could've been with us. Still, I have to wonder...

“Jackie? When did you talk to Manny if you came haring over here from the school to save Jamie?”

“I-” Jack makes a sour face, one of his hands dropping to rest on his belt. “Old Man Winter pushed me under the ice. He was going to finish what he started.”

“Jack-” A futile flare of rage sparks to life in me, despite no longer having any target to spend itself on. It's easily smothered with Jack here safe beside me.

“I think I passed out and started dreaming for a bit, but I fought back… after.” After? Aww, Snowflake. Traded himself for Jamie and expected that was that, did he? “Manny kind of kicked my ass about it.”

I quash the snort that tries to escape. Manny? Resort to violence? He was far too good at talking people into things to lower himself to that. If that first dream hadn't gotten botched up...

“Uh- you knew his parents didn't you?” Jack asks. Hmm. I'll allow the change in subject, but we need have a conversation in private about his lack of self-preservation. If I'm lucky, Manny really did knock some sense into him.

“Yeah, I did.” The Tsar and Tsarina had been allies. We'd given him the Light for a while, when war had first broken out. I'd been there to deliver it then, and to receive it back when we'd realized, almost too late, how close to defeat we were. 

The Tsarina had insisted on our delegation staying the first time and seeing to us herself, an elegant and respectful hostess. I remember admiring both her calm forthrightness and her grace. At the time, I'd had no patience for chatty humans and their messy emotions. Many of my memories blend together now, but the more unusual ones stand out where they've taken root in my head and refused to be toppled by time. I don't recall most of the ceremony we held when we handed the Tsar the Light, they were Pookan rituals I'd participated in many times, but the following afternoon some of us had taken tea with the Tsarina and that had been a unique experience. I can see now that she'd been warm as well as calm, welcoming as well as respectful. We'd even spoken directly, about art of all things.

I'd expected someone else to be sent when the alarm went up and we knew the Light needed protecting, a Pooka more senior than I'd been. But no. The urgent missive had asked for me by name. I recalled that announcement with shocking clarity too. I'd been sent fleeing while the line I'd left, the last of my kind, had fallen. 

When I arrived, the Tsar had been too preoccupied to do anything but offer the barest greetings. The Tsarina, hurried and harried, had met me, thrusting the Light into my arms with no ceremony at all. _Fly Bunnymund_ , she'd said, _as far and fast as you can, for nothing will survive him if he claims this._ Those words were burned into my memories. 

I sometimes wonder if that's when it truly began. The break, between who I had been and who I'd become. Everything that had been important, that had mattered, was gone in that instant. Only I and the Light remained. Only we continued on, both of us beginning down a long road, the destination of which could hardly have been imagined then. 

“If you get a chance to talk to Manny,” Jack began, breaking through my reverie, “I think he'd like to hear about them and what happened.”

Would he? We had never really talked, all these years, Manny and I. Not something that would have occurred to me to do really, before the shift, and he'd never asked. There would recordings and such, but that's hardly the same, is it? Nightlight could add on too, whatever he might still remember. 

“If that's okay, I mean...” I must've hesitated too long, because Jack pulls away as though he's overstepped. I catch his shoulder with my hand.

“S'all right, Snowflake. No worries. Talking about it doesn't bother me so much these days.” He sags a little, half nodding. I'd told him enough to understand before, but more events than personal details. I have some records, journal entries, from centuries ago, and Katherine had harassed a fair amount of detail out of me before… Strewth, that's going to start up again too. She'd never been satisfied by the dry way the Williams' recorded events, had she?

And we'll have to tell her about Pitch. I'm not looking forward to that conversation.

Thankfully, she seems otherwise preoccupied at the moment, gesturing at Nightlight's staff, “Where do you think it went this time?”

The crystal has gone dark. The moonbeam that had originally freed Nightlight from Pitch had made its home there, resilient to the last, even seeing Nightlight through his transition into a mortal boy after he had given Katherine the Kiss of Goodnight. It had remained by his side as he had worked to become a sorcerer, picking up light magic at a rapid pace that even Ombric had been startled by. Made sense though. He was still Nightlight, if not a nightlight. No other name had ever seemed to suit.

Nightlight smiles and shrugs, unworried.

“What about the piece inside of me? Do you think it left too?” Jackie peers at the crystal curiously and I half expect him to hop up onto his staff despite the way he still leans into it.

Nightlight shakes his head and they look at each other for a long moment. I wonder-

“Jack? Can you talk to the moonbeams too?” Katherine, still sharp as ever, beats me to the question.

“Umm, yeah,” Nightlight nods along with Jack. 

“And to each other, just now?”

“He was telling me about the moonbeam. He said it always comes back, somehow. They're friends. Maybe when it does I can ask it about my moonbeam. Nightlight doesn't think that can be separated from me now.”

“Hmm, likely not,” I agree. Magical workings like that tend to be next to impossible to undo without killing someone.

Jack stares up at the night sky, most of the clouds having drifted away, allowing a few stars to shine through. 

“Do you think any of the others will talk to me now?”

Nightlight laughs. 

“You might get more than you bargained for. Some of them can be very curious,” Katherine adds knowingly. Apparently, Jackie's going to have more than a few nighttime visitors while he's up above. Can't imagine he'll mind more friends.

“Sounds like fun.”

They look calmer, happy even, despite their exhaustion. I hate to spoil it. However...

“Listen,” I cross my arms and ask the question that needs answering before we return to the school. Boreas may be gone, but there's more than him out there. “How did you get trapped by Boreas? I'd rather not be caught unawares if anything slips past General Winter or some other uppity ratbag decides to try their hand at the same.”

Katherine worries at her lip, glancing at a frowning Nightlight.

“Well, there were reports of strange things happening to winter spirits. Chione had vanished, along with a few others, and we suspected dark magic.”

Nightlight nods solemnly. 

“Since Nightlight had met General Winter once before,” Katherine looks at me, knowing I'd been the one to introduce them, “we asked to see him, thinking that he might have some insight. He refused. I don't think he believed us. We would have come to you, but a few days later we received a message asking us to meet him in a rather out of the way part of Siberia. We thought he'd reconsidered and wanted a secure place to talk without being watched.”

“But it wasn't him that invited you.”

“No,” she sighed, bowing her head. “We were bait. They used us to draw him there, convincing General Winter that we'd been involved and had been trying to trick him.” 

“They're good at that, two-faced creeps,” Jackie scowls. That's fair enough. None of them had been what they seemed for Jack and they'd lied with every breath.

“He arrived with a few others, Marzanna and more than one Yuki Onna. We barely had time to argue before Boreas and the Snow Queen appeared and attacked. We were too preoccupied with defending ourselves to realize how they circled us. It's hard to remember exactly. It all happened so fast.”

“But they needed numbers?”

“Yes,” Nightlight nods. “The circle, once formed, was too dark to break though.” Too much for even them to dispel if Boreas used others to amplify the circle's power. Not a feat to be repeated easily. He would have sealed them into the ice then, hidden and frozen in both place and time.

“All right then, but next time, a little warning wouldn't go amiss.” None of us had known what the two had been doing. North had obsessed over their disappearance, desperately seeking out any clue and finding none. Not sure how bad it might've gotten if Ombric hadn't given him that vague reassurance of seeing them in the future. 

“Oh Bunnymund, you were all so busy. We never expected anything so dangerous.” They were sorcerers in their own right. I suppose they wouldn't have. 

Bet the winter spirits unallied with Boreas hadn't seen him coming either. I wonder if any of them survived or if he broke them apart and took their power? Chione was his daughter. Had that meant anything to him? 

“The Snow Queen freed us as soon as she was able. She also promised to help Kailash, who was very badly injured during the attack and imprisonment. She took the brunt for us, I'm afraid. She's still sealed in the ice until we can free her safely.” I can feel the hope in her words, even if it is a little shaky. Kailash and Katherine have been through almost as much as Nightlight and his moonbeam. And the Snow Queen is helping is she? Reckon we'll be seeing her more often now and, as little as I'm inclined to like her, she seems to be all right.

“I'm sorry to hear about Kailash. We'll have to see what we can do, but we've got to stick together now. It's been a crook year for us Guardians and we can't afford to be complacent.” I hold up a hand to stave off her questions. “We'll explain later. Just be more careful.”

Katherine nods at me, her bright eyes awash with eager questions. 

“Umm,” Jackie looks more than a bit confused. “I remember you mentioning Nightlight and Katherine, but-”

“Oh! Kailash is my goose.” 

“A Great Himalayan Snow Goose,” I add for clarity, to which none of the North American geese that Jack is familiar with can really compare. “Big as a horse last time I saw her.”

“You have a giant goose? Seriously?” He looks from Katherine to me, eyebrows up to his hairline. I nod, straight faced. 

“Yes! She's wonderful. Wait until you meet her. She's-” Katherine perks up a little as she rambles on about Kailash's virtues, despite Jack's skeptical expression. It's an expression that freezes oddly in place as Katherine's voice fades.

The scene slows and then stops. Even the falling snow halts in mid air.

Well then.

“Where are ya, ya bastard.” I scan the lake and find him not a leap and a half away.

“You are upset with me.” And what bloody understatement that is.

“You're damned right I am.” Ombric sighs and glides over. “Go on then. Explain yourself.”

Arms crossed, I notice I'm down to four and the stumps are gone. Ombric pauses a moment, looking at me with those ruddy Seeing eyes of his, before he draws in a steady breath.

“Very well.” He sweeps out an arm in the direction of a couple boulders and we cross the lake to settle there. 

“You wish to know why I did not intervene, either as myself or as Father Time who I was rapidly becoming, but bear with me for the moment,” he requests, as though I have a choice. “Now, you realize that if Nightlight and Katherine had succeeded in their meeting with General Winter, we'd have known about what Boreas was doing much earlier?” 

I nod. 

“And as such, we would have attempted to free the Snow Queen and put Jack to rights?” The significant look he gives me raises my hackles warily. 

“And what would the problem with that have been?” Ombric's shoulders sag in disappointment. 

“So different now, Bunnymund,” he sighs. “Our positions were once quite reversed, you remember? And now it is you whose emotions are clouding your thinking.” 

That's not the same thing! Acting while something is happening is a whole different kettle of fish than trying to change the past. I open my mouth to argue, but Ombric presses on.

”You were protective of Jack just now, keeping the General from affecting him until you were sure of his intentions.” Hell, yes, I was. After all the rest of that Winter bullshit, I wasn't letting any of them muck about with Jack without some reassurances. “Consider, my friend. If General Winter had been free to put Boreas in his place, what might have happened to Jack?”

“Well, I...” What would he have done? Taken the staff back surely. And then?

“General Winter would have reclaimed the stolen power from the staff and released Jack from his binding, allowing him a proper mortal death.”

His words sink into my chest and curl into a hard lump.

“Ombric...” Damn. That's exactly what the General would have done. What had he said? Not within the realm of his influence, on account of the Guardian magic. But back then?

Jack had been a boy, neither a mortal nor a properly formed spirit, trapped by dark magic in a role that was never intended to be his.

“You had to leave them there until Jack became a Guardian?” Ombric nods and straightens a little, vindicated I suppose, his hands clasped in his lap. He's right. I'm not thinking clearly. “All right. Fine. But why leave Jack alone then? Once the Guardians were formed, if you'd told us what was going on, we could've kept him safe. I know Manny couldn't do anything by the time he realized what the hell was happening, but after, couldn't you-?”

“Sadly, no. When the Guardians came to be, other spirits took notice. They were very aware of you, if you recall.” That's true. We'd had a few run ins with other spirits testing our power. “If any of you had met Jack, there would have been an inevitable clash with Boreas, who watched him closely. One of you would have made the connection. And you were all in transition, the magic shifting, Belief changing. Under those circumstances, Jack would never have become a Guardian. Some of you might not even have survived. I could see all too well the way such paths might go. As hard as it may have been, this is by far the best possible outcome, I assure you.” 

If this was the best that he'd seen, I shudder to think of how badly the rest must've gone.

“What a wretched bloody mess,” I rub a hand over my face. “Jack deserved better than that.”

“Indeed,” Ombric leans over to fish around in the snow piled against his boulder, for what I don't know. 

Gazing out across the lake, the still landscape stirs up old memories. Bah. No point in dwelling on the past. The present is trouble enough. Leastways this particular problem is done with. Jackie's magic is stable, the winter seasonals should be set to rights, even Katherine and Nightlight are back. 

My eyes flicker over to where we left the others. Frozen in place, there's a weary curve to Jack's shoulders and he leans a little too heavily on his staff. I should get back to him, take him home- ah, no. We'll have to check in at the school first, won't we?

“Aha!” Ombric cries triumphantly and pulls Jack's cape out of the snow with a flourish. So that's where it had got to.

I reach for it and Ombric hands the cape to me without comment before peering into my face, his eyes slowly misting over. Oh no.

“You care for him a great deal, Bunnymund,” he begins in one of his wise-sage tones, full of Knowing. “And he you. In fact-”

“No. You can stop right there, mate. I don't want to know.” Time was I'd have liked nothing more than to see exactly what lie ahead, but that's not me these days. I know there's something between Jackie and me, I'm just not sure exactly what'll come of it, especially not now he's free to do as he pleases. 

A fleeting image of the Snow Queen enters my mind, the gentle way she'd approached Jack, how beautiful she was and yet how surprised by the goodbye kiss Jack had been. I wasn't sure what to make of it. Jackie certainly hadn't pulled back from me. He'd been downright cuddly. So it was hard to say. 

Jack might no longer need me, but will he still want me?

“Very well, my friend,” Ombric smiles and pats me gently on the arm. Smug bastard. Let him have his foresight. Whatever harmless thing he's seeing, it's best left to unfold on its own. It can't be anything important. Ombric's learned not to meddle with time in his new aspect, present situation being an obvious example.

“Listen, if you bugger off again and don't show up for another half a century-”

“Oh no. I'm quite done with that. I've only stayed away because, well… I've never been able to hide things from you very effectively, have I?” So that's why he's been so stand offish, not being able to say anything. Guilt for thinking so badly of him blows away the last of my frustrated anger. 

“Stay, then.” The invite broadens his smile even as he shakes his head.

“Soon, perhaps, but not yet. Take care, Bunnymund,” he says, vanishing without waiting for a reply. Well. I suppose we'll see.

Time slowly winds itself back up, reality springing into motion again. There's a sensation I haven't felt in an age. 

Katherine's hands swing back into motion, gesturing as she speaks, Nightlight watching her fondly. Jack looks overwhelmed on the subject of the Giant Himalayan Goose. I shake off the remaining stillness just as I hear my name.

“-Bunnymund was after one of her eggs for his collection for the longest-”

“Oi! You lot.” Three heads snap in my direction in surprise, likely on account of me changing location in an eye blink. “We should get back to the school. Make sure everything's all right.


	27. Chapter 27

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

Wait, wasn't he just-? Huh. I must be more tired than I thought. Bunny looks better though, down to about the right height and with just a couple extra arms... and he's got my cape!

“You found it.” Aster meets us halfway towards the buried path that I could find in my sleep. He gives me a little half smile and shakes it out before swinging the cape onto my shoulders. Shimmering runes skitter across the fabric and the silver clasp fastens itself with a satisfying click. I hand my staff to Bunny so I can find the slits and push my arms through. That's better. I feel more solid now that I have it back.

“Oh that's lovely,” Katherine leans closer to examine it. “Where did it come from?”

“North made it for me.” Bunny hands me back my crook with a wider grin.

“North? Really?” Both Katherine and Nightlight look skeptical.

“What?”

“It's only, well, he's never been that good with...” She trails off, looking a bit unsure.

“He's mellowed a bit,” Aster jumps in. “He's not usually much for textiles, I'll grant you, but North can apply a more delicate touch to things when he can be bothered to.” Yeah, okay. I can see that. I've witnessed the way he attacks a block of ice. Aster turns and begins to walk, the rest of us following suit.

“If that's so, I may make a few requests of my own. Or maybe he'll teach me how to weave the runes in like that.”

“North's not going to say no to anything you ask once he discovers you're back.” Nightlight nods in emphatic agreement. 

“Oh, he's not that bad.”

“He dotes on you like mad, you know he does. He'll be insufferable for months.” Bunny delivers the statement in the tone he always uses for North, part exasperation and part fondness, with a large helping of resignation thrown in. 

The air is still as we walk and the drifts aren't too bad. We make good time. It doesn't occur to me until we're halfway there to ask why we're walking at all.

“Ummm, Bunny? Why aren't we using a tunnel?”

“It's not far, and I don't want to risk coming up in the middle of a bunch of parents and kiddies.”

Huh. That makes sense.

“You all right?” His brow furrows. 

“Yeah,” I can walk. Think I might sleep for a month after this though. If I had enough energy I'd move the snow off the path, but thankfully it isn't too deeply covered. We make our way there, close but quiet, Bunny and I in the lead with our shoulders brushing together as we walk. 

It doesn't take long. More and more dreamsand glitters in the air, not putting the few people we see to sleep, but having a sort of calming effect. I can't see any parents in the school yard when it comes into view. With the storm gone they should be here soon. Sandy lights up the night, floating in front of the building with his eyes closed, and there's a ridiculously tall woman with long dark hair next to him.

“Emily Jane!” Katherine cries out and waves. Emily Jane? Kind of a plain name for a spirit like that. The tall woman glides forward to meet Katherine, who's trying to explain too much at once and speaking at a speed Tooth would probably appreciate. 

“So, that's Mother Nature?” Aster and Nightlight nod. Sandy must have convinced her to come. Better late than never I guess. Then I spot the hump in the snow between her and Sandy. 

Anna.

No. What the hell did General Winter call her? Marzanna? And Bunny had used a different name too. I feel like a moron for buying her BFF act. And she'd flirted with me! What if I'd- no. I don't even want to think about it. Ugh. Tawis' bullshit was bad enough and he actually tried to help, even if he was an asshole about it. At least she's contained, with loops of dreamsand winding around her. 

Her head raises a fraction and Anna’s eyes meet mine. She wails an inhuman sound into the night, making every hair on my head stand on end. It hurts. Scenes exploding through my thoughts like fireworks-

_We can’t trust you with anything._

_Get out and don’t ever come-_

Sandy snaps a brilliant strand of dreamsand into her side and she crumples. 

The nightmare. 

Sandy throws me an apologetic look. 

“Jack?” 

I shake my head at Aster. I’m okay. Bunny’s okay. The Guardians are here and nobody hates me. I’m fine. Or I will be. Fuck. I even out my breathing and glance over to where she’s lying prone. I’m so sick of people messing with my head.

A few seconds later a snow plow trundles by, blue light flashing, punctuating the heavy silence. I'm struck by the normality of it, like it was just another snowstorm, sudden and fierce, but with no real harm done. Something everyone will forget about it once Christmas arrives, never having any idea...

“Jackie?” Aster tentatively lays a hand on my shoulder. He's nearly back to normal, only four arms showing, and the blood that matted his fur is gone. I try and smile for him, but his frown dips lower. 

“I’m all right,” I say, and he nods after a moment.

“Let's go check on the kids, yeah?”

“Yeah.” They’ll still be worried about Jamie.

Later? Nightlight projects into my thoughts. Oh. That's going to take some getting used to.

Sure. He nods and drifts towards Sandy. Tooth isn’t much farther off and is issuing orders to mini fairies when she sees us, the whole flock turning abruptly and waving like mad. 

I manage to wave back a little, but I'm exhausted. At least the walk to the school is free of snow, like a burst of wind shot through and carved a path. Works for me. Bunny cups my elbow in his hand, as though I might be unsteady, but I feel a bit of a second wind coming on as we get closer to the school. I’m glad for it. I shouldn’t be leaning on him like this all the time. Even if I want to. 

Aster. I was missing him before even if I didn’t realize it. So much. And then back at the Burrow – whenever I fall apart with Bunny, it’s like I get reassembled with a little bit more of him included each time, the pieces he’s left behind pulling me back to him more and more. Whatever Boreas was doing to me, it didn’t end up changing anything. It’s kind of overwhelming how much I just want to burrow into Bunny and never ever leave. 

But I can’t. I shouldn’t. He’s done so much for me already and asking for more would be selfish. Especially after my screw ups. I should work on being a better Guardian. Like Manny believes I can be. Even with… well, I guess I do have a few more believers.

As we near the entrance, I spot Cupcake inside the wide doors, huddled with a group of much smaller children, expressions animated and bright. She must be telling them a story. When she glances up she sees me, pointing so the other kids turn. Suddenly the doors and windows are filled with small faces pressed against the glass, little hands waving at me. That’s a lot more kids than I remember seeing my in the gym.

“I think you have fans, Snowflake.” Maybe they’re looking at Bunny?

“Jack!” Monty slams out of the doors, nearly tripping over his own feet, Pippa right on his heels. They run out to meet me over the shouts of an unseen teacher inside.

“Where's Jamie? Is he okay?” I grab Monty’s arm before he topples over into the snow.

“Whoa, calm down. He's fine. The storm's over too.” A blue blur catches my eye. Tooth is flitting over to Aster and speaking with him intently. He shakes his head and holds up a finger, opening up a tunnel right beneath them and dropping down. Tooth hovers.

I tilt my head in their direction and the kids catch on, watching as Bunny reappears with Jamie on his shoulders, a smear of chocolate across the kid's chin. A muffled cheer goes up from inside the school. Huh. Wonder if any adults caught that? Baby Tooth zips up to her sister? Mom? The two of them hugging and chattering rapid fire. 

“Jamie!” The moment his feet touch the ground, both Monty and Pippa are on him.

“Hey!” Jamie giggles. “You're kind of squashing me here.”

“Jaime Bennett, don't you ever do that again!”

“The teachers we're really _really_ upset,” Monty emphasizes. “Really.”

“I didn't exactly have a choice, you know,” he shakes them off. “Oh no. The concert!” 

“It's canceled.,” Pippa says. “Everyone's just waiting for parents to get through the storm.” As if called, a truck with a front plow attachment turns into the parking lot and begins clearing the way. 

“It can't be canceled,” Jamie moans, not phased in the slightest by his brush with icy death. That might have something to do with the dreamsand still lingering in the air. Bunny is gesturing something at Sandy across the yard.

“Sorry, kid. Guess it's not going to happen tonight. Your teachers will be pretty frantic. You guys better go back and wait for your parents.”

“But we worked so hard...” Jamie crumples in on himself, clearly torn up over it. “And you were hurt because of me.”

“Hey, that's not true.” Hell, if anything it's the other way around. “Jamie, it's okay. I'm fine and the danger is gone. Maybe another-”

“The storm is over? For sure?” He straightens and his eyes stare into mine, hopefully. “Are we safe outside?”

“Yeah, but-” Jamie turns away, already ignoring what I'm saying, shoulders squared intently.

“Come on, guys,” he pushes them towards the school, muttering something I can't hear. Monty and Pippa blink at him and then snap into action, scrambling back inside. He looks back, pausing by the steps, “Just, wait right here, okay? Don't leave!”

I nod and he darts through the doors, a few stray cries of “Jack Frost!” slipping out as he does.

“What's that about?” Bunny asks.

I shrug. Better do as he says though. Jamie's pretty fierce when he's determined and I am more than happy to sit down. Aster crouches beside me.

“Well, Sandy says things should be all right. Storm's gone. Temperature's reasonable for the time of year. He's used the dreamsand to calm things a bit too, just lightly mind, so no one falls asleep in the cold. They'll shake it off and feel better, put any thoughts of monsters and such down to tricks of the imagination.”

Sandy gives a tip of his hat to me from the other side of the lawn where he's floating by a cluster of other Guardians and spirits. 

“How long do you want to wait for the anklebiters?”

“I’d like go home, but I don’t want to leave until Jamie’s mom gets here. You can go if-” 

Aster snorts, the curve of his lips telling just how unimpressed he is by that suggestion. It sparks s familiar warmth in my chest. 

“We’ll wait then. Burrow’s not going anywhere.”

A minute later a couple teachers emerge from the school. They peer around and look relieved. Someone else appears with a shovel and starts properly clearing the steps and path to the parking lot, which is beginning to fill with vehicles.

Inside the school looks chaotic, but then a kind of order begins. The kids tromp out and line up in the yard, shuffling as parents stream towards the doors, other children piling out onto the steps to watch. 

Jamie and Pippa pop out last and face the others, Monty just off to the side with a video camera. 

“Just the once. It's still very cold,” one of the teachers admonishes him. A couple dozen parents clump together, a few small hands waving at them in recognition, waiting curiously. The children on the stairs are giggling and pointing while those in Jamie's group are switching between nervously looking at their folders and staring at me. 

Jamie meets my eyes with a grin. Then he hums something that sounds like Pop Goes The Weasel, before the children open their mouths and sing:

 

_Look out ! Look out !_  
_Jack Frost is about !_  
_He's coming to nip your nose;_  
_And all through each night,_  
_The Guardian sprite_    
_Is working where nobody knows._

_He'll climb each tree,_  
_So nimble is he,_  
_His silvery powder he'll shake;_  
_To windows he'll creep,_    
_And while we're asleep,_    
_Such wonderful pictures he'll make._

_Across the grass_  
_He'll merrily pass,_  
_And change all its greenness to white;_    
_Then home he will go,_  
_And laugh, "Ho ! ho ! ho !_  
_What fun I have had in the night_!  
_What fun I have had in the night !"_

 

The children who hadn't been singing are whispering and chattering as the song finishes, my name spoken again and again in the cold air, dozens of eyes shiing as they look in my direction. I feel like I'm going to float right off the ground. A song, for me. I can't help the bubble of laughter that escapes, grin plastering itself across my face. 

The assembled parents cheer, clapping muffled by mittens and gloves, and the rosy cheeked children break formation to run to them. Their joy is swelling and glowing, the blanket of snow that was so menacingly cold before now glittering with beauty. A handful of tired and cranky adults are blots on the landscape. How can anyone be unhappy after that? 

A flick of my wrist and a dozen or so tiny sparking flakes of joy flit into the air and find their targets. One Dad lands on his ass at the sudden mood swing and promptly begins a snowball fight with his manically giggling children. It spreads like it's contagious. Snowballs and fun times!

“Jack!” Jamie slams into me with a hug. My staff drops in the snow as I squeeze him back with all I've got. “Did you like it?” 

“Are you kidding? That was awesome!” 

“I know!” he pulls back to smile up at me, his joy lighting him up. Wait, he's not actually glowing is he? It must be me. Glancing around, the other kids have a brightness too, but not quite as intense as Jamie. Believers. Wow. Guardian of Fun, Joy, and general Awesomeness. I like that. Guardian of Awesome. I'm going to petition for a title change.

“Jamie!” The call startles us both. My hands are shaking a little, and my hair feels like it's standing on end, but it’s great! Like I've been hit by some kind of happy lightning bolt of Belief.

“Over here, mom! You're going to start coming over again, right?” He looks at me intently until I nod. “Because you need to see the family tree.”

“Sounds great.” Our family tree. 

“Cool!” Another quick squeeze and he skips back, waving. “Bye, Jack.”

Wow. Catching my staff with my foot, I flick it up into my hands and give it a twirl before walking backwards, clearing out of the way of any adults who might walk through me while they make their way to the parking lot. I feel fantastic and right and… and I don't even have words… 

“All right there, Snowflake?” 

Aster. 

“I'm amazing!” I surge forward, buoyed up by the incredible feeling, and press my lips against his. It only lasts a second before I bounce back, but he looks so ridiculously stunned I have to do it again. I use his bandoleer for leverage this time and his lips soften against mine. When I break off, Bunny blinks for a moment at my wide grin, and then he laughs. It's small, almost disbelieving, but he laughs. 

He _laughs_.

“You're laughing!” 

“Apparently so,” Aster smiles. 

I kissed him and he's happy! Believers, and a song, and family, and kissing... and no more messed up winter spirit bullshit. “This is the best day!” 

“Jackie, I don-” Nope. No more talking. I grab his shoulders with both hands, dropping my staff to pull him into another kiss, Bunny's joy bubbling at the edge of my senses. Fuck Old Man Winter. Maybe I do get a happy ending.

“The best, Bunny. This is the best everything,” I insist when we part, Aster’s arms looped around my waist firmly. 

Bunny opens his mouth and closes it, shaking his head at me fondly and blushing. Blushing! 

“Whatever you say, Snowflake.” 

“Yeah,” I grin and press into him, fitting my head under his chin. “Let’s go home.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter. There will be one more wrap up chapter to come. Let me know if there's anything you want to see in that I haven't sorted out already!
> 
> The song the kids sing is a slightly modified version of the poem found here:  
> http://www.albany.edu/cela/literacycorner/activities/JackFrost2.htm


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right, I was planning one more chapter in the Jack/Bunny/Jack pattern again. However, I decided to split the parts up because of how it was developing and the time jumps between sections. So, three more chapters.
> 
> Also - if there's something you'd like to see that hasn't been touched on or wrapped up, let me know in the comments!

❄❄ JACK ❄❄

 

“Jackie, I just-”

“Hey,” I lean forward and rub my nose across his, “I know what I want.”

I really, really do. I’ve felt more like myself in the past week than I have in months. More _me_ than ever. Kissing Aster after the battle had been a spontaneous thing, but I’d meant it and didn’t regret doing it. If Bunny hadn’t felt anything in return it would have been different… but he had. He’s even insecure enough about it to have asked if I really want to be with him three times now.

It’s actually pretty reassuring. I mean, he wouldn’t be so anxious about it if he didn’t care, right? And I can feel how happy it makes him sometimes, a surge of emotion that wells up when he’s not overthinking things. 

Maybe if I explain myself better, he’ll worry less? We’ve got time. After solstice, we’d needed to recover and then North had dragged me out Christmas night. That had been a blast. Between Monty’s video going viral online, with feel good articles like “Burgess Blizzard can’t freeze the Holiday Spirit!” popping up across the internet, and North’s plans, my believer base had exploded.

Aster said North had been planning something for ages, but with everything going on he hadn’t gotten around to telling me. And then North had been in such a whirlwind over Katherine and Nightlight, that it hadn’t been until the afternoon of Christmas Eve that he’d hurried me out of the Warren and explained. Not that it had taken much on my part. I’d trailed along with North on the borders of and a little beyond my usual range, nothing too extreme, bringing a blanket of snow with me. A White Christmas. Even if it was only for a day, I was able to give one to places that rarely saw any kind of freezing temperatures, and North happily gave me the credit, with little comments added on to thank you notes for cookies and the like. I’d flown over a few places the next day, to see how the snow was faring, and had so many kids shout greetings that I’d lost count.

Today is a rest day, though. Just me and Aster in his burrow. We’ve got a couple days until we’re expected at North’s New Year’s party. Lots of time to figure things out, right?

Bunny is sitting in his favourite chair, looking up at me, fond but hesitant. Before, I would have been anxious too, and confused. Not now. I figure subtle is the last thing we need, so I climb into his lap and go for broke. 

“I’ve thought about this a lot, you know. About being close to you.” And yeah, this part is kind of hard to explain. “When I was hiding in the Warren before… I did watch you. I wanted, well, first I just wanted to be friends. I wanted you to see me. That didn’t exactly work out, for a lot of reasons, but I always wanted to be close to you and you were important to me, even if you didn’t know it.”

“Jack, it’s all right. You know I don’t begrudge you being here.”

“I know.” I did. Still, Aster would have been completely justified in tossing me out on my ass and had instead done the complete opposite. “Do you remember after the whole Pitch fight, when we were helping Tooth at the palace?”

“Sure.”

“And you picked me up-”

“I do remember something like that,” he smirks a little. “On account of your ribs and leaping between levels.”

“Yeah, and you stayed for a bit and, well...” I’m pretty sure the blush on my face finished the sentence. “And then later, you were checking on me, and you asked if I had a place to stay...”

“Ah,” I can see it click then.

“I felt so fucking guilty about that, about lying to you, and you were being so, so nice and I-” 

“And you wound yourself up about it and that’s when you fell into your memories.”

“I thought it would help. It didn’t.” I’d frozen over a small chunk of the Warren, and probably would’ve done worse if Bunny hadn’t found me. “After, when you brought me here and yelled at me? That helped.”

“Yeah?” I nod. Sure he’d been kind of mad, but he’d refused to let me push him away and had insisted that we were friends. “Good. I’d hoped I hadn’t been too hard on you, but I couldn’t let you fly off, not without working things out between us. I was angry, at you and at myself, but mostly I was worried.”

“I got that. Plus, you took care of me,” the nightmare I’d had back then and Aster’s concern had always stuck with me, “and you actually wanted me to stay. We were friends and we got closer, and I kept following you everywhere… I was kind of pining, I think? Maybe even before that. I didn’t realize it at first, because I’d never had those feelings to know, but yeah. Pining.”

Aster looks a bit dumbstruck, but my mouth doesn’t want to slow down, determined to get every embarrassingly clingy thought out. 

“And then you’d say things. About us being together and me not having to be alone anymore and, I know what you meant, but God, Aster. I wanted to wrap myself up in you and never come out. You have no idea.” I thunk my head into his shoulder, my hands on his chest. 

“Right,” the word sounds a little strangled, “this is honest confessions time, is it?”

“If you want.” I hope these will be the good kind of confessions, though I’m not quite hopeful enough to look him in the face yet. I wonder if he can feel that? 

“It wasn’t right away for me. You have to understand, Snowflake,” one of his hands comes up to cover mine, “I hadn’t… there’s been nothing like this for me since before I came to Earth, when I was practically a different person. Not even after the shift, when my feelings went a bit haywire from the influence of human belief.”

Which makes Bunny and me kind of similar. Neither of us have much experience with relationships. 

“After finding you in your burrow though? You were always here, with your jokes and your ruddy teasing, asking me about feelings. I liked it far more than I knew I should. And the touching… Strewth, I tried so hard to put those feelings away.”

“You didn’t want-” Aster shushes me, hugging me tight.

“I did, Jackie. I wanted too much. Ask Sandy if you like. He saw right through me. Knew before I knew myself.” Sandy had been trying to tell me something too, now that I thought back. Guess we’d both been a bit oblivious. “All I could think was that there was so much out there better for you than me. You were meeting more spirits and I felt like I was being selfish, trying to keep you.”

A snorted laugh escapes me in response to that. I push myself up to look at Bunny, his eyebrows reaching high on his face, arms going slack and hands sliding to my hips. This is going to be a thing, isn’t it? Idiot.

“You never needed to keep me, Bunny. I pretty much moved into your life all by myself. Boreas’ bullshit aside, you’ve been stuck with me since ‘69, unless you finally get around to throwing me out.”

Aster grins, “That right?”

“Uh-huh.” No more overthinking this. “I’m not letting anything mess it up this time, either. As long as you still want me here.”

“Course, I do.” 

“Good, because there’s no one else I like better than you. I don’t know who you think I’d shack up with.”

“Your winter friends-” Seriously?

“Are you kidding? Anna did flirt with me like crazy, but that was weird even before I discovered what a fucked up monster she was. Yuki Onna was straight up creepy. The Queen was sort of nice, but I never thought about her that way. And Tawis,” I shudder when I remember what he did. 

“What about him?” Aster scowls.

“He’s a handsy asshole.” The look on Bunny’s face thunderous. He’s jealous! I really shouldn’t enjoy that as much as I do. “Do you know him?”

“We went ta him and his brother for help finding ya. He was talking rubbish.” What the hell did he say? I figure I better clear up exactly what happened and avoid Aster doubting how I feel on the subject.

“The jerk backed me against a table and kissed me.” Oh wow, murder eyes. “It was terrible. What did he say about me?”

“Nothin’ important,” Bunny fairly well growls, his hands gripping my hips tighter. “He won’t be bothering you again.”

I almost feel sorry for Tawis given what Bunny’s going to do to him if and when he decides to show his face again. Almost.

“Good. The only person I want to be with is you, Cottontail.” Bunny huffs and rolls his eyes at me. “Seriously, Bunny. I mean it. Everything’s better with you. Everything.” I press my forehead against his and Bunny kind of deflates, loosening his grasp and tilting his head to nuzzle our noses together.

“Same here, Snowflake.” Maybe this time it’ll stick. If not, I’ll just have to keep telling him. 

Kissing him softly, I shift a bit in his lap and his breath stutters. Kissing works okay with Pooka, but other things get a much better reaction and now I have both the time and energy to test some theories. I run my hands over his ears and hardly tilt my hips at at all before Bunny’s grip tightens again.

“Jack,” he groans. “You don’t know-”

“I watch humans a lot, Bunny. I probably know more about how this works than you do.”

“Oh, you think so, do you?” Aster’s eyes narrow at the implied challenge. “You know some of my aspects are related to fertility, right?”

Yeah, this is going to be fun.


	29. Chapter 29

❀❀ ASTER ❀❀

 

Last Easter was such a disaster, I could never have guessed that a year later it would be like this – Warren in bloom, Guardians stronger than ever, Jack by my side.

It could have ended so badly. Could still. Honestly, the whole thing between us would have fallen apart in the first few weeks if not for Jackie’s ability to find humour in everything. His laughter is bloody infectious. We’re both in untrod territory, unused to intimacy and passion, and that makes for misunderstandings. Fortunately for this old codger, Jack mostly rolls his eyes when I get surly and defensive.

It works though. Not the way either of us had thought it might, me still being Pooka enough to make for certain fundamental differences, but we were each as invested in pleasing the other as ourselves. Jack in particular got a mild high off intense bursts of joy. Of course, the spirit-bunny-fertility side of things made for other effects as well.

“How did you not see this coming, Aster? You’re a Bunny!” Jack had fallen over in stitches, the larrikin, and not been phased at all by how overwhelming my own personal desires had gotten. Passion was a new feeling to be giving into for me. “You’re just lucky my body is eternally seventeen or I wouldn’t have a hope in hell of keeping up.”

Thankfully it’s evening out, though I’m still more easily distracted than I’d like. I’d threatened to ban the cheeky brat from the Warren for the month before Easter if he didn’t keep his hands to himself. I would have had no hope of finishing on time otherwise.

Finish I had, however, and with googies to spare. My run was smooth as silk this year and thanks to Jack and Baby Tooth the clean up is half done ahead of schedule. Between the three of us and the re-purposed paint bots I had on hand, we made quick work of the worst of it. 

Might be needing to find a new name for Baby Tooth. Her growth may have slowed down, but if what I think is happening does, she’s going to be in for another big change. Jack is skeptical, but I’ve seen spirits merge before and the not-so-little sheila spends a ridiculous amount of time with the unsettled Wind Jack keeps trying to tame. Least it’s less disturbing than it was. The remnant of Boreas’ original power is too erratic and playful to be threatening. Jackie doesn’t need it any longer for flying either, the way his powers have grown now that Belief in Jack Frost is stronger. If Baby Tooth does merge with it, I’ve no doubt her personality will be more dominant, but I’d best give Toothiana a heads up about the possibility.

There’s no clock out here in the gardens, but I can feel the way time moves in the Warren without one. I reckon Jack should be back soon. It was a full moon last night and the Williams are determined to get the gong working again. Ombric had given his thoughts on the matter at North’s New Year’s bash, spurring the project on, but no one’s seen hide nor hair of him since. That left Nightlight and Jack to translate moonbeam messages and they’ve eagerly thrown themselves into the endeavour. They get on like brothers, those two, which they are in a way. I know Jack appreciates a friend to fly with and is eagerly introducing Nightlight to the wonders of the modern world. Katherine, predictably, has all but vanished into the Internet. She’ll come up for air eventually. Likely whenever the Snow Queen shows up with news about Kailash.

Huh. Something’s triggered the Burgess door. Wonder if Jackie decided to swing ‘round to see the kids before coming home? I listen for a few minutes and when he doesn’t call out as he usually does, I lope over to see what’s come through.

One of my bots is there. Hmm. I go around to avoid any potential blast from the paint nozzle, as I’m fairly certain this is one of the ones that was left at North’s. Did he really think I’d fall for that? Picking it up from behind, I can tell by the weight that it’s empty. It’s shut down too. Maybe North’s just trying to rattle my cage? He’s yet to retaliate in our theoretical prank war. It’d be just like him to wait until right after Easter though…

I give the bot a good shake. Nothing happens. Might as well take it back to my workroom and examine the thing. There aren’t any more disturbances and I arrive home, the metal egg still inert. Placing it on the worktable, I crack open the casing. The tank is completely dry. 

That settles it. North’s just taunting me with a few pokes into my territory before he actually strikes. I’ll have to warn Jack to be on his guard. I pull apart the innards to be certain, but nothing’s been changed. No extra parts or runes or what have you. The nozzle is blocked up though. On closer examination, I notice the blockage is actually a piece of rolled up parchment. Likely some smug bit of gloating over his getting through one of my doors so easily. I tug it free. Let’s see what he has to say. 

Unfurling the tightly curled paper as I read, I realize my mistake when I expose the tiny shimmering runes halfway down the page. The magic flickers over me in an instant.

“Clever bastard.” At least my voice is the same. The note has wiped itself clean now that it’s done its work, leaving me nothing to go on. What the hell did he do? 

“Aster!” Jack calls, the door to the burrow thudding shut. “You in here?”

“Workroom,” I say, feeling the strange way my lips move around the word. I try to look at myself to get an idea of what’s been changed, given there’s no mirror handy, and realize the extent of it just as Jack enters the room. Should’ve grabbed some clothes.

It’s one of the rare instances I’ve witnessed that Jack’s been shocked into silence.

“Is- Is that you?” his stunned voice breaks the quiet. His hair is wild from his flight to wherever he’d opened a portal, the laces of his shirt perpetually untied. Must have left his crook and cape by the door.

“Yeah, it’s me.” 

“You… What happened?”

“North happened. Bloody prank.” Jack continues to stare at me. Is it that awful? “I should grab something to wear.”

I slip out and make for my room, Jack hard on my heels.

“So you’ve never been..?” he gestures, words trailing off.

“No. Ruddy show off. Couldn’t keep it simple, could he?” Striding through the doorway, I unbuckle my now ill-fitting bracers and drop them on the desk. Bandolier too. Yanking the wardrobe open, I rummage around for pants. The only ones I’ve got likely won’t fit quite right, though I suppose it’ll have to do for now. Can’t run around with my bits out, can I? The mirror on the inside of the door reflects my frowning human face back at me. This had better not last for more than a day or two.

“Umm… Can I?” Jack reaches out tentatively, though he’s had blanket permission for touching for a while now. 

“Uh, sure,” I step back from the wardrobe. Why not? Might as well satisfy his curiosity. Jack carefully traces my markings with a finger, his skin looking even more pale against the dark earth tones of what North’s given me. I’ve only a light smattering of hair, except on my head where thick dreadlocks hang down in shades of grey and black. “All right, Snowflake?”

“It’s different. Is this really what you’d look like as a human?”

“No idea, mate. Never been human. Though,” I stare at myself in the mirror again, “it might not be far off from what I’d choose myself.”

“Australian?”

“Yeah. Always liked it there, right from the beginning,” when I’d built the landmass. If I’m going to be wearing a human form, this Aboriginal look suits me fine.

“I kind of like it too. It certainly offers quite the view,” he waggles his eyebrows at my still naked form. “It isn’t permanent though, right? 

“No.” Even if North gave it his all, Belief in the Easter Bunny would eventually override his bit of trickery and revert me.

“Good. I’d miss your fur.” 

Another thing I hadn’t expected when we’d gotten together. I’d thought the physical differences, especially the more animal like ones, would be a barrier to get over. Something odd for Jackie to get used to. They hadn’t been. The fur in particular has turned out to be a feature and Jack revels in it, which is probably why he usually has such a hard time keeping his hands from wandering.

What had North expected when he’d created this? Embarrassment? Annoyance, probably. Oh hell, we’re meeting at the Workshop in three days, which means that this will last until then and I’ll freeze my arse off even more than usual. Least he’s only targeted me for a switch. If he’d flipped Jack… No. North wouldn’t have. He’s a smug braggart but he isn’t unkind. He knows enough not to push that button.

This new face must say more than the old one, because Jack practically reads my thoughts.

“If it the prank had been on me-” 

“No. This was made for me.”

“But North could, if he wanted?” Jack tilts his head, hand stilling on my arm.

“He… maybe, yeah.”

“Would that- would that bother you? I mean, I don’t actually want him to, not that I- fuck, this is coming out awkward and wrong.” I wrap and arm around him and pull him close, feeling the coolness of his cheek on my bare shoulder.

“I don’t know, Snowflake.” But it’s an idea that’ll stick in my mind for awhile now. Pooka Jack Frost. “Don’t worry about it. North’s savvy enough not to try without asking first.”

“Okay,” he nods, seeming satisfied, then slides a hand up my chest. “You know, we should take advantage of this while it lasts.”

“Wha-” Jack cuts me off, hand around the back of my neck pulling me down for a kiss. Once, then twice, and… Oh. Is this why humans are so keen on kissing?

“That’s... different,” I suck in air, trying to catch my breath.

“Uh huh.” He kisses me again. Strewth. “Cleaning’s on hold.” 

“Bloody oath it is.”


End file.
